Trade

After losing consciousness for three days, I would be lying if I said that I was not terrified of the consequences if I insisted on going through with this project. And the fact that not even Craige nor Teacher Kimmy were able to pull me out of the trance just worsened my fears even more.

'What if I have to live the rest of my life thinking that I'm Lyrae?'

'What if I seriously go crazy?'

'What if I won't be able to come back?'

These questions kept me up all night and the gnawing pain on my feet didn't help a single bit in making me get some sleep. That's how I ended up thinking about what-ifs all night long.

And I don't know if it was because I've run through all the worst possibilities in my head, but when I got up and took a shower, all the things that I've been fretting about seemed so menial. It was like the cold water from the shower either washed away my fears or flushed the last bit of my sanity.