A Little Heart To Heart Sometimes

"Namjoon?!? You need to wake up its getting late and we should be leaving soon".
"Jin, Why did you guys not wake me sooner and let me rest for this long?".
"What do you mean. Isn't it because you're tired. Were not that horrible to not let you get some sleep".
"I didn't say you were 🤚but thanks for letting me sleep. Where is everyone else?".
"I told them to go ahead and I would wake you up".
"Oh okay Jin" I said standing up and streching a little "Let's go. I'm ready for bed."
"Yeah but don't go to bed straight away. I want to talk with you".
"What about?" I asked and continued to mumbled under my breath sounds like I should regret going home now.
~~~
Sitting on in a lounge chair with Jin sitting across from me on the couch.
"Lets talk Namjoon. I feel bad that I didn't ask you whats wrong before now"
I didn't answer right away. I was trying to think about other things that I could talk about the bothering me instead of my real issue.
Jin continued speaking, "Are you going to answer me. I know you don't want to worry us but I want you to confide in me.... Take your time, I know it must be hard but please talk to me about whats going on with you".
Looking down. I sighed and looked up at Jin. Before speaking I glanced away and spoke, "I lost a friend, she passed away. She wasn't just my friend but Yoongi and Jungkook's friend too....
I miss her" I said a little more quietly.
I looked back with eyes glistening and made eye contact with Jin.
I want to see her before I forget her. But I can't. I feel like the memories together are slipping away from me.
He seemed to be able to see my hurt and grief in my eyes and asked, Are you grieving appropriately, Namjoon? Did you go to her funeral.... Were any of you able to go?
I looked away from him again and mumbled, "I might have. If you could call it that...yes". I said this last part so he could hear.
"Mind if you tell me a little about her?".
I didn't respond for a while and let the silence wash upon the both of us. But finally I spoke up.
"She was amazing". I didn't say more as I was lost in the memories of her.
He cleared his throat. "Where did she live, and how old was she?".
"Nowhere specific really.... Younger...🙄" I mean Mandi-Beth never fully clarified this for me
"Are you sure about that?" He asked looking at my quizzically.
"What makes you asked if I'm sure."
Just now you got defensive... Never mind. I'm not going to pry.
I sighed that he let it go and thought good because she was a ghost but we did find out "she lived in the United States....."
"Really" Jin said with curiosity sparkling in his eyes.
"If you want to have a quick stop to give a greeting to her you can. We leave the day after tomorrow for the United States. You could leave tomorrow if you wanted to".
"I'll keep that it mind...."
Jin stood up streching and I stood as well.
"And Jin, Thanks for checking on me. Umm, have you checked in with Jungkook and Yoongi yet?
"Yes I did"
"How are they doing?"
"Well... Yoongi said he'll be okay but he brushed me off pretty quickly. I just hope its the truth.
and Jungkook. I think he's doing ok."
I grabbed him on the shoulder as we began walking towards our rooms. "Seriously he's very emotional are you sure hes doing okay?"

"Actually yes, he is.... But I'll still pay attention just in case".
"Ok Jin. That make me feel relieved then. As a leader I wasnt paying attention to their feelings and was just stuck in my own depression".
He turned around to face me placing both hands on my respective shoulders. "Namjoon you have the right to grieve and were a team. So don't feel bad and just work through this as slowly as you need"
He dropped his arms and continued onto his room and turning the knob of his bedroom door.
I spoke again, "Thanks Jin. and again thanks for worrying about me".
He smiled and gave me a nodded before saying, "You're welcome. Stay strong". Before going into his room and closing the door.