Trickster Granny

Noticing all the strange looks, Zhao Jia's Empyrean might erupted out. "This is a clan secret!! On pain of death, there will be no leaks!"

Zap! Sizzle!

In the corner of the chamber, a training dummy burst into flame and visibly melted before everyone's eyes.

Collectively, everyone hissed.

"Mom, what-what should we do?"

Zhao Wen looked at her Grandmother.

Must I imprison my own father.

Zhao Jia sighed.

Chen'er must Mother imprison you in some faraway cave?

As the silence rolled, a sweet melodious humming could be heard. Soon Mu Huizhong arrived carrying a tray with hot coffee.

Upon seeing Tian Cai, she giggled. "Hubby, Wife finally found you. I've brought your evening joe."

"My Woman!" exclaimed Tian Cai, quickly heading over.

"I brought sweet biscuits as well."

"Beauty of my Dreams!"

Munching on a biscuit, Tian Cai enjoyed a sip of coffee.

Patting his head, Mu Huizhong said, "Earlier, Wife noticed Hubby was upset. What's wrong?"

At this point everyone was just staring at the two.

This 5 year old was already enjoying married life!?

Tian Cai sighed. "It's good Beauty is here with open ears. This coffee really makes everything better. It appears Grandfather is Savant's City's Gossip King. If he knows, then the whole city knows. This means, he can let out the secret of Divine Miracle Dung to everyone. Grandfather is a walking time bomb."

Mu Huizhong chuckled, "Wife understands…but this should be easily solvable by you."

"Me!?"

"Mhm...Don't you have a teacher with uhm special skills. Surely your teacher has a way?"

"Hahaaaha, of course! Beauty is the best!"

"Mom, son has to leave. Son may have a solution to this problem!" With that, Tian Cai quickly disappeared with Mu Huizhong.

Zhao Jia and Zhao Wen sighed with relief.

Cai'er thank you, Mother won't have to imprison her own father.

Chen'er, will you ever know that your grandson saved you?

Returning, to his new courtyard, Tian Cai was planning on how to visit the Ling Clan when he found Zhu Shensheng already resting in his courtyard.

"Teacher your visiting? Disciple was just planning on going over to ask for guidance."

The Divine Pig chuckled, "Visiting?...One could say that."

Sniffing and feeling the slight tingle in his nose, Tian Cai said, "You weren't visiting were you??"

Ignoring his question, Shensheng looked at Mu Huizhong. Snorting she said, "Us two have things to discuss."

Mu Huizhong cupped her hands. "Are you here to negotiate?"

"Indeed this Queen has that intention."

"Hubby has a request. Afterwards, we can discuss at leisure."

"Disciple has a request?"

"Teacher, apparently..."

For the next period of breaths, Tian Cai detailed the problem with Zhao Chen.

"That Old Fart is Savant City's Gossip King!?"

Through gritted teeth, Tian Cai said, "You know he's my Grandfather."

Ignoring his comment, Shensheng continued, "There is a way, however whether you desire to learn it is another question."

"What do you mean?"

"It's related to that Evil Eye thing."

"Evil Eye! Where! Where!" blurted Tian Cai, looking about as though the greatest of calamities were about to befall him.*1

Shensheng shook her head.

Surprisingly both Ling Fan and Little Genius were superstitious.*2

How to fix this?

"As you know the Evil Eye is a curse that derives power from emotion and then a jinx or hex is born."

"The skill I can pass on is called Divine Hex. With this skill it allows you to bring out emotions twenty fold. Divine Defecater is based from the Divine Hex."

"Using the Divine Hex you increased the need do that twenty fold!" hissed Tian Cai.

"Mhm."

"Even so, how can it be used to resolve the issue with my Grandfather?"

"How do you train a pet to not do something? Every time you're Grandfather talks gossip, have him have a bowel movement the size of the moon."

Tian Cai's face blackened. "You want me to brainwash my own Grandfather like a pet!!"

"Mhm."

This!!

Tian Cai paced about.

Is this the only way?

Mu Huizhong whispered, "Hubby, there will no more coffee in 29 days."

Tian Cai stiffened.

The next moment, he was kneeling before Shensheng. "Oh mighty divine teacher, please instruct this lowly one."

Shensheng looked at Mu Huizhong. "You-You just what did you say to him?"

"Secret!"

"Humph!"

After teaching Tian Cai the Divine Hex, Shensheng departed with Mu Huizhong.

Tian Cai decided to spend some time with Fei Hung. In his mind, he arrived in Fei Hung's courtyard. Looking about, he was surprised to see there were no surprises. In fact, it was quiet. Tian Cai's heart jumped.

Wasn't it too quiet!

Concerned, Tian Cai bolted into the manor, "Fei Hung!"

Several times he called out but there was no response. The first thing he noticed out of place was the den was clean and perfectly tidy.

When had his old den ever been this clean.

NEVER!

Alarmed, Tian Cai roared, "Little Brother!!"

In response, a red light buzzed. Startled, Tian Cai looked over and saw a sign.

RED: Studying in Progress...No Disturbing.

"What bull crap is this!"

Suddenly, Little Zilla waddled out. Holding a tray and wearing glasses and a tie, the mini Godzilla looked like a butler.

With a murmur, Little Zilla offered the tray to Tian Cai. On it was a note and memory jade.

"For me?" asked Tian Cai.

Little Zilla murmured with a nod.

Tian Cai started to read the note.

"Big Brother, Fei Hung is diligently following Mother's guidance. If you're reading this note, it means Little Brother is studying in seclusion. As this is my personal time, I request you do not disturb. Upon returning to the outside world, please hand this memory jade to mother. Little Brother thanks you in advance."

Just in case he missed something, Tian Cai reread the letter.

"Little Brat! You scared Big Brother!" he exclaimed, crumpling the note. Not satisfied, he looked deeply into Little Zilla's eyes, tearing the note into a thousand little pieces.

"Next time I come, he better come out when I call!" spat Tian Cai through gritted teeth.

Swiping the memory jade, Tian Cai returned to real world. Thinking about the memory jade and the Divine Hex, he decided to ask Zhao Wen for guidance.

Soon, Tian Cai found Zhao Wen in her courtyard. Whistling she was knitting away at what looked a newborn's robe.

"Mom, what's this?"

"Cai'er you're here. How's Mom's little genius?"

"Son came for some guidance."

"Considering your relationship with your betrothed, you didn't want to ask her?"

"Mom, you know its all a lie...she's just a bodyguard."

Zhao Wen shook her head.

Son, wake up.

"Mom, what are you knitting?"

"Ah this? It's Fei Hung's newborn robe."

"That's for Fei Hung?"

"Mhm. You know you have one too."

"I do?"

"Cai'er when you woke, Mother said something to you...do you remember my words?"

"When I first regained my memories you said…"

"I will give you all that you didn't have in your previous life. Cai'er, shouldn't Mother do the same for Fei Hung."

Tian Cai smiled with understanding and hugged her. "Tian Cai loves Mom best."

Patting his arm, Zhao Wen asked, "Tell Mom, what help you need?"

Tian Cai passed over the memory jade. "Just now, I visited Little Brother and he's already greatly changed. Here are the recent memories he recorded."

Taking the jade, Zhao Wen said, "Mother will take a look later. What concern do you have?"

Tian Cai cleared his throat and said, "Son found a way to prevent Grandfather from revealing any secrets only..."

"Only?"

Tian Cai proceeded to tell her about the Divine Hex.

With wide eyes, she said, "There's such a technique?"

"Now you understand why son asked for guidance."

"This? Even mother cannot make such a decision. Let's ask Grandmother."

Several breaths later, both Tian Cai and Zhao Wen stood before Zhao Jia.

"There's such a wonderful technique!"

Tian Cai looked at his Mother.

This?

Zhao Wen rubbed her glabella.

"Haa if I had this technique years ago, this Old Lady could've easily rectified all the bad habits those men developed over the years."

Zhao Wen, sighed, "They inherited Grandfather's bad traits." Immediately, she covered her mouth, realizing she made a mistake.

Zhao Jia harrumphed. "Indeed,"

Weng! She drew a blazing sword of blue flame.

"What-What is that!!?"

Zhao Wen hissed, "Heavenly Punishing Sword!!"

Killing intent rained down like a torrential downpour. "When I find that Coot! He'll get his!!"

"Son, you may not know, Grandmother's main weapon is the sword. Everything Mother learned was from her."

KAAA!! Like an industrial torch, a hot sizzling blue flame shot into the sky. Unable to withstand the pressure, the clouds burst apart and disappeared into the distance.

Tian Cai's mouth fell open in a giant O.

"Like she has the Heavenly Punishing Paddle for you she has the sword for Grandfather. If you noticed there is one trait belonging to all the punishing weapons...all except this one are blunt weapons. This shows how much she loves her children."

"She'll kill Great Grandfather with that!! What-What did he do!?"

Tian Cai's heart trembled. For the first time, he saw his Mother's eyes moisten.

"Grandfather, he-he ran out on the Clan."

"He what!"

A tear streamed down her cheek.

"Mom, don't cry. Son will find him-I'll-I'll bring him back. Don't cry!"

"It's not that son. It's been 8700 years since he ran...every now and then she remembers and this..this happens. Seeing her hurt pains my heart. It may not look it, but Grandmother is crying."

Zhao Wen caressed Tian Cai's face. "Son, your Grandmother died during childbirth. Thus Great Grandmother, raised me she-she is has always been my Mother."

Hoarsely, Tian Cai said, "Oh."

Zhao Chen rushed in. He fell to his knees, "Mother! Son begs you to stop crying!! Son will do anything!"

"Yang Ming! In these some thousand years have you ever thought of your family!!?"

"Mother, son will die trying to find him. Son will bring him back!"

"Chen'er do you promise!"

Zhao Qiang appeared and quickly knelt behind Zhao Chen. "Grandmother, grandson promises as well!"

The Heavenly Punishing Sword flared again. In response, Savant City's defensive formations activated.

"This Old Lady remembers all his old habits. Son, you promise me one more thing!"

"Mother, anything...please stop crying!!"

"The thing that reminds me the most about him is you gossiping and revealing secrets. Must you be so much like your father! MHM!? MHM!? MHM!?"

"Chen'er will stop! Son promises!!!" Zhang Chen grabbed Zhao Qiang's head and slammed it into ground.

"Father! Why!!?"

"Qian'er promises as well, anything that reminds you of father. We'll stop, we promise!!!"

Sputtering, Zhao Qiang said, "Grandson promises!! Father, let go of my head!!"

"Good..Good..Good! Finally, this Old Lady's heart is at ease."

With a harrumph, Zhao Jia withdrew her power and put away the Heavenl Punishing Sword. Sighs of relief could be heard all about.

Zhao Chen released Zhao Qiang who sprung up with a clearly dejected face.

"This Old Lady is tired, you both return and rest."

Solemnly, Zhao Chen said, "Mother, Son promises to find him."

Zhao Jia patted his shoulder, "Good Good Son."

Eyes moistened, Zhao Chen said, "Come Qiang'er, let's return."

After the two left, Tian Cai ran up to Zhao Jia. "Granny, are-are you alright?"

"Ha child...you think this Old Lady needs some Divine Hex to control her own son and grandchild?"

"You-You did that on purpose?"

"Cai'er, didn't Mother already say Grandmother was known as a Trickster?" said Zhao Wen.

Tian Cai took a deep look as his Granny.

Never ever, ever upset her!

"Humph! You think Granny would allow you to use that technique on her own son? This way the problem is resolved. Promise me, you will only use that evil technique on your enemies."

"Of course! Tian Cai promises."

"Now how about you teach Granny that technique?"

Tian Cai's face stiffened.

Zhao Jia's eyes narrowed, "You don't want to pass such a wonderful technique??"

Zhao Wen interjected, "Grandmother, it's a forbidden technique passed down by Yun Hao. Cai'er is completely unable to pass the technique over."

The next morning, the Zhao Clan was bustling with activity. "You're saying a servant came earlier and informed us we have important guests visiting. And we have to dress appropriately?"

Tian Cai groaned, "We only have 27 days left..We need to go out and find a tree growing expert!"

Mu Huizhong chuckled.

So Master has always hated such events.

"Fine let's go," said Tian Cai.

When they arrived, Zhao Jia and Zhao Wen were already standing in their formal robes.

"Waa! Mom, you look so pretty."

Mu Huizhong bowed, "Mother-in-law. Grandmother-in-law."

"Cai'er its good that you're here however, you need to be careful. The ones visiting today are the heads of Savant City's great five powers."

Behind, Zhao Wen was Bai Guang. When she looked up, her eyes struck him dumb.

"Little Brother, looks good in his formal wear. Big Sis is impressed," said Bai Guang with a thumbs up.

Tian Cai cheeks burned rosy red and he looked way.

"Tian Cai are you listening to Mother? The visitors will be Empyreans, you absolutely cannot expose yourself."

"Empyreans, how-how many?"

"Humph, four others. Beware child, they may be amiable up front but its a facade. Each of those fellows are snakes. Especially that City Lord fella," said Zhao Jia.

Qin Rong appeared with Ling Wenyan, Ling Ming and Ling Fan.

Cupping her hands, she said, "Matriarch, as requested I invited the Ling Clan over.

Ling Fan's eyes twinkled like stars and looked at Zhao Jia and Zhao Wen. Running over, she said, "Ling Fan greets bosses!"

She was about to greet Tian Cai when Mu Huizhong blocked her view. As she looked up, Mu Huizhong was staring down at her with crazy eyes.

Little Hussy!!

Not backing down, Ling Fan glared back.

Just what did I do to you! If Master doesn't do something about you...I

"Sister Ling your here. Seniors, Zhao Tian Cai greets you" said Tian Cai, cupping his hands as he slipped past Mu Huizhong's legs.

"Hubby, Wife asks that you don't..."

Tian Cai clasped Mu Huizhong hand, "It's alright, Little Killer is harmless."

Everyone looked at Tian Cai.

Little Killer??

Zhao Wen's eyebrows curled.

What's exactly going on between those three?

Realizing he made a mistake. Tian Cai laughed it off. "Hahahaaa! That's a joke this Young Master made. Often, when meeting Sister Ling, she's wearing a mask er-so I just started calling her Little Killer...it's funny am I right?" he said looking about.

Bai Guang chuckled, "Little Brother's humor is the best."

Gray Shadow said, "Youngest Master light hardheartedness is refreshing!"

Ling Ming, the doting father that he was, laughed proudly. "Indeed when my Fan'er dons the mask, her sword like eyebrows appear fierce and her aura becomes intrepid. Sigh! Fan'er you look so much like your Mother."

Ling Wenyan looked at his son, shaking his head.

Hopeless!

Everyone started laughing.

"Haahha, so that's how it is."

A guard ran over. "Reporting! Gu Clan Patriarch, Gu Zhixin has arrived."

Waving a hand, Zhao Wen said, "Escort them in."

Soon, the guards led them over. A middle aged man in deep green robes came forward. Following him was a teenage boy. With beady eyes, he stared amorously at Bai Guang.

"Senior Zhao, Sister Zhao, this Gu greets you."

"Young Gu, it's been awhile. How are things with the Gu Clan?" asked Zhao Jia.

"Brother Gu, you surprise us today with a visit," said Zhao Wen.

"Our Gu Clan couldn't be better. Yang'er come pay your respects. This is my son Gu Yang, he's just returned from the Capital and has enrolled in our prestigious Savant Academy."

"Seniors, this lowly one greets you," bowed Gu Yang, with one eye on Bai Guang. His focus appeared dead intent on the curves of her chest.

Catching the look, Tian Cai's eyes narrowed.

Keep looking at her, see what happens!!

Reporting, "Sun Clan Patriarch Sun Deiming has arrived."

Being led over was a dark haired robust man in pale yellow robes. Along side him were two daughters. Cupping his hand, he said, "Senior Zhao, Sister Zhao, it's been too long since we last met. You two, quickly present yourselves."

The daughters hurried over and bowed.

"Seniors, Sun Roulan greets you. It's our honor to meet you."

"Seniors, Sun Roumei also greets you."

"Greetings Junior Sun, how are things at the academy?" asked Zhao Jia.

"Brother Sun, your daughters are both growing up to be quite beautiful," said Zhao Wen.

"Mayhap, one of them matches well with your son??" suggested, Sun Deiming.

Zhao Wen's eyes glittered behind a giant smile.

You want to marry into my Zhao Clan?

Tian Cai's heart jumped.

Didn't he already have a betrothed? Please No!!!

Zhao Jia chuckled, as she pushed Mu Huizhong out. "Junior Sun, please meet Tian Cai's betrothed...the Golden Path Empyrean Mu Huizhong, of Ninth Heaven."

"Eh!!"