For what looks good can perhaps be evil,
and what seems evil can be good in nature.
~~~
Vacation's over. I had travelled and enjoyed much of those days, reminiscing at the time I was only for myself. I knew I've accepted those facts in me. I knew I have moved forward.
Classes started again, and I'm on my sophomore year of university. Gladly, I stayed regular despite the hardships of the past year.
I came back to the dormitory, now with a new room, away from the past. Not because I hated it, but I wanted a new start with fresh surroundings.
I had a new roommate, a freshman. He was the same height as me, with good-looking eyes, thin build, "You should control yourself" my mind yelled to me.
Everyday, he waves and smiles at me, bending his face a little, like a dog bending it's head for curiosity, he looked cute.
We always talked in the evenings, all about random stuff- games, animals, life, school, anything. He was fascinating.
I kept reminding myself not to, but it seemed I was falling for him each day we're together. His actions of care, the happiness he try to give me, all those encouragements I get from him, the support he lays for me, I fell for them.
I fell for false hopes.
I told him I liked him. But he told me he's not ready. That he wanted us to stay friends, even if we were few steps higher, he wanted us back down.
I was alright with that idea. If it's what he wanted, then I'll be happy with it. But then I can't seem to approach him like before.
The nights were silent after that. He kept smiling at me, but I can't absorb his positivity. All I see is his aura, telling me I should limit. I can't return a smile like he can't return the feelings.
Then, I heard from people, he's with another. I didn't know the details, but it was true. I saw them.
I saw them together, and I know I can't bear to look at him anymore. It hurts, cause I still want him like before.
I'm back to square one, but now, it's harder, I really wanted him.