Chapter 42: 2-12: Toad in the Hole

Disclaimer: Being neither British nor Japanese, it should therefore come as no surprise that I own neither Harry Potter nor Naruto, nor anything from their respective franchises.

At breakfast the next morning, Albus informed Iruka that they would be gathering to explore the Chamber just after lunch. Classes had been canceled for the day as at least two Professors of core subjects, one Adjunct Professor, and one elective teacher would be part of the expedition, and other staff might also be called in as well.

As lunch was in progress, a number of people began to arrive, and were promptly invited to join in with the meal. Amelia Bones and Alastor Moody ate at the head table, with the latter casting numerous detection charms over the table, his chair, his plate and cutlery, the food itself, and anything else he deemed 'suspicious' (it was a long list). About halfway through, an unfamiliar pair of adults stepped in, though the younger of the two was clearly familiar to some in the hall.

"BILL!" Ginny Weasley's delighted shout echoed through the Great Hall as a fiery-haired missile streaked from the Gryffindor table to impact with a laughing young man that Iruka presumed to be William, the oldest of the Weasley siblings. The man was tall and lean, with handsome features framed by a ponytail of the trademark Weasley red hair; he wore sturdy casual clothing with dragonhide boots and a long coat, along with some sort of fang for an earring. The overall effect was such that quite a few witches in the room clearly seemed to wish they were the ones presently sharing a hug with the dashing young wizard.

After several minutes conversing with five of his younger siblings, during which his companion (a middle-aged wizard with dark hair and skin, dressed in similar style minus the earring and carrying a large satchel) looked on in bemusement, Bill headed for the staff table with Ginny in tow. The first-year girl was pretty much attached to her big brother, her arm around his waist while his was draped protectively over her shoulder. She was also smiling, really smiling, for the first time Iruka had seen since the Chamber.

"Professor Umino?" he asked Iruka, who nodded. "Bill Weasley, from what I've heard the one Weasley you've yet to meet. I wanted to add my own thanks for saving my little sister," he gave Ginny a one-armed squeeze, "both you and Professor Flitwick. I'll be thanking the third member of your group later, as I'm told he doesn't like being singled out in public. The Weasley family owes all three of you big time."

"It was really a team effort," Iruka deflected. "More than just those of us that went down, others helped figure out what was going on. Besides, the only reason we could attempt the rescue was knowing the rest of the staff were here, protecting everyone else. Everybody played a part - mine was mostly running around and nearly getting squashed flat by a giant snake. You're helping too, actually," he said with a nod towards Ginny, "and in more ways than whatever you've been called in for."

"William is a professional curse-breaker working for Gringotts," Albus explained, "with a specialization in exploring and securing ancient ruins. Once I explained the circumstances, the goblins were quite reasonable about recalling him from his assignment in Egypt."

Bill nodded. "Yeah, goblins don't mess around when it comes to family honor. Besides, having Gringotts staff part of this expedition is good publicity for the curse-breaking division, so between those and the fact that I can be back in Egypt tomorrow, they were willing to let me take this job. Of course, it doesn't hurt that they've been promised a share in the value of whatever we find down there. As I'm sure you noticed yourself, goblins are experts at getting the most from a deal. My team has made use of a couple of your seals ourselves, they're quite handy, so thanks for that too."

"I'm glad to hear they're helping," Iruka replied with a smile.

"Well, don't let us keep you;" the Headmaster said jovially into the following lull, "both you and your colleague are welcome to partake of refreshment. I dare say your brothers, and several of their Housemates, wouldn't mind having you return to your old House table."

All of the Weasleys present gathered at the Gryffindor table, while the other man from Gringotts took one of the extra seats placed at the staff table. He introduced himself as Jake Fairfield, and explained in an accent Iruka didn't recognize that he was tasked with collecting some things from the basilisk carcass, "after Hogwarts' Potions Master, of course," he added genially at the harsh glare his comments had provoked from said wizard. Snape responded with a grudging nod.

Lunch passed in a blur of pleasant conversation, Iruka taking the opportunity to speak with the visitors and broaden his knowledge a bit. Jake, as he insisted everyone call him, was apparently an expert on potion ingredients, especially those that were rare or otherwise difficult and/or dangerous to obtain, which explained why he'd been chosen for this particular assignment. He had far more stories than he had time or permission to share, mostly about dealing with foreign cultures and exotic creatures. Madam Bones largely kept things polite and bland, though she did explain a bit more about the workings of law enforcement in Wizarding Britain. Moody kept his answers terse and fairly uninformative, eyeing whoever asked him a question with suspicion.

Finally, the meal ended, and the students slowly left, reluctant to miss out on whatever was going on. Iruka accompanied the Headmaster and guests, along with Professors Flitwick, Snape, and Kettleburn, into the antechamber across from the Great Hall. There, they found three more people for their expedition: There was Lucius Malfoy, unsurprisingly, along with a short, squat woman in garish pink who could only be the somewhat notorious Dolores Umbridge, Senior Undersecretary to the Minister of Magic, and a particularly vicious bigot responsible for many harsh laws regarding non-human and part-human beings. Standing apart from the other two was a... well they were a person, though adjectives beyond that were nearly impossible to discern thanks to their shapeless, all-concealing gray hooded robes and gloves. The chuunin had discussed with Pandora the possibility of consulting with the Department of Mysteries regarding their research, but decided that too little was known about the shadowy researchers called Unspeakables to trust that they wouldn't either steal the research (and his and Pandora's memories of it) or take Iruka himself for study.

Introductions were made all around (with the Unspeakable giving the codename "Fauld") before the entire group trudged up to the second floor. They first stopped at the two messages on the wall, where at Albus's request Bill examined both. The original message had been charmed to resist cleaning, but the charms didn't last long under the wand of a professional curse-breaker. Upon entering the haunted washroom, they found the sink entrance already standing open. "And now," the Headmaster announced, "we must enter this pipe which leads to the passage by which the Chamber is accessed. The journey down, I am informed, is entirely safe and quite exciting, but also unfortunately rather dirty. It was primarily for this reason that I advised you all to wear or bring clothing suitable for getting dirty." He proceeded to remove his fine hat and outer robes, revealing a heavy second set of robes of plain grey fabric, and hanging them on a conjured rack before tying up his hair and beard with a quick wave of his wand. Iruka, Filius, Professor Snape, and Madam Bones also shucked and hung their outer robes; Moody, Fauld, and the Gringotts employees seemed comfortable to descend as they were; Malfoy acted unconcerned and Umbridge simply glared at the hole in disgust.

"Hem, hem," the squat witch cleared her throat for attention. "I must have misheard you, Headmaster," she said in a simpering, high-pitched voice with a saccharine smile that very much did not reach her eyes. "Surely you don't mean that we are to reach Salazar Slytherin's legendary secret Chamber by sliding down a filthy drainpipe?"

"I am afraid, Dolores," Albus replied with a more sincere-looking kind smile, "that this is the only known means of entry. Did Lucius not inform you? My owl to him did state that accessing the Chamber would necessitate getting rather dirty." Umbridge just huffed and glared angrily at both wizards.

"I'll go first," Filius offered into the tense silence that followed, "as I've been down there before; once I've cast a few Cushioning Charms I'll message up. You'd be best waiting at least fifteen or twenty seconds between people, to give each person time to get out of the way." At the Headmaster's assenting nod, the Charms Master stepped out and dropped away. A minute or two later, a silvery weasel flew up out of the pipe and announced "All clear!" in the tiny Professor's voice.

Bill Weasley went next, followed by Moody, then the Unspeakable. One by one the various participants slid down to the tunnel deep below, before proceeding forward. "Careful," Bill warned as they approached the location of the shed skin, "I don't like the look of the stone around here. Too much of a disturbance could cause a collapse, so we'd best keep from making too much noise until we're through to somewhere more solid."

Albus responded by conjuring some timber braces to reinforce the walls and ceiling. "A temporary measure," he noted, "but at least for today, better safe than sorry." He braced a couple other sections of tunnel as well when Bill pointed them out as suspect. The entire trip, both the cursebreaker and Moody were casting various detection charms, but unsurprisingly (given the fact that this route had been traversed recently without incident) their scans came back negative. As they approached the entrance to the Chamber, they began to smell an increasingly-strong odor of decay, soon becoming enough of a problem that all were forced to make use of Bubble-Head Charms (with Iruka's helpfully provided by Filius).

Entering the Chamber proper, Malfoy's expression became somewhat wooden, while Umbridge showed a touch of disappointment. Moody's eye was scanning wildly in every direction, pausing for a moment near the entrance as the scarred Auror gave a brief, subtle smirk and jabbed with his wand, while both Bill and the Unspeakable were casting numerous detection charms. Albus casually commented, "Now that we have seen this Chamber in the... ambiance its creator intended, perhaps we could do with somewhat clearer illumination?" A complex movement of his wand sent several brilliantly-glowing orbs of white light to hover high in the air along the length of the Chamber, showing the entire room in its ophidian glory. They also lit the massive carcass of the Basilisk, the obvious source of the stench permeating the Chamber.

"Yep, that's a Basilisk, all right," stated Silvanus Kettleburn, "you can tell by the horns, the size, and the coloration. Rare and bloody dangerous, they are - glad I'm only seein' this one dead."

"You would have us believe that this beast was killed only two days ago?" Malfoy demanded angrily, "It would take weeks or months to rot to this degree!" Both he and Umbridge showed a mix of outrage and eagerness.

"Actually, Lucius," Snape interjected, sounding far more amiable than Iruka had ever heard from the man, "a creature such as a Basilisk could well decay far more quickly than would be natural. It was a beast born of and sustained by powerful Dark magic, and now with its death that same magic is acting upon its carcass. As is commonly known, Dark magic is a predominantly destructive force, and it has now turned from sustaining the Basilisk to functioning in a far more typical fashion. Add to this the unnatural nature of the beast, which could also possibly cause it to decay more rapidly in order to restore balance, and this level of decomposition is to be expected."

When this assessment was confirmed by both Bill and the Unspeakable, both of whom had now focused their attentions on the corpse and the area around it, the Death Eater and Senior Undersecretary deflated. Once the dead Basilisk had been declared 'safe' (or at least as safe as such a thing could be), both Potions experts quickly moved over and began examining it. Contrary to his earlier behavior, Professor Snape was now conversing quickly with his counterpart, discussing which portions to harvest, how, and in which order.

"Hem, hem..." By the Sage, this woman was making him long for the incessant "Dattebayo!" of his former student. "I find it most distressing the amount of damage done to this priceless historical site. Surely proper wizards should have been able to deal with the beast without smashing the place apart like a couple of trolls?"

Iruka adopted a placid smile. "I'm afraid that's largely down to the Basilisk itself, Ma'am; it showed a tendency to go through the columns instead of around them, particularly once it was blinded. On the positive side, the fact that they were just smashed by a creature instead of blasted by spells means they should be reasonably simple to fix once the experts have finished checking the Chamber over."

Said experts were presently occupied by a stretch of wall near the statue's feet. "Headmaster!" Bill Weasley called, "I think we've got something over here!" The entire party, minus the two potioneers currently elbow-deep in rancid Basilisk, made their way over. "We're detecting signs of a space of some sort behind this wall section," the cursebreaker explained, "but we've been unable to access it. Our only clue is this carving, just here." He pointed, and just above Iruka's eye level was a very small, shallow carving of a snake, not unlike the one on the taps upstairs. Even in the brighter light provided by the Headmaster, it was difficult to notice.

"I believe I may have a solution," Albus said, "but I must ask all of you to stand well back. We do not know precisely what may lie within, so it would be best if you all kept a safe distance." The assemblage did as they were told, some a bit reluctantly, before the aged wizard began making grand, intricate gestures with his wand. As he was doing so, Moody sidled up next to Iruka.

"Smart move," he commented quietly enough that only the chuunin could hear, "lettin' 'em all think it's some complicated secret spell while your boy does the real work. Means none of 'em'll be able to open it themselves once we're out. I'm guessin' it was the same for the entrance in the loo?"

"And a door to the Chamber itself," Iruka replied equally quietly. "He didn't want his involvement publicized."

"Can't blame the lad," Moody said, "that kind of attention is loads o' trouble. Twice over, if he's doin' what I think."

At around this point, a section of wall about the size of a typical door separated from the stone around it and sank downwards, stopping when it had become a near-seamless part of the floor. Dumbledore stepped back, and beckoned Bill, Moody, and the Unspeakable to once again do their work. Unlike previous areas, here they did find a magical booby-trap just inside the doorway, set to deliver a powerful electrical shock to anyone stepping or casting spells through. Thankfully, it was easily dismantled, apparently somewhat by design.

As the trio cautiously began to probe deeper into the newly-revealed area, Malfoy addressed Iruka. "While we wait, I am rather curious. You have all been decidedly vague regarding exactly how such a fearsome beast was slain. Perhaps you would care to... enlighten us?"

"Obviously, when the culprit first called the thing out, we closed our eyes to avoid meeting its gaze." The chuunin launched into the (edited) tale. "Dying instantly wouldn't have helped our rescue mission much, after all. We used large-area explosions, aimed blindly around where its head should be. When it shrieked in pain, I risked looking at it in a mirror to check whether both eyes were gone, and thankfully they were. The mirror, by the way, was because the group assisting our research into the attacks determined that the petrifications were all caused by indirect viewing of the Basilisk's eyes - in a reflection, through a ghost, and such. I figured by using a reflection, even if I was wrong and the eyes weren't out, at least I'd be only petrified and not dead."

"Once we could fight with our eyes open," he continued, "we did our best to put it down, but nothing we had could inflict meaningful damage through those scales. That left us basically just trying not to get eaten as it continued to track us by scent and sound. It was while I was running away, keeping its attention off of Filius and the kidnapped girl, that it smashed through those pillars. Finally, it managed a lucky hit with its tail that left me unable to keep running. When it tried to finish me off, it made the mistake of opening its mouth and exposing flesh that wasn't so heavily protected. A single attack through the roof of its mouth managed to breach a venom sac, and Basilisk venom seems just as deadly to Basilisks as to anything else."

"In other words," Lucius responded, "you killed Slytherin's monster mostly through blind luck."

"Well," Iruka temporized, "what else would you expect from only two wizards, one of whom isn't great at combat magics, going up against a Class XXXXX magical beast?"

"What I want to know," the Senior Undersecretary cut in, "is who is actually responsible for this debacle? After all, whoever it is has caused a great deal of trouble and damage, and should be duly punished!" Iruka really, really didn't like the hungry gleam in her eyes at the last word.

"The same person as last time, Dolores," said Dumbledore, "But this time, Lord Voldemort was acting through somebody else. By means of this diary." He pulled the ruined book out of his robes and displayed it to the witch. "A very cunningly crafted magical device," he continued, "wrought with some truly foul Dark magic to deceive and ensnare the unwary, with the intention of stealing a victim's life to power the incarnation of a copy of its creator's teenaged self.

"A clever plan," the Headmaster commented flatly, now eyeing Malfoy as much as Umbridge, "Because had our intrepid rescuers not discovered this book, why - Ginny Weasley might have taken all the blame. No one would have ever been able to prove she hadn't acted of her own free will..."

Something in the canny old wizard's tone had Iruka paying careful attention. There was clearly more being said here than just the obvious, and Malfoy's reaction (or sudden lack thereof) said that he was receiving the message loud and clear. As Albus continued, a picture emerged to the chuunin: He too had heard the gossip about Lucius Malfoy brawling with Arthur Weasley in Diagon Alley that summer, like common Muggles, while out getting Hogwarts supplies for their respective children. It was wildly out of character for the arrogant pureblood aristocrat, which suggested an ulterior motive. The Weasley father's Muggle Protection Act and other activities had been decidedly unpopular with the Malfoys and their ilk, providing ample motive; Lucius's prior association with Riddle gave him the means; a distracting scuffle could have been used to create the opportunity. It was more than enough to strongly suspect the man, but left no actual proof.

Iruka began gathering a decent pool of yin chakra, before speaking once Albus had finished. "It's a pity that we don't know who slipped that diary into Miss Weasley's schoolbooks," he commented calmly. "After all, whoever it was, they unleashed a Basilisk, a living weapon of mass murder, into a school full of Wizarding Britain's children, including Mr. Malfoy's own son and heir! I shudder to think of how close we came to suffering the deaths of random masses of students in the halls. But of course, Mr. Malfoy," he now addressed Lucius, "you needn't worry too much. We take the safety of our students quite seriously here at Hogwarts."

He gave the wizard a large, benevolent smile while using the gathered yin chakra to crank up and tightly focus the sakki he was now emitting, aiming it at the Malfoy patriarch as powerfully as he could. Any experienced shinobi would have shrugged it off and scoffed at the parlor trick, but Iruka was the only person in the country fitting that description. "As we did with the Basilisk, we will deal with any threat to the children of this school as promptly and thoroughly as possible. Of that you can be certain."

In spite of the cool air of the Chamber, Lucius Malfoy was sweating noticeably when Iruka abruptly let off his sakki a moment later, without giving any outward sign, before nodding to the man and moving off to converse with Madam Bones. He was hoping she had access to more information about the Death Eaters, such as their methods and tactics: If Riddle had effectively made two attempts to return in two years, then another war was likely inevitable and would probably come sooner than the chuunin would like. He needed to know everything he could find out about the people who would then become his enemies. Thankfully, the DMLE did indeed have extensive records from the previous war, and its Director was quite willing to send him a copy of everything she could, asking only that he share any useful insights with her and Dumbledore.

When the specialist team finally cleared the new area, everyone present (even the pair harvesting the Basilisk) came over to look. What they found was, frankly, anticlimactic. It was a set of rooms laden with dust and lacking anything of real interest. There were hearths burning with magical flames, along with some Spartan (and now more than a bit decayed) wooden furniture. Based on the furnishings, it looked like this area had been something of a retreat for Salazar Slytherin, containing a simple bed, a table with a single chair, some now-empty bookshelves, cabinets, and wardrobes, and a side room identifiable as a workspace by the damage, stains, and scorch marks both on the large tables and the room itself. Unfortunately, whoever had last accessed these rooms had clearly taken everything of interest or value, as even the most fastidious search had failed to turn up evidence of any further hidden secrets. Fortunately for Iruka's peace of mind, the thick layer of dust suggested that this emptying had happened long before Tom Riddle had ever attended Hogwarts.

Conjured ladders were used to reach the statue's open mouth, but the space within proved another disappointment, containing only bedding, shed skins, and droppings. Once it had been declared safe, the two harvesters climbed up to gather the skins and some of the droppings, just in case they might prove useful in their work. Though the rest of the business in the Chamber had been completed, the two reported that they would be working for hours yet, so Albus turned a quill from his pocket into a Portkey up to the dungeons, where both men could clean up before dividing the foul-smelling fruits of their labor.

He then pulled a long coil of rope from a pocket that must have been expanded on the inside, and instructed everyone else go gather and take hold of it. As Iruka did so, grasping the end opposite the Headmaster, he felt a slight tug on his sleeve and saw the end of the rope beside his hand disappear. "I confirmed yesterday evening that Portkeys can in fact bring people out from this Chamber, at least if made by myself. As Headmaster, I am able to authorize Portkeys to function in spite of the castle's wards, and so we shall be returning to Miss Warren's post-mortem residence directly. Is everyone ready, nothing left behind? Well then, Portus!"

Travel by Portkey was like a somewhat less injurious version of the effect that had first brought Iruka to Britain. Thankfully, the short trip also meant that the dizzying sensation was quite brief before all attached landed in the restroom as promised. He heard Harry stumble beside him, and quickly stuck an arm out for his student to grab and steady himself, disguising the act as a stumble of his own.

"Well then," Albus announced, "thank you all for coming today. I trust our esteemed guests are satisfied that our recent troubles have been fully resolved?" Both Malfoy and Umbridge nodded curtly and clearly reluctantly. "Excellent! In that case, I believe we may adjourn, as we could all likely stand to bathe thoroughly at our soonest convenience." He conjured a set of simple privacy screens. "Those who brought or can access a change of clothing and wish to change immediately, these should serve."

Undersecretary Umbridge, Bill Weasley, and Professor Kettleburn left to clean up and return to work, while Madam Bones, the Unspeakable, and Lucius Malfoy headed for the booths. The last of those three called out "Dobby!" as he entered his booth, and thoroughly confirmed his guilt to those who knew about the warnings Harry had received. The house-elf that answered the call was one of the most pitiful creatures Iruka had ever seen: A painfully thin body was dressed in a tattered and stained pillowcase, which hid neither the bandages nor the numerous scars and partially-healed burns and bruises of varying ages. Seeing evidence of how badly the poor elf was abused made the chuunin wish even harder to 'volunteer' its master as a test subject for Orochimaru.

A few moments later Albus excused himself from the room, returning minutes later with a now-visible Harry, who made a show of hesitancy at entering a girls' toilet. "Iruka, I believe your student would like to speak to you regarding your most recent Sealing class."

Iruka nodded and greeted Harry, and the two began discussing fuuinjutsu theory, with Filius and Albus soon joining in. Even Moody was visibly listening in, though whether out of interest or paranoia was difficult to tell.

The first to exit their changing area was the Unspeakable, dressed in robes identical to those they were wearing before except in the lack of unidentifiable grime. Madam Bones had brought her outer robes into the booth with her, and emerged wearing them. Finally came Lucius Malfoy, much cleaner than he had been but slightly unkempt, his right shoe far more polished than his left with Dobby fearfully trailing after while attempting to fix this issue. He strode imperiously out the door without even acknowledging the room's other occupants.

The moment the blond wizard was through the door, Harry excused himself and departed as well. Given the familiar look in his student's eye, Iruka also made his excuses and followed after at a discreet distance. He watched as Harry hailed Malfoy, and presented him with the diary, which the man promptly tossed aside to be caught by his elf. Dobby perked up suddenly, and allowed the diary to fall open and reveal a flattened sock hidden between its pages.

Malfoy turned to storm away once more, barking at Dobby to follow, and found to his dismay that he now owned one less house-elf. Iruka was ready to move forward and intervene when Lucius lunged towards Harry as if to throttle him, only to see his third blonde tosspot of the year tumbling through the air. This one, it seemed, had been launched back by a protective elf with the snap of its fingers. When the 'former' Death Eater rose, enraged, he apparently remembered that magic existed and pulled a wand free from his cane.

Now, Iruka intervened. A quick Substitution with a suit of armor behind Malfoy placed the chuunin in a position to dart forward and grab the man's wand hand, forcing his aim to remain towards the ground. "Now now, Mr. Malfoy," he said quietly in a dangerously bright tone, letting his sakki flow out, "you wouldn't be about to attack one of my students, would you? After all, I already promised to protect them, and I never go back on my word, and wouldn't it be such a shame if I had to do something... unfortunate... to you?"

Between the angry house-elf at the top of the stairs, finger still leveled at him, and the strangely frightening scholar gripping his wand hand with surprising strength, Lucius looked like he might need another set of clean robes already. "Forgive my... ill-considered actions," he ground out, "I am afraid that the disappointment regarding the Chamber's contents left me in a poor mood. Why don't you see to your student," he sneered the word like a vile insult, "while I return home to take a much-needed bath." With a nod and a woodenly beatific smile, Iruka released the aristocratic bully and watched him unblinkingly until he had passed out of sight as he only-barely-not-rushed from the castle.

Once he was able to relax, the chuunin turned a gimlet eye on his student. "That's two Naruto plans in three days, Harry. Do you think you could cut back a bit, for the sake of my nerves if nothing else?"

A/N: Sorry, but once I came up with the idea of Umbridge going instead of Fudge, there was no way I could resist the pun.

This chapter fought me. A lot. I repeatedly revised both large and small elements of it, trying to get the characters' behavior to fit both their established personalities and the story. I'd like to hope that the result all flows and makes sense. Also, it didn't exactly give me any good break points until the end there, which resulted in this much longer chapter than normal.

Jake Fairfield is an OC filling a minor role and, unusually, not really based on anybody. His accent is from an English-speaking country outside of the UK. If pressed, I'll say he's Canadian, because the only people that hate Canadians are a-holes and fans of certain American NHL teams. And, apparently, Severus Snape if he thinks they're horning in on his source of rare and exotic potion ingredients, though frankly he fits the first category already.

A fauld is a portion of plate armor, specifically the front portion of the 'skirt' of plates extending down from the breastplate. I just felt like giving this Unspeakable a really obscure term as a codename, dunno why.

"Why didn't they bring a reporter, or at least a photographer, with them?" I hear you asking. Simply put, Lucius and the Batrachian One were hedging their bets. Both hoped that they'd find something down there that they could use to discredit Dumbledore, but Lucius especially was concerned about exactly what might be revealed regarding his involvement. In essence, if they brought a journalist of any type down with them, they wouldn't have as much control over what information got out and how. On top of that, both of them are proud Slytherins, and had to wonder if the contents of the Chamber might paint their founder in an undesirable light - there wouldn't really be much coming back from discovering a collection of the tenth century's equivalent of an Icha Icha collection...

A response to guest reviewer "Arsenal" on the off chance that they are still reading: I acknowledge my pacing issues, it's something I constantly struggle with. As far as the lack of expansive worldbuilding, I'm sorry but this isn't that type of fic. I'm aiming for more of a "for want of a nail" type of story, where a single divergent element (in this case, Iruka's presence) alters the course of events, as much a thought experiment as anything else. Because that's the central premise, I'm keeping everything else as close to canon as possible unless Iruka's presence would have affected it (in which case, I show those effects). As much fun as it would be to flesh out other aspects of magic or the setting in general, it would add further divergent elements and cause the story to lose focus, something that greatly irritates me when other writers do it. If you prefer stories that expand upon the setting and mythos, that's your preference, but my preference (and thus my writing) is on "what if"-type stories, where one fundamental change cascades throughout the story. If the "what if" is "what if magic worked differently?" then these tastes would probably overlap in such a tale, but if it's something different like "what if Harry reacted differently to X" then throwing in a complex expanded system of magic that's inconsistent with the canon takes focus away from the story's main premise in a way I find detrimental (for example, "Dodging Prison and Stealing Witches: Revenge is Best Served Raw"). It's one thing to expand the setting in necessary ways (creating a more complete Goblin culture in "Harry Crow", for example) but if the added worldbuilding isn't directly relevant to the plot it comes across as the writer being distracted by this other shiny idea they had. I have plenty of shiny ideas, but they won't end up in this fic without good reason.

Fic Recommendation: "CSI: Death by Chocolate" by Beth Einspanier - Charlie Bucket is drowned in chocolate at the new Wonka store in Las Vegas. Watch as Grissom and company go down the rabbit hole in their investigation.

Posted 7 October, 2018

Current WIP Chapter: 67

Updated 1 December 2019: Minor grammar fix