2/2

The man was an amazing teacher, and if anyone would be able to put together a detailed training program for us, it would be him.

Maybe also Ebisu, but I had no way of contacting him and he had absolutely no reason to help us.

Hinata read through the program quietly, and about halfway through she stopped and looked up at me. A hopeful smile was on her face. "Th-This looks v-very good. I don't know if I-I can—"

My hands immediately snapped out and I smooshed her cheeks together. "Yes, you can."

Hinata giggled and managed to say, "Okay."

Releasing her, I clapped my hands together and said, "Excellent! You okay to start now?"

Hinata nodded. "I-I, um, will have to tell Father, b-but I'm sure, um, he will be fine w-with extra training. I'll, um, be r-right back."

"Good! Oh, and drop the san for me. We're going to be future besties, right? So just Sakura will do."

She beamed at me.

"You're so adorable," I squealed, causing her panic.

Week Two

Day Six

Kakashi's eyes scanned over each of us that late morning. The three of us were still eating my lunch (Kakashi had yet to eat anything from me. He would, though. I was a stubborn fool), not expecting Kakashi to show up until at least noon.

Kakashi said, "I've decided you guys have earned the right to take your first mission."

"Oh, great," Naruto unenthusiastically said. I might have already told the team that D-Ranks were essentially filled with babysitting, weeding, and running errands. Hinata had mentioned how her team had been stuck on repeating the Tora mission for five days in a row, and I simply couldn't resist seeing Naruto's face when I told him about it. The look of utter disgust was delightful.

You're a bit of an S, hmm.

'This has already been stated.'

"I'd rather keep training, Kakashi-sensei," I put in, smiling up at him and giving him my daily wink.

On the bright side it seemed like Kakashi was starting to become used to my mock flirtations, and would no longer react (he even started politely declining my bento with outlandish excuses that would give Obito a run for his money).

On the down side he was getting used to it and stopped giving me the amusing reactions I so craved.

On the bright, bright side, since he was no longer as angry with me he more easily gave me praise.

"If you want to get cleared to take the more interesting missions, you have to do your fair share of D-Ranks," Kakashi explained.

Sasuke frowned. "How many do we have to do to take a C-Rank?"

"Twenty-one, minimum," he answered.

"Huh. That'll take forever and a day to complete," I mumbled, my brow furrowed. "Why don't we each take a D-Rank and complete it on our own? We should compete to see who can complete the most before we reach our quota. At least make it interesting."

At the prospect of a contest, both boys (naturally) looked interested. Naruto grinned. "Hell, yeah! I bet I'll have finished twenty by the time you guys finish one."

"Hn. Unlikely. You'll probably be the one stuck on one the entire time and I'll have to carry the team."

Kakashi scratched the back of his head. "The point of D-Ranks is to work on teamwork—"

"That's for ordinary teams, though," I said, "and we're clearly not an ordinary team. Naruto and Sasuke show their love for each other," both boys gave disgusted noises, "through competition, and I'm simply so amazing that I get along with everyone."

Kakashi shifted his posture to the back of his heels. "Mm. As long as you take at least three missions together as a team, I'll allow the competition."

"Woo-hoo!" Naruto cheered. "Let's get a C-Rank tomorrow!"

"Idiot, it'll be at least a few days," Sasuke snapped.

"Maybe for you," Naruto retorted.

"We're on the same team, moron."

"Na-uh! Sakura and I are on Team Awesome, and you're on Team Loser with Kakashi-sensei!"

"I want Kakashi-sensei to be on our team, though," I whined, then paused and slowly smiled at Kakashi. "Or maybe we should have our own team, in private."

Kakashi covered his eyes with his right hand, letting out a long sigh.

'Heh-heh-heh.'

You're worse than a pervy old man.

'Thank you.'

Week Three

Day Five

"It's time, Jiji!" Naruto declared, a triumphant grin on his face. "We're ready for our C-Rank, so hand it over!"

Sasuke and I flanked our bundle of sunshine teammate. Sasuke had his arms folded across his chest, whereas I had my hands behind my back so Kakashi could see them.

I now had to always have my hands visible to Kakashi.

It was so worth it, though.

I was immediately hosed down with a low-powered water-dragon afterwards, that knocked me out for the day, but hey.

Worth.

Sarutobi smiled fondly at Naruto, inhaling from his pipe. "Is that so? Kakashi, do you think your team is ready?"

"I suppose so," Kakashi said with a shrug, his single visible eye glancing over to where I kept my hands.

I wiggled my fingers in hello, disappointed he didn't react further than that.

Sarutobi nodded his head. "Very well. I have just the mission for you. Please send in Tazuna."

There was a pregnant pause before the doors opened to the mission room and the old drunk himself entered the room.

'Huh. You know, I kind of thought our first mission might have been something different.'

Plot-no-Jutsu strikes again.

'More like Fate-no-Jutsu.'

Tazuna's face grimaced upon seeing us. "The hell? They're all kids."

"I'll have you know that I merely a flat-chested young woman," I corrected him. Kakashi placed a warning hand on top of my head.

Naruto giggled at me, though (he always found amusement in the ways I could make people squirm, like a true best friend).

Tazuna barked out a laugh at that. "Ha! I am bridge building expert, Tazuna. Once I have returned to my country, I will have you protect my life while I finish the bridge."

"What a coincidence, I had a dream about protecting a bridge builder," I exclaimed. "I dreamed an evil tyrant was hell-bent on destroying the bridge, and so a giant fox, a baby duck, and I had to band together to defend the builder. It had quite the epic battle in it, let me tell you."

Kakashi's grip on my head was starting to become a little uncomfortable.

Tazuna nervously laughed. "Oh? That sounds like quite the crazy dream."

"She's quite the crazy student," Kakashi agreed.

I beamed under the praise.

That was not praise, you praise-whore!

( ｡◕‿‿◕｡)

We had an hour to pack our things and head off with Tazuna. I dropped by the Hyūga residence and left a message for Hinata that I would be gone for a week or so due to our first C-Rank mission. Afterwards, I headed off to one of the shinobi supply stores, intent on purchasing some essentials for the mission.

I wasn't entirely sure what the gosh darn dilly dally heck I would be able to change without ruining the story. I knew it was important for Sasuke to activate his Sharingan (hell, I knew there was no way I would be able to stop Orochi-friggin-maru from coming after us during the exam and I was positive the Hax-Eye-no-Jutsu was essential to our survival). I equally knew Naruto needed to begin his encounters with Kurama.

The fluffy creature of badassery would take a while to Therapy-no-Jutsu, and it had to start somewhere.

Not to mention Naruto had to develop his nindo.

That being said, I really didn't want hotties like Zabuza and Haku to die.

It was quite the pickle, really.

I had begun my iryo-nin training with Hinata five days ago, and had been relatively successful in my endeavours. Once again, I had to take a moment to appreciate Sakura's eidetic memory, and her superb chakra control. She might have had an awful temperament in the beginning, but the girl clearly had talent with chakra.

It was rather sad, actually, that no one took the time to push her to really bring out that talent.

'I won't let it go to waste, though.'

Iryo chakra required precise control in order to conjure, maintain, and control. Unlike standard chakra, iryo chakra could not have any elemental chakras. That was due to the obvious reason of incompatibility for patients. Not every patient could possibly have the same nature as a doctor and of course their body would reject any strange chakra forced inside of them—not unlike how I reacted when chakra entered my system. The best way to circumvent that was for the (future sexy) doctor or (future sexy) nurse to withdraw their own elemental natures from their chakra.

After that point, it was all an understanding of anatomy and practice.

I had done the typical practicing on fish before I moved on to patching up Hinata's bruises and (exceedingly) minor scrapes. It took significant effort on my part, and I knew it would be a while before I got the hang of it enough to become practical in battle.

Unfortunately, I was certainly not skilled enough to save Haku from being stabbed in the heart, or Zabuza from blood loss.

But, I was a dedicated fan girl with a little extra cash and some time to prepare.

My harem had to start somewhere, right?

( ｡◕‿‿◕｡)

I arrived at the front gate, my backpack significantly lighter than what I was used to carrying. Not only because of my intensive physical training, but because Hinata actually gave me a couple of storage scrolls a couple days after we started training.

Knowing how expensive they were, asked her why of course.

She gave me a shy mumble, "W-We're g-going to be besties. I-I, um, don't n-need them a-and you clearly do, so, um… p-please accept th-them as a t-token of my appreciation."

She really shouldn't have been so surprised I would glomp her with glee and start nuzzling her.

If she wasn't getting married to sunshine personified I would have declared us future wives then and there.

Oh well.

Naruto beamed upon seeing me. "Sakura-chan! You were almost late."

I grinned at the hero and slung my arm around his shoulder, pulling him in so I could ruffle his hair. "I would never be late to a mission, silly."

"H-Hey!" Naruto complained, squirming to try and get out from my hair-ruffles. "Come on!"

With a laugh, I let him go. "Sorry your hair is too soft and fluffy to resist."

Naruto pouted. "If it was anyone else, but you I woulda given 'em a beatdown."

"I'm sure," I placated him, then turned to Kakashi. "We good to go?"

"Maa. I suppose so," Kakashi said, glancing around at this three Genin before looking over at Tazuna. "Are you ready, Tazuna?"

Tazuna took a long drink from his bottle of sake before he grimaced and said, "Let's get this over with. Are you really sure these brats are capable of protecting me?"

Kakashi gave his famous one-eyed-crinkled-so-it-looks-like-he's-smiling-but-in-reality-he-might-very-well-be-flipping-you-off-in-his-mind-which-was-so-hot and said, "Don't worry. I'm a Jōnin and I'll be accompanying you. I am more than capable of defending us."

Naruto glowered at Tazuna's remark and looked ready to object—very loudly I might add—so I interrupted him in an attempt to diffuse the situation with my typical humor, "Oh, I know you're more than capable—"

"Okay, going to stop you there, Sakura," Kakashi smoothly said, placing a hand on my head. "Let's get moving."

( ｡◕‿‿◕｡)

Five hours into the walk we arrived at the infamous puddle. I debated on if I should draw attention to it for some extra praise, or let things run its course.

On one hand, I really wanted the praise.

On the other hand, I had a great opportunity to have a little fun. Kakashi undoubtedly already knew there were missing-nin hiding in the puddle. He didn't know that I knew that, though.

With a skip in step I headed over to the puddle. "Hey guys, look! A puddle! Even though it hasn't rained for over a week."

"It's just a stupid puddle," said Naruto, frowning.

"I love splashing in puddles," I told him. "Since it hasn't rained in over a week, I haven't been able to do that."

"If it hasn't rained in over a week, why is a puddle there?" Sasuke asked.

"The Goggle Gods must have blessed me," I answered him sagely. "That is the only explanation."

I then bent over in a great exaggerated show of about to leap inside the puddle before Kakashi intervened with a timely, "Maa, I don't think we should be playing in puddles on a mission."

"But if it's a blessing from the Goggle Gods, I wouldn't want to offend them."

Kakashi stared at me then gave me an eye-smile. "It could also be a test from them to see if you're worthy for the, ah, Rainbow Stick Story."

I gasped. "You're right! Oh no, I don't know what to do now."

"Why don't you—"

Whatever brilliant suggestion Kakashi was about to finish never came because the missing-nin leapt out of the puddle and threw a long chain towards Kakashi. In the blink of an eye I saw the chains wrap around Kakashi and pull him—

I didn't actually see him get pulled apart. I saw the logs immediately replace him, but apparently everyone else around me got to see him be pulled apart because Naruto let out a shout of horror.

'Why—?'

He probably used a genjutsu during canon. Considering how you reacted when he placed you under a genjutsu during the bell test, I doubt he would use that again on you during a live combat situation.

'Oh. That actually makes complete sense.'

I moved quickly to stand in front of Tazuna, a kunai pulled out and my posture shifted to defensive. I was pleased by how I had been able to follow the two generic henchmen with my eyes, when I most certainly would not have been able to at the start of my new life in the Narutoverse.

Naruto had frozen still in utter fear, and the two missing nin lunged towards him. Before Naruto could properly defend himself, Sasuke acted swiftly and threw a kunai towards the men. They separated, one continuing towards Naruto and Sasuke and the other headed straight towards me and Tazuna.

I felt the man's killing intent, and for a brief moment my heart skip a beat.

Adrenaline rushed through me and I felt a keen sense of utter thrill. The very idea of fighting someone always got me tingling in my spars, but now in a life or death situation…

I was positively giddy.

A grin lit up my face and I moved towards the man, kunai in my left hand and a bare fist in my right. Unfortunately for me, though, before he could reach me Kakashi's arm jutted out right before the man and slammed into his neck.

The missing nin retched before passing out, and I couldn't quite hide my disappointment.

Kakashi, entirely at ease, readjusted his grip on the two henchmen that were then unconscious.

'I didn't even notice Kakashi take out the first one.'

Something we'll have to work on.

"Yo," Kakashi greeted, dropping the men to the ground before brushing off his hands on his pants like he had been touching dirt previously. "Sorry for not helping you out sooner, Naruto. I didn't think you wouldn't be able to move."

Naruto flinched, as if Kakashi had told him ramen had become illegal in Konoha.

Kakashi turned towards Sasuke. "You did very well defending your teammate, Sasuke." His lazy eye slid over to me. "Sakura, you went straight towards defending our client per the mission parameters, so good job. I have to ask, though, how you knew they would be in the puddle?"

"Um," came my response as I thought fast, "the Goggle Gods warned me, of course."

Kakashi rubbed the back of his head. "Mn. Sakura you know I know you're chakra-sensitive. You don't have to lie, you aren't in trouble. When you sense people, though, you—"

"Oh, hey, look Naruto's hurt" I quickly said.

'I didn't sense them, though.'

Well. It's hard to sense anything when we feel everything.

'Chakra is everywhere in this world. It's disorienting when I focus on it, so I'd rather not do that.'

Naruto blinked in surprise. "Huh? Oh this thing?"

"They're from Kirigakure," I said, "so they probably have poison on their weapons. I have some standard antidotes in my pack, so hang on."

While I rummaged through my pack for the some antidotes, Kakashi turned to face Tazuna. "Sasuke tie up those missing nin, I need to talk with Tazuna."

Tazuna gulped nervously from Kakashi's obvious undertone of irritation.

Sasuke tied up the henchmen, using rope Kakashi provided while Tazuna began to spill his life story.

I located the antidote and gestured for Naruto to stand beside me. Naruto glumly gave me his hand to examine and I had him swallow the antidotes. Deciding that his cut was minor enough that it would heal on its own, I wrapped a bandage around it after placing some disinfectant on it.

"... so you see, the bridge is our last hope for the people. I'm sorry I lied, I really am, but I'm begging you to please… please help me," Tazuna said, bowing lowly to us.

Kakashi gave a sigh. "This mission is above our parameters. We aren't equipped to handle this. Naruto even was too scared to react properly—"

"I won't be!" Naruto growled, his hands shaking.

Kakashi pointedly looked at said shaking hands.

Naruto shook his head vehemently before pulling out a kunai and then proceeding to stab his right hand that I had just doctored up. I face-palmed at that.

'That shit is not cheap! Damn it.'

In triumph, Naruto held up his now-bleeding-profusely hand that no longer shook. "I can take it. We can do this, Kakashi-sensei. Let's finish this mission through."

Kakashi sighed. "Except now you're going to die from blood loss, so we really have to get back to Konoha."

"… NOOO! No, no, no, no,nononononononnononononoooo. I can't die this way!" Naruto screeched, jumping around, clutching at his hand, and generally spazzing out.

My hand snapped out to grab his injured hand. My tongue clucked in annoyance at having to throw away perfectly good gaz because someone had to make a dramatic point. "Relax. I can heal you."

Kakashi cocked his head at me, and even Sasuke looked over since he had finished tying up the henchmen. "Hmm?"

"I've been training to become an iryo-nin for a while," I told him, placing my hand over the wound and calling forth my chakra. "Textbooks are pretty informative."

"So you've been essentially training on your own?" Kakashi casually inquired.

I nodded my head, carefully transitioning my chakra from the standard pale blue to the calming pale green.

Carefully, and slowly, I stitched Naruto's muscles and skin back together. The wound wasn't deep enough to have damaged any nerves or arteries, but it did strain his cartilage and of course tore his skin.

Finished, I withdrew my hand and beamed in pride at my work. Not a single marr on his skin.

Kakashi let out a low whistle. "That's certainly impressive. It normally takes month under an apprenticeship before acquiring the control to do that."

My cheeks warmed and I giggled in nervous embarrassment from the praise. "Eheheh…"

Praise-whore.

Naruto was amazed. "Wow, Sakura! You really are awesome."

I shuffled my feet and scratched the back of my head sheepishly. "Ah, it's nothing. Tsunade-sama wrote out very detailed instructions, and something like a little scratch is easy to heal."

'Wait until you see what I have planned later.'

"Anyway!" I said loudly, still feeling all warm and happy from Kakashi's praise, "I vote we carry on with the mission. And I feel like Naruto and Sasuke would agree with me on that."

"Hn," grunted Sasuke, not denying his support.

"Of course!" Naruto agreed.

Kakashi chuckled. "Maa. Alright. Let's head out, team."

I'm tired of OCs getting scared. Taking a page from my story, Moratorium, this OC!Sakura is a bit of an adrenaline junkie. Okay, maybe more than a bit.

Answer: Madara, of course. He is the God of Sexiness, with Naruko right behind him.

Question: Quick! Someone from the Narutoverse has to be your permanent bodyguard for all your life because you are in mortal peril (villains and or heroes from other verses are after you). Who is your bodyguard, and who is after you?

Reviews are love!

This is unbeta-d. If you see major grammatical errors / typos let me know. I, personally, am going to bed right now so I may not get to it until tomorrow night after work, but I assure you I will get to them.