Chapter 10: Night of Fire

Within the time frame of those two years, Judith began to join Laila and Iris's study group and the mentor quickly picked up on some subtle differences between the two. Though both were hard-working and studious, Iris flourished in self study homework whilst Judith worked better with face to face tutelage. Iris was much more interested in Arabic and Islam's views on things objectively, often bringing in other religions as a topic too. She pored over books about the religions and was only interested in the Quran for its history and sophisticated Arabic. Judith by contrast was extremely invested in learning all she could about Islam, learning the values and stories and interested in the poetic values of the Quran's verses and their meanings. She asked more questions about the rules and beliefs, always listening patiently to Laila's detailed answer. In turn, Laila made sure to ask them both any question she had to Catholicism, or in Iris's case, other religions. She tended to keep the two sisters' sessions separate, teaching them on different days and times.

Currently, Laila and Iris sat on opposite ends of the bed as Iris flicked through the quran in her hands. She had a loosely wrapped turquoise scarf on and her skin was still moist from the wudhu she had performed prior to this. Laila fiddled with the edge of her jilbab's sleeves, frowning as another plastic diamond popped off. They glittered all over her arms but her constant picking at them meant that half had disappeared. Didn't mean she ever stopped though. Raising an eyebrow, Iris paused on a page.

"Hey ukhti, what does this one say?"

Looking up, Laila looked confused.

"You should be able to read this one."

Still, Iris pushed.

"I'm not too certain. Can you just read it for me?"

Shrugging, she agreed.

"It's only the title… Surahtul Layl. How could you not read this, it's barely two words."

"Al-Layl. Laila. They sound so similar!"

"Oh that's what you meant," Laila laughed, flicking to another page, "my name is vaguely Arabic after all. Here, this one sounds more like it."

She pointed to another one, reading aloud.

" Surah Laylatul Qadr."

Iris's blue irises were wide as she nodded.

"What do they mean?"

"Layl means 'night' so the first one is just titled 'the night'. My name means that too basically. The second one, 'Al-Laylatul Qadr' means 'the night of power'. It speaks of a specific night during Ramadan, that month where I don't drink or eat every day - to fast."

Nodding, Iris edged closer.

"What is the night? When is it?"

Laila shrugged.

"We don't know when exactly, only that it's one of the last ten nights and that it's an odd number. All we know is that on this night, angels descended and revealed the Quran to the Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him. Because of this, worship on this night is rewarded as if it was the constant worship for 1000 months. Sins are forgiven and repentance is accepted-"

"And all you have to do is pray on that night??"

Laila laughed at her enthusiasm and nodded.

"Yep! But because we don't know the exact date, we worship as much as we can on all of the nights and get loads of rewards whether we hit the night or not. Anyway, that's why the words sound similar to my name."

Iris pondered on it for a moment, her eyes shining from behind her brown bangs.

"So your name means Night right?"

"Yep, pretty much."

"Hmmm… and Naar means fire isn't it?"

"Yes…" Laila tilted her head, "why?"

Pressing her fingers to her chin in thought, her sister drummed all the knowledge she had of grammar and beamed when she thought of the result.

"I got it! Laylatun Naar!"

The other looked at her, perplexed.

"Night of Fire? What do you mean by that."

Grinning, Iris winked.

"It's like Cinderella! But much much better, sounds so much cooler."

Blinking, Laila froze at the name that had caused her so much hurt for all these years, the label that had belittled her for most of her life with sisters and a stepmother. The ice that had stung her and encased over her fear melted with the warmth of the new notion of replacing it with Laylatun Naar. She liked the name. It was empowering and endearing to her.

But it wasn't really her.

After a period of silence whilst spacing out, Laila hardly noticed the worried face on Iris's face.

"Did I say something wron-"

"Ah! No, no, it's fine. That's an awesome name, you got the grammar correct and everything."

"But you still seem pretty sad."

"Well uh… it's a great name but it sounds more like a superhero or protagonist of a story would have as a name. I'm fine with just Laila."

Curiously raising an eyebrow, Iris frowned.

"Really? I think it fits you perfectly."

Sharply, Laila tsked and rolled her eyes.

"Really? You must not know me well then."

A flash of hurt slashed across Iris's face causing her too withdraw into herself, quietly commenting.

"Well it isn't like you sure share much about yourself. Me and Judith spill all of our feelings to you but you just keep pretending like you don't have any!"

Laila blinked, anger crossing her face.

"No I DON'T. I tell you guys how I feel all the time!"

"Now that's rich," Iris scoffed, "you only tell us your feelings when you complain or in response to us! You NEVER initiate those kind of things!"

"What… you guys never have the time to listen to me!"

"What do you mean by that, what do you think we spend this ENTIRE HOUR doing? It's all just listening to you talk and talk!"

"Hey, you chose that one. You are NOT bringing in your OWN IDEA into this."

"It may have been my idea but you could have used it to let us know you better!! I try to open up topics all the time but you just write it off as small talk and tell me to focus! How are we meant to know you?"

"I dunno?? Talk to me outside of a time when we're meant to be LEARNING?? I have loads of time and I'm always in the house. Unlike you two who are allowed to go out other than for groceries."

"WHEN! You're always doing some chores halfway across the house!"

"Are you blaming me for something YOUR MOTHER sets me up to?"

"No I'm blaming you for not even trying to look for us! How are we even meant to know it's you, huh?? You always wear that stupid veil and sometimes I can't even tell if it's you I'm looking at or what kind of expression you're making!"

Iris stopped immediately at the widening of Laila's eyes. Even with the last point she'd just made, she could instantly feel her sister freeze up in horror and guilt crawled up her back like cockroaches skittering up her spine. Tears welled up in the dark eyes but the glare she gave Iris was colder than a glacier of them.

"Well. The reason I still wear it around you two is because I still feel unsafe."

Getting up, she swiped the Quran from Iris's hands and stomped out the door, rage flaring out of her eyes as regret caught up with the other. Iris sat on her bed, crying her eyes out. Droplets of water slipped down her cheeks and stained her blanket in little splashes.

She didn't mean what she had said in the heat of the moment. Laila hadn't meant what she had said either...right?