20: Dancing Daffodils

...

"Hey!"

I looked up and saw Matthew's glowing face.

He sat beside me and joined me watch the dancing daffodils in the beautiful garden before us.

"What are these?" He traced the dark circles around my eyes.

"Beats me." I changed the way I sit and prodded my chin over my knees. "I haven't had any sleep since I saw the archive of my most embarrassing videos."

Flashes from those clips still kept bogging my mind. I couldn't shake them off.

For some reason, those videos almost made me hate my past self, for real. Like I would have wanted to deny that it was never me. Like it was a totally different person. Like it never happened at all!

Marcus left me right after the last video stopped playing. He simply said that he should leave me so I could catch some Zzzs and restore my energy.

But hell! I couldn't even take a short nap!

I tried closing my eyes but all I can see were those videos and photos reminding how stupid I was.

He didn't give me any disclaimer before he pressed the play button and let me drown in my good old embarrassing memories.

Those videos were bombs!

I felt attacked again.

And he left without saying anything after.

Like he left me there just like that.

He didn't even give me any single explanation.

I got all these crazy thoughts and questions inside my head and he just left me all alone, inside my room wondering if I should still live for another day.

My God!

I never imagined I could do all those things!

And all because of a man.

A stubborn, cold-hearted, apathetic, narcissistic Marcus Hughes!

I stared at the ceiling until I don't know what time it was when I noticed the morning lights peek through my window.

I waited and waited but he never returned.

It made me sad. Somehow, I felt a genuine prickle in my heart that he made me wait for him again.

It was hopeless so I left my room and walked aimlessly.

The last thing I knew, I was there in that garden, surrounded by these fresh blooms of beautiful yellow daffodils.

The sunshine was still new and the morning breeze was fresh so I decided to stay.

I better clear off my mind.

I was getting crazier as time went by.

Then Matthew found me.

"I didn't expect Marcus would let you watch those videos this early." He looked rather surprised.

"He wants to torture me, that's all."

"He wants you to remember him."

"I hate him more for that!" I squealed.

"Because you finally realized how madly, truly, deeply in love you are to Marcus?"

I rolled my eyes and pouted.

"Don't even start me on that, please."

"What? Aren't you proud of yourself? You made something out of yourself after years and years of stalking, following and loving him. The unstoppable, resolved, never say never, and go-getter Lady Ruth Hamilton finally snatched the great Marcus Andrew Hughes' elusive and untamed heart. Bonus even! He made you his wife."

"That's totally cheap, crazy, and cheesy, Matt."

He laughed mockingly.

"Which reminds me of someone I know who was so engrossed and focused on her goals she personified those three adjectives perfectly."

He gave me a meaningful sideway glance.

I pinched the side of his waist.

He groaned.

"You brat!"

"I hate you too!"

"You never hated me." He said with a serious tone.

"Yeah. I think so too."

Somehow, I couldn't disagree to his statement.

Matthew tapped my shoulder and gave me his signature warm assuring smile.

"I know it's kinda complex and weird but don't beat yourself too hard. You'll get those memories back, Ruth. I'm sure you'll come around soon."

"What if I don't?"

He turned to me with a questioning gaze.

"What if I don't want to remember the 'me' I was ten years ago? What if I don't feel the same way anymore? What if I realized that I was just crazy and young and mad but then I don't really like Marcus after all?"

He let out a deep sigh and laid down on his back against the moist and fresh bed of grass. He put his one arm behind his head and watched the slow-moving clouds on the sky above us.

I mimicked him. I grabbed his free arm and used it as my human pillow. I looked at the sky but my mind was definitely some place far from where we are.

I felt it was just a natural thing between us.

"Maybe I changed." I said after a few moments of silence.

"You just forgot."

"No." I placed my arm over my temple.

"You can never imagine how emotionally discouraging, mentally torturing and nerve wracking it was to me watching all those old videos and photo compilations. And mind taking note that my estranged husband, which happens to be your only and twin brother, didn't bother explaining any of those stuff at all to me."

"How could fate played with my life and had it turn a full 360 degrees within 24 hours? I was totally dragged out from living as a quiet single independent woman to a married woman who used to be a rich brat teenager, a crazy fan girl, a notorious stalker, and now a questionable runaway wife. Is there anyone here that could beat me at that?" She continued.

"I know it's hard to take in. But relax. We have all the time to fix it."

My eyebrows furrowed.

"Fix it? What if I don't want it to get fixed?"

"It's overwhelming. But I know you. You don't run away from challenges."

I smirked. "Like how? I was just tagged as your brother's runaway wife, remember?"

"You didn't choose that path, though. As I've said, I know you. Not even a single second for the past decade that you ever wanted to stay away from my brother. You stick around him like you're a tenacious glue or something. You couldn't just get away. We tried but we failed."

I rose up and turned straight to his face.

"You're saying?"

He pressed his lips.

"I should let my brother tell you about it."

"Matthew!"

He smiled again. It was a bitter smile, though. It didn't reach his eyes like his usual smiles this time.

His expression made me more curious.

"Spill it out, will you?" I demanded.

He didn't respond. He then rose up and pulled me up by my arms.

"You shouldn't be walking around here while you're still on your PJs, milady."

I followed his weird gaze and ended up looking at my clothes.

"Oh?" I was suddenly embarrassed.

As I was so deep in my thought, I forgot changing clothes from my pajamas.

How far have I gone to from my bedroom?

My black underwear was very visible as my PJs were made of silk and was so thin.

"That's why I thought of bringing you this." He took something from his back.

Matthew draped the brown robe around me and tied its sash around my waist.

"I don't want to scandalize our servants seeing you walking around here half-naked." He poked my nose. "That's not so lady-like, you know?" His warm smile was back.

I blushed and covered my face.

"Should I hate you too or thank you for saving me this time?"

He gently pinched my cheeks.

"What do you want for breakfast, Ruthie?"