Chapter 7

Screaming, I shot up in my bed. It had only been a night-mare. I looked over at my clock, reading 2:30am. Wiping the sweat off of my forehead, I got out of the covers and trudged down to the kitchen for a glass of water.

When I got there, I noticed that my dad had left his laptop open on the counter. He didn't usually do that, so I assumed he had worked late, and was so tired that he forgot about it. Right as I was about to close the computer, I noticed something. There was an E-mail from a man named Clide Gervin. My dad usually communicated with people through phone calls and text messages. I had never seen or heard of him using something as old and out-dated as Gmail. Before I could look at what the message said, I heard footsteps. I instantly left the computer there and ran over to a cupboard, trying to act like I'd been deciding which glass to use. When the footsteps stopped, I looked over and saw my mom. She looked exhausted.

"Oh, hey honey. What are you doing up so late?" She asked me as she stepped into the kitchen.

"I just had a bad dream and it woke me up, so I came down to get a glass of water."

"Oh ok, that's fine. Just remember you do have school in the morning, and I wouldn't want you missing something important in class because you're feeling fatigued." My mother explained as I sipped my drink.

"I know, I'll get enough sleep." I told her.

She smiled and kissed my forehead. Then, my mom disappeared into the hallway.

The rest of the night was terrible. I couldn't sleep, so I just tossed and turned in my bed for a couple of hours. Around 5:00 am, I decided it was hopeless to keep trying, so I grabbed my phone. I saw that there was an End of Summer party happening, and I hadn't even heard about it. From the posts on social media, it looked like everybody from my school had been invited, except for me. It shouldn't have gotten to me, but it did. The painful truth had finally hit me, like a rock to a windshield, that everything I had known for the past three years was fake.

I quickly shut my phone off, and set it face down on the bedside table. Jumping out of bed, I stepped into my bathroom to wash my face, throw my hair up in a bun, brush my teeth, and take a cold shower. Under the freezing water, I thought about the past couple of days. I had lost my friends, my social status, really my entire life. And, it was all because I had decided to use the MODIFIER.

I began weighing the pros and cons of changing back, when I realized that I would never be accepted again, no matter what I did. The people in my town had only held onto me because my family and I were the ones who had started the whole thing. Feeling a shiver creep through my body, I turned off the water and wrapped myself in my cozy bath robe. I walked into my closet, and looked at all the shelves. I asked myself, "What does someone wear when they have nobody to impress, no one to make jealous, and no reason to go to school, other than getting a good education?"

That was when it hit me. I was free! When I had been invited into the popular group, there were so many limitations on how I dressed, spoke, and acted. Now, I could do whatever I wanted! I grabbed a black t-shirt and some ripped skinny jeans. Throwing my hair into a messy bun, I put on my glasses that I had hidden from everyone, and some high-top converse. It was only 6:15 at that point, so I grabbed my lap-top, and worked ahead on school assignments for the next hour.

When I got done, I was proud of what I had gotten done. I shut my computer, stuffed it into my bag, and headed downstairs for breakfast. "Hey Mom, hey Dad!" I said, and grabbed a pancake and some bacon. "Thanks for breakfast!" And with that, I was out the door. For the first time in what felt like forever, I felt liberated! I didn't care what looks would be thrown in my direction, or what kinds of notes would be slipped into my locker. When I got to the school, I confidently strode inside.

That confidence faded quickly, however. A few hours in, I didn't know how much longer I could hold my ground. I had thought I would be able to stay feeling good about myself and not caring about what others thought of me. The problem was that I was so used to shaping my life to the way everybody else wanted, that I now had to re-teach myself how not to care. As the day continued, the message became loud and clear that I was no longer wanted in the school. If nothing else, I thought I would be able to turn to my teachers, because I was a perfect student, with my grades and extracurriculars. However, even they were treating me like the scum of the Earth.

After 5th hour, I walked over to my locker and what was inside made my stomach churn in repulse. There was a bloody, dead rat with a note beside it that said,

"From this day on, you are banned

Not just from school, but all the land.

If you think to stay, better think twice

Cause every day, we'll get less nice."

I felt the wall behind my eyes that I had built up over the past few years begin to crack. Knowing that tears would appear any second, I grabbed my stuff and ran out one of the exits. I knew that nobody would be at home, but I ran all the way there anyway. When I got to my house, I went straight to my room. I threw my school stuff out of my bag, knowing that I would need the room for other things that I would need to survive on my own for possibly a long period of time. Grabbing a t-shirt and some leggings, I stuffed them and my laptop into my back-pack. I ran downstairs and packed some granola bars, fruit snacks, a water bottle, a small blanket, and some cash.

Before I walked out the door, I noticed my dad's laptop sitting on the table from the night before. Curiosity got the best of me, so I opened it and backed all the information on it up to my computer. I had always been pretty tech-savvy. Then, wiping a tear from my cheek, I wrote a vague note to my family, telling them I loved them so much and to not worry about me. And with that, I walked out the front door.