Bad Feelings, Emptiness, and a Healthy Dose of Insomnia

POV Change - Kars

As I sat, holding Kara...I felt nothing but emptiness, and a blaring pain even trying to deprive me of that. I just felt numb. Like I wasn't really there in that room. It was like a sort of outer body experience where I wasn't even in my own body any more.

It was horrible.

The feeling brought on by the news that my race was nearing it's official end...was horrible. Despite my numbness, I still felt the girl holding me break down crying herself. I hugged her tighter, both to relieve myself of this loneliness inside of me and the loneliness I knew was no doubt inside her as well.

We were both part of an endangered species after all.

Nothing comes close to the loneliness brought on by such a fact. It was hollowing.

In the end, I just sobbed away, feeling the pain cutting me deeper the more I thought about it. Kara was...wonderfully patient with me. She'd just met a soldier from her planet and yet here he was, crying his eyes out. I should be ashamed of myself as a soldier. But as a Kryptonian, I could do nothing but grieve.

Her slender arms and small frame gave me a reassurance that felt like those dainty shoulders of hers were holding up the weight of the world for me. It gave me a small, albeit very needed, respite. One I would be very thankful for in the days to come.

Breaking away from her, I gave a self-deprecating smile as I shakily stood up, "I'm sorry for showing you such an unsightly sight," I apologize and she instantly shook her head, her slender hand placed on my arm as a show of courage.

"Don't apologize. I was much worse, I'll have you know," she smiled, obviously trying to cheer me up.

But...it didn't work. Every bit of cheer poured into me just fell into the emptiness and festered.

Even if it did nothing for me, I still smiled politely but from her look of pity, I knew the smile on my face was probably weak and shaky at best. Sighing, I motioned to Diana, the woman who first met me after the fall, "Could either of you get me a room to sleep in? I'm...awfully tired," I said, not being able to stop a second sigh from escaping my lips.

Luckily Diana was holding her Lasso, as she called it, and she heard and understood what I said. She stood up with a very motherly smile before nodding, "Of course. We have plenty of rooms for you to rest in, Kars," she said before motioning me to follow.

Giving the best grateful smile I currently could, I moved to follow Diana but Kara's hand gently grabbing my wrist stopped me. She looked up at me, her sapphire blue eyes looking like two deep blue suns as they looked up at me with a worried light, "If you need anything, Kars - ANYTHING - please just call for me. I'll help in anyway I can," she said with sincerity that made me feel choked with emotion brought on by my current feelings of despair and pain and she carried on, "I know what it feels like to lose Krypton. I will help you through this."

I just smiled and nodded at her and she reluctantly let go of my wrist, "Thank you, Kara. I will keep it in mind," I finished before walking away and following Diana.

I just wanted to lie down and sleep. I just wanted to dream and forget about these feelings.

I just wanted to forget.

Thankfully, Diana chose to keep quiet and give me some time to think, so I didn't need to keep up a facade of politeness. I could do it for Kara because she knew how I felt and she was one of the last members of my race. But as nice as Diana was, she wasn't a Kryptonian. She had no idea on the pain I was feeling. I was one of the last few surivors of a race-wiping event.

It didn't take long for me to get to the room and after bidding Diana goodbye, I entered the room and collapsed onto the bed. Closing my eyes, I forced myself to fall asleep like all Kryptonian soldiers could.

And I just forgot about my feelings of despair for a moment. A single moment free of the pain.

Then the dreams began. More like nightmares.

. . .

POV Change - Kara Zor-El

Sighing, I collapsed into the chair as I thought back to Kars. I was just about to tell him about our race practically dying out...and yet I was looking over his body like some kind of thirsty cat? God, I'm sick in the head.

I pinched my arm, cursing myself for my thoughts before I heard the door slide open to reveal Diana who saw what I was doing then gave a mischievous smirk you wouldn't expect to see on someone her age.

"You don't have to beat yourself up over your thoughts. Even I could see his appeal - he was a very handsome individual. Also given the fact he's a Kryptonian I'm sure you feel a natural chemistry to him," she teased and I stood up, trying to cover my embarrassment with anger.

"Diana!" I gave a hushed yell, giving her a red-faced glare, "For him, he's just lost his entire world! His entire race! Now isn't the time to talk about how hot he is!" I gnashed my teeth, feeling my face continue to burn as involuntary thoughts of his muscular figure popped back into my head. Diana just smirked at what I said, lifting a finger to refute me.

"I said handsome, not hot, Kara," she retorted and I groaned in frustration before stomping toward her, the floor actually shaking under my steps. Making me stop and look down at my feet - why was I using so much strength. Diana saw the same thing and just chuckled, "Whenever you get excited or emotional you use more of your strength. You're a thousand years too early to try and hide things from me missy," she spoke in a maternal tone that made me remember my own mother, especially after just having talked to Kars about Krypton's destruction.

My mood slightly ruined, I was about to answer when an alert rang throughout the HQ.

[ID's Recognized as Superman and Batman, Entering Justice League HQ!] the machine used for calling out arrivals and departures called out Kal's alter ego and Kal's best friend's alter ego. Though of course I didn't know Batman's real name.

He lined the inside of his mask with a special kind of lead that stopped me from snooping a look at his face secretly, as well.

Turning to Diana I smiled slightly smugly at how conveniently I'd been saved before moving passed her and toward the teleports entry. Though I did hear Diana say goodbye with a teasing tone, I just ignored it and rushed to Kal. Which didn't take long.

Seeing my tall and broad cousin, I smiled before rushing to hug him, "Kal, we aren't alone!" I blitzed him, speaking a mile a minute to which Kal just froze before grabbing my shoulders and holding me at an arm's length.

"You mean...?" he asked, his voice nothing but a whisper. Though I heard him loud and clear, and gave him an excited nod.

"Yes! He's a Kryptonian!" I said, my earlier feelings of gloom washed away by the hope and warmth of finding another Kryptonian. Three is better than two, and who knows, we might find more Kryptonians! Kars might not have been the only one to get transported.

Kal's face lit up in a bright smile, her cerulean blue eyes looking around, as if searching for Kars with his X-Ray vision. Though his impatience seemed to take importance as he continued speaking as he searched, "Where is he? Is he injured or anything? How did he get to Earth?" he listed off with similar enthusiasm to me which made me smile.

He may have grown up on Earth but Kal still feels excited when the subject inclused Krypton and other Kryptonians.

But hearing his question, I furrowed my brows before giving an awkward look to Kal, "He's...sleeping. Something weird is going on. Kars--His name," I clarified, "Seems to be under the impression that Krypton being destroyed...happened today. Not 36 years ago like it actually was. I'm quite sure he was in a similar incident to me and that he was frozen in cryogenic sleep until recently," I said with a sigh, feeling nothing but sympathy for Kars as I knew exactly what his situation felt like.

Kal just stopped before lifting a hand to his chin, "Now that is a problem...how did he take the news?" he asked with a saddened look, obviously feeling for Kars.

But in the heat of the situation, I just rolled my eyes, "How do you think he took it, Kal? He was distraught, in despair. He'll no doubt need our help if he's to get through this," I said with a slightly biting tone, to which Kal raised his hand in surrender.

"You're right, you're right. I wasn't thinking," Kal said with a tired sigh which confused me.

"Are you okay, Kal?" I asked, an eyebrow raised. He instantly stood to attention like a cat that had had it's tail stepped on.

"I'm fine, Kara. Just...personal stuff," he suspiciously said, making me jot down in my mind to figure out what was going on with Kal. But for now, helping Kars would have to be on the top of my priorities.

Against what I thought possible, I realized Batman had walked past me impossibly quietly and I flashed in front of him with narrowed eyes, "Where are you going, Batman?" I asked, trying to intimidate the man if he was going to do what I thought he was going to do. Which he was as he instantly admitted.

"I'm going to question this Kryptonian. There are too many holes in his story and we need answers," he said, his voice gruff and indifferent, filled with rationale and nothing else.

But his answer just ticked me off.

"No, you will not be doing that!" I gave a yell, spreading my arms out and blocking his path, "He's just got to sleep! And he's just been through an unimaginable amount of trauma! He won't want to answer questions after what he's experienced today! At least wait until he's rested enough, please," I pleaded, knowing intimidation wasn't going to work after my outburst barely got an eyebrow raise from the man.

"What he's allegedly experienced, Supergirl. Allegedly. Nothing has been proven yet, and I plan to correct that and get the answers we need. We can't have another General Zod on Earth. I'm sure you understand," he said with such a subtle sharpness that I wouldn't have noticed any other time.

But right now I did and it really pissed me off.

I grabbed the parts of his cape that covered his shoulder and hoisted him off the ground as my face morphed into a snarl of anger, "He did NOT fake any of his reactions! How dare you even try to insinuate that!" I yelled and I instantly felt Kal come up behind me and begin to pry my hands off of Batman's cape.

I knew my actions would do nothing for Kars' innocence...but these two hadn't seen the pain. The despair and emptiness in his eyes. The fact people would ever doubt him just didn't even appeal to me. Not even for a second.

"It's alright, Kara," I heard Kars' deep voice coming from deeper down the hall and I spun to look at him.

"I thought you were asleep, Kars," I replied in Kryptonian, speaking with genuine worry - I'd seen how tired he was when he left earlier, "How come you're here?"

"You were all being quite loud, you know?" he said and I went to apologize, feeling terrible, when he gave a weak laugh and a shaky smile that made me want to hug him and tell him it would be okay, "Don't worry. I was awake when you started shouting, Kara," he said and I felt my face heat up in embarrassment and he continued, "I can't understand this planet's language but I can tell when I'm being suspected of lying. Tell him I'll answer any doubts he has."

"Kars, you don't need--" he stopped me with a bright and gentle smile that I didn't think he'd be capable of right now. As bad as it made me feel, I couldn't stop my brain from turning to mush as I looked at that smile.

I don't know what part it was but something was just too intoxicating to me.

I was like a moth being drawn to a gentle flame.

"I'm fine with it, Kara. I know that this sort of thing needs to be done," he smiled before beginning to walk closer to us, "Kars," he greeted as he arrived in front of Kal. I let go of Batman, so Kal let go of the hands he was trying to pry off of his friend. Kal turned to Kars and looked a little surprised at the size of him.

He was quite big. But still compact and spread evenly enough that he didn't look too big.

"Kal-el, it's good to meet you, Kars," my cousin replied, grasping Kars' forearm in greeting.