War cape

─ Hi, Lawli.

A punch.

A very strong punch of all fears, frustrations, adrenaline, anxiety. Signs so sudden that they affected him physically.

And all of just two hoarse words that came after you.

All muscles tightened. And all the bones softened. A chill went up his spine and spread over his body, freezing his mind, making him unable to take any action. He stood still, statue.

─ Welcome back. ─ Beyond said, much later. He took a step forward, closer to the wheelchair, but still considerably far. Lawliet, with his eyes trained on the moldy corner of the walls, could almost feel the sting of someone else's gaze on his back.

No one else said anything, for an almost eternal time.

It was not known to wait.

─ Lawli, can you turn? ─ he did, but with the tone of someone who asks.

The words came in, and the British brain recognized them. L ordered his body to move, but he did not obey. Was it really humanly possible to stay in that state just for fear?

And with every thousandth, it became more dangerous not to fulfill the brother's wishes.

But I wasn't doing it on purpose

─ Lawliet, turn around. ─ Now, his timbre was pure authority.

However, this does not mean that with this, L's current state has improved, or that his motor skills have not been restored. Nothing cooperated to this end.

The time Birthday waited was three seconds.

─ I told you to turn around! He didn't shout, but he said it out loud. He himself took charge of turning the other's wheelchair towards him. Eye contact was inevitable and instant. The two arms of the red-eyed one continued around the chair. They were in dangerous proximity.

But Beyond moved away millimeter. It did not divert its orbs from the other moment. He analyzed it when the distance allowed a panoramic spectrum of the wheelchair ahead.

And your expression. The highlight of all the clues to know which personality predominates in the twin's confused mind. Mouth still, eyebrows too. "Calm" eyes.

Without many tips this time.

She looked at him for a long time, without mention of the word or movement. And so they did, even when Lawliet mustered a little courage to deflect the mite that was nailed to him.

L's reactions were negligible. He just couldn't do anything. He stood there, without reacting, talking, doing anything that at least gives him a little dignity.

No, he waits instead. He awaits his punishment like a frightened child. A frightened cat in the middle of the street who was caught by a mean brat, who wants to torture him until he meows begging for death. It would be so much better if his voice flowed, that he could try to talk, try to calm him down.

However, his vocal cords had stayed somewhere along the way.

A hand went over his face. Extremely cold. He almost felt the lemon cake go through the larynx and come back. He held his lower jaw, weakly. Beyond guided him again to face-to-face contact.

The twin's serious eyes suddenly smiled.

─ I'm glad you're okay. ─ the same hand moved until a strand of hair was pushed away from the wheelchair behind his ear. Then his other hand joined the movement, holding the sides of his brotherly face. Beyond he ran his fingers along the twin features of hers. She looked at him deeply, still with a small smile on the corner of her lips.

Birthday was completely incomprehensible. Cataloging their attitudes was literally impossible. He had divergent reactions with similar, if not the same, situations. Aggressiveness and harmony went hand in hand, fighting for dominance in an endless fight that showed in the British personality.

Or British bipolarity.

With slow gestures, he crouched down to the height necessary to equalize the two heads. The lack of distance made L's symptoms worse. I wanted to scream for help, if that were the case. I wanted someone to find it, get it out of there.

He was so helpless that he was more disgusted with himself than afraid of the other.

Her brother, now kneeling, made space between his legs and fit in the middle. He was a few inches shorter because of the height of the chair.

What was most frightening now was the kindness that Beyond exhibited. Their expressions and their actions, although serious, were totally calm. It didn't look like anything had happened. As if the memories of spending a night out, talking to a strange boy on the phone, running the entire city were erased from his memory.

Really, the only thing she identified in her brother was a growing desire to touch him.

He pulled L to himself, kissing his lips with all the delicacy he had. It merely leaned in fact. It was more of a brief touch. Birthday did not move away, the minimum space between them was maintained. The arms wrapped around his waist, and held him as they hold a fragile glass that is not resistant to any pressure.

Beyond left his head on L.'s stomach.

He rested there, in the silence. Listening to the other's heartbeat and breathing. Up and down, filling and emptying your lungs with air.

Beyond needed this.

I needed him.

. The guarantee of having it forever was so certain.

Where did this unexpected hitch come from?

He had a perfect plan. Calculated at all points, with no margin or chance of error. The problem was with freedom. Something that I had given Lawliet a lot in the last few months. That was the peak of everything. The reason for the facts to get off track.

Let's face it, L had slept outside the house.

And that means that anything could have happened. He could have gone anywhere. State with anyone. Like, for example, that kid on the phone.

Oh, there was still that little detail.

The possibilities of what had happened in the past twenty-four hours had boiled his blood again. Thinking about who that boy was and what he might have done piqued the worst parts of his heart. And as from water to wine, he broke the tranquility that took him to see that, at least, Lawliet was safe at home.

His blood didn't just boil - it bubbled.

Beyond would never again slip up like that.

─ What happened to you? He whispered, almost internally. He raised his face.

─ What do you have in mind ?! He shouted, getting up so abruptly that the wheelchair moved back. ─ Answer, Lawliet!

Clearly, there was no answer.

Birthday took a breath. Many, many times. He massaged his temples and only turned his attention to the wheelchair when there were no changes in his chest.

"Time to feed the inner lions"

─ Beyond. ─ L spoke up, his voice so shaky it was better not to have. ─ You need to calm down ...

The one who was standing looked at him quickly. It was concluded that there was no other choice.

─ Know. ─ cut it off. ─ You asked for it.

She took him in her arms, just enough to get him out of his way of walking.

He walked a few steps, to the middle of the room. It didn't take long for L to feel his entire body hitting the floor. He had played it, still standing.

Lawliet made a small growl at every impact on his head, where he put his hand on instinct. It wasn't bleeding.

The standing Brit looked at him from above. With one of his feet, he turned it over until it was on its back.

─ It is your fault. - rigid voice, devoid of pity.

A kick in the side of the hip. His fingers might even have been bare, but the strength he imposed invalidated that fact.

A moderate cry came out of English. It hurt, it hurt everywhere. Even the untouched seemed to throb. Maybe it was the desperation to know that it was just beginning

─ Only yours. - spoke again, murmuring.

It was for Lawli's sake. Everything he did was just for his own good. I didn't like hitting him, or seeing him lying on the floor, howling in pain. This was also torture for him. She loved Lawliet, and that was why it was so necessary to make him learn his position. That way I could protect you, that way I would have you forever with you.

No one would be able to interfere with that.

Not even the boy Lawliet talked to as soon as he got home.

Yes, Beyond had seen his brother's expressions. He smiled as he rarely saw, looking at the screen of that damn cell phone. That damn smile that L never gave him.

He aimed his eyes at the body below him. He still moaned low, clinging to himself, in an almost fetal position.

God, what a desire she had to embrace him.

But it should be impartial. After all, I was in the middle of a punishment. And there was still anger inside.

─ We could have avoided all of this! He shouted, with one more kick. Right in the back. Size was the impact that took the boy ten centimeters ahead.

The howl was instinctive, loud.

─ If only you could make things easier. ─ He lifted him by the collar of his shirt, just enough to deliver one last, sure punch. That one threw him away, and pulled some blood out of his nose. L just didn't roll over because of the wall, which was in charge of stopping it.

He had reached a stage where physical pain is no different from pure emotional terror.

He had known the boogeyman since he was little. It was his twin brother.

─ Stop this, please. He hissed as clearly as possible, feeling, as soon as he opened his mouth, a liquid breaking the gravitational force and rising up his throat. He vowed to be eaten, but it was blood. He immediately gulfed the not-so-small amount expelled, forcing himself to cough. Coughing made your spine creak

The dark-eyed brunette watched the pain close to him. Apparently relentless, with that stiffness in his eyes, almost capable of freezing the hottest heart. Also keeping his whole body tight, bathing with indifference in the pleas that the other threw at him.

Make no mistake, that was just a cover. He wore it because it was necessary, and now, more than ever. Acts like that would make Lawliet learn, and bruises and scars would always remind him of a lesson

it should have been stuck in your mind for a long time: L Lawliet was from Beyond Birthday.

She let him pull himself together. And only when the moaning had practically stopped did L's twin have the impulse to do the rest of the work. I had to search it. Check if your body was as it always was. Search for evidence of crime.

Because if there was a small mark that was not made by Beyond, someone would die.

Of course, Birthday remembered everything he left in Lawliet. All the memories of all the times he had him were the freshest and clearest things he had in mind. Every detail, reaction, smell. Everything was sewn into itself. Even the volume and the sonority of his groans were kept there, or even the fraternal countenance when he was about to succumb were recorded.

He remembered this with such perceptibility simply because those memories aroused a feeling that few things remind him of; the feeling of life running through your veins.

These factors, therefore, explain why a mere thought of someone else's hands touching your Lawli was enough to get you out of your mind. Who does anyone think it is to take something that belongs only to him?

He stood over his brother, hunched over. He held his wrists above his head.

─ Look at me. He ordered. It was obeyed, albeit slowly.

L's orbs, formerly black, were now only dread color.

─ I'm not going to hit you. Tell me what happened.

He crouched down just below the twin's abdomen. He dictated his words slowly, making sure the other one understood perfectly. Birthday yearned for the answer. He mainly yearned to know the motivation of the other to practice such an act, but mainly, he demanded to know every minute of his brother's last night. I would hear every detail, memorize each name.

For that was the height of his carelessness.

Patiently, he saw the fraternal lips move, formulating words without sound. L chose what to say, minutely. The wheelchair user still had this self-control, this care for himself.

For being with B was like sinking into the open sea with heavy anchors attached to you by ropes on your heel. They pull you down, no matter how well you swim or how hard you struggle to climb. The only way to avoid death is to undo the knots that surround your feet, to swim freely. And these knots are not simple, and you need to breathe soon. Basically, it is a deadly game where the lack of concentration is fatal.

Now, this concentration to carry out the minute undoing knots is called telling the truth. Not naked and raw. No absolute things. No telling about possible kisses and nights of sleep with a certain Japanese. Obviously not.

But he would tell the main reason for his non-return home: Beyond himself.

For Lawliet was absolutely fed up. And his spine still hurt. He hesitated before speaking.

─ I didn't want to go back. I didn't know it would happen to me when I got home. ─ quietly, the syllables came together.

He felt mediocrally proud of himself for finishing an entire sentence without stuttering. Even though his position showed apparent fear (which he did feel) and his whole gaze was at any point where his brother was not, and even though Birthday's psychology was not going to obey in any predictable logic, Lawliet had stupid optimism within him. .

He got this bad habit from some time ago; keep a little hope even when you're in the shit. Think of the best case, or that maybe the situation will magically come out of the pit just because you believed it.

Pure illusion.

Light Yagami's fault.

I was deluded by him.

Anyway, it doesn't matter. For the moment, that was what gave him the strength to respond. It was thinking about Light that still comforted him a little.

The image of him in her brain brought a fictional peace. Possibly due to the lack of things / people to get attached to. That, of course, was also a hypothesis. Anyway, it is irrelevant now.

He peered past Beyond, just to see his expression. He did not seem to understand what was said. It may have been that he spoke too softly. That disturbing silence sped up the British heart again. This kind of moment was dangerous, because it is when Birthday's mind works alone that the verdict of what will happen to L comes up.

Although it could be anything. Any of them. As long as it wasn't an outbreak. Anything but that. Now that he remembered that possibility, the astonishment about L grew instantly like some magical tree in the movies. His pains seemed to intensify with just that damned thought. The pupils flinched, startled. He was being a coward, but his body gave him no decent alternative.

An outbreak now would make him sink to the anchors.

─ What are you talking about? ─ the twin's physiognomy gradually became disbelief. As if he now understood the previous speech. Yes, there was no other explanation. Lawlie

I wasn't afraid of him.

Fear. His.

Why?

If ever everything he did in the last few years was for his own good?

It is true. Every thought, every miserable action was strictly planned for Lawliet's sake.

No, not just that; Beyond's entire life was dedicated to that ungrateful one. Protecting him has always been his priority.

Birthday laughed.

Does L know what he had to go through? To sustain that heavy and expensive medication routine without the help of anything but a rotten allowance that Watari sent. The whole process of taking him to Japan in search of the most specific treatment, facing all kinds of things and all kinds of people. Death threat there, another stab here, loans with debts that until today have not been paid.

Beyond did things he would never do for anyone else, not even for himself. Truculent acts; dirty, if not putrid, and this to keep your brother breathing.

And I would do it again, as many times as needed. Even if he never acknowledged his effort or repudiated him with all his might, Birthday would still kill and die for him.

Because Beyond loved him insanely. Literally crazy about Lawliet.

Although, it had its limitations there. Some silly demands that the red-eyed owner vindicated in exchange for all his devotion.

Little things;

I just wanted exclusivity. For all aspects, physical or emotional, Beyond just wanted exclusivity.

Well think about it: Lawliet already has everything she needs. The twin never let anything be lacking in the wheelchair. Also, everything needed in the future would be supplied without delay.

So why on earth would Birthday let him get involved with other people? It was unnecessary and dangerous. Nobody would take care of him like the Brit does. No one would put their priorities on the back burner in order to satisfy other people first.

However, right there in the confines of his heart, who knows all that might not be afraid that Lawli would exchange him completely for someone else?

No, no, NO.

That would NEVER happen.

Unthinkable possibility. Almost negative chances are so unlikely. It is a fact that there were setbacks. It was also a fact that Lawliet got off track every now and then. Even though nothing so serious had happened before. The most absorbed truth that B had was the certainty that nothing so serious could ever take away his brother completely.

And with that feeling of ownership that had settled in the long minutes of reverie, Beyond felt moved enough to take L for himself. He snapped his head under him, sharply. She held him by the scruff of the neck with one arm, and the other wrapped around his back. A last peek on the part of L was delivered in the eyes of the other, saying one last "please", dumb and perplexed.

It was ignored.

She shocked her lips with his, her tongue entering that familiar place. Always so warm, soothing. What a wonderful feeling it was to have him like this.

Being yours.

I didn't debate as much as the first few times. It seems that the weather was making it easier to accept. A great factor, it means that they were evolving.

It only moved away at the oxygen limit. Both panting, rushing to fill their lungs. Beyond didn't let go, he wasn't satisfied at all yet. He looked again for the path to the other's mouth, as if searching the surface of the sea, where he could breathe.

He was about to reach his goal. Well, very close, when, out of nowhere, he felt his shoulders being thrown back with extraordinary energy.

A push.

It was the result of all the rest of the strength that L still had.

Where had it come from? You have no idea. The desire to fight, apparently extinguished, hit him in the chest, in an arrow of foolish courage. As said, he was fed up, a glass that had overflowed a long time ago.

He sat using his hands as a support in order to observe the result of his art.

And you also noticed how stupid he was.

Birthday fell backwards, belly up. His eyes wide open, aiming at himself, disbelieving the action that had just taken place. Reaction at least acceptable, revealing the fact that this was the first attempt to fight back that L had had for some time. He was usually too numb to try to stop his brother with dignity.

Of course, he kept the rest of his honor broken into irreversible pieces. Of course, he felt rotten inside and out as soon as the act was over. But he was a frustrated soldier who knew his limited army and was aware of his death, regardless of how much he struggled to escape it. He preferred to keep his energy, his sweat, to try to make that situation a little less painful for him, a quick death and less humiliating.

The only problem is that: unlike the soldier, Lawliet would remain alive afterwards.

With that in mind, he returned to the scene. He saw the earlier indifference giving way to a scarlet red - a glaring hatred.

Beyond laughed a second time, totally hysterical. He laughed with his mouth open and his eyes slightly closed

the. It was both embarrassing and terrifying to wait for that scene to end.

He opened his eyes again.

Do you know what was there?

Outbreak.

-------- O ----------

─ I don't think I've seen you since the beginning of the year. ─ Mikami nudged the brown one, who was sitting at the table assigned to him. He propped one elbow on the cold glass covered by the pink decoration, looking at some point as if it were the most interesting thing in the world. I didn't think much. I was bored to be honest.

Light looked at him somewhat surprised by the shock it was to see Teru without the usual brown blazer, red tie and "student vice president" badge that were part of his school uniform. He wore only a polo shirt and jeans.

─ Hi Mikami. - He said friendly, but a little interested in prolonging the conversation. ─ I didn't know you were invited, too.

─ I didn't particularly want to come. But it would be a big undo for Isa.

Isa ... Isa ... Oh, of course, the birthday girl.

Light smiled tightly, without much to say.

─ You really haven't been in the office very much. Is there someone here? He pointed to an empty chair.

─ No, go ahead.

A few seconds went silent before Teru resumed speaking. Yagami did not look at him, but periodically looked into his eyes. He seemed hesitant about what he was going to say.

─ This system of pairs is really quite unpredictable, isn't it? She inquired with a suspicious tone, making Light doubt whether he was just talking about something or if he wanted to get anywhere. He knew Mikami well enough to differentiate his intentions. They studied together all their lives. And they were even good friends until the second year, when the height of puberty stoked the most useless areas of teenagers. These dramas passed, but the two did not speak again as before.

However, Mikami or the rest of the late elementary school class never mattered that much. Yes, he was an intelligent and conversational guy who had relevant issues most of the time. No more.

Now it was even a little less than that.

─ Do you think so? ─ she returned the question out of sheer laziness, taking the opportunity to see how she would conduct the conversation.

─ The intention is good ... But they did not know how to take advantage of the didactics.

─ Do you mean that the system is unfair? ─ one more question.

─ I only think that ─ pause ─ Some talents have been wasted.

Light took a long drink from his soda before turning to the conversation. The other boy definitely had intentions behind the words. He didn't even try to hide it, on the contrary, he made it explicit for Yagami to follow his reasoning.

─ I heard about your partner. A newbie. You must be smart, to have stayed with you.

Teru half-smiled at the comment, but didn't seem to be really grateful. It was as if Light had just hit the key he wanted to speak.

─ Naomi is good. You have incredible skills.

─ So everything is fine with the system, after all.

─ Yes, I mean, I never said there was anything wrong. ─ used a tone that resembled a mixture of disappointment / impatience. ─ But, don't you think they give a lot of attention to newbies?

Yagami's thoughts turned to English with whom he had spoken a few hours ago. In fact, the best pairs were made up of newbies.

Suddenly he pondered a hypothetically amusing question: And what would it have been like if this "revolutionary" system had not been installed just now, in its final year? Probably (almost certainly) that I would never, ever, have exchanged a "Good morning" with Lawliet. They would be completely strange, and his life would flow without knowing about the existence of that annoying and spoiled little Englishman, and of all the unresolved issues that still hang over his mind because of him. I would not win two beautiful encounters on the floor. I would not have bet who filled out 500 registration forms first.

I wouldn't be feeling potentially awkward for having kissed a boy and undeniably enjoyed the feel of his lips much more than Misa's.

Difficult to admit; but he liked the doubles system.

- Yes. Too much attention. - replied before the brunette repeated the question.

The vice president really smiled this time. He had thought that Yagami already shared his idea, when in fact, his mind was distant.

─ I also heard about your partner. A boy in a wheelchair. I saw you together once.

Light blinked hard, staring at the other. He began to suspect Mikami's ability to read thoughts. He was also aware of the likely comment he would make next. She looked at him with an expression saying "go ahead" to encourage him.

─ I ended up seeing a little of his performance. Uh, you know, I haven't seen anything so surprising. The attention in class is not the best. Your newsletter is not as flawless as it should be. It's good, but maybe not to be the best pair in school.

A little bit of the same irritation that Light felt when his little group talked about Lawliet

nvadiu, in smaller proportions.

─ Are you sure that you heard about him "unintentionally"?

─ It's just that, since I stay a lot in the teachers' room, I end up listening to a lot, you know ...

Light sighed.

─ Go straight to the point, Mikami.

─ I think we should change partners.

The Japanese man looked away without changing his expression. I knew everyone thought he was acting weird, but I didn't know they thought so. In the past few months, the only thing that Light is not doing is the old social interaction routine. It left the wheel of the "famous" in an incredible speed. He still treated everyone the same, however, and because of that, he has remained a darling until now. But obviously they would notice, sooner or later.

A chill settled in his stomach with a small theory: Maybe they were testing him to see if something so drastic had changed in him. Who knows, if he answered that he was satisfied with his partner, and that no thanks, he wouldn't change, Mikami and everyone else would start losing respect for him. He would be kicked out of the "clubinho" in the blink of an eye. And then, finally, I would be free of all those boring obligations I had to live in every day; the fake smiles, the stupid conversations, and better, the stupid people.

And ok, it was ridiculous to think about it, but I could be with Lawliet freely. Whatever sense he interprets for staying.

However, it was not that simple.

It has a whole life, a reputation that Yagami has built.

Look, he didn't even care about being loved by everyone the way he was. Okay, that filled up a little bit of his ego, but what good does it do if all these years, in all these moments, he never felt he was there for any reason other than convenience?

Light was always full of people, but it was always empty.

But, I didn't know how to be different. Being treated like one more, without special attention, having to hear rumors invented by the same group that had once been welcomed was a vision that brown did not have for himself.

I knew those people. They were evil, without an ounce of character. If they were already treating a random person badly that they didn't look like, imagine a former elite member like him.

In addition to missing out on future parties, his great influence with teachers, places of honor at events and elections for student council president, would be defamed by the four corners of the school.

And it would affect you. Oh, without a doubt. Light was not strong for these things. Despite being naturally talented for just about everything, he strove to be on people's minds as a synonym for perfection.

A little secret: behind his smiling and well-combed mask, there was insecurity. A lot, a lot, insecurity.

No, your idiot. Make decisions for yourself at least once in your shit life. You do NOT want to switch pairs. You cannot switch pairs. Because in addition to liking Lawliet, that would be a tremendous daughter. You know how hard it is to deal with, to fit in. Leaving you with an unknown girl is going to be a bit of a trip.

And your bond is gone, if that matters to you.

This annoying little part of your mind called "what I really want to do but I can't" fought incessantly against "what I don't want to do but it would be safer". They were harnessed with all the ferocity that even gave him a headache.

A tug of war.

─ So, what do you think, Light? He asked.

Yagami smiled.

─ I think it's great.

The annoying little partie lost.