Not Cancel

Dad. [Remove & Blocked]

If just now she find it quite easy, not difficult and a bit relief, removing and blocking all her cousins and people from the Zheng's circle from her friend list, now Chen Ziyi became hesitant and reluctant upon it was her father's turn.

There was this unexplainable feeling stirred in her heart. It was like as if by removing and blocking her father from her friend list meant that she actually remove her father from her life.

Can she actually do that?

Her eyes was staring hard at her father's name as she was contemplating on what to do. Can she actually cut off her ties with the Zheng's? She wondered if she can. Cut off her ties with her father? The others were just cousins to her and she had never been close to them. But he was her father.

After a while, a bitter laugh escaped from her lips. 'Father?'

Had he ever been a father to her? Her eyes turned colder as she was staring at the name. She couldn't help but to remember all the memories of her abandoned by a man whom she called 'dad'. How she was desperately wanted to be loved by the man who promised he will be always her knight. How she missed the warmth that once belong to her but now only a cold stare that she received.

After Zheng Shuyu appeared in their life, had her father ever treated her the same way before? Had her brother treated her good as they treated Zheng Shuyu? Her chest- no. Her heart always felt pain whenever she allow those low memories entered her mind and greatly influence her emotion. Her chest moved up and down, trying to take deep breathe before release them, as if the effort would help her to relax and cool down.

They said that her mother was a cold woman that they just couldn't click well. They felt insecure by her mother's higher status and they hate how her mother's eyes that always seems like she was looking down on them.

But, to Chen Ziyi. Her father was the cold one. How can he.. A drop of tears just rolled down escaped from her eyes, unconsciously. Her cold cheek could feel the warmth of the tears.

[Cancel?] [YES or NO?]

Again, can she actually cut off her ties with her father? She know that merely removing their name from her friend list didn't give any meaning to that extent. As if she could really cut off her ties with them by merely do that.

It was just a friend list.

But it's a first step. The first step for her to be freed. Free from her past. Free from the ones who will torture her, mentally and physically.

Free from the cage that trapped her from other beautiful things that she could have if she ever listen to her mother in the past.

It was just a friend list.

But if really by removing their names from the friend list meaning she freeing herself from them, she should feel happy. Be glad at least. Like a burden had been lift off her shoulder. But why she felt.. sad?

She indeed felt nothing when she remove their name from the friend list and blocked them from able to view her posts, but when it came to her father's turn, why she felt sad?

Is it sad?

"What are you doing? Still not sleep?" Chen Ziyi's hand froze once she heard her mother's call. Her chest movement automatically stopped as if it continue frantically moved, something bad would happen to the owner.

She didn't dare to let her mother to see her current state. She didn't dare to let her mother know what she was trying to do and what kind of ideas that played in her mind right now.

Although she was sure that her mother would probably the most happiest person if she found out that she tried to discard the relationship between her and the Zheng's, she still didn't want her mother to know anything of that.

She could imagine what kind of horrible ideas that her mother would have if she saw her current state.- and if she knew what she felt. Her mother could have wrong ideas where the only daughter she had would broke her promise to leave everything behind and start a new beginning together because she was still quite struggling and reluctant in regards to her father's matters.

Chen Ziyi was angry with her father, for betraying his promise. She hate her brothers, for being unfair to her. Of course, she was also upset with the Zhengs and the people in their circle. However, her mother wouldn't know anything of it.

If her mother see her current state, she wouldn't know that it was because of the memories that only Chen Ziyi had. Her mother probably think that she still had soft spot for the Zheng's. She didn't want that.

"There was dust entered my eyes when I was talking to Han Meirong just now. I will go to sleep in a few moments." Controlling her choking voice to not let her mother know that she cried, she replied.

It will be going a hassle if her mother started to ask about it. She had no any way to make her mother confide in her again if her mother started to doubt her.

After her mother turned off the lights and she was sure her mother had entered her own room, Chen Ziyi released a long sigh of relief that she also had no idea of how long she hold the breathe.

Taking a deep breathe again, she finds her own motivation words to stick to what she should do.

'This is the best decision. You have to cut off your ties with them. This is your first step. Yeah of course, ,merely remove their names doesn't mean anything much, so don't read this thing too deep. About dad, lets forget about him for now. It's not like it is important remove or not. It's not like he was going to care. Regardless of anything you do, he never cares. He wouldn't notice at all of whatever you do. You bet he did a check on your timeline. But knowing how your dad acting, it's better you remove him from your life.'

'Remove him from my life?'

'Don't doubt yourself! Whatever happen in the future in this life, will be different from the past. What stay same, is he never cares. The proof is until now, had he ever call you? What you should do right now is doing your best to live this second chance better than ever and go post your picture. Han Meirong must be waiting for you.'

A soft chuckle left her lips. Using her friend's name to cool her emotions quite a good way.

A small smile finally formed on her lips although her father's name on the blocked friend list was still in her sight.

[Cancel?]

[YES or NO]

[NO.]

Upon making sure every pest is remove from her friend list and her emotion is settled, Chen Ziyi went to her WeChat timeline. With a caption 'To a cold day tomorrow', she posted the portrait size one.

She then went to change her profile picture with a different picture but still the one where she was in hanfu dress.

Not looking at the reactions she got for the picture she posted, she turned her phone into silent mode before she went to sleep. She was mentally tired now because of the heart-clenching and crying session, so she wanted to sleep without any noise and to wake up later than usual tomorrow. So no alarm needed!

The next day, Chen Ziyi only looked at the phone after she had a brunch with her mother. As what she planned last night, she only woke up after nine o'clock.

She was lazily sitting on the sofa in the living area when she take a look at her phone. Not long after she turned on the silent mode, notifications keep popping out on her phone screen, to which make her surprised. She-never had that before.

She saw there was active chatting is happening in Knight Warrior's group chat. They were still typing so Chen Ziyi felt there was no need for her to rush to read their conversation. She went to have a check at the notification area to see what was the reason for her notifications can be that alot. She didn't think it was because of the chatting conversation that currently happen in the group chat.

'Aaaaaah I see. That's the reason'