TBBM LII. Sneakers

I fell from my seat and plunged loudly down the floor. My heart could not be silenced. I lied flat on my back as I negated the way of the game.

"Nooooo," I wept. "That book was supposed to match me to James. Why... Why did it always refer to someone else?"

"Jopet!" my mother ran up the stairs in response to the banging sound. "What's going on?"

"I'm doomed, Mother," I cried.

+++

These past few days, I'd been spending allot of alone time in the library with James and Roma. It was nice to see two of my closest friends really bond and laugh together. I used to only be alone with James or Roma separately.

"Jap," James called. "I bumped into Ma-ho earlier. She said there's been a pray-over session at your place?"

"Uh, that..." I closed my eyes in embarrassment.

"For our Finals?" Roma poked. "That's nice."

"Actually," I croaked. My mother thought I fell on the floor studying really hard for the Finals but if she only knew, that was actually me revolting against the current flow of the slam book. "Yes. For the finals."

"Good," James gathered his palms together. "I worried that something bad had happened."

"Oh!" I could very well tell that I was guilty, lying to his face. "Please, don't worry."

"For you," he slid a chocolate bar on the table, after making sure no one else noticed. "Eat that. It'll make you come alive. You looked really tired lately."

"Was it that obvious?" I laughed. It felt so nice to know that he'd been watching me. "I think it's my hormones. I noticed I usually had about a week and few days that I'm really tired. I got cramps too. But it usually subsides eventually."

"That's sounds just like me, James," Roma beamed. "I'm exactly the same when I have my period."

"I'm not sure I relate," James' face folded in some unreadable form. "Just eat, then."

I sheepishly picked up the chocolate bar from under my book. I wondered why he was so particular with me eating it already.

Just then, a fancy thought occurred to me---like some Heaven-sent epiphany that gradually descended upon my unknowing nature. I was sure that slam book was incorrect on all levels. I could feel my face blushing.

"You..." I cleared my throat, trying to look decent. "Didn't put anything here---like a ring, maybe, did you?"

"Ring?" James looked confused.

"Don't worry," Roma whispered to me. "There aren't surprises in that chocolate. I actually finished mine already."

"Y-you..." I froze, stunned. "James gave you one, too?"

Roma and James nodded at the same time.

#Ouch

I might as well just be swallowed by the floor alive. How could my Jim-jim give us both? I thought he was going to confess his feelings to me or something. My mood sank.

"Hicks," just then, I heard that familiar voice again calling me from behind. Because of that wicked slam book, I couldn't help but be annoyed of Red. I'd been ignoring his messages for a while now. "Join me. We're going somewhere."

"I'm busy," I dismissed him.

"You never had time for me," he stood beside me. "You don't even reply to my messages. Is that how you should treat your master?"

"Master?" Roma and James pried.

"No! No!" my hands flew in the air in defense. How could he openly tell my friends about that? He was incredibly annoying. "You misheard him. Really---"

"Yeah," Red chuckled. "We are very... very... secretive people---"

"Stop dragging her around, McIntyre," James intervened. "Mom had high expectations of her for Finals. You should let her study."

"Mom?" Red exhaled loudly. "I'm the real son. Stop calling our Mother your---"

I threw Red an annoyed stare soon as his voice started escalating. He stopped. He was obsessively competitive. He wouldn't even let James call my mother the way he wanted to call her. Also, he really liked blackmailing me into doing his likes.

"Why? Why are you mad at me again? What did I do again this time?" he sat next to me. "You're being all neck-bent nice to that basketball player but you're always rude to me."

Basketball player---he wouldn't even call James properly. I covered his mouth with my palms.

"If you disrespect my James again another time, I'll squish your face so bad you won't be able to bank on your good looks anymore," I warned him noiselessly.

"What about me?" he removed my hands effortlessly. "He provoked me."

"Stop already," I messed my hair in aggravation.

"I will if we leave now," Red convinced.

"Don't bother her anymore," James spoke from behind the book he was reading. "She obviously doesn't want to come with you."

"Mind your own business, Sanchez. If only Hickey didn't have a crush on you---"

"Red!" I threw my palm on his mouth again. He was unbelievable. I hooked my arm on his and dragged him out. "Let's go. Now!"

+++

"Why are you being so annoying?" I half-screamed as we reached the back of the building outside. "Why do you even talk to James disrespectfully like that?"

"Are you crying? No way!" Red gaped, his face turning red. "I can't believe you're mad at me for having a verbal altercation with that basketball player? I didn't even hurt him. Is he a baby that you need to protect like that?"

"Yes! He's my baby!" I shouted back at him. "Baby James!"

"Baby James?" Red couldn't fight his laughter off. He dropped his hands to his knees, laughing like crazy. "You bloody drive me nuts, Hicks."

"You even call me Hickey in public places. I told you not to do that because it's embarrassing---"

"Stop crying. People might think---" Red kept laughing at me as he scratched the back of his head. "Okay. Look who's the baby now? You're the one who's being a baby now. You're all feisty in a moment then you morph into a baby next."

Frankly, I couldn't even tell why I was crying, too. I got even more annoyed that he was laughing at me.

"Okay. I'll stop... laughing," he tried so hard to swallow his joy. "It's mid month. You always go inhumanly crazy on mid-months."

He sat me down in the corner and drew a biscuit sandwich from his pocket. He opened it, broke it to two parts and handed me one.

I realised I was hungry. So, I immediately nibbled on it.

"Like I thought," he chuckled. "You skip breakfast and you take it out on me. That's human rights violation, you know?"

"I had breakfast," I murmured quietly.

"See," he rubbed his palm on his face. "You're less rude now. Food pacifies you. If one day, I gave him a good uppercut, I'll make sure to feed you first---"

"Hey! Can't you really stop talking about James like that!?"

"If you say so," he raised his hands up in the air. "Wait. Why am I the one giving in to you? I'm the master here---"

I rolled my eyes at him. He stopped.

He watched me eat like I were a spectacle. He probably thought I was a pet that would follow him around after a meal. But the look on his face was distracting. He looked rather more delighted than scheming. I couldn't stand looking at him. It made me nervous.

He sprayed alcohol on my hands after. He liked things clean. He disinfected me, too.

"You're going to accompany me now?" he broached.

"I can't go dillydallying with you," I faced him. "I'm studying. I'm not rich like you---"

"Welp! She judged me again," he scratched his eyes. "I just need you to help me go to professors to check if they can credit my subjects---"

"Why me?"

"Our adviser said---"

"She said my name specifically?"

"Uh..." he paused a little. "She said that I can ask Hickey for help---"

"She doesn't even call me Hickey!"

"Fine! Whatever! But why are you so dismissive of me lately, huh?" he complained coyly. "You don't even reply to me. Do you know that I don't even message allot to people?"

Oh, no! He was making baby faces. It was so cute. It made me weak watching him.

"Because---" my voice broke. "We're too close."

"So what? I like to bother you."

I ended up going with him anyway. I never won against him. He always got me to do his bidding. But, I liked it every time he made that baby face. I couldn't question enough how a guy masculine as him could resort to making faces like that.

We had to go to three different departments and chase five professors. I was always polite and easy to deal with so the collegiate secretaries liked me. I thought that fact was going to come handy but soon as we entered the Faculty Rooms, the female secretaries attended to him immediately. One must look really attractive to be able to do that. We had to deal with one male secretary alone so, I was able to really help him just once.

Red kept looking at my sneakers as we went. I thought he was going to make fun of me for it. This was the same pair I wore that fateful night when I walked the highway. So, it obviously looked a bit worn. My mother even applied some adhesive to make the soles stick back to the frame. I kept pushing him to the front every time he peered.

He looked really happy when he got everything signed. I wanted to see how many subjects were approved to be credited in the over-all but he wouldn't let me see it. He liked to annoy me.

It took us about two hours to visit all our destination. He beamed at me like some happy kid on our way back to the library.

"What will you do when I'm not here anymore?" he suddenly asked.

"You mean when you started to take life more seriously and decided that wasting your time in a course you didn't like was unproductive and so you wanted to finally enrol in the right course?"

"Sometimes, I wanted to be that basketball player. You favoured him too much that you end up being a total jerk to me---"

That made me feel really guilty. I was probably being really mean to him.

"Hey," I went in front of him. "I didn't mean to---I just... Come on! I just want you to take life a bit more seriously."

"I am taking it seriously now," he said. "Well, how will you notice when you keep ogling at someone else---"

"What do you mean 'now'?"

"Never mind," he dismissed me and walked quickly ahead. He paused a bit to answer a phone call but then, he went so fast after that, I thought he was almost running away.

I tried my best to keep up with him but he outpaced me. I followed him, only to trip at the corner to the library.

My sneakers gave up. The front of the sole detached.