TBBM LI. The Magical Slam book

I watched James laid eyes on me, like some barrel full of secrets about to spill open after eons of silence.

I had waited for the moment when he'd confess to me for so long. I even rehearsed every possible reaction I could have for this moment. I imagined all possible circumstances and rebuttals. I'd thought about what his facial expression would be like. I pondered on whether he was the abrupt type or the classic slow.

My heart skipped a bit in anticipation. But strangely, why was I not too happy about it? It felt as though something was holding me down from being fully ecstatic. I had waited for this for a very long time.

+++

I sat on the corner of my bed as I looked helplessly at the slam book tucked under my pillow. I slid it underneath since I arrived home five hours ago. I wondered what James meant by giving me this.

It was one in the morning. I couldn't sleep. Reluctantly, my fingers reached for it and, in a nimble turn of the cover, I came across the title:

YOUR GUIDE TO THE RIGHT ONE.

I couldn't help but giggle after seeing it. I hopped on my feet and laid the book on the table hurriedly. I watched my face brightened in the mirror. I decided to wear the flower pin my mother got me.

Rapunzel. Rapunzel. Let down your hair!

Prince Charming. Prince Charming. Now, I will!

I woke up from my wakeful woolgathering to Red's message showing up on my phone screen. I ignored it as I imagined James more and more. I felt worse than unfaithful to James for ever doubting my feelings for him. I guessed it was because we hadn't been spending allot of time together lately---the very reason why I started to get confused.

Directions: Answer as many items as needed. Stop when you have reached ten identical answers (A-F) in the series of multiple choice questions. Interpretations are available at the back of this book. Try to answer as honestly as possible but do not overthink each item. Pick the option that resembles closely what comes to your mind first.

1. Which part of a man's face do you notice first when meeting a guy you like?

A. Eyes.

B. Nose.

C. Hair.

D. Jaw.

E. Lips.

F. None of these.

"Which option should I pick here?" I asked myself.

When I first met James, I really fell for his height and smile. But neither was in the options provided.

Eyes.

Nose.

Hair.

Jaw.

Dub dub. Dub dub.

My phone buzzed again with Red's message.

Eyes.

Nose.

Hair.

Jaw.

Oddly, I remembered his first day in the auditorium.

He had beautiful eyes. I meant, not chinky beautiful like James'. But I thought it looked beautiful. I couldn't justify. His nose... He had a tall nose, too. It looked just right for him. He wore his hair rugged. It looked unkempt, but strangely appealing. His jaw made him look strong.

Erase. Erase.

I shook my head.

If you answered Letter A, go to item # 7--- the book said.

7. What word did he/she use to refer to you the first time you spoke?

A. Curse words / tease names.

B. Your real name.

C. A love name.

D. Your title + your last name.

E. Called you by the dress you wore.

F. None of these.

I remembered that day early this semester:

"May I see your notes from last week?"

I could hear him loud and clear. But I knew I was dreaming. Slowly, a hint of a strong manly scent prodded through my nostrils as I handed over my notebook.

"You're nice today," he nodded. "Good. I wasn't so in the mood---"

"What are you saying?" I babbled. "Just go away. I know you're hallucination."

"Look at you, Loser," he chortled.

Loser? Had I just been called a loser?

"Boasty!?" suddenly, the realization closed in on me. It wasn't a dream. It was Red. He came back. He was gone for almost a week. "But, I thought you were dropping out?"

"Was that the first time we really talked to each other?" I asked in disbelief.

Letter A.

I did the sign of the cross.

9. How did you end up after the day of your first talk?

A. You fought.

B. You fell for each other.

C. You didn't like him/her in particular but you felt that he/she liked you.

D. You liked him/her but he/she didn't like you.

E. You forgot each other.

F. None of these.

Letter A.

"I got here first," I fired.

He shook his head again, making face. He was so annoying.

"What do you want?" I wailed. "Just let me in, already!"

"Honestly, I thought you were nice and meek but now, you're displaying bad behaviour..." he teased.

"I don't care what you think. Just drop your hand."

"Why? You can just turn the knob with my hand on it."

"Perv---"

"Loser---"

Just then, as we battled for the door, the professor opened it from the inside.

I ran out of balance and fell.

I shook my head in utter disagreement with the book.

I took a lungful of air, my hands were sweating in this grim path I seemed to be treading. This must all just be a coincidence.

11. What did he do when you first got into his car?

A. He/She strapped you with the seatbelt.

B. You kissed.

C. You embraced.

D. You made love.

E. You listened to music/watched a movie.

F. None of these.

Letter A.

By that time, the rain reached it's peak, we could barely make out of what each was saying, even inside the car.

"Are you rea-y? Yo- c-n't go h-me like this?" he had his grip on the wheel.

"Wh-t? I'm s--ry, I c---dn't h--r you."

"Wear y--- se-tb-lt."

"Unwear----What?"

"Y-- keep on yappin n-nse-nse," he launched in front of me. And I thought he was going to do something. I closed my eyes. I could smell him. He reached on to my side half-naked. "D-n't dre-am."

Seatbelt. He strapped me to my seat.

I thought he was going to kiss me or something.

21. What was the first thing he ever gave you?

A. Ice cream/desserts/snacks.

B. Device.

C. Ticket.

D. Gift-wrapped item.

E. Accessory.

F. None of these.

Dub dub. Dub dub.

Dub dub. Dub dub.

This game was getting unmanageably daunting.

"Jopet," he blocked my way. "Let's stop this."

Just then, a girl from one of the stalls approached us.

"Your order, Sir," she handed him two ice cream cones.

"Jopet," Red called me again, shoving one cone into my hand. "Don't be mad at me, anymore."

Ice cream.

Letter A.

I fell from my seat and plunged loudly down the floor. My heart could not be silenced. I lied flat on my back as I negated the way of the game.

"Nooooo," I wept. "That book was supposed to match me to James. Why... Why did it always refer to someone else?"

"Jopet!" my mother ran up the stairs in response to the banging sound. "What's going on?"

"I'm doomed, Mother," I cried.