Preparation Costs (25.6)

"Fine. Let's start with this, you both know that the crown of Sector 4 isn't a monarchy, right? I wasn't of any royal blood or anything," Elliot nodded but Chaewon seemed surprised, "I'm assuming you didn't know. That's fine, you'll remember eventually. The White Lotus purposefully made me in charge because they were running experiments on me. But this has to do with before all of that," Apocalypse took a shaky breath, "When I was thirteen, I was forced into a marriage."

Chaewon and Elliot's eyes were wide now, "Thirteen? Are you fucking kidding me, who—Why would you…How did that even happen?" Chaewon asked.

Apocalypse shook her head, "Wasn't really much of a choice on my matter. My parents practically sold me to that family, may they rot in hell for that. That was when I met Carlos for the first time."

"Were you engaged to him?" Elliot asked.

"...No. I was engaged to his older brother," Apocalypse responded slowly, "Not just engaged either, I was actually married to him for about two years? I don't know how they got away with it seeing I was literally a child but—"

Chaewon seemed to stop in her tracks, "You were a child. Are you implying that the guy you had to marry—"

"He was twenty-one and an abusive asshole with a drinking problem," Apocalypse said, cutting straight to it, "Don't think too much about it, because there are certain questions I'm not answering. Just know that after we got married, he ended up knocking up some other woman. He used to go help her while she was pregnant and he beat me half to death anytime he was at home. Carlos was the only thing I had to live for at that point. He felt bad for me so he'd always hang around me and take care of me when the bastard injured me. I fell in love with him and found out years later he felt the same at that time but by the time we were older, we had both moved on. Anyways, when my asshole ex-husband's mistress finally had the kid, she basically abandoned the baby. My ex-husband practically dropped the baby into my lap and told me that if I didn't raise 'it', then he'd kill me."

"Jesus," Elliot muttered, "Have you ever had anything go right in your life?"

Apocalypse smiled sadly, "Very few times. Barely any. But one of those things was having Carlos. He helped me raise the baby—We named her Liena. Then, one day, I was approached by White Lotus scientists. They wanted me to work for them, to be a patient in their testing. I had a bad feeling, and I refused."

Chaewon sat down on the chair near the bed as she put her head in her hands, "Oh, fuck. What the hell did they do? They never take rejection, ever."

"...They never take rejection, and they proved it. A week later, I came back from work to find Liena gone, the house trashed, and Carlos bleeding out. I got him to the hospital just in time, but they had to keep him there for a while to make sure it wasn't anything serious. When I got back…This part is really unpleasant. Are you absolutely sure—"

"Just say it," Elliot coaxed her, "We've gotten this far. Just tell us."

Apocalypse sighed, "Fine. Don't say I didn't warn you. I came back home and there was a package outside my door. It had no return address no sender but it just said, 'This is what happens to those who reject us,' on it. They…" She took a deep, shaky breath, "They stuffed Liena's dead body into that box and sent it back to me as a message. She was—She hadn't even had her first birthday and they killed her."

Elliot was pale and Chaewon looked like she was going to be sick, "Oh God…" She whispered.

"I tried to do something, I went straight to the White Lotus headquarters, I yelled, screamed, even broke windows, and tried to get in. Then they said if I kept at it, they'd kill Carlos as well. I went home and to my unfortunate luck, my ex-husband was home, and he knew the baby was missing. And he got really scary, really quick. He didn't actually care for Liena, he just needed her to be alive and healthy so his family would think of him well. I don't know what happened but I think I just…Snapped. When I finally came back to myself, my ex-husband was dead after having been stabbed seventeen times, and I had the knife in my hand."

"What the fuck, you were still, what? Fourteen at the time? How did you even…Did you even get away with it?" Elliot asked, his voice showing his shock.

Apocalypse nodded, "I knew when the cameras towards the street worked and didn't work. I dragged his body out, drove his truck to the middle of the woods, buried him, drove the truck into a lake, and walked part of the way back before hitchhiking. I knew I would be found out soon enough anyway so I did the only thing I could think of. I ran."

"Carlos was still in the hospital?" Chaewon asked.

"He didn't get discharged till the next day. I told him about Liena as soon as I found out. I told him that I'd killed his brother," Apocalypse said quietly, "He said it was only a matter of time before someone killed that man. He didn't want me to leave, though. I couldn't risk it, I couldn't risk him. So, I left. We only saw each other again when I was…Nineteen? Something like that. He was engaged and had a baby on the way. All three of us were at his wedding."

Chaewon furrowed her eyebrows, "I understand why you'd be there, but why were Elliot and I?"

Elliot stared at her, "...How well did we really know you, Apocalypse?" He asked softly, "Weew we really just working under you?"

Apocalypse sighed, "...You could say we were friends. Then again, I was friends with most of the people working for me—The ones that didn't try to kill me, of course. Forget that, it's not really the point. Either way, I just…I freaked out because that girl, Anha, if her parents are both gone then who's taking care of her?"

"So, that's what you meant by 'I can't let another one of Carlos's children die,' You meant Liena was the first," Chaewon said, "It wasn't your fault, you know that, right? If you'd said yes…" She looked down, "If you had accepted the White Lotus's offer, then she would have probably gone through what Leon, Risále, Hyunwoo, Bella, Fenix, and Owen had to go through."

"That wasn't your fault either," Apocalypse said, looking at her, "You didn't know they'd involve Leon if you joined them."

Chaewon crossed her arms, "Same goes for you. You didn't know what they were going to do when you said no. So, it's not your fault either."

Apocalypse sighed, "It's not the same. It's my fault, the only way people are safe is if they don't love me. My family was right when they said that loving me is a curse. They certainly didn't, that much was obvious by them selling me off to be married to a man over seven years older than me. And they're still alive, surprisingly, while I'm here, dead."

Elliot took a deep breath and took her hands in his, "I never really had a relationship with my parents," He said, "My mom cheated on my dad and tried to lie to him for years that I was his kid. One paternity test when I was four changed my whole life. They didn't split up, no, they thought I was the problem. They had a kid together and pretended I didn't exist. Eventually, one day, I woke up and they were all gone. They moved away and they left me behind. I was raising myself from the age of five. Nia and I grew up the same way. She lived the exact same way I did, her family just abandoned her when she was a kid."

"That's why you've been so protective of her…I knew you knew her but I didn't really know how…" Chaewon said quietly.

"That, and for a short period of time, before she was taken by the White Lotus and I moved to the mainland full-time, I was raising her," Elliot replied, "Either way, my parents told me the same thing, that I wasn't deserving of love, that I was a curse to the family, that I ruined their happiness. But it's not true. Those are just the wrong people. There are people who are willing to give you the love you deserve," He took Chaewon's hand and squeezed it, "And when you find them, you'll realize you were never the problem."

Apocalypse shook her head, "Bad things happen to people who love me. That's why I'm scared to love anyone."

Chaewon was the one who responded, "Bad things happen to everyone. It just so happens that part of that 'everyone' are people that love you. It's not because of you. Besides," She cracked a small smile, "Sometimes, loving someone is worth the pain. People go through all kinds of hell for love."

Before Apocalypse could respond, there was a knock on the door, "Guys?" Xander poked his head in, "Oh, Apocalypse, you're awake. That's good to see. Elliot, Chaewon, we're discussing tonight. We need you guys."

"We're coming," Elliot said, standing up, "We'll talk more later, you should get more rest. You really worried everyone."

"Wait," Apocalypse said, sighing, "That girl. Anha…Can you guys check in on her for me? I just…Want to know she's safe."

Elliot nodded, but Chaewon spoke, "That name…It sounds familiar. Did we ever meet her when she was younger?"

Apocalypse shook her head, "...No. I…Must have told you at some point when we knew each other but my…Birth name was Anha. I legally changed it when I was fifteen. That name was dead to me because of all the memories that came with but Carlos changed that just by giving his daughter that name."

"...What's your real name?" Chaewon asked.

The other woman smiled sadly, "That, I can't tell you. Think of it as a challenge for you to figure out yourself."

Elliot sighed, and the two of them went to leave, but Chaewon paused and looked back, "You said bad things happen to people who love you?" She asked.

"...Yes. Why?"

"Nothing. Just thinking about something," Chaewon responded, before turning on her heel and following her husband.

The door finally closed and Apocalypse slumped down in the hospital bed, "I know people go through all kinds of hell for love. I'm just glad you two don't remember it," She murmured.