Chapter 13

Shin yawned, opened his eyes, and stretched out through the tangled sheets. The bed smelled good. He loved the perfume Saito wore, and the scent seemed to permeate his skin and bedding. He turned his body around, keeping his belly up. At his feet, in front of a mirror, Sergeant Jiro was adjusting his jacket over him.

Impeccable.

Shin smiled. Not that he was in love, but it was a long time since he had enjoyed a friendship as rich and complete as Jiro's. Even with Mamoru, he had his secrets there. Shin had never confessed his feelings to him, for example. But with Saito, he could be frank, without masks or pretending.

" Where are you going?" He asked, smiling.

" I will go to Daihon'ei[31] to check if everything is fine under my change without higher orders."

" No higher orders? " Sakamoto sat down, annoyed. " Above me, only Hirohito himself!"

" Less, Shin, less ... " Saito laughed. " But I believe there will be no problems."

" Of course not..."

"I wonder if people don't criticize you for these thoughtless acts," Jiro observed. "Bring me to Japan without first asking my superiors or the Emperor ..." he murmured, and then raised his voice. "Don't you care about the reproachful look you get?"

Shin shrugged.

" When I am criticized, I feel like I'm at the Ueno Zoo, and some monkeys are pooping at me. I know they do this because they don't like me, but I don't condemn them. After all, I recognize that they don't like me because they are mentally incapable of understanding how phenomenal I am."

Saito laughed briefly.

" I think I will be quite envied. Leaving the common war to become an imperial guard " he joked.

"I couldn't have done it without you," he confessed.

Saito nodded. Then he approached the bed.

" When will you see your beloved Aiko?" He asked, suddenly. " We arrived the day before yesterday and you haven't made any move to go to him yet.

Sakamoto looked down. He felt pressured and didn't like it.

"It doesn't involve you," he said.

" I'm afraid that you fall in love with me " he was sincere, as always. " We became friends, but your eagerness to always be by my side worries me. I'm not open to love, Shin-kun[32]."

" I know that."

" Then?"

He closed his eyes, sulking. He felt guilty. Even when Shin slept with other people, it was just sexual relief, nothing more. He never let himself be involved, he never allowed anyone to know his soul but Mamoru. However, at that moment, Saito was as aware of Shin as Aiko. It was certainly betrayal, and he did n't know how to look at the other without letting all his feelings of remorse shown.

" Mamoru doesn't need to know what happened between us, Shin " Jiro whispered, stroking his hair, perfectly understanding his silence.

"He will know," Shin res muttered. " He'll notice it on my face. Aiko can read me so naturally that it scares me."

" Still, what do you think he will feel when he finds out that you is in Tokyo and did not go to see him? You owe it to him.

Jiro was, in fact, everything Shin needed. Someone to tell you what to do, to speak to he clearly, and point out facts and visions. He smiled again.

" I will. I'm going to take a shower and then I'm going."

***

The Ai house was quiet in the morning. Rika and Midori walked up and down, sweeping and cleaning in total silence, in a vain attempt to give Aiko peace of mind. He, sitting at the tearoom table, sipped the green liquid without comment. In front of his, Nana sewed a towel, while glancing at him to look away again at the fabric.

It was close to ten when Aiko finally opened his mouth. His strangled tone was crestfallen, sad, and devastated. His pain was not only because of what happened to Hiroshi but also because he was abandoned by Sakamoto, left to his own devices, without even being warned about it.

" What will we do, Nana? " He asked.

"Perhaps it is good to sell Ai," the old woman advised.

" And what about the girls? And Shiro?"

" Shiro can go with us. Soon he will be an adult and will be able to do some work. The girls can find another home."

" No house gives the protection we give here."

" What protection? " Nana dropped the needle. " I never thought I would say that, but you need to look for Shin Sakamoto and ask him to guard him again."

" Never! " Aiko screamed. " I prefer to be ..."

" What? Dead? Raped and then scalped? Because that's exactly what will happen now that you have lost Sakamoto's protection! " Her hands were shaking. " Kempeitai can come in here at any time " her eyes looked anxious at the possibility. " They may find ..."

" Shut up! " Mamoru scolded. " They won't find it. They don't even suspect. Even Shin, who slept for many years in my room, never noticed anything."

The woman put her elbows on the table, hiding her face with her hands. Aiko realized that his old nanny was desperate, and her eyes filled with tears.

"I was not prepared for the day's arrival," she said. " I always wanted Shin away for fear of what he might discover, but in my mind, the thought never passed that other people might be lurking to catch him, as soon as Sakamoto broke up."

The words hurt Aiko. He never thought that being rejected could hurt so much. There was a thorn in his heart, a pain that started in his heart and hurt his throat. Aiko wanted to cry more than he ever had. He wanted to hide in the room and disappear. However, he had responsibilities and knew it. A lot of people depended on him and could not back down.

" What will become of me, Nana?" He murmured, tears already cascading. " I never thought this would happen. I planned that we would grow old together ..."

The woman looked at him. Her anger stamped, unrestrained.

" I am worried about our lives, and you cry for your platonic love?" Her tone rose. "God! If you weren't a grown man, I would put him on me lap now and drop his pants. I would hit you and only release you when that white ass was in the blood!"

Mamoru was ashamed. In truth, if he died at that moment, he wouldn't mind. He felt dead, destroyed. He was weak because he was crying for such a foolish reason. Sakamoto had never been yours.

The knock on the door turned him towards the entrance. Shiromiya appeared, smiling. The youngest has been quite happy lately. The reasons, Mamoru was even afraid to ask.

" Sakamoto-san is here," Shiro said.

Aiko's shock was enormous. He didn't expect to find him. Not after everything Hiroshi had said. Beside him, Nana rose. For the first time in her life, the old woman smiled at the mention of Sakamoto.

" Go see him, Aiko. Drag yourself to your feet if need be " she advised. " We need him, you ..."

" I don't need someone to trade me for some guy! " Aiko cut her off. " Tell him I don't want to see him " turned to Shiro.

Shiromiya looked surprised. He looked at Nana for explanations.

" Give Shin Sakamoto a chance " Nana returned to Aiko, and held him by the arm. " Who knows, maybe it's all a big lie from Hiroshi?"

" If it were a lie, Hiroshi would never touch me."

" Aiko ..."

Mamoru broke free from the woman's hands.

" Leave me alone! " asked. " I will personally send Shin away. May he go to hell with his lover, may they both die during the war! " he wished. " I'll fix another way to protect myself from Kempeitai."

As soon as he said the words, he went out the door. Nana turned to Shiro.

" Go after him. Try to help with whatever it takes. If you need to, follow Sakamoto and tell him that Aiko is suffering. If Shin came, it is because Mamoru is not indifferent to him."

"I think he loves Aiko-san, Nana," Shiro agreed.

" You don't think anything!" The woman scolded. " A brat like you doesn't know what love is! To create hair on your face before you want to teach me about life!" She muttered, sitting down again.

As ordered, Shiromiya went out of the door.

***

Shin Sakamoto was standing in the hall. Impeccably dressed in a dark uniform, he held a small treat he had bought in Germany for Aiko. He returned his eyes to the corridor, waiting anxiously for the face that he loved so much.

It was quite true that the feeling of betrayal did not leave his mind. But, equally, in itself, the certainty of his feelings gave him confidence. After all, why all that? Jiro had been just one more. Aiko was unique - rehearsed the perfect excuse that could ease his guilt, but he couldn't be flippant with himself.

Jiro was not just another ... He was special.

In the days they spent together, they created a strong bond. Jiro amused him, he was exactly the kind of person Sakoto sought approval for. Even so, if he had to choose between them, Shin would choose Aiko.

" Go away!"

The angry scream hit him before the courtier's vision appeared. Aiko was livid, his eyes red and swollen, he had been crying all night. The handsome kimono was crowded, and he had red marks on his neck.

" I was half a year away and this is how you receive me?" He complained, nervous.

He took two steps towards Mamoru and saw him retreating.

" Go back to your lover " Aiko ordered. " I am sure that the handsome sergeant with whom he is sharing his bed is a much more pleasant company."

How did Aiko know?

Sakamoto is unable to mask his emotions. His countenance was so guilty when that of a child caught, in the act, stole the candy.

At that, Mamoru felt a sob escape his lips.

" I hate you! " shouted. " I hate! Never appear in front of me again!"

" Aiko " tried to bring him to reason. " I can explain."

A spray of saliva hit his face instantly. At the same time, Shin wiped the spit out of his eyes, increasingly irritated.

" God, Aiko! You are crossing the line."

"That is my answer to your explanations," the courtier said. " I will never forgive you. I have already forgiven you a lot, but this time, you left me months without a single letter, a single word ... And when I know something about you, it is that you returned to Tokyo and did not come to see me because your new lover is more important. Even Ryo-san has more consideration for me!"

Shin was surprised.

" Who told you that I was in Tokyo?"

" And does it matter?"

" Aiko, I will not allow you to walk away " it was firm.

" Then send Kempeitai to come here and kill me. Because I don't care anymore. Do what you want, you already destroyed me."

" It's being ridiculous! "

" Ridiculous is you! " Aiko advanced on him. " You arrogant bastard! Get out of my sight, I hate you and I never want to see you again. I hope you and your lover ... " fell silent.

Realizing the situation, he decided to turn away and walk away. Shin still tried to contain it, but Aiko broke away. Stunned by the situation, Shin only realized that he had lost it when Mamoru's image disappeared from his sight.

" Sakamoto-san?"

He spun around, watching the boy who danced standing beside a pillar. He had grown up since he last saw him, and he was also more handsome.

" Shiro, isn't it? " He remembered his name. " What you want?"

Kazue called him to a corner as if to accompany him to the exit. But his face showed something else, so Shin followed him.

"Aiko-san thinks you doesn't love him, but I know does," he said softly.

" And how do you know that? " interested.

"That night you wanted me," he explained, nervous about remembering things that bothered him, "you didn't get me wet."

"Didn't I get wet??" It took Shin a few seconds to realize that Shiro was telling him that he hadn't ejaculated.

" I ... " was speechless.

" It didn't get wet because Aiko-san shouted on the other side of the door. Then you left me immediately as if you were relieved by the interruption as much as I was. " held Shin's arm. " Many men have already been on top of me, hurting me. And none had stopped wetting me " he illustrated. " So I know you love him. And Aiko-san loves him too. "

"He spat on me," Shin murmured.

By heaven, Shin wanted to sit Shiro on the floor and lie on his lap. Why had he never noticed how charming he was?

"Aiko-san was almost raped last night," he said suddenly. " He's hurt in many ways, so he can't see everything."

Shock struck Sakamoto's eyes. His hatred exploded instantly, out of control.

" Who?"

" That man who was with you the day he came to the party in honor of the army. Hiroshi is your name."

Hiroshi? He would kill the son of a bitch!

" As?"

" He showed up last night and told Aiko that Sakamoto-san no longer loved him. He said that he has a new lover, that now Aiko-san is unprotected. So Aiko-san would have to accept him, or he would send Kempeitai here to frame him. As Aiko refused, he hit Aiko-san and threw him on the floor. Ryo-san and I were talking in the garden and we heard the screams. Ryo-san saved him. " Shiro reported quickly. "I don't know if I should have told you," he admitted. " Please don't tell Aiko-san that I told you. He is very dejected, ashamed, and disgusted."

Shin smiled. His big hands ruffled the other's hair in loving affection.

"I won't forget your loyalty, Shiro," he said. " As of today, it is on my list of friends."

Shiro didn't know exactly what that meant, but he smiled.

" Tell Aiko that I will prove my love for him today, " he asked.

And then he quickly left Ai, steps towards the Kempeitai barracks.

***

" Prove love? " Ryo murmured. " What did he mean by that?

" Do not know. Aiko-san doesn't know either. " Shiro replied. " Have you received a proof of love?"

The sudden question made Ryo drown with the tea. Then he coughed, thinking about the issue. They were in the tea room, it was late afternoon, yet another hot and feverish day. Ryo had finished his chores and gone to Ai. He missed Shiromiya, even though I saw him the night before.

" Now that you spoke, no, I never received it."

"I already," Shiro said happily. " My brother once went to work on a farm nearby and won strawberry cakes. And he brought it to me. So, even though he did things that hurt me, I know he loved me."

It was so little that Ryo almost laughed. In his childhood, he had cakes of any flavor he wanted on the table. However, no brother cared. And the truth is, neither father nor mother would look at him. He was just a boy raised by the employees.

" You love him? " Ryo asked. " His brother? " completed.

"My brother was a good boy, but ..." he was speechless.

Shiro looked at the table. There was a strong emotion in him and Ryo smiled. It was so fragile and transparent.

"I would like to tell him that I don't blame him for everything that happened to us," he said at last. " He did what he should have done."

" It is very kind to think so."

"We both needed to survive," he whispered.

Ryo nodded.

" Shiro, do you like swimming? " changed the subject, uncomfortable with the content of the conversation.

Shiro denied it.

" I do not know how to swim."

" There is a lake near Tokyo, it is a secluded and beautiful place. Would you like to go there with me?

The animation in the other's eyes was instantaneous. However, died shortly thereafter.

" Aiko-san won't let me go."

"Aiko doesn't need to know," he said, in the same tone. " What time do activities stop at Ai?"

" Around three in the morning."

" So, I'll wait for you at three-thirty on the other side of the wall. And when the day is about to dawn, I bring it back."

Shiro knew this was wrong. But the restlessness of his youth seemed to overwhelm him.

" It's so hot, isn't it? " Ryo teased him. " You don't know how wonderful it is to play at dawn in the calm waters of a lake."

It looked like torture.

" I want to go, Ryo-san. But..."

" But? Now, you are young and I am your friend."

" It's wrong without Aiko knowing."

" Aiko is too busy suffering for that idiot Sakamoto. Leave him to his problems and decide something for yourself."

Shiro seemed to meditate for a few seconds. Finally, he shook his head.

" I accept."

***

The militar district was filled with members of the army that late morning. They were celebrating something, Sakamoto didn't know what it was and it didn't even matter to him. He knew that Hiroshi had several friends in the military police and, after having unsuccessfully searched for him around the imperial palace, headed for the center of Tokyo.

He noticed some men bow when he crossed them, but he did not deign to face any.

" Lieutenant Hiroshi? " asked the location to a young policeman who was sitting at the door of the building.

The stunned boy almost slipped when he realized who was approaching him. He got to his feet immediately and bowed.

" Sakamoto-san! " greeted. " Lieutenant Hiroshi is inside talking to the major ..."

Shin paid no more attention to him. Ignoring him, he entered the building.

The wooden floor echoed with his heavy footsteps. The smell of hot water flooded his nostrils. Probably. the men were drinking tea while congratulating themselves on the war. Japan believed too strongly in victory. They had not lost a battle for a thousand years, had the confidence in the protection of the gods, and placed their faith in their Emperor. However, it was not time to think about the fight. There was something stronger in Shin than that.

He went into the chief of police's office and realized that there were more people there than Hiroshi. Everyone stood up, bowing, but he didn't even look at them. His cold gaze was completely focused on the man who accompanied him to Germany.

Hiroshi was assigned to his guard early in the war. He never sympathized with him, although he did not reject him. Unlike Takako, Hiroshi spoke without thinking, put himself in discipline, and used to face him without the due deserving that his lineage deserved.

However, he never imagined that he would try to force Mamoru. Just thinking about those big, thick hands touching the delicate skin-like satin, Shin lost control.

"You," pointed out Hiroshi, "to the field, now."

The camp was an empty lot behind the building, used by the men for training. At that time, it was full of officers and soldiers.

As soon as he gave the order, Shin left the room. His steps were straight into the field. When he got there, he walked over to the swords used for fencing training, taking two. Shortly afterward, Hiroshi and the rest of the police arrived.

" Sakamoto-san? " Hiroshi called him, curious.

A sword flew up to Hiroshi. Taking the hand, the lieutenant did not understand.

"Never touch what belongs to another man, Hiroshi," Shin said, cautiously. " You don't know this basic principle of civility?"

The other seemed to meditate for a few seconds. He looked at the sword and faced Sakamoto. He knew he was an expert in fighting, but he admitted that the other was no weakling. The outcome of that clash was unknown.

"If I kill you," Hiroshi began, "I will be killed next. No one can touch a member of the imperial family."

Shin laughed.

"Listen to everyone, " he shouted, looking around at all the soldiers who were already approaching, curious. " If I die in that morning, be witnesses of the legitimacy of this fight. Let no one touch a finger on Lieutenant Hiroshi, let him keep his post and his rank. The struggle you are going to witness has nothing to do with this man's war or his loyalty to the Emperor. " turned to Hiroshi. " Pleased?"

No, Hiroshi did not look satisfied.

"I'm older, more experienced," he said. " And I'm an expert in the art of the ancient samurai."

" Do you consider that I theme it? " Sakamoto laughed. "Raise your sword, damn you, and I will prove to you who here is an expert in fighting."

Already blind and inflamed with anger, Shin moved forward. The two swords met, making a high-pitched sound, tinkling in the air.

Shin had posture, and that Hiroshi noticed immediately. And he never tried to defend himself or retreat, the steps always advanced, seeking the opponent. It was strong but reckless. Hiroshi took two steps back, looking for breath, and then he also moved forward. One sword hit the other quickly, and they were tied for dexterity.

"As soon as you die," Hiroshi said quietly. " I'll take Mamoru for myself."

Hiroshi was trying to deconcentrate Sakamoto, but the effect was the other way around. The image of Aiko trying to defend herself arose in her mind, and her hatred increased. The force became even more potent and he delivered the sword at Hiroshi's chest, who deflected it with the other blade.

"Not understanding your anger," Hiroshi said. " I thought I was happy with Saito."

" Saito is my friend."

" Now, please, I watched them for months. I know very well what you do in the bedroom."

"What I do in the bedroom with Jiro is my problem," he defended himself. " It doesn't give you the right to hurt Aiko."

"I only hurt him because he has the despicable means of keeping himself just for you," he laughed. " What will he do if you die? There will be no other to protect that perfect, sensual face."

Seeing another man describe Aiko made Shin no longer repress his temper. The sword flew back, but that time, he put everything in it. Hiroshi was surprised, pushed the sword away with his own, and tried to drive it at his opponent, but he was quicker and took a leap back. Soon after, he attacked again. When Hiroshi tried to repeat the same gesture, Shin stopped the attack in the middle. Seeing Hiroshi's sword walking away alone, he realized it was the moment.

Unprotected, Lieutenant Hiroshi lost his life at exactly eleven hours and thirty minutes, when Shin Sakamoto's sword took his head off.

The skull fell to the ground before the body fell to the side. The eyes remained open, wide as if still surprised by the sudden attack. Everyone who witnessed the scene, until then, feared Shin by the surname he carried. In that instant, they feared him for the strong man he was.

"Bring me a bag," Sakamoto ordered a young man who was staring at him with wide eyes.

The order was fulfilled in seconds. With the burlap cloth in her hands, Sakamoto walked to her head and lifted it by her hair.

" Do you see that piece of meat without life? " shouted. " This is what happens to those who dare to touch what is mine!" He warned. " When you dare to raise your eyes to the owner of Ai, remember this episode, and think if Aiko's beautiful face is worth your head. "

After that, he left with the bag in his hands.

***

" Keiko sent a letter " Nana came up with a paper in her hands.

Aiko looked up, staring at the old woman running towards him in the garden.

" How do you know it's her?" He asked, before picking up the mail.

Soon after, Rika, Midori, and Shiro also approached, anxious for news.

" Who else would write to me?"

Mamoru smiled. Nana handed him the paper, anxious for him to read the news. The old woman, like the others, also did not know the letters, and whenever they received a letter, they ran to the courtier.

" Oh, she said your boy is already talking " Mamoru smiled. " Isn't it wonderful?" He was silent, suddenly his eyes filled with tears. " Call him Kazue Mamoru. " looked at Shiromiya.

Shiro smiled, also moved.

" What else does she say, Aiko-san? " demanded that he continue.

" She says she is living quietly, thanks to the job that Sakamoto found for her in a factory. The son, she leaves with her younger sister, who will raise him until he is old enough to go to school. Keiko said that she is happy, that she misses us and that one day she will come to see us."

Everyone smiled when Aiko lowered the paper. It was encouraging that a former prostitute was now able to live decently and peacefully. A hope for Rika and Midori.

The fraternal moment, however, was interrupted by strong kicks at the gate. Mamoru stood up, ready to run over there and expel anyone who dared to such an affront, when the gate opened wide, breaking.

His amazement at seeing Shin Sakamoto in front of him after being sure that the other would not return was clear. He had cried all night and part of the morning and decided not to be bothered by anything Shin would say or do. He walked straight to the other, head held high.

" What are you doing here? " He asked. " And how dare you break my gate?"

" You wouldn't open it if you knew it was me."

" It wouldn't even open! " confirmed. " I don't want to see you anymore. Go away!"

Shin laughed contemptuously.

" You told me that many times, Aiko. But now I know what you says because you doesn't trust my feelings. However, I am here to prove them to you."

Before Mamoru even replied, Sakamoto tossed the bag at his feet. Hiroshi's head rolled against his sandals. In a jump, Aiko jumped on top of Nana, screaming. Rika and Midori followed the screams. The three became hysterical as Shiro watched everything carefully and Nana turned her eyes to Shin.

" When, in the name of Kami-sama, is this a proof of love? " Aiko shouted.

"A man protects the one he loves," Shin said. " This is what will happen to anyone who dares to touch you or threaten you."

After that, Shin turned his back and left. Shiromiya followed him with his eyes until he saw him disappear and then looked at Mamoru.

"It was very romantic," he murmured.

Aiko didn't even pay attention to the speech. I was almost climbing Nana, so terrified.

" Get that head out of here! " shouted.

" Don't look at me " Rika ran away.

" Much less for me " Midori went after her friend.

Nana snorted.

"If you let me go, I can put it back in the bag," the fat old woman mumbled.

" I put ... I put " Shiro offered, running towards the skull. He lifted him by the hair, watching his face intently. Then he put it in the cloth bag. " Where should I keep it, Aiko-san?"

As soon as Hiroshi's image disappeared, Aiko released Nana.

" Save? Not! Take him to Kempeitai's headquarters, and explain what happened. In case you don't come back, I'll go there after you myself. However, I know that they all already know, because Shin loves to show everyone his achievements."

Shiro nodded and bounded out into the street.

"I'm relieved," Nana murmured. " Shin made it clear that he protects him and no one else will dare ..."

" I don't believe you admire this act ... "

"Burn your secret," Nana cut him off. " So he will die with me. Only we both know what you have inside the wooden box in your room. We can enjoy that Shiro left, and Rika and Midori are in the kitchen ..."

" Not! " Aiko refused. " I'd rather die than do that. You know how much I care ..."

"But is n't Sakamoto going to go to that house again?"

" Shin killed Hiroshi, which proves he is possessive towards me. However, it does not clear he of having a lover."

Nana was annoyed.

" Fuck the lover! You can be killed if ..."

" I already said no! " Aiko was firm. " Don't insist anymore, please."

When he walked away, Nana shook her head. Even with all that Shin was doing in the name of the said love he said felt, the woman knew that this feeling would die in the face of Aiko's sin, kept in his room.