Chapter 42

Shiromiya waited for him to get home at the front door. His smile was so passionate that Ryo found himself smiling too, returning the gesture with deep affection. The smaller man took his hand and pulled him into the room. There, he took him to the bathroom, where the bathtub awaited him for a hot shower.

" Why? " Ryo asked, knowing he was not worthy of any pleasure.

"Because I love you," Shiro replied, simply, as if it were the most logical of all the answers.

Kazue helped the merchant to undress. When Ryo sat in the bathtub, Shiro knelt behind him and rubbed them with a piece of lilac-colored soap. The scent of water delighted Ryo, who found himself relaxing for the first time in months.

"I dismissed your maids," he said. "I wanted to make your dinner," he smiled, his head bowed.

" Can you cook?"

"Nana taught me," he admitted, his tone sad.

It was still very difficult to talk about the old woman without feeling his throat hurt.

" Okay, I'll try your food then " Satoshi agreed, smiling.

Shiro leaned over and kissed him on the mouth. Then he got up.

" While you finish your bath, I'll be setting the bedroom table."

As soon as Ryo left the bathroom, he found a table set next to the bed. He smiled at the simple dishes - rice, fish and salads - but made with care. He dropped the towel on the bed and put on his kimono. He noticed Shiromiya's black eyes on his naked body, and the desire seemed to resonate with him.

Slowly, he closed the kimono, allowing the defined abdomen to be exposed as long as possible. He liked that malicious joke, in which he could manipulate the boy's almond-shaped eyes as he pleased.

" I want to eat..."

" Then, sit down." Shiro pulled out a chair.

" I want to eat you ..."

In seconds, he was in front of the other, who didn't even try to fight the desire. Shiromiya's soft hands slid over Ryo's kimono, not staying two minutes over the male body. Then it was pulled out, thrown into the distance as if it were nothing more than a hindrance between them.

"I prepared the food so carefully," Shiro whimpered as if fighting his own will.

" You will have your whole life to prepare food for me, Shiro ..."

" In that thought, I will have my whole life to be loved by you " he countered, laughing, touching his nose with the other.

Ryo's erect penis touched his belly. He looked down, realizing that his own seemed to want to slip out of his pants, anxious to meet that unholy sin.

Ryo then reached inside the light linen pants and pulled the lover's small organ, joining the two masts with his hands that caused an intense and painful wave of pleasure when they met. Pressing the two members against each other, Ryo groaned, watching the way they seemed to squirm as if they wanted to unite, even more, fitting perfectly into that erotic game.

" Take off your pants and stay on all fours, " Ryo said, his voice almost squeaky.

Shiro found himself carrying out the order. He pulled his pants down, kicking them with his feet to the same place where Ryo's kimono rested. Then he dug his knees into the bed, laying the front part on the pillow, looking forward to the pleasure he knew would come beforehand.

Ryo knelt behind him, white fingers holding his hair, pressing his face tightly against the bed, making him agonize with pleasure.

And then came the penetration, slow and gentle. Shiro felt himself inflating at the sensation of Ryo's body inside him, provoking in him all the sensations he always knew how to deserve, but never expected to receive.

Ryo walked away and came back. And again. Once again. That erotic dance, the perfect coming and going, uniting both in sin as sweet as honey, made him moan loudly, unable to avoid.

" Ry-chan ... " he called.

As if guided by pure instinct, Ryo took his penis and turned it on the bed. He lifted his legs and invaded him again.

"I like to do it looking at you," Ryo whispered.

Shiro pulled him in for a kiss. The tongues, daring, began to imitate the movement of the hips.

Suddenly, the pleasure seemed to increase. Even though they did not want the sensation to stop, the bodies started to move in a more intense cadence. Shiro shouted at the way Ryo lifted his legs further, placing his ankles over his shoulders.

" Ry-chan " begged. " Faster Please..."

Ryo started to hit Shiro's butt harder, almost hurting him. He had completely lost his mind and only realized what he was doing when he screamed before the orgasm that took him, and his member escaped from Shiro, melting his lover's entire body.

"Heavens ..." he murmured, falling on top of him.

He felt Shiro's trembling fingers holding his forehead, and again being kissed with passion.

" What did you do to me?" He asked.

" Was it never like that with other people? " the other returned, interested.

" No " Ryo admitted. " There was pleasure, but it was nothing compared to what happens when I'm with you" he rested his head on Shiro's neck, inhaling his perfume. " And with you?"

Silence.

" Shiro?"

" You asked that jokingly, didn't you, Ryo? "

He lifted his head and watched him. He noticed the tears in his eyes.

"Sorry," he said, guilty.

" I never loved anyone but you. I never gave myself to anyone but you. I never felt any kind of pleasure, besides those living in your arms " Shiro said, seriously, his voice overflowing with emotion. " Nobody ever offered me anything, just took me, Ry-chan. In your strange way, you were the first to share something with me ..."

Ryo kissed him as if to apologize for the thoughtless words.

" Forgive me."

The other nodded, and then Ryo smiled.

"Now that I have eaten you, I want to taste the food," he joked, drawing a fierce laugh out of Shiro.

Shiro then got up and served him a plate.

That night Ryo knew what it was like to be pampered. When being fed by Shiromiya while still in bed, he thought again how special Shiro was. He promised himself to give him much more than he had planned. Ryo would make Shiromiya the happiest lover in all of Japan, with all the unimaginable goods surrounding him. And in that way, nothing and no one could take Shiro from him.

***

"It fell, Germany fell," the local radio announced, in a laconic tone, as if announcing the end of an entire era.

It was May 2, 1945. Ryo sat beside the radio while sipping cognac. It was still morning, but he was unable to avoid the apprehension, and he thought that drinking might ease his bitterness. Ahead of him, Shiromiya listened in silence to the speaker to continue the narration, praising the heroism of the German troops, who bravely fought the last of the Nazi battles. While German troops surrendered in Italy, in Berlin there was still a small army at bay, trying to protect the divine city from the reds.

Suddenly, there was a shuffling of papers, audible by the sound of the box. Shiromiya realized that more (and bad) news had reached the press and faced Satoshi, who simply shrugged.

" British radio stations are announcing that Hitler committed suicide. Hitler is dead! " the unknown man said as if he didn't believe those words. " Hitler is dead! " he repeated, that time more firmly.

Shiro winced.

" I doubt it " Ryo took another sip, the last, and placed the glass on a counter. " The coward must be in another country, perhaps in the face of the Americans," he laughed.

Shiro looked thoughtful, but he didn't contradict him.

" And Shin? " questioned, because until then, it was the only thing that worried him.

"I don't know, Shiro," he admitted. " Japan will also be defeated and I have no idea what will happen to the Imperial family. I worry about that, but it's not in my hands, and I can't do anything."

The minor nodded.

" I would like this war to end soon. I want to see Midori, Rika, and Keiko again. And I want to see Aiko-san too. Every time the sirens sound, my heart starts to pound, I feel so bad ..."

Ryo took a deep breath. Sirens used to sound every day. Explosions sometimes occurred, but most days, they were just weather planes passing, nothing to worry him or the rest of the city.

" At the same time, I fear the end of the war, I fear what can happen to Sakamoto-san. "

"Shin has blood on his hands, Shiro," Ryo said, seriously. " He knows that, so I'm sure he doesn't fear what will come. Your only concern must be Mamoru."

Shiromiya was annoyed by Ryo's cold way of speaking.

"He is your friend."

" I love him and would die in his place if I could. However, I am realistic."

Shiromiya stood up. He prepared to leave the wing when the radio came back, causing the young man to turn his attention back to the news.

" Italy fell! Germany fell! " a man other than the speaker started to speak. " But our homeland will resist! Japan will fight until the glorious end, because we, the protégés of the sun goddess, do not fight in vain. Our holy war, often painful and overwhelming, prepares us for the right victories, making us appreciate every smile of tomorrow. We will win!" The man exclaimed. " We will win! Banzai!"

Ryo laughed.

" By the heavens! How I hate the military."

He got up and turned off the radio. Then he went to Shiromiya, holding his shoulders.

"Don't worry about tomorrow, Shiro," he advised. " The destination is already set, we like it or not. Let's just live today, because today means we're together, right?

He pulled it out, kissing his lips.

Shiromiya did not seem to like the words but remained silent, unwilling to reply. He simply agreed and walked away.

Germany surrendered unconditionally to the Allied and Russian forces five days later. The news reached the Japanese the next day and was heard without much surprise. However, even so, the people promised to work even harder on the resistance.

Many cities had already been bombed. Most of them, more than once. The dead and wounded were piling up. Yet, ironically, there was hope. As much as the war had ceased in Europe, in that eastern country, the soldiers still swore by loyalty to the Emperor, and the people came together working in the factories and prayers in the temple.

In the second half of June, Ryo remembered Shiromiya's birthday. He knew it was a very special date and wanted to enjoy it with his lover because it would probably be Shiro's last birthday when they would be together. Then, he organized a small party for two and made him drink alcohol for the first time.

"You not a boy anymore," he joked. " Even if you're not old enough to drink, who cares? Nineteen years without taking a sip is too time long" he laughed.

Shiro hated wine, sake, and even cognac. He went back to the juice, hearing Satoshi's mocking laugh behind his back.

That June night must have been a happy date, but the young man was embittered and sulked in a corner. Ryo even tried to make him say, but the missing that the other felt for Mamoru Aiko finally sapped his strength, and he ended the night crying.

A few days later, Okinawa fell.

***

" Masahide Ota said he will continue to fight the invaders " the radio spoke, the morning after the fall of the city. " And many of our brave soldiers did not surrender."

Shiromiya approached Ryo. He was sitting in front of the device, as was his custom for the past few months. He handed him a cup of tea, which was met with a smile.

" Who is Masahide Ota?" He asked.

" The mayor of Okinawa. "

Shiro looked down thoughtfully.

" If there are still soldiers fighting, why do they say Okinawa fell?"

" There is no army, only a few men are hiding in caves and holes shooting at Americans at random. There is no organization, only despair."

Shiromiya sat across from him. His hands slapped his knees for a while as if he were preparing for an argument. Ryo watched him curiously and waited until he opened his mouth.

" Can I order something?"

Shiro didn't usually ask for much. Out, of course, in sex, when he was extremely demanding. However, daily, Shiro didn't ask for anything. His job application, weeks before, was the only thing he required. That made Ryo feel strange, as he was used to paying for the services of his previous lovers. However, Shiromiya refused the jewels, and even the money he insisted on giving as a pretext for protection, was received with restless and vacillating eyes.

"You can ask me for anything," he said happily, at last, the other seemed to be loosening up more.

" Can I talk to Aiko-san?"

Ryo almost spits out the tea.

" The calls are terrible, Shiro ... Just yesterday I tried to talk to Shin, and it wasn't possible " he lied.

" So, I could dictate a letter ... Would you write to me?"

" The chances of your letter being received are almost nil. The Americans are bombing the post office cars, communication is very complicated ... " he softened his words and then followed. "I know you miss Aiko, I understand that," he said. " But the war is near the end, hold on a little longer. When it is all over, we will go to Tokyo and you will see him again."

Suddenly, he realized that he could buy a house for Shiro in Tokyo. Now, he would be close to Aiko and not feel alone when Ryo returned to the family. And, out of sight of his future wife and children, he could keep him in total secrecy from slanderous mouths.

" Yes, Ryo-san " heard Shiro's comforted tone. "I trust you," he added with a smile.

Ryo held out his hand. Shiro took it and felt himself being pulled. Without repressing his wishes, he sat on Satoshi's lap, who kissed his neck lightly. They stayed that way for the rest of the morning, listening to the information on the radio. Even though they were terrible, it did not reach them, because, in their bubble of love, they seemed alien to the rest of the world.