35. Aisha Paul

I ran a fever for three days. I had switched off my phone. Sarthak wasn't around so I curled up in bed with my mother's arms around me and cried all day. I felt guilty. What would my mother think when I tell her this? My father? They would die knowing I exposed myself to such a risk. They had placed their trust in me and I had betrayed it by getting drunk and allowing this to happen. It was a lesson, and I deserved it.

The bell rang. 'Let me get that,' my mother said. I clutched her tighter. 'I have to, baba.'

She tucked me in and kissed me and left to get the door. Minutes later, I heard a few voices from the living room and then the shuffling of feet.

'Look who's here!' exclaimed my mother, her arm interlocked around Vibhor's. He was smiling, and in my house, in my room with my mother by his side.

'Beta, she's been sick for three days. Sit, sit, I will get something for you to eat.' My mother left me with him in the room.

He came and sat next to me and he wasn't smiling any more. I pulled the blanket over myself. He held my hand softly, like the nice boyfriend he was, and kissed it softly. I jerked my hand back and it was wet with his saliva. I rubbed it on my bedsheet and tucked my hands beneath my thighs.

'I missed you so much,' he said. 'A strange thing happened today in school.'

'What?'

'Norbu told a few people that you were sleeping when we had sex,' he said as a matter of fact. 'Why would you say that to him?'

'I didn't—'

'Of course, you didn't,' his voice down to a murmur. 'He told me you said that to Namrata.'

'I was just—'

'We had a little fight, Norbu and me. I know you said it because he took the beating.'

I gasped.

'All I want to understand is why you said it.' His eyebrows burrowed. He got up and paced around, scratching his forehead.

I stared at the wall behind him.

'TELL ME.'

'I was sleeping . . . I didn't know you—'

'SO WHAT?' he shouted and punched the wall. 'You wanted it as well. You know that!'

'Vibhor, I'm sorry.'

'You are sorry? YOU FUCKING GOT DRUNK THAT DAY! IT WAS YOUR IDEA TO STAY OUT! YOU KISSED ME AT MY PLACE! And you accuse me of rape—' he yelled. 'Are you out of your fucking mind? Do you know what people would think of me? That fucking teacher of yours called me into his room like I was a goddamn mental person. He fucking threatened me.'

'I'm sorry, Vibhor. I just told her I was sleeping.'

'THEN WHY IS THE WORD RAPE HANGING IN THE FUCKING AIR. What do think others will think about me, huh?'

'I just—'

'You didn't say anything the next morning. You sat at the dining table with my mother and you were smiling. You were smiling and holding my hand, damn it.'

'But you didn't ask me before—'

'Ask you? You were piss drunk, Aisha.' He unbuttoned his first button. 'This! You gave me this before you passed out!' He pointed to a love bite a little below his collar bone. I was crying now. And so was he.

'Vibhor?'

He spoke again, his face was flushed red, 'I should have known better. I should have listened to the others. Everyone called you a slut and yet I dated you. It was a damn MISTAKE!'

'I'm sorry,' I mumbled.

'Sorry? You're sorry?' he said and came close to me. 'I'm sorry to have not known that you're a bitch! Not that anyone would ever believe you, but I can't have people looking at me strangely.'

He held my hand and squeezed it till it hurt. 'You're going to come to school and tell everyone it's a sick joke, okay? Or I'm going to the principal tomorrow!'

'But—'

'Tomorrow! And I will show all the pictures to him of me and you and all your friends drinking! They will all tell the principal you were drunk out of your mind and were all over me,' he said, angry and teared up.

'But—'

'TOMORROW!' he shouted.

My mother walked in with a tray with two glasses of Coke and steaming pakodas and placed it on the bedside table.

'Thank you, Aunty, but I need to go,' he said. He bent and touched my mother's feet, waved at me and left the room. My mother left after him to close the door, asking him to stay a little longer.

'But I was sleeping and you didn't ask. That's rape,' I finally mumbled as I heard the door slam close. It sounded ridiculous. Obviously, he was right. I was asking for it. How would he know I didn't?

I didn't even say no.

I had to go to school the next day and apologize for the ugly rumour I had spread. It was all my fault. I called Namrata that night and told her about the lie, and she screamed at me because it was my fault Norbu got beaten up and called me the worst friend ever. She cut the line. But she texted me seconds later.

NAMRATA: I'm sorry. You're lying now. I just thought about Norbu and acted out.

AISHA: Let's not talk about it. I will clear it out tomorrow morning.

NAMRATA: Are you sure?

AISHA: Yes.

NAMRATA: I'm sorry.

AISHA: It's not your fault. I would have said the same things. Goodnight.

NAMRATA: Goodnight.

NAMRATA: ?

NAMRATA: Are you there?

NAMRATA: Pick up my calls?

NAMRATA: Aisha, call?

NAMRATA: Don't scare me? Are you there?

NAMRATA: ?????????????????????????????????????????????

AISHA: I'm okay. Night.

Last Chapter Next Chapter