34. Danish Roy

  That's why the Internet is a good place, a safe place, and no one's disappointed or rejected on the Internet if you just manage to lie right.

  Right now, Mohini, a girl I found on Tinder was sitting next to me after she sat through a boring movie with one expression, and told me categorically that she thought video games were for children. She was training to be a doctor, and had had five boyfriends (though none for the past one year), read a lot of books, so she wasn't to blame for why we got bored that day. It was probably me. It was mostly. Fine. It was me.

  'I'm sorry,' I said. 'This date isn't what you expected, is it?'

  'You come to expect these things when you go out with faces and not people,' she said, referring to Tinder.

  'Do you do this a lot? Try to find love like this?'

  'It's pathetic and desperate, isn't it?'

  We kind of felt bad for ourselves, and then giggled and then laughed. This was the first moment of our date which wasn't excruciating, and things turned for the better after that. Suddenly, nothing was at stake. We didn't try to impress each other by being funny, or knowledgeable, or ambitious, or fun any more. We admitted being different and that's when we could finally talk and get to know each other better. She told me how much of an asshole her ex-boyfriend was, and I told her about Aisha.

  'So you really love her?'

  'I think it's the closest I will ever get to love,' I said.

  'Are you crying?'

  'Me? No. Maybe a little bit. On the inside.'

  'That's sweet.'

  'I miss her so much, like there is an empty cavity inside my ribs, funny as it may sound, it is painful and it's embarrassing.'

  'She must be perfect,' the girl said, her eyes lighting up.

  'She is full of beautiful little flaws. And she gets excited whenever she discovers one. It's so cute and noble and amazing.'

  'Not flirting because that hasn't clearly worked for our date today, but you look amazeballs when you talk about her,' she said.

  'Well, she's someone else's now,' I said and shook my head.

  'Never mind, at least you felt love and that's a rare thing,' she said and held my hand.

  'Have you felt love?'

  'Maybe, maybe not. I'm not sure. I will keep you posted though.'

  We laughed. The rest of the date wasn't half as bad. We talked about her college, her proud parents, her nosey relatives, and I told her about my brilliant brother, my sceptical parents, and we had a nice time. She dropped me home and we promised to keep in touch.

  The next day at school, I heard rumours floating around in the school like harmless dandelions. I walked slowly through the corridors, spent more time at the urinals eavesdropping on students talking about her.

  'Such a slut.'

  'She begged him to let her give him a blowjob.'

  'Did you see the pictures? She would have fucked an electric pole.'

  'She hit on me as well.'

  'She's an actual whore.'

  'She's fucking lying. She must have slept with someone else as well.'

  'She's not hot enough to be . . . you know what.'

  'How's that even possible? She must have been turned on for him to push it inside.'

  'She deserves it. Look how drunk and slutty she got.'

  After a point, I knew I had to stop or someone would have had their skull crushed. I decided to get to the bottom of this. I looked around for Aisha but she hadn't come to school that day. Neither had Namrata. I got hold of Norbu who was nestled in the far corner of the library.

  'What the hell is going on? What are these rumours about? And where's Aisha?'

  He looked up. His left eye was bruised and his lower lip was cut and crusted with blood. The top three buttons of his shirt were ripped and the shirt pocket with the logo had been torn off. He started to cry a little.

  'Come outside,' I said, held his hand and led him outside. He sat on the stairs and adjusted his shirt. 'What happened to your eye?'

  'I didn't mean to—'

  He broke down in little sobs.

  'Who hit you?'

  'I can't tell you.'

  'You will. Or I will find out.'

  'The guys in the football team.'

  'Why?'

  'For what I said about Aisha and Vibhor.'

  'Please tell me you had nothing to do with all the nonsense that I have been hearing about Aisha.'

  He stared at his shoes.

  'Norbu? What did you do?' I banged my fist on the table. He cowered. I counted till ten and calmed myself down. 'Fine, tell me and we will fix it.'

  'I told someone what Namrata told me,' he said.

  'What did she tell you?'

  'Aisha claims she had been raped that night, that she was—'

  'Wait? What? What are you saying?'

  'I'm just telling you what Namrata told me!' he said, covering his face with both his hands. Norbu told me that Aisha had lost (what Aisha would call 'shared') her virginity in her sleep and hadn't consented to it. She had no memory of it.

  'Are you sure that's what she told Namrata? That she was raped?' I asked.

  She had no reason to lie. Namrata was her friend, her only friend, and she would never lie to her.

  'I'm sorry,' said Norbu.

  'You did no wrong. You can leave now.'

  'But sir—'

  'JUST. FUCKING. LEAVE.'

  'They . . . they will hit me again,' said Norbu, clutching to his seat. 'Please don't tell anyone.'

  'I'm sorry for shouting. I won't tell anyone. Where is Namrata?'

  'She's not talking to me since I—'

  'It's fine,' I said. 'I will talk to her. No one's going to hit you again. I will make sure of that. Does anyone else know? Has she told her parents yet?'

  'No.'

  I wrote Norbu a sick note and he was allowed to go home early that day. I felt sick myself and threw up thrice. How the fuck did it happen? Why didn't she tell me anything?

  I called Aisha but her phone was switched off. Sarthak was visiting his father and was unreachable. I saw Vibhor later in the school and he seemed normal, even happy, so I asked the peon to get hi 

m to my room.

  'Sit, Vibhor,' I said to him when he appeared at my door. He sat and leaned back on his chair. 'Is there something you want to tell me?' God knows what it took for me to restrain myself.

  'What?'

  'The rumours. Is there any truth in them?'

  He laughed uncouthly. 'Of course not, sir. I expected better out of you. She's just acting out. You know she's a little crazy, right? Things are fine between us.'

  'She hasn't come to school for a couple of days.'

  'I know. But that's because Sarthak is out of town and her mother's not well.'

  'Are you sure there isn't anything else? Because if there is—'

  'Of course, I'm sure. Can I go now? Because the more time I spend inside this room the more people will think I'm a nut job. No offence.'

  'Okay, leave.'

  He got up to leave. 'And sir, it's a personal skirmish between her and me. It's better if you don't make it into a big thing.'

  'Listen, you asshole. If I find even a sliver of truth in this, I will thrust my hand into your mouth and rip you in half.'

  'Whoa. Sir. Chill. Nothing happened.'

  'For your best interest, I hope so.'

  He smiled like he didn't give a fuck, and left whistling.