Heartbreak

Brie walked into her apartment at 2 am and it was pouring rain. She took off her wet shirt and unbuckled her cargo pants, slipping them off. Leaving only her bra and panties she walked to her kitchen to cook up a midnight snack. It had been a long mission; she hadn't been home for over two months there was a light layer of dust everywhere inside her apartment.

She cooked herself some noodles and sat at her kitchen island. It was weird to see Ani again after last time. The last time she saw her she had acted impulsively and made a move on Ani. It was embarrassing to have been turned down by the woman she had fancied for so long. She knew she shouldn't have taken the initiative that night, she knew that Anai-ya was cold and emotionally closed off but she naively thought that there was a chance she could move her.

She was wrong.

If only circumstances were different Ani and her could be together but Ani had been hurt too deeply in her past, she had never recovered. Her fear of loving anyone was so great she chose the cold dark path to life, straying as far as possible from warmth, from love.

Brie sighed, having lost her appetite she walked listlessly to her bedroom and without turning on the lights threw her tired travel ridden body into bed. Closing her eyes she was reminded of what happened three months..

*THREE MONTHS AGO*

After three days of trudging through the mountains Anai-ya and Brie stopped to rest at the clearing near a riverbank. They had gone on another mission together, an important political figure's mistress had gone missing. They were hired to find her and bring her back, whether it be dead or alive.

On the third day of their assignment they received a message from their people informing them the mistress had been found unconscious in a nearby fishing village and was on her way to the nearest city hospital. Which meant they had been trudging through the mountains for nothing. They were both angry, tired and needed to rest.

They set up camp and each went off to get supplies. Brie fetched water and Anai-ya collected kindling for the fire. They worked in unison without speaking much; they'd been on a lot of missions together and had been through all kinds of situations being familiar with each other for so long there was no need for talking.

The fire cackled loudly as sparks flew into the sky while they grilled rabbit and squirrel. Brie sprinkled seasoning on the meat making sure to add enough to mask over the taste of the meat itself, knowing Anai-ya was a picky eater with the taste buds of a 7 year old she had brought food seasoning with her in her pack.

"What kind of seasoning did you bring this time Bee?" Anai-ya asked with a quirked eyebrow.

"Guess" Brie said her eyes slanted upwards as she smiled.

"Salt and pepper."

"...." Brie shot Anai-ya a grave look.

Anai-ya laughed, her sparkling golden eyes seemed to glow brighter in the darkening sky with the warm glow of the fire enhancing her perfect features.

"Ok ok, mmm McCormick Pure Lime Extract, Cajun and paprika. You always bring these. I can recognize the scent" Anai-ya said grinning.

"If you know then why ask!" Brie grumbled, rolling her eyes. She always brought these because they were Anai-ya's favorite go to seasoning mix. She practically put it on everything she could. She had a cabinet full of spices but stuck to these three all the time.

"Hey I don't know you might switch it up every now and then. I'm glad you don't though this mix is elite." Anai-ya praised.

"How could I bear to let the big boss suffer such a grievance if I switched it up. It's boss's favorite." Brie said as she winked a smile tugging at her lips.

"Flattery. So insincere, however I will accept it because I am benevolent." Anai-ya said laughing.

"You! Shut up you ungrateful brat!! Next time I won't bring anything watch how you eat unseasoned meat." Brie huffed indignation.

Anai-ya was laughing so hard her eyes glistened with tears. She moved closer to Brie and hugged her waist and looked at her in a pitiful manner.

"Bee boo don't be like this! I appreciate you so much boo! I'll never say such words again, en?" Anai-ya tilted her head and pouted her full lips, her bright eyes twinkling.

"Hmmph, look at yourself sucking up now that your meals have been threatened. Don't speak to me anymore" Brie playfully pushed Anai-ya away and turned her head, biting her lips to keep from laughing.

"How about this to show my sincerity you sleep first and I'll take first watch? Yeah?" Anai-ya asked.

Brie turned her head and glanced nonchalantly at Anai-ya expressing her consent for her to continue talking.

"And I'll be in charge of cleaning up?" Anai-ya offered grinning as her dimples deepened on her sculpted cheeks removing her hands from Brie's waist.

"You said it." Brie said as she smirked and handed a piece of meat to Anai-ya who was salivating while licking her red lips.

"Mmhmmm" Anai-ya stuffed the meat into her mouth, chewing in satisfaction.

Brie laughed watching her expressions, she was amused at how glib tongued her Ani was when she wanted something. Always knowing what to say to convince you to go her way. However, she liked this about her. They had been friends since they were kids growing up together naturally she knew of Ani's tactics. She willingly obliged to her wants and needs because she loved it when Ani smiled.

It took her a long time to realize that she was in love with her best friend. She ignored the tiny pricks in her heart when she was a teenager because she didn't know it was okay for a woman to love another woman. Growing up with old fashioned parents, naturally being gay was a taboo, it was sinful and wrong. Hence her denial, but overtime she came to realize her feelings were too deep to ignore. She was in love and there was nothing she could do to change it. She loved all the sides of Anai-ya, the good and the bad. Having never actually acted upon these feelings and watching Anai-ya be paraded around by that lunatic man she felt incredibly stifled in her heart. She yearned to hug and kiss her like he did, she yearned to hold her and have her all to herself. It was hard keeping all these feelings bottled up for so long, after so many years she wanted to know if her feelings could be reciprocated.

Watching Anai-ya eat with gusto made her happy, the meal carried on as they talked and joked until the sun had gone down completely with only the moon shining overhead.

Anai-ya was hunched over her pack and pulled out two large whiskey flasks and handed one over to her. Brie opened the flask and took a swing of the dark warm whiskey. The warmth of the drink filled her throat and stomach slowly creating a relaxing effect.

"It's been awhile since we've been on a mission together we have to make the most of it. I'll be pulling out of active missions soon." Anai-ya said learning back to look at the sky.

"It's been a long time coming, you are the boss after all there's no need for you to be on assignments anymore. I'll miss this though" Brie said lowly.

"Yeah, I just really liked being out here. Feels like home actually." Anai-ya took a big swing of whiskey and burped loudly.

"Yeah but you got a company to run you can only do so much at once. You can leave field work to the rest of us that's what we're here for." Brie said as she turned to look at Anai-ya's beautiful profile. Her face was calm, her long eyelashes would flutter every now and then her full red lips were slightly parted as she looked at the sky.

"Yeah, I guess it's just hard to move on from things you're use to doing. Plus keeping up my physique was easier this way. Now I'm going to have to workout. How boring." Anai-ya said dispiritedly

"I know Ani, but that's just part of life. It's time for your next phase time to take your boss title seriously." Brie had almost finished the whiskey and her body was starting to feel hot, her voice had become lighter

"Yeah I gotta focus my energy on the bastard now. It's only going to get harder from here. He's already getting more and more overbearing, pressuring me to move up the wedding." Anai-ya frowned in disgust, clenching her free hand into a fist.

"I don't know how you do it, he's detestable. Just looking at him makes me want to throw him over a bridge." Brie was slightly upset talking about the man. She couldn't wait for him to be out of Ani's life.

"It isn't without difficulties you know, but what's gotta been done must be done. I miss Lucian I haven't seen him in years, I want to bring him home." Anai-ya said as she took the last swing of whiskey. Her cheeks were dyed a light pink color, the warmth of the alcohol spread across her chest.

Anai-ya turned to look at Brie and smiled, "Bee, thank you for sticking by me. I know it hasn't been easy, he's hurt you too. I won't let him off on your account either. I promise."

Brie looked into Anai-ya's eyes and smiled, reaching over to hug her. They both leaned into each other and sank into silence. You could hear the rustling of leaves as the wind blew, the steady flow of the river as the waves hit the riverbank. The night was beautiful and the sounds were soothing, they both didn't realize they had been leaning into each other for a while.

"You know, when I retire I think I'll move out to a mountain home, it's so pretty at night and it's peaceful" Brie hiccuped, the whiskey was starting to take effect.

"That'd be nice, maybe I'll join you. As long as the house gets pest controlled and the spiders stay out it'll be perfect, just the two of us turning old and wrinkly together." Anai-ya mused.

"Who wants to turn old and wrinkly with you. Goodbye" Brie laughed, pinching Anai-ya's arm.

"Who doesn't. Appreciate that I'd even consider giving you this priceless opportunity to see me hunched back and wrinkly." Anai-ya broke into laughter, her rich feminine voice filling the quiet night.

"You little arrogant ass!" Brie playfully scolded.

"You call it arrogance, I call it confidence." Anai-ya turned her head and grinned at her.

"The crazy never accept they're crazy" Brie poked fun.

"Shut it, who's crazy?!"

"Obviously you"

Anai-ya was unsatisfied, she reached up and pinched Brie's waist and glowered at her.

Brie erupted into laughter, not even bothering to stop her pinching. She calmed down and hooked her arm around Anai-ya's neck and put her in a headlock.

They began to play fight rolling around on the ground laughing, the whiskey had warmed up their bodies: they didn't feel the cold breeze at all.

Brie had Anai-ya pinned down towering over her as Anai-ya tried hard to stop laughing. Her smile was so beautiful it took Brie's breath away. With the whiskey and warm atmosphere Brie decided to throw caution to the wind and leaned down slowly until she was mere inches from Anai-ya's face.

Anai-ya stifled her laughter and looked at Brie, her golden eyes had a slight misty look in them, her cheeks hurt from laughing and her clothes were in disarray after rolling around. Her eyes and smile were enticing, her red lips were slightly parted as she took in sharp breaths of air.

Brie looked into her eyes and slowly inched closer, her eyes seemed to bore deeply into Anai-ya's her heart was beating fast, as she pulled closer to her. Brie's resolve was weakening and faced with such a gorgeous sight she felt slightly helpless. In the back of her mind she knew this might be a mistake but her rational side had been muddled by the whiskey thus she paid those thoughts no mind.

As she looked into those amber eyes she decided to go for it and leaned down to kiss her. She closed her eyes as she lightly pressed her lips against Anai-ya's seemingly asking for permission. To her surprise Anai-ya did not push her away, her lips moved and kissed her back.

It felt like fireworks had exploded in Brie's mind, she took the initiative to deepen the kiss, her hands caressed Anai-ya's soft skin on her cheeks, she tilted her head and traced the outline of her lips with her tongue. Not wanting it to end she lightly bit down on Anai-ya's luscious lips, her tongue venturing inside.

The sounds of their kisses sounded in the night, the smell of lust and desire filled the air. Brie caressed Anai-ya's face, her hands slowly reaching down to grab Anai-ya's hands and wrapped them around her neck. Both of them were submersed in each other. The whiskey had warmed their hearts and their bodies, giving them the ability to let go of everything else and just live in the moment.

Their hands wandered each other's bodies, Anai-ya had slipped her hands under Brie's shirt stroking her skin lightly igniting Brie's desire.

Brie slowly kissed her way down to Anai-ya's neck leaving a trail of wet kisses on her cheek and jaw, she buried her face on the delicate and sexy collarbone sucking on it leaving a trail of purple butterflies. Her hands traced the outline of Anai-ya's body from her arms to her waist gliding slowly past her hips over her thigh and stopping at her knee. She drew small circles with her fingertips caressing it, she then wrapped her hand around it and pulled it towards her, so her leg was hoisted on her hips. She continued tracing over her body slowly as her lips ventured down further on Anai-ya's chest. She pulled away slightly and looked up at Anai-ya, her eyes bearing deeply into hers.

"Can I?" She asked softly.

Anai-ya didn't respond with words she only reached down and pulled the edges of her shirt up and slipped it off. She sat up on her elbows and nodded expressing her consent.

Brie leaned over and kissed her again this time throwing hesitation out of her mind completely. They spent the night indulging in each other.

They ended up laying in their tent naked curled up under the covers. The sun had already come up, you could hear birds chirping and the fresh scent of pine seeped in from the tents ventilation window.

Brie opened her eyes slowly she couldn't feel the warmth of Anai-ya's body anymore and she frowned. Peeling back the covers she stood up, her breasts jumping slightly at her abrupt actions. She looked down and saw that she was completely naked; it wasn't a dream, she really had sex with Anai-ya last night she thought. Her heart felt full to the brim, she reached up to touch her lips as last night replayed in her head like a movie. She was happy, she hadn't been this happy in a long time. She finally had the chance to be with the woman she loved and it was better than she could have ever imagined.

She slipped on her clothes and began to tidy up the tent, they had to go back today. Unable to hold it in much longer she speedily packed up and walked out of the tent. She saw Anai-ya tidying up their packs. She walked over to her and waited for her to look up.

"Hey, good morning are you ready?" Anai-ya said looking up.

"Yep, lets go." Brie smiled brightly, her grey eyes sparkling.

"Alright, if we head down now we'll make it by sunset." Anai-ya said, slipping her arms into the straps of her backpack. There was no visible expression on her face.

"Wait-" Brie reached out and grabbed Anai-ya's hand and looked at her biting her lip.

"About last night..."

"What about it?" Anai-ya asked, tilting her head squinting as the sun was getting brighter.

"Shouldn't we talk about it?" Brie asked, her heart wavering as she took in Anai-ya's attitude and expression.

"It was great, what of it?" Anai-ya said her tone even. It was as if it was a regular ordeal and not a breach in their friendship.

"Wait. What do you mean by that? Brie exclaimed, clenching her fists. Her heart felt suffocated, Anai-ya's nonchalant attitude was bugging her.

"I mean, we had sex, it was great. What else do you want me to mean?" Anai-ya narrowed her eyes slightly, her eyes looked bright gold against the glaring sun.

Brie's heart sank. Her hands trembled slightly, she felt a lump in her throat as she felt her eyes start to well up. Her body was frozen, her heart felt like it had cracked and spilled over. A small voice inside her head said 'What did you expect? You knew there wouldn't be any other reaction besides this. You played yourself' she looked down taking a deep breath to calm her surging emotions.

"Nothing, I meant nothing. I just wanted to make sure things wouldn't be weird now. We were drunk. Things happened. Just wanted to be clear." Brie said calmly. She shoved her feelings back down and forced herself to calm down.

"Okay, good. Let's head down"

"Alright"

*END OF FLASHBACK*

Brie's eyes watered and a single tear fell leaving a small wet droplet on her pillow case. It was her most painful memory, her heart had been broken but she had no one else to blame but herself. It wasn't Anai-ya's fault. She knew what she was getting into, Anai-ya wasn't obligated to return her feelings. She just wished that things had turned out differently but alas time had passed and everything was back to normal between them. They had returned to being close friends, no weirdness lingered over them. This was the best outcome she thought as she drifted off to sleep.