Awakening
"Wakka…"
"Wakka?"
"Wakka…"
"Wakka?"
An incessant noise rung out. Silvia swung her arm around as if to slap an alarm clock only to realize… She didn't have arms! Or an alarm clock. And while that might have stopped or shocked some people, Silvia had her priorities straight. "Five more minutes…"
"Wakka!"
"SHUT UP"
"Wakka!"
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! If I find out who you are…" Only to realize…
"Wakka!"
that the noise was coming from herself! "Wakka!??!"
"Wakka 😊"
At this point Silvia realized it was probably time to wake up from this nightmare… But five more minutes couldn't hurt right...?
"WAKKA!!!!"
"Why is it so hard to get a good night's sleep around here… Wakka ☹"
Silvia looked around only to find that she was in a maze. A rather large one at that. In front of her she saw a large blue wall… And a delicious looking hard-boiled egg! Peeled at that, how kind. With a loud
"Wakka."
She chomped forward, consuming the egg in one bite. "Nothing like a good breakfast, could use some salt though." She looked around again, only to realize she could only look around in 90-degree angles! And there wasn't a up or down. Looking at the four directions she had, she found that there was a maze wall in one direction, a egg in what she instinctively knew to be three Wakkas away from the direction she came from, and lines upon lines of eggs in the other two directions. "Well, seconds never hurt, or thirds, or fourths..?"
"Wakka! Wakka! Wakka!"
Three eggs were quickly chomped (or would the term be wakkaed?) up. "Still needs salt…" Suddenly, she heard a voice.
~Would you like to turn AutoWakka on?~
"Eh sure, why not…" "Wakka, Wakka, Wakka, Wakka, Wakka" Silvia quickly found herself charging forward, and before she knew it she ran into a wall. "AutoWakka off! AutoWakka off!" she said, rubbing her non existent bruise on her nonexistent nose with her nonexistent hands. It was a weird thing to see of course. Good thing there was nobody there to watch.
Silvia looked around and suddenly saw an extra-large egg… "Maybe it's ostrich egg?" As she proceeded to Wakka her way to the extra-large egg, she suddenly found herself confronted by something new. A large red upside-down tulip with googly eyes. Silvia blinked twice with her non existent eyes. All of a sudden she was rather jealous of the googly eyes the upside down tulip had.
Suddenly a large "Whooh Whooh Whooh" blared out, and she found the the tulip charging towards her. Too surprised to do anything Silvia merely stared at the tulip with her nonexistent eyes, quickly pondering over how she could see without them, while watching as the tulip crashed headfirst (tulip first?) into Silvia. Suddenly, Silvia found herself back where she started.
~1 life lost, 2 lives remaining~
"Huh…"
~Warning, you WILL die if you run out of lives unless you can purchase a continue~
"Ah… I guess I should… WAKKA!" Silvia quickly ate up some more eggs while looking for one of the ostrich eggs, she had a good feeling that they might be the solution to her current predicament.
A few Wakkas later, Silvia finally spotted another big egg! But at the same time, she spotted the upside-down red tulip. "Oh no you don't >:T" Silvia thought as she Wakka'd twice towards the big egg, standing (floating?) right before her. She watched as the tulip approached her, clueless as to the trap it was falling into. Just as the tulip was about to reach her Silvia gave it a grin with her existing mouth (although it couldn't grin) and
"WAKKA!"
She ran into the ostrich egg. "Ooo… This one was salted well, hats off to the chef!" She said, tipping her nonexistent hat to the chef that may or may not have existed. She turned around with an evil grin on her face (I guess she has a face; you tell me).
"Wakka!" and ate the upside-down and now blue tulip as revenge for earlier.
As she ate the tulip she thought, "Wow, and this tastes even better!" when suddenly, a pair of eyes escaped from her almighty wakka mouth. Silvia would have chased it down but at the same time a pair of notifications sounded.
~Congratulations on killing a ghost, your int has been restored by 1, it is now 2~
~+200 points, open store?~
Suddenly thinking a lot clearer, Silvia decided to wakka her way to another ostrich egg before confirming "Open the store."
~Ding, due to low intelligence and low access, subject 99921922 has been restricted to level 0 purchases in the store. Enjoy your shopping spree!~
Suddenly a bunch of locks rained down from the sky (where she couldn't look, because the whole you know, two dimentional plane thing) and bounced off her head before disappearing into nothingness. "Rude… a simple red X would have worked…"
~Advice has been taken into consideration, you are given .01 intelligence points as compensation~
Accordingly a big red X dropped down from the sky and plastered itself onto her head before dissapearing shortly. "… anyhoo… Let's look into this store!" Even with all the restrictions, the store still had a ton of things available, luckily, she found something called 'Sorting function' for 100 points. Seeing as it took her almost 2 minutes of flipping just to find the sort function, she figured it was probably worth a shot.
~Ding! Thank you for your purchase, you now have 100 points 😊~
"Yeah, yeah, let's try this" Silvia muttered. The sort function had a ton of options as well, ranging from price, popularity, most sales… but Silvia chose the tab called 'Relevance'. The .01 free intelligence was clearly pulling its weight. On relevance, there were only three things in her price range that the store rated 'Highly Relevant' the three options were: "What the Hell is Going on, The Introduction Guide for New Subjects!" for 50 points, "Relevant World Knowledge" for 50 points as well, and "Super duper basic memory fragment (Discounted)" for 100 points. Blinking (with her non-existent eyes) Silvia realized she really remembered nothing other then the fact her name was Silvia… What a pickle she was in. (Pickled eggs!)
"Hmm, that's alot of options, but… the title for the first book is really calling to me for some reason, guess I'll get that…" And having 50 points left over, she naturally bought "Relevant World Knowledge" with her remaining points.
~Ding, you haven't unlocked the inventory function yet, would you like to use your items now? Or have them delivered in a set amount of time?~
"How long would it take to read either of them?"
~"What the Hell is Going on, The Introduction Guide for New Subjects!" is estimated to take around 2-3 hours to read, "Relevant World Knowledge" is automatically added into your head and thereby much faster because it's a quick restoration of information you know but has been locked~
"Relevant world Knowledge now then I guess…" Then for the first time since her rude awakening 'this morning' Silvia felt pain. More pain then she knew could exist (Which isn't much, considering she doesn't remember what pain is, or any painful experiences). "GHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAFhaGW YOU FU***** PIECE OF SH** WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME IT WAS GOING TO HURT"
~Ding, subject has remembered restricted words on their own +1 intelligence as reward~
~Ding, subject remembered words that while expressive, are otherwise useless -.9 intelligence as a punishment~.
After a grueling session of pain, Silvia suddenly found that things a lot more sense. "Huh… I always thought the dots in pacman were tic tacs, not eggs…"