Pain!

It was a standard day in konoha, the civilians were ranting and complaining, the shinobi were sneaking and training. The civilian council was plotting, the hokage was drunk and the mc was rubbing her back like a good lover.

All was as it should be, that was until the gingers attacked! They came out of nowhere and stood atop Mount Rushmore in an attempt to satisfy their god complex. "All mighty push!!!" Sounded out through the whole village. A massive shockwave spread pushing everything away.

Most of the civilians went flying and a few shinobi tried to catch them with their jutsu and tools. Toriko however just laughed internally watching the sheeple get sent flying. Tsunade sobered you instantly and tugged his sleeve. He sighed before using sage mode and flaring chakra through his blue tattoos speeding him up incredibly.

*time in a bottle by Jim Croce* toriko began moving at speeds that would put most swift release users to shame. He watched as the world slowed and peoples expressions froze. Some ninja were moving but it was in extremely slow motion.

Toriko was secretly glad that he had made three shadow clones to act as a chakra charger. His hyper speed mode burns a lot of chakra quickly. He began running around punching all the rubble that was forming and about to impale people while mapping out the enemy which he will relay to tsunade.

After that he stopped and began changing the song that he was mentally reciting to keep his calm. * sweet dreams are made of these by eurythmics*. After that things became a blur as he began saving the people while internally going over his quicksilver playlist from his past life.

He began firing fork shield jutsu to catch people who were airborne. He took the ninja wire and rope from genin and chunin who couldn't react to his speed and used that to construct gigantic cushions using rain tarps that he stole from buildings.

Once he manages to catch a few he sped up a little more while using an earth and water Jutsu to make the ground into either a pool or a mud pool. He turned and was a nail flying towards him, it was dripping with a purple substance. He moves his head to the side and sees a root ninja? Oh he's using swift release to try and keep up, how precious.

Unfortunately he burned up all his chakra doing that~ as he slowed down to match the rest of the people toriko began to feel like an immortal vampire. In his head *i love rock and roll* just ended so he started playing *all star*

Toriko let out a toothy grin and decided to end danzo and root during the confusion. He turned the nail and poked it. At his speed that would do nothing but once he stops well with where he was aiming *sucks through his teeth*

As he arrived back at tsunade who began summoning katsuyu he allowed everything to return to normal. The people became safe as they landed softly, some noob ninja got their sandals tied together with ninja wire, a stormtrooper scream echoed from the root ninja location.

Toriko was whistling all star still when katsuyu spawned. He looked up at tsunade who was standing on top of the slug with a stoic expression. I looked up at her and popped some gum into my mouth. Minty~ "yo! (She looks down at me) I saved most of them, those gingers that killed jiraiya are here on top the kage heads. (She looks pissed) some root ninja tries attacking me when I was doing my thing so I'm gonna take them and bark out now. (She's less pissed but is now grinning evilly)."

"While I think it's a bad time I can't help but agree that the commotion would cover your work. Make it quick then come help out."

"K, those guys have the rinnegan meaning they share vision and can see through chakra induced stuff. Make a smokescreen and pick em off. Each one has a power to watch out for with the two important ones having the shockwave ability and a revival ability." She made katsuyu spread the word by dividing.

I started mumbling *one week by bare naked ladies* and rushed towards the three elders homes. What a coincidence~ they're meeting right now. Some high speed flying acupuncture needles and the two groups surrounding the base collapsed.

I used nature energy to hide my presence and entered the building *runaway babe by Bruno Mars *. Reached into the ninja pouch and pulled out some uzumaki beads. I explained to the uzumaki firs about komoye beads from black panther that can 'hack' into anything.

They loved the challenge so now I'm opening a ramen cup and tossing little beads out of it. What? I couldn't get a better container when I got these. I began firing them at every door and window I passed causing ink to appear on the walls and disappearing. They work!!!

I began walking through their house and flicking every rare art piece onto the ground causing various breaking sounds to echo out. The musical tone behind the order brought me to my next song *don't stop me now by queen*.

Entered their armoury and began looting all the chakra metal I could. After that I spun and began using nature energy to sense the rest of the houses. Hmm the attic has a different set of seals as does a room at the back of the mansion that has two life signatures inside.

I went to the attic first and flicked four beads at the corner of the door "don't,... stop.... me....now!!!" Before entering and being dazzled by all the good drip infront of me. "I'm having such a good time I'm having a ball".

Rare herbs for prolonging life and removing impurities in the tenketsu network. Money I thought in my mister krabbs voice. A zither in the room that looked like a memento kept by one of those old bastards. I began strumming the shit out of it to the song causing it to break apart.

"If you wanna have a good time give me a call".

I blurred after stealing all the things of value, I started ending the song as I breached the seal on the final room. "Don't stop me now ahhhhhhhh!!!!" I began screaming as i entered and saw the two elders of the bark division homura and koharu.

They were naked and going at it likes two dried prunes being smushed together. The old people smell accompanied by the sound of squelching made me physically feel.....PAIN!!!!!!

That ginger bastard knows nothing of my pain!!!! "Hiken!!!!!!" I screamed out sending a massive inferno towards them. The two elders turned and watched me wide eyed. My eyes captured how they got off on me spotting them before it turned to horror.

After they were fully covered in flames I vomited all over the floor. Why did I ignore the seals on the room, they were noise cancelling seals!!!!! I looked up to see if they died bad froze. One of them used some mucus jutsu and wrapped themselves in a bugger shield.

I already felt sick but now watching two naked old fuckers prepare to fight me with no decency I snapped. I went full vegeta and started blasting my palms like I was trying to wipe out cell, I was definite trying to wipe them out!!!

After I finished my barrage I began panting in relief as they were charred corpses. "Phew glad that's over. Danzo better not show me something like that." "I don't think you'll get the chance to see it." Said someone so I turned and looked at the ginger goth.

We stared each other down and I said "no matter what you say, my pain a few seconds ago, was much greater than yours" the big ginges lips twitched before it popped black spikes and rushed me. Next song? I may have lost the mood a second ago but I can't help put feel the need. *we will rock you!!!*