Chapter 4: The Dreamer

Hale experienced a flood of emotions upon realizing his own consciousness. At first his heart raced as a symptom of the dream, and he did a frenzied examination of his surroundings in order to slow his heart rate and breathing. Once he was fully aware of his current position in his room, in his bed and with a friend, he breathed in deeply and felt the muscles in his body relax. This relaxation didn't last long, however when Hale realized how this must have looked to Jordan. He pulled the covers aside and planted his feet firmly on the ground.

He remembered hazily that Jordan had asked him a question but he was too embarrassed at the moment to ask what it had been. He leaned over, elbows on his knees and head in his hands and wished desperately to feel as if no one could see him.

"Are you okay, brother?" Jordan asked seriously.

"What? Oh, um yeah. I'm sorry, I've just been having some intense dreams lately." Hale shrugged and stood, hoping this would reassure Jordan that there was nothing further to be discussed, but with unsatisfactory results.

"Dreams, huh?" Jordan asked with a frown. "What about?"

"Nothing, really. I don't even really remember them after I wake up," Hale lied. He wasn't exactly sure why he lied to Jordan, the dreams weren't explicit or even very long and yet Hale felt a sort of self conscious anxiety about having them.

"It seemed pretty intense," Jordan said, "You should keep a dream journal, there might be something you can learn from these dreams."

"Like what? They're just dreams, Jordan." Hale retorted.

"Dreams are powerful tools, Hale." Jordan insisted, "God uses dreams numerous times in scripture to teach His people about His plan."

Hale felt tense at the mention of the prophetic dreams of scripture. Jordan was all about the spirit communicating with the church in eccentric ways and believed strongly that things like dreams are to be valued and not ignored, but it all felt a little too…"spiritual" for Hale. Even though Hale believed that God used to communicate this way to prophets, he honestly didn't think God used such explicit or obvious methods anymore and this was a conversation Hale had had many times with Jordan. In his opinion, dreams were just dreams and he advised Jordan to be careful about assuming he knew what God wanted him to do based on a dream.

"God must have a really weird plan for me, then." Hale suggested lightheartedly.

"I thought you said you didn't remember the dream." Jordan says.

"Yeah, I mean not really, there were kids and a hallway that would never end." Hale said, trying to get Jordan to drop it. The dreams felt like a secret to Hale and he has no interest in sharing them with Jordan, especially because of Jordan's position on dreams. If Jordan knew it was a recurring dream, he would flip his lid.

To his relief this seemed to satisfy Jordan and he received a chuckle in response. "Maybe God is trying to warn you about the uphill battle of parenting." He suggested.

"Yeah, maybe" Haled replied with a smile, "But kids aren't exactly in the plan at this point."

"Oh, so there's gonna be a schedule for that too?" Jordan asks with the rise of an eyebrow.

"Of course, it's like you've never even met me." Hale teased.

The two roommates got ready for the day and headed down to the courtyard to get an early breakfast from the coffee shop across from the dorms. Hale didn't usually enjoy coffee but he felt an urgent need for it that morning in order to get through the day without dozing off. It was Sunday morning which meant there would be a sermon in the main sanctuary on campus which would also be an orientation for the freshman.

Dr. Ernest Jacobson was both the main speaker for the school and also one of its most revered professors. He had gotten his masters of divinity and doctorate in Theology at 17 years old and taught most of the upperclassmen and graduate students in one way or another. Many of the professors used curriculum written or previously taught by him so even students who weren't his directly still benefited from his teaching. Hale had always respected his father as Pastor, but there was a passion behind Dr. Jacobson's teaching that excited Hale about the job beyond simply explaining the logical pros and cons of it. When Dr. Jacobson spoke, Hale felt confident in his leadership and speaking abilities so he was quick to grab a seat toward the front of the massive sanctuary; he could use some confidence this morning. Confidence is the exact opposite of what he received during that morning's sermon. As Dr. Jacobson walked onto the stage there was thunderous applause and then he opened in prayer.

The sermon was about listening to God's calling. Hale received a pointed look from Jordan but he pretended not to notice. He sat in disquieted silence for the rest of the hour long sermon/orientation and when Dr. Jacobson ended in prayer and released the students, Hale stood up so fast he nearly toppled over. He quickly got his bearings and walked out of the hall. Once outside, Hale noticed that Jordan was no longer behind him and decided against waiting for him, so he went on to confirm his schedule with the admissions office. On the way there his phone vibrated and alerted him to a new text message from Grace:

Hey Hon, sorry I didn't get your call last night. Talk tonight? <3

Hale felt a wave of relief upon hearing from her and quickly responded that he would call at 7 o'clock her time to which he revived an excited 'Okie dokie!' with multiple smiley face emojis. Her excitement validated him in ways a sermon never could and he stood tall the rest of the day. Hale spent the rest of the day finding all his classrooms and catching up with classmates from previous semesters. He didn't see Jordan again until he got back to the dorm.

"Where have you been today? I didn't see you after church this morning." Hale says.

"Oh well I wanted an opportunity to talk to Dr. Jacobson afterwards." This took Hale by surprise. Dr. Jacobson was very well known, he was like a campus celebrity and Hale knew he would not have the courage to just approach the man unprompted. The roommates were both starting their junior year which meant they would now begin to take classes from Dr. Jacobson so Hale figured he would have plenty of opportunities to speak to him without ambushing him after assembly.

"And did you?" Hale asked nonchalantly.

"I did, and I think this semester is going to be a cinch." Jordan says confidently.

"Why, because you talked to Jacobson once?" Hale scoffed, "If I had known that was all it took I wouldn't have wasted any of my last semesters studying."

"He asked about you, brother. You should have stayed." Jordan said, ignoring Hale's comments.

"He asked about me? How does he even know about me?" Hale asked with some amount of anxiety at the thought that Dr. Jacobson knew his name. Hale always tended to fly under the radar of his professors and he liked it that way.

"He knows all the students in his class, apparently. He tried to meet them all before the first day of class and was disappointed that you left so soon afterwards." Jordan stated.

"He's gotta have over a thousand students, no way he could meet them all. I'm sure I wasn't the only one who missed the opportunity." Hale said with a shrug.

"Why did you leave so soon after? He asked but I didn't have an answer for him." Jordan said curiously.

Another shrug from Hale, "I just wanted to confirm my schedule with admissions, get a head start on finding the classrooms and talk to Grace a little."

"Ah yes, young love." Jordan sighed wistfully. "How is the love of your life?"

"Fine, In fact I promised her I'd call around now, so if you'll excuse me." Hale said dismissively, taking a step out into the hallway. It was actually a whole hour earlier than he had said he would call, but Hale was feeling tired after not having slept well and thought it would be better to call sooner rather than later. The phone rang only twice before he received a cheerful "Hello?" from the other end.

Hale's posture visibly relaxed upon hearing her voice and quickly responded, "Grace."

There was a long pause and Hale heard some shuffling before she spoke again, "Hale, honey, I thought you weren't going to call until 7."

"Oh yeah," Hale said, "I just had some free time earlier and couldn't wait to talk to you." He expected a giggle or some affirmation that his decision was romantic but all he heard was a sigh. "I can call later." He offered quickly.

"No, no" Grace responded, "Now works, you just surprised me is all, sweetness. How is it over there?" she asked.

"Oh, good. It's like I said in my message, Jordan is the same as always. I'm all checked in and ready to start junior year in the morning." He started to tell her about his expectations for the semester and about the sermon from that morning until he realized he had been talking for longer than he was comfortable with and hadn't heard anything from Grace. "Grace?" he asked.

"Yes, I'm here. It sounds like you're all prepared for the semester as long as you can get on that professors' good side. I'm so proud of you honey," She said, sounding tired.

"Is everything okay?" Hale asks suddenly.

"Oh yeah, everything is fine here, just spending time with both the families before the semester begins and everything gets crazy." She said simply.

"You've talked to my parents today?" Hale asked.

"Yeah, no worries, your mom says she misses you so you should probably give her a call after me." Hale nodded wordlessly, waiting for Grace to continue but she didn't.

"Oh um, yeah. I will." Another pause that lasted a little too long. "How are you?" he asked.

"Fine, sweetness, thank you for asking. Just can't wait to see my 'more than' boyfriend back home again." She said with a chuckle.

"More than boyfriend?" Hale asked, amused.

"Well yeah, you know, not quite engaged, but not just dating either. I don't think they have a title for that yet." She said.

"Yeah I guess boyfriend and girlfriend doesn't quite cut it anymore." Hale responded. The next pause was uncomfortable and he felt like Grace was holding something back. "I love you." Hale says suddenly, wanting to get this uncomfortable disconnect to go away, but he was met with only silence so he waited. He would not speak until she spoke again.

"I got a lot of compliments on the ring today." Grace said after a while.

"Good, I hope you got to show it off and make all your friends jealous." Hale says with a smile.

"They all asked when the wedding was and I had to remind them that we aren't engaged just...promised." Grace's tone of voice was not cheerful but neither was it bitter, it was like she was simply stating some fact of the universe that could never be changed.

"Well, I hope they weren't too disappointed," Hale says, "The Reyes-Hastings wedding will be coming soon to a chapel near them."

"They all congratulated me and complimented your propriety." Grace continued, ignoring Hale's comment. "We've always been good at that, huh?"

"Oh yes, always." Hale responds "We should teach a class at this point." This received a small chuckle from Grace which made Hale relax a little. "Speaking of, did you get a chance to listen to that podcast my dad suggested?"

Hale heard a soft groan from the other end, "Oh no, I'm sorry honey, I've just been a little preoccupied lately. I'll try to listen to it this week and then we'll have lots to talk about next weekend, okay?"

"Don't stress about it, Grace." Hale reassured, "We'll have lots to talk about anyway."

"Of course." Grace affirmed, "Well, I'm glad everything is going well, I'll be praying for your first week back to school. I'm going to have to go downstairs and help my mom with dinner soon so I think I'll let you go."

"Okay," Hale said, "I love you."

"Yeah me too," she said and then Hale heard a click from the other end. Hale felt uneasy about their conversation, Grace had seemed distant and even upset at him. He couldn't imagine what she could be upset with him about, and decided to attribute it to her missing him. He started down at his phone, feeling like his center of gravity had shifted slightly. He remembered suddenly that Grace had suggested giving his mother a call and he thought she could probably make him feel better about the whole thing.

His mother picked up the phone after the first ring, "Hale!" She exclaimed.

"Hi Mom," Hale said with a chuckle at his mother's enthusiasm. "Just got settled and wanted to hear how everything has been going these past two days."

"Oh it's all falling apart like it always does when you're away, baby." His mother teased.

"Have you talked to Grace today?" Hale asked.

"I did, in fact. Oh honey, she's the daughter I never had." His mother gushed. "I mean it, Hale, she's wonderful. We had lunch together this afternoon."

"How sweet, I hope you ladies had a good chat." Hale said sincerely.

"Oh we did. We had a lot to discuss after what you brother pulled this morning." Mrs. Reyes said, which made Hale groan.

"What'd he do this time?"

"Oh the usual, he stayed out all night after doing God knows what and then stumbled in the door at some ungodly hour. It was lucky that Grace was up early this morning and brought him back home." His mother said with a sigh

"Grace brought him home this morning?" Hale asked, feeling relieved. He wasn't sure Grace had ever seen Michael when he got really bad. It was enough to shake anyone up.

"Yes and he was about ready to pass out the way he was holding on to her." Another deep sigh, "I worry about him all the time," his mother continued, "But Grace has really stepped into your role as his big sibling while you're away. We got lunch so I could thank her and apologize for Michael's behavior."

"Well I'd say that explains it." Hale said. "I just got off the phone with her and she seemed a little shaken, and I was worried it was something I had done."

"Oh poor dear," His mother sighed, "She has such a beautiful heart."

"Yeah she does, I'm really lucky to have her." Hale said, regaining some confidence.

"And don't you ever forget it!" His mother said with a smile.

"I won't. Is Michael okay?" Hale asked with concern.

"Oh yes, he just slept through the day to avoid speaking with your father who was furious this morning." His mother said. "But your father was too busy working with some new members to really sit down and talk to him today."

"New members, huh? That's exciting." Hale said.

"Oh it's a sad story, really. It's this mother and her two little children, a girl and a boy. The mother has struggled with drugs and everything else under the sun but is trying to turn things around for the children. They're in between homes at the moment, staying with a brother or cousin I think, until she can get back on her feet." His mother recounted shamelessly everything she had learned about the woman and her family and it started to make Hale sad. It's hard to react properly to every story of poverty and despair that crosses the threshold of his father's church, but this one seemed sadder and more moving than the rest. "The little girl is practically raising that brother of hers and she can't be any more 11 or 12 herself."

"That's awful," Hale said sincerely, "How is the mother doing? Do you think she'll step up for the kids?"

His mother hesitated and then responded with a sigh, "It's too soon to tell. I know her heart is in the right place, but addiction is not something that just be prayed away, she's gotta start doing the hard work for those little angels, but obviously we will do everything we can to help her along that road."

"Well, I'll be praying over that situation." He said, "Good talking to you momma, talk to you again soon."

"Goodnight sweetheart, talk to you soon!" His mother exclaimed before hanging up the phone.

It sounded like there was some chaos happening at home, but not an unusual or unfamiliar chaos. Despite all the little problems, he got comfort from knowing that everything was still going according to plan.