Four: Fight for a Breath

Matthew: I had to go hours of my day without seeing her cute little blue snap icon pop up with a notification saying that she is typing. Where I was already out of school, she went every day. Dreading it. She hated it. I didn't know anyone could hate something as much as she did. But like everything else this woman did, she kept placing me in awe.

Adrian kept bugging me. He wasn't bugging me really. He is my best friend. He is Renee's brother. He played on my computer while I sat there on the phone with her. She is irreplaceable.

Her laugh rang though and her smile cut my wrists. I was at her very disposal. I couldn't stop even if I wanted to. She had me wrapped around her finger. Anything she wanted or anything she needed I was the one who would be there to give it.

She hid her past well. But my intentions were an open book. I wanted to know all of her. Her good. Her bad. And her everything. I wanted to know everything she buried in the past.

Me: Babe?

I waited. For like two minutes. She normally responds by now. It is four o'clock in the afternoon. She is home by now. I tried again. It says she was just online.

Me: Baby girl are you there? Is everything ok?

This time she messaged back fast.

Renee: I can't talk right now. I gtg. Ttyl.

Since I've met her I've learned a few things, I'm not the smartest. And this wasn't like her.

"Adrian? Text your sister. Ask her if everything is all right." I ask Adrian from the closet door.

"Ok, bro." He said without hesitation.

He sent the message. One minute. Two minutes. Three minutes. And so on. Time went by until it was twenty minutes later. She still hasn't responded. I called her. No answer. I texted her. No reply.

I took Adrian's phone and called her. No answer. I texted her from his phone. No reply. I went and got my mom's phone. And my sisters. No answer and no reply.

"Adrian, why isn't your sister answering or replying to my calls and texts?" I asked.

By this time I was already worried. It has been three and a half hours since she sent me the last text. I called into work told them that I was taking the night off that I had important things to deal with. This girl was more than my girlfriend. She was my wife. She told me that she has fallen in love with me and if I were to get down on one knee, that she would say yes before I could even ask.

At first, I didn't get it. But then it clicked.

"Wait what?" I had asked her.

"If you were to ask me right now to marry you, I wouldn't hesitate to say yes. I would say yes before you even ask." Her voice faded into the back of my mind, bringing me back to reality. Bringing me back to what Adrian was saying. He was panicking. Which only made me panic even more. And I didn't even know what we were panicking over.

"Matthew turn the t.v on. Now. Go to the news." Adrian said really fast. And very demanding.

I did what he told me to do only to have my stomach drop to the floor.

The News Anchor Lady was standing in front of a car crash accident. I didn't even bother to try and listen to what she was saying. I kept looking around in the background hoping not to see what I knew I would eventually.

I couldn't hear anything besides my blood running through my veins and my heartbeat trying to rase a roadrunner.

Adrian sat in the background saying something grabbing me by the shoulder trying to capture my attention.

"Matthew, my mom just called. I got to go." He didn't say anything else. Just grabbed his jacket and ran as fast as he could put the front door. Before he pulled out of the parking lot, I ran after him.

"Is this about Renee?" That was all I said. He didn't answer, just drove away.

I didn't know what to do. I didn't know what to say. I called her over and over again. I texted her so many times my hand got a few cramps. She wouldn't answer or reply!

I kept watching the news until my phone rang. I jumped, picking it up in a hurry.

"Renee? Baby are you ok?" I asked without even asking or checking collar I.D.

It wasn't her... I don't know who this person is. "This is not Renee. This is Nurse Pearson from Waves-Star Hospital. I'm calling in regards to a Miss. Kerce. This number was the only number in her emergency contacts. Who is this that I am speaking with?"

I started freaking out. Why the fuck was this lady calling me saying that I was in her emergency contacts? What happened!?

"I'm her boyfriend, Matthew. Is something wrong? What happened?"

I know this lady heard the pain and panic in my voice. Damn, I even heard it.

"Sir, I need you to come to the hospital. Renee has been in an accident. There will be more information given once you arrive." And with that, she hung up to the Code Blue siren in the distance. That only made me worried even more.

Damn it why the hell did I say, boyfriend? She is not my girlfriend. She is so much more than that. I am her husband. And she is my wife. Why didn't I claim that out loud? Now is not the time to be self pitiful.

I got my jacket, hat, and keys and I was out the door faster than a jackrabbit on steroids.

I drove a little over the speed limit, with the help of a cop who was leading the way. The rain was getting heavier as I kept going.

Twenty minutes later: I ran into the hospital expecting there to be a receptionist. Nope. Not a single one!

I was able to stop a doctor, which was no need. I saw Adrian standing next to the bed. I called out to him.

"Adrian!" He didn't move. I got closer and closer. Hoping that Renee was laying in that bed breathing with a strong heartbeat. That wasn't the situation. Renee and Adrian's mother were also in the accident. She died about forty-five minutes ago.

My eyes darted around the room. Scanning the beds of people who were involved in the wreck. Not one of them was Renee.

"Adrian where is your sister?" I asked him. He pointed over to an empty bed and looked around. She wasn't there. He got up and headed for a nursing station. He asked politely where she was. No one knew.

A Code Red went off. Doctors and nurses ran out of rooms and were headed to the stare case. I followed them. They were headed to the roof. They ran faster. I ran faster. We made it to the top and were out the door.

The rain was hard. It felt like ice. I looked around, and there she was. Renee was standing on the edge. The doctors coaxed their way to her. But it wasn't working. She wasn't herself. Her eyes weren't dark hazel with black rims like they normally were. They were bright blue with a white ring near the center.

I walked calmly, she had a few scratches and scrapes on her and her arm was bleeding from where the i.v had been torn out. She looked up. She turned around looked down at all of us. Her hospital gown was starting to flow with the rain. Her thighs touched. Thank God. I don't need the world to see her like that. She looked at me.

Her eyes flashed from the blue back to her old eyes for less then a second. I could feel her fear. They flashed back to blue. She smiled lightly, through her arms out at her sides and looked up again, and fell backward.

I ran too her screaming.

"No!" I tried to reach for her. She was too far out of my reach. Pure terror took over my body, my facial expressions, everything, while I watched her beautifully thick body fall to the ground below.