I Love You/Me

I know i say i love you

every chance youll give me

but what i never really imagined

is what those i love yous meant

I say a joke at your expense

just to have an excuse 

to say those three words

and just to hear them back

i tell myself its harmless

that i say the words to everyone

its normal 

it has to be

until i started craving it

my soul screams

and reaches out for yours

like a junkie 

reaching for its last fix

and the only thing that cures me

is hearing those cursed words

leave your blessed lips

I told myself i wouldnt fall

That id fix myself first 

Become a better me

but ive never loved myself more

and cherished existence more

than i do when im around you

you not only gave me the tools to heal

but to also learn to be okay alone

because even though i crave your affection

you make me crave my own affection more

you make me realize that 

with or without you

ill be okay

you taught me thats its okay

to love my imperfections 

and instilled the will i needed

to finally be at peace with myself