Are You Avoiding Me?

I arrived at the apartment, heart still beating so fast. What a dumb I am, it was so obvious I'm avoiding him. Why am I avoiding him? Oh, it's because he always kiss me when he has the chance. And I don't like it. I really think it's not good for my mental and emotional health.

I sighed and slammed my body on my bed without even taking off my shoes. I'm just so tired even though I basically did nothing. My mind is a brewing storm right now. I decided to pick up my bag and removed the materials inside. I guess, I really can't paint for a while.

I immediately stood up as soon as I heard my door banging. I was so surprised, my heart is beating so fast.

"Maddison!" Travis called. I knew he would find out that I'm avoiding him.

What am I gonna do? Play dead? Tell him I'm not here? Am I just so dumb at everything that I don't know what to do in this kind of situation. I thought I just suck at algebra. I wasn't oriented with this kind of shits.

Oh, God. Help me.

"Maddison! I know you're in there!" he continued, still banging my door. And I think any second now, he will literally broke it if I don't show up.

I took a very deep breath and tried to calm myself. I can do this. I just have to act dumb and tell him there's nothing wrong. I slowly opened the door and I was welcomed by his piercing gaze. If only his glares could kill, I'm a dead meat by now.

"What can I do for you? Don't you know how to knock? Don't just bang someone's door when you're mad," I directly told him.

And I just wanted to pat myself at the back for saying those words to him, because I felt so brave, for the first time in a while. I looked at him acting like I'm so confused. He closed his eyes and took a very deep breath. And for a moment, I just want to melt when he opened his eyes and his almond eyes looked at mine. His eyes are calm, and so he is.

"She's not my girlfriend, she just happened to be bored and she's itching so she called me. But I swear to God, we never had sex, again," he explained. I was caught off guard with his explanation.

I blinked and blinked for the nth time, trying to process what he just told me. What is he trying to imply? I'll just stick to my plan to act dumb, but I was not expecting this. I thought he's going to ask me why am I avoiding him and the likes.

"So? What are you trying to say?"

He sighed and took a step forward. He dead ass ignored me and came in to my apartment and closed the damn door. He went to the living room and so I followed him. He was just there, standing while his shoulders are drastically moving up and down along with his heavy breaths.

Out of my wit, I took a step back when he suddenly faced me. Just what on earth is he doing?

"Are you avoiding me?" and he finally asked it. The question I've been trying to avoid but I already planned something about this.

I showed him the fakest smile he's ever seen. "Who's avoiding who?"

He looked at me in disbelief. "Don't play dumb on me, Maddison. I know you're avoiding me."

"So, why are you asking me if you already knew I'm avoiding you. Not that I'm avoiding you, it's not like that. I'm not avoiding you or whatever," I said, defensively.

And poof! I just got caught. Because he just smiled at me like crazy, and his smile is driving me crazy. Just when did he learnt to smile like that in front of me? That smile, that killer smile that I love.

"So, you're avoiding me," he repeated, emphasizing it.

"And why would I do that?" I asked him with my very serious face, hoping it will work.

"Tell me, Maddison. Am I confusing you?"

"The hell with that, Travis. Just get straight to the point."

He brushed both his hands across his handsome face and I'm about to fantasize him which is not very good. He took a step forward and held my shoulders. He forced my body to face him.

He was just looking at me directly to my eyes, as if he can see right through me. Those almond eyes, his eyes have always been so mesmerizing, I can't resist to look at it. It's as if, his eyes holds a lot of words that he can not tell, so he tells it with his eyes instead, which everyone fails to see. I still remember the night at the party, when those eyes looked so lost. He was so soft that night, and I saw that look again, right now.

"I'm sorry if I confuse you," he started. He just started spitting those words but my heart is beating super fast.

"I'm sorry because I made you feel that way. I know it's been bothering you a lot, because I can tell," he added.

I can feel the sincerity in his voice and his ears are just so red right now. He really is doing this?

"What are you trying to do, Travis?"

"I'm going to do it. Even if Neo and everyone gets in the way, I'm going to do it. I promise, I'll make you safe," he said and smiled from ear to ear.

What is he trying to do that even Neo would get in the way? Am I still playing dumb or am I just scared to admit that I know what he's trying to do, but I'm not just sure of it.

Should I prepare myself for some heartaches? Because, I am really feeling something for him, and if he's doing this just because I am confused and unsure of what to do, and he just wants me to clear my mind, then I don't know anymore. I just have to prepare myself for any dramas.