Ch110. A surprise for Kakashi

Kakashi Hatake entered the ninja academy, feeling a bit smug as he wondered what kind of faces his students were going to make when he showed up three hours late.

The reactions were the best part of his behaviour. Annoying people warmed his cold heart.

Of course, this was for their own good!

He had to set the precedent and give them a small taste of what was to come. If they were any smart, like the files of his kunoichi-to-be and his Uchiha declared they were, then they would quickly realize this fact.

He would give it a week. Even Naruto should catch on by then. If not, then they were just too stupid for any mentally demanding ninja work, and he would put it down in their file.

No worries, the village needed its pack mules and frontline fighters.

Naturally, if his students did catch on and decided to come three hours late, like he was going to do? Well, then he would have a good reason to punish them!

He felt all giddy just thinking of the possibility. The smart ones were at times even more bullyable than the idiots.

To be fair, the correct answer was to show up on time and spend the three hours exercising, training, and bonding with their teammates. But he would not be telling them that. A bond strong enough to withstand their workline needed to come together naturally. It couldn't be forced.

Besides, Kakashi was not here to make them into besties. He was here to bully them into becoming competent chunin-level ninjas who can work together in the next few years.

This was going to be a piece of cake. A nice little unwanted vacation.

As he turned the corner and saw the door to the classroom where his future students were waiting for him, he chuckled as he saw the chalk eraser between the door and the frame.

For a moment, he stopped and contemplated what approach he should take, but then he just shrugged. He decided to face it head-on and headbutt the chalk eraser.

Mostly because he just wanted to screw with Sasuke's head. The boy might have mellowed down quite a bit in the recent months he spent under Gai.

Kakashi involuntarily shuddered.

But his ambition had not changed, and getting a seemingly incompetent teacher was definitely going to eat at him for the rest of the day.

What kind of jonin wouldn't notice or dodge a chalk eraser prank anyway, right?

Well, this one!

Kakashi lazily opened the door and slightly leaned forward just so the chalk eraser fell straight on top of his hair. His lips under his mask stretched into a small smirk as he started turning his head toward his future students while speaking.

"My first impression of you is-"

He started, but then his eyes landed on three teenagers, all wearing green spandex with bowl haircuts, and his jaw suddenly went slack from the sheer horror that pulsed through his body.

"-what in the actual fuck!?"

He involuntarily muttered aloud with a shudder.

But Kakashi was not a jonin for nothing. He quickly gathered his wits and shook off his discomfort. He gave the three new genins a strained eyesmile.

"Er... I am sorry. Wrong room. Don't mind me. Bye."

With a hurried wave of his hand, he hurriedly slammed the door shut, deciding that he needed some calm and quiet mourning time in front of the memorial stone to recuperate from the induced mental damage.

He started to regret being greedy and asking for both Naruto and Sasuke. He did not sign up for this.

Giving the three green monstrosities three more hours to calm down and change their clothes sounded like a good idea.

...

Back at Ren's apartment, the three watching people burst out into laughter.

"Have you seen his face?" Ino giddily exclaimed before looking at Ren. "How did you manage that?"

"I bribed Sasuke with two C-rank lightning techniques and Naruto with one C-rank wind technique." Ren smirked. It wasn't even that hard to persuade them. The boys practically jumped at the opportunity to get them some jutsu.

"Nothing for Sakura?" Hinata curiously asked, and Ren just shrugged.

"Sasuke's momentary attention is enough of a reward for her." He answered. "I simply told Sasuke he needs to get her to do this. That's why he is getting two jutsu and Naruto only one."

"Harsh but true." Ino mumbled, a bit miffed about it, but she had to admit, Sakura was one of the girls who would do this for free if Sasuke asked.

...

Kakashi threw one last look at the closed door with a complicated expression. 

Gai was alright. He liked the guy. 

But having three mini-Gais in a team? Kakashi would not survive that! Maybe he could ask the Hokage for help? He couldn't fail them. Naruto and Sasuke were too valuable for the village. And he did owe it to Obito and his sense to train their kids. But on the other hand... the green spandex.

"Ugh." Kakashi leaned on the nearby wall, feeling that not even S-rank missions managed to put him in this kind of dilemma.

It was then that, with the corner of his eye, he noticed a small white monkey standing in the middle of the hall, looking at him. He tensed and turned toward it with trepidation rising in him as the monkey raised a signboard.

'Get back in there, Kakashi.' was written on said signboard.

There was only one person in Konoha using monkey summons. And Kakashi couldn't really say no to an order from him.

"Must I?" He exasperatedly asked, looking toward the ceiling.

But the monkey was prepared, and after a bit of shuffling, it pulled another signboard that said a simple 'Yes' while it started to laugh at him.

"Can I at least take another hour to clear my mind?" Kakashi tried to negotiate, only to have a signboard with 'No' thrown at him.

"But..." He started to complain as he ducked under the thrown signboard, but the monkey was long gone by then. In its place was only one last signboard lying on the floor.

Kakashi approached it and read it.

'You asked for Naruto and Sasuke. You got them. Now deal with it.'

Looking at it, Kakashi started to regret failing so many teams during the previous years. Maybe if he had passed one of them, he wouldn't have been so deep in shit right now.

Well, nothing to it. He would just have to beat the Gai-ness out of his students.

It was for the greater good of Konoha's continued sanity.

...

Back in his apartment, Ren turned off the feed from the detection barrier and sighed in satisfaction. Unfortunately, he did not make any arrangements for the introductions.

It would have been hilarious if all three of Kakashi's new students proclaimed a desire to become some kind of great youthful beast of Konoha.

It was a missed opportunity that Ren was going to regret for a few days at least.

"We are not going to watch their test?" Ino asked, leaning on Ren's shoulder. Hinata was not present in the room. She went to start making dinner around the time Kakashi had a signboard thrown at his face.

"Nah. They will have their test tomorrow." Ren shook his head. "And you two will be with your teams."

He decided to keep the recording function of the barrier quiet for now. His girl might be blonde, but she was sharp enough to connect Anko and Kurenai's bathroom and the recording function together to come to the correct conclusion.

There was no need to make the Hokage look worse in her eyes. To a small degree, Ren sympathized with the man. He was an old widower in a world with no porn outside of Jiraiya's trashy novels.

And he was too honorable to order Yugao Uzuki to get under his table.

Which was a good thing. A bit of voyeurism was far from the worst the Hokage could have done. Ren was going to check the set observation points. If only to get some nice blackmail he was most likely never going to use anyway.

He was curious now.

But he was going to spy on Kurenai or Anko showering, or try pulling Jirayia by watching the bathhouse. Why would he? He just had to ask, and Ino, Hinata, or even both would jump into bed with him.

Instead, the remote controller signified something much more important to him. It was a tool to keep track of Danzo and some other political animals in the village.

With the Daimyo arriving in Konoha in the coming week, Ren had his work cut out for him. It was time for him to make some moves. He needed to wiggle his way into a more secure political position in the village. He needed to make allies and deals with some clans. And he needed to show that his continued presence in the village was important for something more than being just another strong ninja.

He... was going to establish a new clan.

And he didn't cause such a massive uproar in the Land of Fire that even the Daimyo had to come to Konoha, just for the heck of it. A distraction was useless if there was no follow-up action.

With Danzo and the council more or less distracted by the bigger fish that was the Daimyo for the next month or two, and with his girls now having their own teams, which gave Ren a lot of free time, this was the best time to act for him.

---

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