S4 Episode 17- It’s all my fault:

My mouth gaped open after hearing everything. I couldn't believe that I had been brought up and fed with lies.

Was everything about me a lie?

I slowly got up, looking him in the eyes with tears. "I forgive you. But I swear if you're lying. Other than that, I need your help."

After explaining all that had happened at Creeperville, he couldn't cope.

Great.

The one time I saw my real dad, I had broken him, once again, into a mental state. How fun(!)

"You're saying that you, along with four others, followed one person into a bloody abandoned amusement park?"

"Yes."

"ARE YOU SMART OR STUPID?"

"God help me," I muttered under my breath. "This isn't the time for yelling. It's time for you to help me. To be useful for the first time in my life since you left." I suddenly blurted out.

His smile turned into a deep frown.

I just dug myself a grave.

"I-I didn't mean it like that, dad... I-it just kind of-"

"It's fine. Have fun helping out your friends. I'm sure you'll survive. You've managed all this way without me. What difference will it make without me?" And within that instant, he got his jacket, pulled out a cigarette before lighting it and walked out.

"Dang it." I groaned. Now I WAS alone. But I couldn't give in, not yet. Beomgyu, Huening Kai, Soobin, Yeonjun, they were all relying on me.

I couldn't let them down.

That's if they're not dead already. The thought of my friends dying is enough to make me shudder with guilt.

I laid down thinking aloud to myself, how do I save them? 

After numerous hours of thinking and thinking, I came to a straightforward conclusion: I had nothing.

After minutes upon minutes, I let myself starve and wander in my thoughts restlessly.

Was I this stupid? 

I was wrong about Soobin. He wasn't the one that caused all this harm. I was going to be the one who did that instead. It was going to be my fault for leaving them so long that they wind up dead. 

What on Earth was my plan? I had no idea whatsoever. I just had to go in and pray for the best. Fate couldn't be against me. Right?

I shouldn't jinx that. 

I sighed before grabbing my jacket. Was I doing the right thing by going back?

Calling a Taxi over, the driver searched the location only for it to be non-existent.

My eyes widened.

No.

"Give me that," I said stubbornly, grabbing the GPS out of his hand and searching up the postcode aggressively.

In relief, I handed it back to him.

"You idiot. You spelt it wrong," I gave it back, giving him a death glare.

I saw him trembling as he placed it back onto the holder, but I had every right to be scared.

Imagining the location was not available? I'd never lived.

After a few hours of staring out into the once peaceful city, I arrived.

We arrived at the place that haunted and tortured us for days on repeat. The one and only, Creeperville. 

Why was I here again? My head started banging against my skull as my knees broke down and soon gave up on me. 

No.

I want to leave. 

I'll keep my promise.

Turning back, I realised that everything had disappeared. The taxi driver was no longer there. It was just me and the dark midnight sky, just the silence.

And me. 

I gulped as I faced a clown in the distance staring at me giddily with joy.

How is this place still not abandoned?!

He had dressed in blood red with a mix of the white-coloured loose jumpsuit, perfectly cut at the ankles. The frilled design rushing down to his shoes was enough to make a murderer's heart stop beating. 

I felt deluded. Was it just me seeing this? Or was it Huening Kai, waiting to get his revenge on me for all I've done, in some ridiculous costume he found on the floor?

Classic Huening.

Tilting its head, it continued staring at me. The knife, dripping with fresh blood, made my eyes linger on it, which they clutched so tightly in their hands.

I wasn't so sure that was him anymore...

I NEEDED to go...

NOW.

Dashing, I ran over to the entrance. I would rather die from torture than that maniac. Hopping over the fence, I slowed and looked down, gradually, taking a good look around the familiar rides, the Ferris wheel in particular.

I saw it all.

It reminded me of all the events we had to endure in the past-

Gazing at my phone, I remembered.

No service. Right. 

Sighing, I looked back at the darkness as I made my way toward the House of Mirrors. Tears rolled down as I twisted left and right like a child lost in a maze.

Where are you, Yeonjun?

My breaths became heavier and heavier as I remembered Kai mentioning that Yeonjun was stuck in a mirror previously, but my stupid self didn't want to believe it.

I SHOULD'VE!

If I did, maybe, just maybe, we wouldn't be in this situation, all split up. 

It was all my fault.

All of it.

I had failed everyone. I can't even find Yeonjun.

For God's sake!...

But then, that's when I saw him.

His body withered away in the newly cleansed mirror like a beautiful rose - only dead.

My body collapsed whilst watching his dead limbs fall loose. How could I have done this to him?

Dried blood spread against the floor, stains all across the mirror. 

"WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?!" I exclaimed, broken. 

Everything's broken: my heart, hope and peace.

Sobbing, I let all my screams and cries out. If this is what had happened to Yeonjun... I still had a lot of heartbreak to endure.

I'm not ready...

And I'm not sure if I ever will be.

If only I didn't try and find Soobin, no one would be dead.

 No one would be stuck here.

No one would be in pain.

At least not everyone...

It's all my fault.

I'm the only one to blame.