Chapter 17 Irriversable

I walked up the stairs and into the room.

I sat down on my bed and thoughts whirled in my mind. "Why Am I here". "What do people expect me to be?". "Why does my dad treat me and mom so badly". "Am Ietting Michael down if I leave?". "I already promised him to stay strong". "but for how long?". "Why am I alive if my mum and dad have never even gotten that close?". "I'm so confused". "I've had enough!". "I need to talk to someone but I simply can't reach out!". "After all I've been through why can't I catch a break!!!". "SOMEONE HELP ME!!!!". "UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!". My mind screamed. I was wearing a black hoodie jumper and Gray pants. My hair was down.

I felt so overwhelmed. Overwhelmed because of my dad's lack of respect for mum and their problems. Overwhelmed because of Kelly's suicidal burden on my shoulders. Overwhelmed because I'm forced to give up too easily worried I'm failing Michael and that he wouldn't understand. Overwhelmed with how I'm even existing. Overwhelmed at the chances I could hurt someone at school because of what I'm going through. Overwhelmed because I can't reach out to say what's wrong with me.

Overwhelmed because of what I've already been through witch is what I've written down in my chapters. Overwhelmed because I can't do ANYTHING!! The people who have read this book would understand how ive felt the past months. for those who have not read my other chapters I suggest you start from the beginning. I buried my face in my hands. As my knees supported my elbows as I just sat there. "I'm sorry Michael...". I said quietly.

I felt helpless. I can't take this enymore.

I sat there wondering what would happen if I cut myself. These past few days I've been fighting the urge to do it. I don't know how long I can hold this urge off for..

so much has happened to my family. Me...

dad has messed me up. he broke my heart. Just like my past has. What has happened In my short life is irriversable... and I can't escape it....