Chapter four

Chapter four

𝑴𝒂𝒓𝒄𝒉 1, 2019:

𝑬𝒏𝒕𝒓𝒚 1

𝑯𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝑫𝒆𝒎𝒐𝒍𝒂 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒚, 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘? 𝑨𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒑𝒐𝒊𝒏𝒕, 𝒊𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒔. 𝑰𝒕 𝒕𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒎𝒐𝒎 𝒇𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒚𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒔 𝒕𝒐 𝒈𝒊𝒗𝒆 𝒃𝒊𝒓𝒕𝒉 𝒕𝒐 𝒂𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒄𝒉𝒊𝒍𝒅 𝒂𝒇𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒎𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒉𝒊𝒎 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝒂 𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒕𝒍𝒆 𝒈𝒐𝒅 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑰... 𝑰 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒄𝒉𝒊𝒍𝒅. 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒘𝒉𝒐 𝒄𝒂𝒎𝒆 𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒊𝒍𝒚 𝒅𝒖𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒇𝒊𝒓𝒔𝒕 𝒚𝒆𝒂𝒓 𝒐𝒇 𝒎𝒚 𝒑𝒂𝒓𝒆𝒏𝒕'𝒔 𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒓𝒊𝒂𝒈𝒆. 𝑺𝒐, 𝒚𝒆𝒂𝒉, 𝑰 𝒉𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒉𝒊𝒎 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒕𝒂𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒂𝒕𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏.

𝑶𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒅𝒂𝒚 𝑫𝒆𝒎𝒐𝒍𝒂 𝒅𝒊𝒆𝒅, 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝑰 𝒇𝒆𝒍𝒕 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒉𝒊𝒎 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒔𝒆𝒏𝒆𝒅. 𝑰 𝒔𝒂𝒕 𝒂𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒃𝒂𝒍𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒚 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒎𝒚 𝒆𝒚𝒆𝒔 𝒃𝒖𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒂𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒊𝒅𝒆 𝒐𝒇 𝒎𝒚 𝒃𝒂𝒃𝒚 𝒃𝒓𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓'𝒔 𝒇𝒂𝒄𝒆. 𝑰'𝒍𝒍 𝒂𝒍𝒘𝒂𝒚𝒔 𝒓𝒆𝒎𝒆𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒅𝒂𝒚 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌𝒆𝒅 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆: 𝒔𝒖𝒏𝒏𝒚 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒃𝒓𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕 𝒂𝒔 𝒇𝒍𝒐𝒄𝒌𝒔 𝒐𝒇 𝒑𝒆𝒐𝒑𝒍𝒆 𝒘𝒂𝒍𝒌𝒆𝒅 𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆.

"𝑽𝒐𝒐𝒐𝒐𝒐𝒎," 𝑫𝒆𝒎𝒐𝒍𝒂 𝒔𝒂𝒊𝒅, 𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒚𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒐𝒚 𝒄𝒂𝒓 𝒎𝒐𝒎 𝒈𝒐𝒕 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒉𝒊𝒎 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚 𝒘𝒆𝒆𝒌. 𝑰𝒕 𝒎𝒂𝒅𝒆 𝒎𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒓𝒚 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒘𝒉𝒐𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒑𝒊𝒄𝒌𝒔 𝒎𝒚 𝒋𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒏𝒂𝒍 𝒕𝒐 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅, 𝒚𝒐𝒖'𝒅 𝒄𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒎𝒆 𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒉𝒐𝒓𝒓𝒊𝒃𝒍𝒆 𝒂𝒅𝒋𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒗𝒆𝒔 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒄𝒂𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒌 𝒐𝒇.

𝑾𝒊𝒕𝒄𝒉, 𝒐𝒈𝒃𝒂𝒏𝒋𝒆, 𝒘𝒊𝒄𝒌𝒆𝒅... 𝑲𝒆𝒆𝒑 𝒊𝒕 𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒈... 𝑰 𝒅𝒆𝒔𝒆𝒓𝒗𝒆 𝒊𝒕.

𝑰 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒆 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒎𝒂𝒔𝒉 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒕𝒐𝒚 𝒐𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒈𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒅.

𝑰 𝒔𝒂𝒊𝒅 𝒔𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒏𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒚 𝒂𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒕𝒐𝒚... 𝒔𝒂𝒊𝒅 𝒊𝒕 𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒍𝒐𝒖𝒅, 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒉𝒆 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒈𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒅 𝒎𝒊𝒔𝒄𝒉𝒊𝒆𝒗𝒐𝒖𝒔𝒍𝒚 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒖𝒆𝒅 𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒚𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒄𝒂𝒓. 𝑻𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒅𝒍𝒚 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒈𝒐𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒉𝒊𝒎; 𝑫𝒆𝒎𝒐𝒍𝒂 𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝒂𝒏 𝒂𝒅𝒖𝒍𝒕 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒎𝒐𝒔𝒕 𝒕𝒊𝒎𝒆𝒔 𝒊𝒕 𝒃𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒅 𝒎𝒆 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒏 𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒆.

𝑰 𝒅𝒊𝒅𝒏'𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒌 𝒂𝒕 𝒂𝒍𝒍. 𝑰 𝒔𝒏𝒂𝒕𝒄𝒉𝒆𝒅 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒕𝒐𝒚 𝒄𝒂𝒓 𝒊𝒏 𝒂 𝒃𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒓𝒂𝒈𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒓𝒂𝒏 𝒅𝒐𝒘𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒔. 𝑰𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒒𝒖𝒊𝒕𝒆 𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒚 𝒕𝒐 𝒈𝒆𝒕 𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒐𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒓𝒐𝒂𝒅, 𝒎𝒐𝒔𝒕 𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒔𝒆𝒔 𝒘𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒏'𝒕 𝒇𝒆𝒏𝒄𝒆𝒅 𝒊𝒏 𝑲𝒐𝒔𝒐𝒇𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒐𝒏𝒆𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒘𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒇𝒆𝒏𝒄𝒆𝒅 𝒉𝒂𝒅 𝒂 𝒇𝒖𝒏𝒏𝒚, 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒍𝒆𝒔𝒔-𝒔𝒆𝒄𝒖𝒓𝒆 𝒂𝒓𝒄𝒉𝒊𝒕𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒂𝒍 𝒅𝒆𝒔𝒊𝒈𝒏𝒔.

𝑨𝒔 𝒉𝒆 𝒂𝒍𝒎𝒐𝒔𝒕 𝒄𝒂𝒖𝒈𝒉𝒕 𝒖𝒑 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒎𝒆, 𝑰 𝒔𝒊𝒅𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒑𝒑𝒆𝒅 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒎𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒓𝒊𝒑𝒑𝒆𝒅. 𝑫𝒆𝒎𝒐𝒍𝒂 𝒈𝒐𝒕 𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌 𝒖𝒑 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑰 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒚 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒎𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒉𝒆 𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒅. 𝑰 𝒈𝒖𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒅 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝑰𝒚𝒂 𝑭𝒆𝒓𝒂𝒏𝒎𝒊'𝒔 𝒔𝒂𝒍𝒐𝒏 𝒂𝒄𝒓𝒐𝒔𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒕𝒓𝒆𝒆𝒕 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒏, 𝒂 𝒄𝒂𝒓 𝒉𝒐𝒏𝒌𝒆𝒅 𝒍𝒐𝒖𝒅𝒍𝒚, 𝒕𝒊𝒓𝒆𝒔 𝒔𝒄𝒓𝒆𝒆𝒄𝒉𝒆𝒅 𝒘𝒉𝒊𝒄𝒉 𝒎𝒂𝒅𝒆 𝒎𝒆 𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏. 𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝑫𝒆𝒎𝒐𝒍𝒂,𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒆𝒅 𝒃𝒆𝒏𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒉 𝒂 𝒄𝒂𝒓. 𝑺𝒄𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒎𝒔 𝒆𝒓𝒖𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒂𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒅 𝒎𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒐𝒏𝒍𝒚 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝑰 𝒓𝒆𝒎𝒆𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒅 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒎𝒐𝒎, 𝒓𝒖𝒏𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒔𝒆.

𝑺𝒉𝒆 𝒌𝒆𝒑𝒕 𝒔𝒄𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒂𝒔 𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒚𝒂𝒏𝒌𝒆𝒅 𝑫𝒆𝒎𝒐𝒍𝒂 𝒖𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒓𝒏𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒉 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒆𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒊𝒓𝒆𝒔, 𝒔𝒄𝒓𝒂𝒑𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒔𝒐𝒎𝒆 𝒇𝒍𝒆𝒔𝒉 𝒐𝒇𝒇 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒂𝒓𝒎.

𝑰 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅'𝒗𝒆 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒓𝒆𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏𝒆𝒅 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒕𝒐𝒚 𝒄𝒂𝒓.

𝑰 𝒓𝒂𝒏 𝒂𝒇𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒎𝒐𝒎, 𝒃𝒍𝒐𝒄𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒍𝒅 𝒂𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒅 𝒎𝒆 𝒖𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒍 𝒘𝒆 𝒘𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒂𝒕 𝑹𝒆𝒅𝒆𝒆𝒎𝒆𝒓'𝒔 𝒉𝒐𝒔𝒑𝒊𝒕𝒂𝒍, 𝒔𝒊𝒕𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒊𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒂𝒊𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒓𝒐𝒐𝒎 𝒂𝒔 𝒎𝒚 𝒎𝒐𝒎 𝒑𝒂𝒄𝒆𝒅 𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒕𝒉. 𝑴𝒐𝒎 𝒅𝒊𝒅𝒏'𝒕 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒂𝒕 𝒎𝒆. 𝑰 𝒕𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒉𝒐𝒘 𝒔𝒐𝒓𝒓𝒚 𝑰 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒊𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒏𝒐 𝒑𝒐𝒊𝒏𝒕. 𝑰𝒚𝒂 𝑭𝒆𝒓𝒂𝒏𝒎𝒊 𝒎𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒕𝒐𝒍𝒅 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒊𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒎𝒚 𝒇𝒂𝒖𝒍𝒕.

𝑰 𝒓𝒆𝒎𝒆𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒕𝒓𝒚𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒄𝒓𝒚. 𝑪𝒓𝒚𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒅𝒊𝒅𝒏'𝒕 𝒔𝒐𝒍𝒗𝒆 𝒂 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈. 𝑯𝒂𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆 𝒔𝒕𝒓𝒐𝒏𝒈 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒉𝒐𝒑𝒆 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒃𝒆𝒔𝒕, 𝒓𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕?

𝑩𝒆𝒔𝒊𝒅𝒆𝒔 𝒊𝒇 𝑰 𝒎𝒂𝒅𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒚 𝒔𝒊𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒔𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒅, 𝒎𝒚 𝒎𝒐𝒎 𝒘𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒂𝒕 𝒎𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒂𝒕𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝑰 𝒏𝒆𝒆𝒅𝒆𝒅, 𝒂𝒕 𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒕 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒊𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒚.  𝑰𝒕 𝒘𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒖𝒔, 𝒆𝒔𝒑𝒆𝒄𝒊𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒘𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒊𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒎𝒚 𝒇𝒂𝒖𝒍𝒕. 𝑺𝒐, 𝑰 𝒅𝒓𝒐𝒘𝒏𝒆𝒅 𝒎𝒚𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒇 𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒐 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒈𝒐𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒐𝒏 𝒂𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒅. 𝑻𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒄𝒆 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒂 𝒘𝒉𝒊𝒓𝒍𝒘𝒊𝒏𝒅 𝒐𝒇 𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒗𝒊𝒕𝒊𝒆𝒔 𝒇𝒓𝒐𝒎 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒑𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒔 𝒊𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒂𝒊𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒓𝒐𝒐𝒎 𝒕𝒐 𝒎𝒚 𝒎𝒐𝒎'𝒔 𝒅𝒊𝒔𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒚

𝑾𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒊𝒇 𝑫𝒆𝒎𝒐𝒍𝒂 𝒅𝒐𝒆𝒔𝒏'𝒕 𝒎𝒂𝒌𝒆 𝒊𝒕? 𝑰 𝒓𝒆𝒎𝒆𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒄𝒉𝒊𝒍𝒍𝒆𝒅, 𝒔𝒎𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒗𝒐𝒊𝒄𝒆 𝒘𝒉𝒊𝒔𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒎𝒚 𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒔 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝑰 𝒑𝒓𝒂𝒚𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝑮𝒐𝒅.

𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒅𝒐𝒄𝒕𝒐𝒓 𝒄𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒆𝒅 𝒎𝒐𝒎.

𝑾𝒉𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒉𝒂𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒂𝒚 𝒑𝒊𝒒𝒖𝒆𝒅 𝒎𝒚 𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒕. 𝑰𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝑰 𝒓𝒆𝒎𝒆𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒗𝒊𝒗𝒊𝒅𝒍𝒚, 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒊𝒏 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒆𝒚𝒆𝒔. 𝑾𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒎𝒐𝒖𝒕𝒉 𝒎𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒅, 𝑰 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒅 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒃𝒆𝒄𝒂𝒖𝒔𝒆 𝑴𝒐𝒎'𝒔 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒕𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒎𝒆 𝒐𝒇𝒇. 𝑺𝒉𝒆 𝒄𝒓𝒖𝒎𝒃𝒍𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒈𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒅, 𝒑𝒖𝒍𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒐𝒇𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒄𝒂𝒓𝒇 𝒐𝒏 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒅. 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝒅𝒐𝒄𝒕𝒐𝒓 𝒕𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒅 𝒈𝒆𝒕𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒖𝒑 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒎𝒐𝒎 𝒔𝒂𝒕 𝒈𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒅 𝒐𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒇𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒓.

𝑬𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒄𝒍𝒊𝒄𝒌𝒆𝒅 𝒊𝒏 𝒎𝒚 𝒃𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒏. 𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒎𝒚 𝒎𝒐𝒎'𝒔 𝒈𝒂𝒛𝒆 𝒎𝒆𝒕 𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒆. 𝑺𝒉𝒆 𝒑𝒐𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒂 𝒇𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒆𝒓 𝒂𝒕 𝒎𝒆, 𝒘𝒂𝒊𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒂𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒅𝒔 𝒓𝒖𝒔𝒉𝒆𝒅 𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒎𝒐𝒖𝒕𝒉.

"𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒌𝒊𝒍𝒍𝒆𝒅 𝒉𝒊𝒎. 𝑰𝒕'𝒔 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒇𝒂𝒖𝒍𝒕. 𝒀𝒐𝒖'𝒗𝒆 𝒓𝒖𝒊𝒏𝒆𝒅 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈."

8:50 am

One of the few things —if not the only thing—I have learned all my life is hiding my weakness. I know many people think crying isn't a sign of weakness. People think letting anger overshadow you is a sign of weakness. 𝑳𝒊𝒆. 𝑩𝒊𝒈 𝒇𝒂𝒕 𝒍𝒊𝒆. Crying and showing fear are the biggest elements of a weakling, and I'd rather flip off at people than break down and cry.

And right now, I feel weak and stupid next to him.  I can't even meet his eyes. 𝑮𝒐, 𝑨𝒚𝒐.

More tears flow down my cheeks and I keep wiping at it with the back of my hands. I'm unable to get my mother's voice out of my head. That hateful voice that reminds me that I'm nothing but destruction.

I shut my eyes and the words she says constantly knocks my head over and over.

"You ruined everything."

No one can get over such a thing easily. Mom and I used to be buddies; we did almost everything together. Fine, maybe things changed after she had Demola, still things were far better before his death.

I can see Ayo staring at me from my side view, and so, I dry my cheeks. If I were in his shoes, many questions would probably run through my mind. 𝑰𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒊𝒕, 𝑨𝒚𝒐? 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝒒𝒖𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔.... 𝒅𝒐 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒂𝒏𝒔𝒘𝒆𝒓𝒔?

Jerking forward, my legs get weaker by each step and it feels like soon, my legs will give up carrying me. My stomach keeps churning. 𝑰 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅 𝒔𝒊𝒕. I dig into my backpack, getting some of the paint from my locker all over my fingers, I grab the bottle of water in there, gulp it and rinse some paint off my fingers.

Once satisfied, I throw the empty bottle into my backpack.

"Are you okay. Gosh, that's a stupid thing to ask," he pauses then continues. "If it's about the stuff in your locker... don't let it bring you down. People are annoying... but stand up for yourself sometimes." As he rambles on, his words sink in my brain.

Here's the truth about pushovers: they are scared, little chickens who do things to please everyone. They're scared of every little thing and everyone and consequences. Consequences...

As of yesterday, I was 100% a pushover. But, I didn't let mom force me into calling him last night, walked away from Seun last night, walked out of class without any care in the world, and now, I'm making my own decision. Ayo is right.

I have to stand up for myself. I have to keep setting people straight until my last breath. Whipping my phone from my back pocket, I send her this: 'I'm not calling him. He's dead to me' then stuff it into my back pocket again.

𝑺𝒕𝒊𝒍𝒍 70% 𝒂 𝒑𝒖𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓.

Several seconds passed and no reply tone dings in my pocket, Ayo says nothing and I still feel these drowning thoughts. It's too quiet. Truthfully, I wonder why he isn't saying anything anymore, so I look at him and he's staring at the road ahead.

The silence between us is deafening. Few cars pass by, honking as they take over one another, puffing fumes in the air.

"You don't know me," I slip him a curious glance which he returns with a half shrug. "You think I'm weak but I'm not..." my voice trails off.

He observes me. "Why do you let people... treat you the way they do? Seun--"

When his eyes meet my death glare, he shakes his head then stops talking. My business is not his business. I know this. He knows this but then, I want to tell him I'm afraid... always afraid.

"I don't let--" I break again. The gravel beneath my feet digs in through my sandals. I bite my lower lips, clench my fists then continue. "Why am I even explaining this to you?  Think what you want."

"I'll drop it, " he says and starts bouncing sideways on his heels. 𝑻𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒈𝒖𝒚 𝒊𝒔 𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒚𝒇𝒖𝒍. "Walking out on Ms. Jodi was a badass move but you could get a suspension."

I raise a brow at him which makes Ayo throw up his hands. "I'm just saying you're in deep shit when you come back to school."

"You're in more trouble than I am."

Ayo sniggers. "She excused me. There's a difference, I didn't walk out. Not that I'm saying you were wrong. I mean it's wrong for walking out on her, but it was..." he trails off when he meets my gaze.

"So you weren't kicked out of class?"

He has this I-have-fucked-things-up look as he scratches his forehead and stops bouncing. "I had to get out of class. You were angry, never seen you that angry."

"Still, you made it seem like you were sent out of class-" I sigh. "Never mind."

As we cross the T-junction that leads to Cups and Saucers, the sound of a moving engine gets closer and tires crunch on the gravel near me. Ayo turns and out of the corner of my eyes, I see the red wrangler which turns my blood cold. 𝑺𝒆𝒖𝒏. 𝑵𝒐. 𝑵𝒐. Why did he ditch class today of all days?

I keep walking but Ayo stops just a few meters away. My neck is rigid. The hair on my back is stiff. The sound of a car door opening and closing gets my attention and for a moment, I look back to see Seun. Something thickens in my throat.

He has a stupid smirk on his plastic face. Sometimes, I wonder if Mrs. Carter took Seun to one of her trips to the cosmetic surgeon. Unlike Ayo's carefree, casual look, Seun comes off as threatening, stockier with a wider face. They are twins but the kind that don't look alike.

"Hey! Lola," Seun waves as his friend, Garry steps out. "What are you doing out here... with my brother?" his eyes travel from me and rest on Ayo who gives his brother a pointed glare.

"Leave her alone," Ayo says then walks towards me and for some reason, I lean closer to him.

"Brother, this is not your fight. Lola, come here," Seun catches up with us. "Did you get my message, Lola?"

𝑷𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒆, 𝒈𝒐 𝒈𝒐 𝒈𝒐, I pray and brush my fingers over my hair. My gaze shifts to Garry who gives me a steady, cold stare. 𝑹𝒖𝒏, 𝒓𝒖𝒏, 𝒓𝒖𝒏.

But I freeze to the spot next to Ayo. The fear speeds up in my chest. I want it to stop but it won't. I peer at Seun when he doesn't respond to Ayo's warning. The pulse on my forehead hammers. 𝑷𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒆, 𝒅𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒍𝒆𝒕 𝒉𝒊𝒎 𝒕𝒂𝒌𝒆 𝒎𝒆 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒉𝒊𝒎. 𝑰 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅 𝒓𝒖𝒏. 𝑹𝒖𝒏.

Seun attempts to grab my hand but Ayo holds him back which makes Garry, the big guy--and when I say big I mean tall as Ayo, broad as Seun--steps forward, ready to defend his friend.

"Seun," Ayo warns again, his voice is cold.

I can't even look at both brothers. They've always been at each other's neck since I can remember and after Seun and I fell out, their fighting intensified. Ayo got in his face whenever he found Seun torturing me. If only he knew his defense meant nothing when Seun wanted something.

Garry approaches us, almost in Ayo's face too. The only thing he needs is a go and he'll pounce. 𝑾𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒂 𝒑𝒖𝒑𝒑𝒆𝒕.

"It's not that serious," the scowl on Seun's face disappears. He chuckles and I study him with a gaping mouth. "Garry, chill out. We're all cool right, Ayo? Lola, we're cool right?"

I should say something; tell him to stay away from me. Scream at his face or hurt him in the craziest way possible. Bash his car if I have a bat. Scratch his car or spit on him. But I'm frozen.

𝑺𝒕𝒊𝒍𝒍 70% 𝒂 𝒑𝒖𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓.

My eyes are the only thing working now and it moves to Garry who still has his eyes on me. I quickly look away.  

"Yes," it comes out as a whisper.

"What?" Seun snatches his hand from Ayo. "Lola, I need to hear it."

"Yes... w-we are cool," and like the scared little thing that I am, I look down at my feet.

Ayo must be disappointed in me right now. He's right. I let people walk over me too much. 

Seun turns away, his feet making a noisy crunch. The doors of his car opens and slams shut, telling me he won't bother me again. I expect to hear his vehicle roar to life but nothing. The world around me is still.

"Lola, happy birthday." he shouts and I look up. "I have something of yours with me. You'll like it." he laughs. "Everyone will like it."

And with that, Seun pulls out of the curb.

The next several seconds, I stand there, hoping Ayo will just walk away. It's annoying how much this guy is so accurate with his words.

"Where are you going now?" Seun asks.

"I don't know," I close my eyes, my breath shaky. 𝑺𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒐𝒇 𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒆. It has to be...the pictures.