The Other Side of it All

[ HAYLEY ]

Heavy sighs, my heart beating faster. This is the very first time I can see him on his birthday!

They are now facing each other and it seemed like my son is about to propose to her. I've been stalking him ever since I got myself here. My son, growing up before my eyes. It's heartbreaking.

I have nothing to do with everyone else, but the only thing that I wanted is to touch my son. To cling to him and be a mother for the years I have never been with him. I cannot wait to hug him tight and tell him everything. The truth.

This is such a nightmare seeing him on a distance. There were a lot of people today, and this seems like a great day to do his proposal. I am so happy to witness it, in front of my naked eyes, yet, I have to remain unknown. Stefano took me out of my son's life by brainwashing him and making me the bad guy by twisting all the story.

I never left. I never wanted to abort him. STEFANO MADE ME DO IT.

He wanted to kill our son.

It keeps haunting me for years now. But, this is the other side of it all - The Truth.

I had my son, John, when I was in high school. I never wanted to be pregnant but, Stefano - he raped me. He kept on saying that me, being blonde and all that, turns him on. I did not tell that story to anyone my entire life because Stefano - I know what he's up to. I know what he's capable of.

He's selling drugs at a very young age and it had me struggling with some men he's working with. I was gang raped by them one night. My dignity, and everything about me including my innocence. He stole it. Stefano hosted the orgy and I was their prey. I can still remember how five of them tied me on walls and handcuffed me on the sides of the bed. I cannot fought back. There was a man, one of his drug men, holding a gun towards my head that whenever I scream, he's acting to pull the trigger. I was crying in silence, feeling and absorbing everything.

That moment, I was vulnerable; barely moving, even drugged by them a bit. It went very slow, almost like torture. Things are still my nightmare even today.

Stefano made everyone believe he raised John Bryan on his own; that I vanished without saying a word; that I was the one who ruined him. He made that story well fabricated enough for his friends and family to believe.

That's not true - I am one of his victims. I don't know what to do up until this moment.

I can't tell the police nor anybody. He knows I am dead by now when he attempted to burn me alive.

IT WAS TORMENT that I lived for years. I could still see myself in a haystack, hands tied on a log. I'm always followed by that imagery. I am so afraid to tell John Bryan everything - that I never left him.

Stefano lied about us. He made himself look like a hero on the eyes of his people. I cannot do anything, I am afraid as hell, like he's holding me on my neck. He even gave me threats like, if I would get closer to John, he'll kill my parents. I cried about that because I have no one on my back. He brainwashed them all, and now I am left with no one. I became a fugitive hiding miles away with the truth.

John is the product of Stefano's monstrosity. After he raped me, he insisted for me to get rid of it even it was just months before I will bear John. He made me take medicines that I don't know the names of. They were abortion pills later when I found out. Glad they never worked and John made it here. He's alive and healthy. I couldn't ask for more.

Revenge and anger - that's all I am feeling right now. I have to save my son from this life that had been blinding him. But right now, I cannot do more than lurking. I need to witness him growing first and take him away after. I am feeling devastated about everything. As a mother, this is what completes me -- here, sitting far away from him, wearing a shoal to cover my burnt face, acting like a ghost from the dead.

My son, he had grown too fast. Everything was just fast as moments that I am running away from it. I am so afraid to see him nearer. I don't want Stefano to know I am here somewhere near our son. I don't want him to know I am still alive.

In a sudden juncture, John took a step out of their dining table, and knelt down to ask her girlfriend. I am witnessing it - my heart raced.

"Becca, will you m-"

He was just about to reach hands on his coat pockets when the girl he named Becca stopped his hands from doing so. I can see everything from here.

"No, please. Don't.." she said.

There was an awkward silence between them. What is happening? As a woman, I could definitely tell that there's something bothering that woman. It shows.

She sighs deeper as she added, "I'm breaking up with you, Bryan."

It pained me. Seeing my son being rejected with shame surrounding him, like everyone was a camera covering all the messy things going on at their table.

"No.. Becca, what are you talking about? You got to be kidding me.."

"Bryan, I-- I'm breaking us off."

Everything went downgrade in an instant - The shame that I can feel for my son; every single person here inside The Parfait is looking at them.. I'm also feeling anxious and worried. I should have been there to comfort him, but I just can't.

"What? Wha - why? Did I do something wrong?"

His girlfriend looked at him, then get her head down back.

"No, no. You did not. It's just I don't.. love you anymore."

Everybody's eyes were fixed on their table. Why is she feeling like this towards Bryan? Did she know about the darker side of his dad? Or if she does, I'm feeling guilty. I don't know but I wanted to do something from here. I'm sorry, son.

"But - but you said we were a team right? Becca, we had amazing eight months together. You - you said it's us against the world why are you turning me down like this? GOD. This is rubbish."

"I--I'm sorry, Bryan. I'm really sorry."

"No, Becca. We can talk about everything and we will b--"

She grabbed her Birkin bag and started to run away.

Everybody heard and saw it. She meant every word she said. My son is now left with no one. God, I feel horrible watching him.

He stayed kneeling on the ground for quite a few moments and it shows that he's full of agony. He's turning red, and his hands are held tight. I really want to stand here and comfort him. But, I can't. I'm afraid of the eyes watching from afar.

I sighed heavily. I need to make my son feel okay, somehow. I need him to feel me, a mother, in this times of brokenness.

I stood up from my table without ordering anything and approached a waiter to ask him to give my son this - a face towel with John Bryan's name engraved on it. I did it, for today is his birthday. I cannot let this day pass without him receiving any gift from me. I will be very happy to witness him use this towel, just like whenever he goes, I'm with him. Closer.

The waiter said yes as I told him not to let John Bryan know it's from me. The waiter asked why, and I answered him, saying that the girl who just went out, his girlfriend, made it for John and doesn't want to be recognized since they just broke up.

The waiter nodded and just went straight to his table.

"Excuse me sir, someone wants to give this to you."

He finally stood up from kneeling and took the towel. He touched it and felt every fiber that I just touched and embroidered. It made me tear up, I felt like I was nearer. Like.. I finally held his hands after years of trying to keep things to myself.

"Who gave me this?" He asked back.

"Uh. she.. doesn't want to be named."

John Bryan folded the towel out of his hands and gave it back to the waiter.

"Well, I don't - I don't need this. You can use this to wipe your tables if you want to."

He started getting his things and walked out.

My heart crushed after what I heard and saw. Nothing could be painful than being turned down but I feel sorry, on the other side of what happened. Stefano brainwashed him good by buying him stuff that are expensive and rare to find. I cannot do that. I am powerless. I wish John could see me one day, more worthy to be with than the lies that grew from his head.