rona_mae_bautista

How are you? Are you really good? Or do you just say that since that is what you also want to believe?

I too have this struggle within me, an everyday battle that i keep having. Someday i win (or so i thought), and someday i loose.

I have a lot of question and a lot of fear. And I choose to always stay above it, but there will always come a point were you cannot hold anymore and you just cry and wished that everything just stops.

You see, you are not alone. I too, experiences this. 

So be with me and I will lead you to a journey full of struggle and hope.

And When The World Stops

But you know what is important, is for you to keep moving. Stop if you must but learn to walk again, slowly at first until you are now ready to run.


One thing I've learned this pandemic is that even if the world stops, your dreams doesn't stop. And so what will you do? You need to keep breathing.


I am a single parent with so many bills to pay. I've lost a job and somehow, I've lost myself in that process or so I thought.


In this big city, my world only revolves on working and working and working. If the time comes that I wanted to quit my job like before, it is because there is a good job offer waiting for me already. But this time of pandemic, I do not have any back-up plan. Everything is sudden and took me by surprised like everyone else.


I always thought that I am different, being not sociable and emotionally not capable to connect to people. But this time, it proves me wrong.


No matter how different you think you are, there will always be a thin line of your similarity to others. The situation may differ, but the feeling and emotion connects you to one another.


I am not saying I've surpassed this trial, but in a way, I at least started to move on and hoping to be better.


I stop thinking of how pitiful my situation is, instead, I started looking at my why again --- my son.


You see, when you think you can no longer go on, think outside yourself. Think of the people that depends on you. Think of those who are cheering for you, either silently or speaking it out.


And lastly, think that one day, a better horizon awaits us. We may not see it now, especially in difficult situation, but it's there.


Emotional and mental health can be really mean, but I believe that God is greater more than anything that is happening in your life.


But something out there is greater, that I decide to keep on going.


Something Outside