Time Loop

The next three months were the happiest in my life . Everyday with Joon felt like a blessing . I enjoyed him being my boyfriend rather than just being my friend. Now that his heart only belonged to me . There was so many possible ways in which he could've possibly upset me , but he never did . I enjoyed every moment with him.Not that I didn't feel insecure again. But this time I had him , a shoulder to lean on , a heart to accept me and a pair of arms to run into that made me feel the safest in the world.

Finally it was there, my b'day . I was so happy the entire day.Olivia let me have friends over at my house that night . I didn't invite many- just Luna , Julienne and Joon. I dressed myself up in my new White crop top and paired it with a lavender skirt. I tied my hair in a little ponytail and applied some mascara and lip gloss.

I rushed downstairs as soon as I heard the calling bell ring.

"Happy Birthday princess " Julienne and Luna shouted in sync and wrapped me up in a bear hug as soon as I opened the door .

" You guys came together ?" I asked between their hugs .

" Actually your hot boyfriend gave us a ride " Julienne said.

" Joon is already here ? " I asked excited .

" She just wants her boyfriend . We are just potatoes " Luna said mockingly .

I slapped her teasingly , giggling .

"He is a bit annoyed by the way " Julienne continued .

" These girls just wouldn't close their mouths " just then I heard Namjoon's voice coming from the door . Although he was saying this , he was still smiling . My jaw dropped as I looked at him . He was wearing a white T shirt paired with dark blue denim shorts and jacket .He wore blue shaded stylish glasses , socks and shoes . It must have been such a tough look to pull off for any ordinary person , but not for him. Everything about him made me feel like he was a famous supermodel.

" Told ya he was hot " Julienne said nudging me.

" You look gorgeous " he said coming closer me ." Happy birthday babe " he said pecking my forehead .

" Guys , remember elders are here , we don't want you to take it any further than that in front of us " Luna said making us chuckle .

" Kids , come over here " Olivia called out from dining hall .

There on the table, sat a delicious looking cake with candles lit .

" Make a wish , make a wish " Luna said jumping like a kid .

I closed my eyes but I didn't know what to wish for . At the moment I was euphoric the way I was . I didn't wanted anything more .

I blew the candles and cut the cake . There was some moment of messing with cake cream ending up in whipping cream face masks including aunt Olivia .

"Time for PRESENTS..... " Luna shouted .

" Open mine first " Julienne said shoving a wrapped box into my hands . I carefully unwrapped it . It was an album of Taylor Swift . " I don't know whom you like so I thought I will go for her , since she is popular " she said .

"Thank you so much Julienne " I said with gratitude .

" Haha don't mention it " she said .

" Here " Luna pushed a much smaller box into my arms " I don't know if you will like it " she said unsure . I unwrapped it to see it was a frame containing a photo of us four , originally supposed to be a couple selfie of me and Joonie which Julienne and Luna spoiled by jumping out of nowhere showing victory signs " did you like it ?" she asked fiddling with her fingers. " Oh ! I love it " I said hugging her .

Aunt Olivia gave me a new pair of black heels . When I looked at Namjoon, he gave me a apologetic shrug .

************

" Are you upset that I didn't get you a gift ?" he asked me later when we were sitting on the limited space of the couch huddled next to each other. Usually I hated congested spaces but I loved this time as it was him and I wanted to be close to him , as much as possible. Julienne was sitting on the floor in front of us munching fries , watching a movie on her phone and Luna was next me dozing . Olivia was somewhere in the house in a space of her own .

" No I am not " I said playing with his hair. It was true I wasn't .All I wanted was him.He was the best gift I ever had . The finest I could ask for .

"Sorry " he mumbled .

" Don't be" I said looking at him " I mean it. All I want is you to be with me . You're giving me that in the best way possible . That's all I need . I need nothing more " I said . A small smile of satisfaction came on his lips and he leaned in to kiss mine. It was a rough hot wet kiss which made both of us moan into each others mouths a bit louder than usual. He pulled away trying to catch his breath as it started to get too steamy . I quickly glanced at Julienne who was too into the movie oblivious to what was happening around her.

" Okay then " he said as he fished his pocket for something " You've earned this " he handed me an envelope .

" Open it " he said as I was inspecting it . The address on it made my heart flutter . It was from Julliard college . I carefully tore open it . My eyes widened as I read it . I read it again in disbelief . " I'm selected " I said in a whisper which turn into a squeak no later " I am SELECTED !! " my voice went high pitched making Julienne turn around and Luna wake up with a start . Olivia rushed to there from somewhere asking " What happened ?"

"Can y'all believe it ? I just got in . There were over 3000 and they selected only 20 and I'm one of them " I said jumping with pride and joy .

" Congratulations " " Calm down babe " "That's aweome " I could her their appreciations . My heart was overwhelmed with happiness.

" NO " suddenly I heard Olivia's rasp voice .

"Aunt ?" I asked confusedly .

" Can't you hear what I just said ? You are not going there" she said casually " I already made plans for your future . I already applied to your future college "

My body started to experience a sudden numbness.

" Why can't I just go there . That's where I like to study " I said trying to calm down.

" I don't care about your likes and dislikes . I'm not your mom " she said coldly

I lost it there . In some way my anger glands were connected to my tear glands . My eyes started to get watery.

" What have I ever done to you to treat me like this ? Why are you so rude and cold to me ? I never asks you for anything . All I want is to lead a life I love . You don't have to pay for my college I would earn for it . If my dad and mom was there ........" .

" They are dead now and they are not coming back to look after their little princess" she cut me off by shouting " I'm doing this for your own good . You are already turning 18 and you are the legal heir for your dad's company. That man built that company from ruins and that is now manhandled by morons . You know how much money that belongs to you is misspent ? I wan't you to get into a position from where you can look after it. From where you can take profit from it . Stop mourning and start doing something for your deceased parents . All you do is talking about your stupid dreams . Dreams . Throw your dreams in the dustbin ." she said rudely

Those words hit me like a shovel .I was infuriated and my eyes started to burn and tear up . I pushed her away out of all the anger making her fall into the ground and whine in pain.

"FUCK YOU " I shouted as I picked up Namjoon's car key and ran to the door. I could hear Julienne and Luna helping her up and calling me out . Namjoon moved quickly and held my wrist trying to stop me. I hit his hand hard making him take it away in pain . I ran to the car , got in and kick started the engine. I could hear Joon calling my name but I didn't turn back.

I drove the car in full speed . Tears were flowing from the corner of my eyes . Her words rang in my ears . What am I supposed to do ? Throw my dreams away and live for my parents ? If they were there would they want that ? They would only ask me to do what I love. But she is right they are not anymore . I don't want any money. I don't want any profit . All I want is happiness . And for one time I was . I was happy . I was pleased . I was contented with my life . I was starting to live for myself . I was starting to love my life . Then she ruined it all , once again . Just the way she always does . She keep reminding me what I lost as if someone has placed an order for it . I can't let her do that again. I can't run my parent's company . It's their blood , sweat and tears but .......

A headlight flashing so bright that it penetrated my eyes , brought me back into reality . But then it was too late . I was no longer in control of my car . My hand tried to move the steering in vain . My head went forward . It banged somewhere . I didn't know what happened but I could feel my head splitting . Red hot liquid dripped from my lashes . I could feel my skin getting pierced that send pain up to my spine. I blinked my eyes . I wasn't able to hold it open for anymore .

It was all familiar . I've experienced it all before . This same moment . A moment when you no longer have a thought . Just your head filled with memories that cut through the pain . It was as if I've been caught in a time loop, from which I had no escape .