Chapter 1

He realized he was black. He couldn't change his skin color or try to blend in with another. He felt like a 'weapon' in their eyes. He felt cursed but he was proud of his skin color.

He didn't want to remember when his best friend at 10 years old died, and it gave him nightmares every night. He saw it before his eyes, never forgetting how scared he looked.

The tears streaming down his best friend's face as he was about to experience death after a life of living. Amongst other things, he couldn't bleach his skin. He couldn't simply turn "White".

He didn't understand the term because no matter his personality or what he does, he was painted as a threat. He was the minority, the prey in their eyes as if being black was a sin.

Him and his mother have been down for each other and riding together since day 1. His father didn't bother to show up at his delivery of being born. He was happy he didn't so he wouldn't have to hear his kid screaming bloody murder.

His mom threatened to throw him in the trash at that moment. He cringed silently at the memory when she told him. He could care less about his father since the only fact he knew about him was that he was white.

He hated him as much already. White people weren't his friends. He gladly took after his mother with her dimples, melanin skin along with a button nose. He hated his eyes because they were his fathers, green orbs.

They were as bright as grass. He couldn't stand looking at them in the mirror so he started putting contacts in every now and again. He skipped off the parent subject, awoken from his daze in the pity classroom.

"Everyone's outside already. It's the end of the day." He felt an arm push his shoulder. He went on high alert staring into blue orbs in front of him. He noticed he was white. He noticed he didn't like him with the dislike in his tone.

He hated his school but his mother made him go to an all white school that only had 20% of black students. She didn't want him having babies and miscarriages at a young age. He scoffed. "Leave me alone, aii? I'll get up in a few minutes."

The person nodded silently, leaving the room. He picked himself up off the chair like he said he would, looking around to see his white teacher in the room. "Didn't have to make a white kid wake me up. You're right in the room, lazy bitch." He muttered the last two words leaving the room.

He didn't bother to recognize or hear the teachers little complaints. Especially a white teacher in his view, he couldn't start today. He walked through the double doors, being attacked head on by his best friend.

"Lucieeee! What took you so long!" she yelled in his ear, leaving him cringing.

"Lucian." He corrected her. He couldn't get rid of her but he decided to keep her around since he got used to her antics. She was mixed but claimed that she was full on black. She had hazel orbs, with brown frizzy hair and a smile that brung happiness to everyone's faces except his. "Brianna.."

"Hear me out, hear me out. There's a party..." He sighed, already knowing where this was going. He wasn't really the party type, since she brung him to mostly white people parties. "No." He said without hesitation.

"Oh come on Lucie. I swear this time it'll be fun and I won't leave you by yourself. I'll be next to you, no matter what. Scouts honor." She grinned, putting up a thumb to enable him that she was being serious. Before she could continue, his next best friend came around.

"Hey guys, what's up?" Trent came around them, hugging Brianna's waist. They were dating. He always third wheeled them, which is why he left most of the time. "What's this I hear about a party?"

Trent was a white guy, dyed blue hair with brown orbs. Surprisingly, he wasn't racist. It took some time to get used too but he was telling the truth. He sometimes stuck up for Lucian when Jonathan bothered him a lot. "There's a party. You know, and of course you're coming but I want Lucie to join."

"I'm not joining. I don't fit in like you do. I'm not white like Trent. No offense. And I don't get along with everyone like you do Bri. I'm black, and their music kinda sucks." He said all in one go hoping they'd forget about taking him.

"You're still going buddy. We need a designated driver of course. Please say you'll come." Trent said, using those puppy dog eyes on him. He looked over at Brianna to see she was doing the same thing. Traitors.. He thought. "Fine! This is the only party we'll go too."

Brianna cheered while Trent sent him a smile. "Your dog eyes give me the creeps. Can we start walking or am I walking 'home alone' again?" He realized he made a little pun, smiling to himself. How corny.. He thought.

"You're gonna have to walk home again. You know your mama don't like Trent like that. She only tolerates him." Bri told him, with a smile on her lips before hugging him. He was awkward to these affection things, but hugged back nonetheless. "And stop being scared of yo mama!"

"Can't help it. Every time she threatens to throw me in the garbage. Our garbage is too small for me to fit in." He whined to her before waving goodbye at them, strutting his way down the side walk.

He didn't really live in a white neighborhood but his mama was supported kind of. Every day their being tormented by some white teens or old people talking about get out of town but his mama worked hard to get here.

He pulled out his keys, as he heard a few slurs being thrown his way by people on their porch with nothing to do. He opened his door and closed it. Every day is a war zone.. He thought before sighing.

"Well aren't you gonna say hi to your mama?" He jumped a few feet in the air not realizing his mother standing in front of him. He waved at her, taking off his shoes. "How was school today?"

"It was okay. Boring as usual. Jonathan tried to mess with me today but you know my white boy best friend Trent saved the day. Why don't you like him mama?" He asked her while trudging over to the couch. She shrugged over at her son.

"He seems a bit sketchy. I like how he sticks up for you and stuff but he seems odd. Though, don't worry about it. Just remember where you come from. Don't let nobody in that school tell you shit. I will walk up in that school and beat some-"

"Mama! Mama! Relax! We know you gone come up in there and start boxing or worse hitting people with your shoe. We only do that on the last day of school." He snickered over at her, before he got hit in the face with a cushion.

"Don't hush me boy. Have some manners. I will 3 pointer you into that new garbage bin we got a few weeks back." She pointed at him with a stern look while he nodded his head quickly.

"So.. Brianna asked me to a party. To a white party. Should I go? Can I go? They want me to be designated driver. So, I won't be drinking ma." He told her, looking over at her to see her facial expression.

"I don't know, as long as she don't leave you for dead again. The girl stayed over there and you brung yourself back. That's a sad way to come from a party. Anyways, sure. Just don't let them white boys or girls tell you different. Remember be proud of your melanin skin."

He nodded at her words, before grabbing his bag telling her he had to do his homework. He walked up the stairs, into his room on the left. His walls were mocha, his sheets being white and black like frankenstein.

He took out the few books that were due for homework and started after a few minutes later. After he finished, he went on his phone. "Let's see the new things people have to say today." He sighed.

He looked through his instagram and facebook seeing mean comments written about him. He didn't care at the moment but they tugged at his heart since they did sting. Other kids with his skin experienced the same thing but probably more ruthless than he did.

"Dinner is ready Lucian! Come down." He heard his mother yell releasing him from his earlier thoughts. He placed his phone on his bed, before walking down the stairs into the dining room. "Hey ma!"

"Why do you still have on the clothes you were outside with? You know these white people be hawks but we gone let it slide because they ain't in my house. Imagine." She told him and he had to stifle a laugh. His mom always talked about white people, and she fed him some truth with what happened in history.

"I'll change after. Anyways, is this for dinner?" He looked down at the plate filled with rice and beans with steak on the side along with potato salad. His mom gave him a look saying, 'Are you stupid or what?' "Chill ma. I love your food."

"You better. Now sit down and eat." He obliged and sat down across from her, eating his food. He felt a bit anxious since he hated eating in front of people in general but his mother seen everything. He can't complain before she starts saying, 'I cleaned up your shit as a child..' all that unnecessary stuff.

"Any cute boys you interested in? I mean. In the 20% of black boys at your school?" He almost spit out his steak in his mouth, before grabbing his beverage drinking it quickly. It was no secret his mama knew he liked boys.

"Not really." He coughed out, softly. "The boys aren't really my type. They're hot but snobby ma. I hate stuck up people. You know that." He pointed out. He always remembered how he came out to her like it was yesterday.

Flashback

Lucian was lip locking a boy he had to do a project with in his room. He just asked him if he wanted to kiss which was weird. He didn't expect that from a boy wanting to study.

His mother barged in without knocking, catching both of them making out on his bed. "Lucian Ricardo King!" She yelled, making him jump back which ended him in falling off the bed. "I think it's time for you to leave young man." She told the other boy who scurried out with his stuff.

Lucian was scared of the wrath his mother would bring. He was afraid of her next words. He damned himself from reading too many wattpad stories where mom's kicked their boys out. "Lucian. What was that?"

"Mama. I can explain." He got out of his quivering lips, before sitting on his bed. His mother put her hands on her hips. "Well.. Ma I'm gay. It doesn't make me different, I'm still your son y'know?" He told her trying to stop himself from letting the tears slip.

"You need to stop reading. Look what it did to you? I kinda knew already sweet plum. You're still my little boy. I just was surprised you didn't come to me with it since you tell me everything." She spoke to him quietly, rubbing his cheek with her thumb. "I accept you."

"Ma.." He whimpered letting the tears overflow down his cheeks. He hugged onto her for dear life, not wanting to let go. "As long as you ain't tryna be out here like a prostitute or male stripper I accept you." He laughed at her next words before releasing his face from her chest.

"Thank you ma. And I'm not gonna be shaking my booty for that cash or selling my cherry for that lil inch. Count on that." He laughed, before wiping his face.

End Of Flashback

"Lucian! Hello! Don't make me box you inside of your head today boy. You can't ignore me." His mother yelled, reaching over to smack his head. He leaned back, dodging her attack.

"Sorry ma, I was just thinking about something. Not much to say. Just glad to be eating here with you." He said continuing to eat his food while his mother gave him a weird look. Who's child is this? Certainly not mine I probably picked up the wrong one. She thought.

"I'm still your child ma. I'm not crazy. Anyways, like I was saying-.." He got cut off by a knock on the door. He stopped his mom from getting up before he walked over to the door being cautious. He grabbed a bat from their umbrella vase.

He opened the door slowly holding up the bat. He saw an old elderly woman. "What can I do for you old woman?" He told her straight up, not putting up a front.

"Do you have some Ice?" She asked kindly, peering inside. He closed his door a little bit, before yelling out to his ma. "Ma! Grab some ice for this elderly lady!" He looked over at the woman who was just smiling.

"What are you up to hag? I know your kind. Not to single you out or whatever. No disrespect but you probably are racist aren't you?" He questioned, waiting for his mother.

"No dearie, just needed some ice. Ran out." She told him while holding her cane steady. He thought it was taking a bit long for his mother to come back before he heard a scream. "I won't hit you because you're old but I'm pushing you, you bitch." He shoved her quickly before closing the door locking it.

He ran back over to the kitchen to see some white man trying to pin his mother down. He grew angry. He started using the bat without hesitation. "Get the hell away from my mother you rapist!" He growled.

The ugly man refrained himself from touching her before looking over at the beater. "Get the fuck out my house. Now." He threatened, holding up the bat for one more hit before the man pranced back to where he came from.

He bent down to his mom's level seeing her cry. "Ma you're okay.. I'm here now. You don't have to be scared anymore Ma." he held onto her, rocking her slowly. He couldn't believe it was the 5th time this happened. She worked too hard just to receive less. Damn those people.. He thought.

"I-I'm okay darling. Don't worry about me. We just won't open the doors anymore unless it's for work or school okay? No matter what I say you don't open that door. Lock every door in the house." She told him, gripping his arm.

"Yes ma. Of course." He helped her up, taking her to her room before going back down checking all the doors and windows making sure they were locked. Don't these people care about children and women..? Why treat us like shit. He thought.

He went up to his room. He locked the door, going on his bed. He looked up at the ceiling not knowing what to really say. He was out of words for the night. He kept hearing his phone buzz but he ignored it.

He turned on his bed, being quiet for the rest of the night before closing his eyes hoping to dream a better dream than every other night for the past few years. He may withdraw from the party, since people were out for him and his mom. "They will pay one day. Bow down to our knees. We black people aren't a tool or something you can control. We're human like the rest." He whispered before falling asleep.