Feel like a Monster

Chapter Fifteen

(Nyxton's POV)

I noticed that the two males had realized what the cub had said was true. This wasn't good. Realizing my fear meant knowing my weakness. I couldn't have other males, or anyone in general, knowing. They could use it against me. It was also one more thing they would want to help me with. And I didn't need ANY help.

"Ok, everyone just calm down. Let's all take a deep breath and think. We aren't going to force you into or near a hospital but you do still need your check up. If not for us at least do it for yourself. Do it to make sure your health is ok. If your cleared then you won't have to go back for another check up for a while or unless something happens. How is that?" River tried reasoning as he showed me his hands, proof he wouldn't attack me.

Without a moment to respond, the cub came barreling towards me. He hooked his tiny arms around my left leg and hugged me tight. I froze. I didn't make a single noise. I didn't even breath.

"I don't want you to die uncle Nyx. Please be healthy!" He cried up at me, almost in tears.

Sucking in a breath, I slowly reached down and picked him up. I beckoned him forward to whisper in his small ear before putting him down and holding his hand with a small smile. The two males were just looking on completely lost and probably surprised I'd picked the cub up in the first place without a complete break down.

Jace must of noticed their reactions because he told me he'd be right back before letting my hand go and running over to his dad. The males got down on one knee to listen to what he had to say.

"What is it bud? What did your uncle tell you?" The cubs father whispered. Of course I could still hear them. It was a laughable attempt really.

"I'm not suppose to tell you dad, it's suppose to be a secret.... Oh ok. I'll tell you but you can't tell uncle Nyx I told you. Uncle Nyx said he'd go but I have to go with him cuz I'm brave. He said I can be brave for the both of us, whatever that means. Oh he also said we have to hold hands. This way he can borrow some of my strength cuz I'm a strong cub. Hey daddy, what's a cub?" Jace wondered as he finished telling them what I'd said. It was cute to watch him share our secret even though we promised not to. I knew he would because that's how children are. It made me happy and sad at the same time. Would my daughter have done the same thing? Or would she of kept the secret locked up forever and thrown away the key?

I turned away from the three humans not interested in what they thought about our secret. For the cub, I'd pretend I didn't hear him tell them what I'd said. I downed the rest of my glass of milk and threw the empty bacon packaging in the trash. I grabbed the small bag of kitten food from the cupboard above the sink I'd found when I first got here and refilled the kittens bowl. After putting the bag away did I turn to face the humans. The cub was nowhere to be seen, probably out playing, but the two older males were still present and standing patiently as I finished my business.

Crossing my arms over my chest I leaned against the counter intent on not speaking to them even if I was spoken to. I'd said my peace so had they. There shouldn't be any reason for them to still be standing in my temporary kitchen. And yet there they stood.

"I know you don't like being around too many people but we'd like to know if you'd come hang out with us for the day? Of course you won't have to speak to us if you don't want to. But my son will be there and he'd be so happy if you came with. It's just for today unless you want to hang out again afterwards. I promise you'll have fun. What do you say Nyxton?" Weston asked in all seriousness. No longer was the playful wild dad I once saw before me.

I thought on it for a good ten minutes before glancing out the kitchen window at the cub. He ran around after a black and orange butterfly, a huge smile plastered on his face. It made me want to keep it there forever. To make sure he never knew sadness or the cruel reality of our world. With my mind made up I turned to Weston and River and nodded my acceptance. Anything for that cub. I'd do for him what I couldn't for my own.

River and Weston smiled to each other before Weston called Jace. We piled into Rivers truck, windows down, and were on our way to our first stop on this 'bonding trip' Weston referred to it as.

(Jace's POV)

Ice cream!!

Uncle Nyx, uncle bear, daddy, and me were going to get yummy ice cream. I was so happy. This was the first time I'd ever had so many uncles. And one of them was a new cool uncle who could turn into a big powerful cat!

He was my favorite uncle now. Not just because he could change into an awesome cat man but also because he was kind of like me. He was scared of doctors, he hated bullies, and he was nice.

We had been driving for a long time now. I looked over to see what uncle Nyx was doing and what I saw made me giggle. He was sitting straight up but his chin was tucked into his chest, arms crossed, and fast asleep. He was also kind of purring a little. I had to inform daddy.

"Daddy, uncle Nyx fell asleep. Should I wake him up? He might miss the ice cream." I tried whispering just in case. Daddy turned around to look right at uncle Nyx while uncle bear- aka uncle River- looked through the tiny mirror in the font car window.

"Well I'll be damned. He really is sleeping. Shit, I thought for sure he wouldn't let his guard down around us for quite a while and yet here he is purring like no tomorrow and sleeping the day away." Daddy spoke excitedly to uncle bear. "Wait until we pull up to the ice cream parlor son." He said turning towards me before looking forward again.

"He probably didn't sleep well. I mean we did find him in the forest. Plus, he's sitting next to Jace. He probably feels like he can relax around children or cubs as he calls them." Uncle bear told daddy before we pulled into a parking spot in front of the ice cream store.

I unbuckled and excitedly opened the car door. Uncle Nyx had woken up right as the car was parked. It made me wonder if he had already been awake. In stead of holding onto daddies hand like normal, I ran around the other side of the car to Uncle Nyx and held onto his hand. He seemed surprised but happy that I did that. I was happy too because I was giving him some of my strength to help him be strong in public, like me. I smiled and led uncle Nyx into the ice cream store.

Now the hardest part of my day... Figuring out which ice cream to get.

(Nyxtons POV)

Walking, or more like being dragged, into the store resulted in a multitude of delectable pungent aromas wafting up through my nose. Strawberry, chocolate, vanilla, mint, some kind of nut, bubble gum, and varying fruits. Every where my eyes looked cones and toppings were on display. A huge menu lay bolted to the wall behind the ice cream display counter. Tables and booths, occupied and not, littered the left over open space.

This place seemed popular if the number of pedestrians coming and going were anything to go by. Anyone who got too close, if they weren't a kid, got a vicious snarl out of me. Most kept a nice invisible gap between me and them. The funny thing was that the kids didn't give a shit what their parents said. They would try to scurry over towards me, big sticky ice cream covered smiles plastered on their faces. Some even offered to share their ice cream.

'Cute cubs.' I thought as they were pulled away by their over protective, freaked out parents.

Honestly it did hurt when they reacted that way. They are just protecting their young ones from something they deemed could be a danger. It was understandable. But then again it made me feel like such a monster. Something that I never let the scientists make me believe no matter how hard they tried. But in this instant, those humans did. My feelings and emotions didn't start coming back to me again until I began taking this fucking medication. Like I said previously, it's fucking with my mind and senses.

I was pulled out of my thoughts by Jace passing me a waffle cone with this colorful looking ice cream in it and covered in black sprinkles. I took it cautiously from his tiny hand into mine.

"What is it?" I suspiciously inquired to the cub. No way was I eating something that looked like a god damned rainbow Crayola crayon. There's no telling what kind of diseases I could contract from it.

"Why is it this color? Is it moldy?" I sniffed it. "Doesn't smell spoiled." I looked to my giggling nephew. 'That was going to take some getting use to.'

"Ahahaha!! No Uncle Nyx, it's the color of the ice cream. It's my favorite! The first time I got it the ice cream lady said it was called r-rasmatas shewbit. It's really really yummy." He beamed.

I scrunched up my face at the name. 'What in the hell? What did he call it?'

"He meant it's called Razzmatazz Sherbet ice cream. Right buddy?" Wes corrected. He probably saw my "what the fuck" face. I nodded my head towards the male before turning back to the weird ice cream with a name that reminded me of an advanced scientific disease.

'Well here goes nothing.' I thought as I brought the cone to my mouth. 'I wonder if I could live without my tongue if this goes sideways?'

Twenty minutes later and I had scarfed down three more of those cones. I had to hand it to the cub, he sure did know how to pick ice cream. That was now my favorite flavor. Something I found common ground on with the cub and Weston as well. Now we were back on the road. We were headed to Weston's house to drop the cub off with his mother while River, Weston, and I drove over to Rivers' HQ where they will try to get some questions answered.

River pulled up into Wes' drive way and parked the car. Jace was fast asleep leaning against my arm. I lifted him up in my arms and stepped out of the truck.

"Come on in Nyx. My wife is dying to meet you." Wes ushered me up the steps of their two story house and through their front door. Weston led me up the steps to Jace's bed room. I put him down on his bed and tucked him in before descending the stairs.

Before I reached the entrance of the kitchen, I caught a very familiar scent. I'd remember this scent anywhere. It got my blood boiling to the point I partially shifted to my tiger form. My claws and fangs grew out as well as my ears, tail, and stripes. A deep guttural growl rumbled deep within my chest.

Everyone at the kitchen table turned around. River and Weston shot up and out of their seats in alarm. By the looks on their faces, they knew my reason for being mad as hell. And that reason was sitting at the table next to, I presume, Weston's wife.