Don't Fall Asleep

WARNING: Self harm, suicide, angst

Roman looked at his boyfriend.

Patton was the same happy dad he'd always been, but.. There was something behind the smile.

A kind of pain.

Roman pushed the thought away. Patton had promised to tell him if something was wrong.

Patton was fine, Roman was sure.

Until that night.

The night Virgil's screams echoed through the house.

The night Logan came running down the stairs in tears.

The night Roman burst into Patton's room and took in the scene.

Patton was kneeling on the floor, a bloodied razor a metre away.

His arms covered in blood so thick you couldn't see the cuts.

He was swaying slightly, like he was dizzy.

He was blinking slowly, drifting slowly in and out of consciousness.

Roman was panicking.

What happened? Why had Patton done this?

Roman spotted an empty pill bottle lying on the ground behind Patton, and somehow grew paler. He knelt down in front of Patton, taking his boyfriend's bloody hands in his own.

"Patton? Oh, Sunshine I'm so sorry, please, stay awake for me! Don't fall asleep- stay awake!"

Patton seemed to focus his eyes on Roman. "R-Ro..."

"Shh, it's okay Sunshine. Just stay awake for me, okay? Please don't fall asleep- we're gonna get help! Don't fall asleep, Sunshine, please!"

Patton's eyes were now closing for seconds at a time.

He managed to hold himself up for a moment longer, before collapsing against Roman, blood staining his shirt, but Roman couldn't care less. "Sunshine? Please, please, please, hold on, we're getting you help-"

Roman's panicked talking was cut off by Patton raising a hand to Roman's cheek, saying the only words he had strength for. "I love you Ro..."

"No, no, don't you dare. You are surviving this, you are going to be okay. I refuse to let you die, I refuse to let you die!" Roman was crying now, the strong facade slipping away.

Patton smiled, his hand dropping to his chest. "It's okay..."

"No, it's not okay, Sunshine, none of this is okay! You have to survive this, I can't keep going without you! Please, Patton, please. I need you, please hold on, and don't you dare fall asleep."

Patton's eyelids were too heavy to open, but he was holding on, if only slightly. Roman was sitting there, terrified, listening to the rattling breaths Patton was drawing, waiting for the moment they would stop.

"I'm sorry Ro.."

The sound of Patton's breathing stopped.

The room went silent for a moment.

Before the air was rent with Roman's scream, a scream full of pain and suffering and longing.

Roman screamed and sobbed and clutched his dead boyfriend's body to himself as he begged him to come back.

And finally, when Roman physically didn't think he could cry anymore, he leaned in and kissed Patton's forehead, one last time.

"I'm sorry Sunshine..."