Good Morning

All I hear is the the same music I have heard for six months. The same songs in a playlist in a specific order. Of course, it's Hamilton. 'Helpless' sung by Phillipa Soo from the Broadway Musical, Hamilton. I hear this song about four times a day, three if this kid is busy, and that's just on a device. I hear this song about twice as much in my head. It's a great song, but damn it is overplayed.

Just then, someone opens the door to the room I'm in. My room. My head spins and I see the red haired male. "Dinner time kiddo." He says with a smile plastered on his face. I'm guessing he was the one who made dinner.

I feel myself nod. "Alright, I'll be down in a second." I say. My eyes look over to the drawing on the desk. Two men that look like the ones I've seen a lot over the past months. Then, there's a teen kid. I'm guessing that's me. I feel myself walk away and down the stairs.

But before I get down the stairs

Everything changes.

I'm in an uncomfortable bed. I open my eyes and there welcomed with a blinding light. I look around and it looks like I'm in a white room. Beside me are two men and one lady. She looks young. Maybe around twenty. They all looked pretty upset, none of them looking my way. I thought that when you wake up from the hospital, your loved ones are supposed to be happy. The one with brown hair was softly sobbing. The red head got up and went to a plug.

Oh no...

Wait, I'm alive why is he doing this?! Are these people blind?!

The man sighed softly and looked at me. I try and scream but nothing will come out.

"I'm sorry Felix.." Then, before everything changed, the plug was pulled.

Once again, same car, same setting, same ending. I've seen it for so long.

I can't stand it.

I see the car on the road come hurdling towards the one I'm in. The same screech, the same screams, everything the same. The car goes upside down, and the last thing I see is red.

My eyes bolt open and I look around. I sigh in relief, thanking the gods that I'm back in reality. Some dreams that I have are pretty delightful. Playing a game of volleyball, Family game night, movie night, screaming lyrics to a song from the top of our lungs. But some can be...mood killing. Like the hospital, funerals, dying pets, and the car crash. The car crash kills every mood.

I take the sheets off myself and get up from bed. I plan on asking mom, but this time with a better story. If I told mom that I was going out of the city, I doubt she would let me leave. I'll say that I'm spending time at a friend's house. I'll text him about it.

I walk out of my room and walk down stairs. I reach the end of the stairs and walk to the kitchen. I open the fridge and grab some strawberries. I open them and walk to the dining table. I sit down and took a strawberry, biting down on it. I take out my phone and go onto my best friend's contact.

'Hey, I'm going to be out of the city, I need an excuse to go out, help me out?'

I wait a bit and then see the three dots moving.

'Yea sure, have fun :p' was his reply. I smile softly and reply.

'Thanks man' and I hit send. I turn off my phone and continue eating the strawberries. I then close the container and walk to the fridge,opening it and placing the strawberries back.

Just then, my mom walks down stairs. "Morning Robin." She said, smiling softly as she came over to me and wrapped her arms around me. "Did you eat anything?"

I nod and smile softly. "Yea, I ate the strawberries that were in the fridge." I reply. I need to ask her, but I should ask maybe in the afternoon. Yea, that'll be better. I need to keep reminding myself that even if she doesn't say yes, I'll sneak out, plus, I got my man on my back so I should be fine.

Mom nods and lets go of me. She grabbed some things from the pantry and the fridge. "I'm gonna make some pancakes, wanna help?" She asks, putting everything on the kitchen counter top. A big thing of my childhood was helping my mom cook. We would make every meal together. That's why now I can cook for myself and for Camil when she's away.

I nod and smile, missing the old days when we cooked together. "Yea, I would enjoy that." I reply, going to where mom was. All we did was cook. It was quiet, but I'm pretty sure that we both enjoyed the silence. I know I did. It was nice. Calming. I missed these days. When we would bake cakes on special occasions, we would always end up with frosting on our faces.

I flip the last pancake and place it on the plate filled with pancakes. My mom comes over to me and ruffles my hair. She smile. "Look at that, a beauty isn't she." Mom laughs.

I chuckle and smile. "Yea, definitely."I nod. We both look at the stack and I can tell that she's smiling.

"We should do this more often, I miss it." She laughs softly. "Maybe we can do it tomorrow?" She says excitedly. My smile drops. Ah crap, this'll be a pain to explain to her that I can't. I'm going to hope that she doesn't guilt trip me.

"I agree, we should do this more often." I force a soft smile. Now I'm debating if I should actually leave. Did I really plan all of this for nothing? No, there's absolutely no way that I'm going to not go. I have to. What's there to lose? Besides my mom's trust, and some other things. Okay, maybe this was a bad idea, but I'm still going to go. I am determined to get answers, one way or another.

I take the plate of stacked pancakes and I take them to the dining table. I place them down in the center of the table. I grabbed three plates, three forks, and three butter knives and placed them down. Mom already had the syrup and butter on the table.

"Hey kiddo, can you go fetch your sister please?" Mom asks as she sits on the couch. She likes to wait for everyone before eating a meal because that's just respect. I nod and walk to and up the stairs. Once I reach the top of the stairs, I head towards Camil's room. I knock on her pink covered door.

"Hey Camil? Breakfast is ready." I say, opening the door slightly. My sister get up and tilts her head like a confused little puppy.

Her bed head is nothing to laugh, her hair is a mess and she looks very drained. Her hair looked like a lions mane. "What is it?" She asks, rubbing her eyes. Her voice was more of a mumble.

I chuckle softly. "Me and mom made pancakes." I said. She immediately gets up, wide awake and smiling. If you couldn't tell, Camil loves pancakes. It's her go to meal for anything since she was five.

Camil's eyes sparkled. "I'm awake and refreshed." She said, already sprinting out of her room. I laugh and shake my head lightly. This kid really is something.

"Brush your hair you lion!" I yell before she can go towards the stairs. Mom always hated it when we didn't have our hair brushed, especially mine. My hair reaches down to my back and it gets tangled very easily. Camil's hair is basically the same length as mine.

I see her nod and stop herself before she went down the stairs as she heads for the bathroom. "Right, that's a thing." I hear her say. I laugh and walk out of her room, walking down stairs.

I reach the bottom floor and I see my mom, just finishing up cleaning the kitchen. "So, where is she?" She asks, throwing the rag near the sink.

"She's in the bathroom, brushing her hair." I say, smiling as I sit down in my seat. Not long after, Camil came down and sat in her seat. My mom did the same. We all then started to eat. I tried to plan out what I was going to say to mom. Hopefully it's convincing, but once again, I'll just sneak out, but now I have something else to worry about, the cops. My mom is really protective over her kids, so if their missing, no doubt that she'll call the cops.

I sigh softly as I eat.

Let's hope that words are enough to convince the final boss.

My mother.

We never know, maybe she’ll actually be ok with it. But it’s a low chance. But I also have to keep reminding myself that I could just simply sneak out. Hopefully it could work. It would be much easier if mom just said yes though. Let’s just hope that will be enough.

But then again.

Hope can only get you so far.