Chapter 11: Mean

"W-What?" My ghad! I'm stuttering.

"Let's run away together," he said again.

"Huh? A-Are you serious? Us? You and me? W-we will e-elope?" I can't help but feel nervous. My heart is beating too fast.

"What?!" he exclaimed, unable to believe what I just said.

Is it that unbelievable? I mean, that's the first thing that came to my mind when I heard his suggestion. In movies, that's what the guy tells the girl whenever they want to elope.

"You said, we're gonna run away," I lower down my gaze. Is my interpretation really that different?

"Chill, girl," he's even laughing. "What I mean is, let's get lost in the city. Run away from all of this," he said, trying to suppress a smile.

Geez. So embarrassing. If only the ground would open right now and swallow me alive, it will be such a pleasure.

"You've got some wild thoughts there, poppet," he smirked. "Didn't know you've got such side..."

I fetch my phone to avoid his gaze. To get home faster because of the embarrassment I am feeling, I texted Mang Jude to fetch me here. I don't think I can stand being with this guy because of what happened.

"I'm sorry, okay?" I don't know what else to say. "It's actually your fault,your tone is..." my gaze is fixed on the ground, hoping that God will hear my silent prayer and the ground would be wide open.

"Don't worry, I don't have any intention to do 'that' with you," he seriously said.

There's some ticklish feeling in my stomach. There's also something breaking in my soul. I'm feeling a hollow place within me.

What the hell? Am I expecting something? Wake up, Inara. What's wrong with you?

"Because, if I want something to happen to us, I will make sure that we are married first."

I looked at him—astound about his words. He's serious. There is no hint of joking in his voice. Even his eyes is screaming seriousness.

My insides rejoice. I think I'm sick. The hollow space I was feeling earlier is now filled with his soothing words. What the hell is wrong with me?

What are you doing to me, Kale?

My face lit up when I saw our car nearing where we stood.

"I-I gotta go, bye. Thank you," I abruptly said.

The movement of my feet unconsciously became fast towards the car. Midway, I stopped. I looked at Kale.

"D-Do you want to hitch a ride?" my voice came out louder because of the distance between us.

He smiled at me, eyes getting smaller , "I'm fine, Inara. I've got to go somewhere, too. Take care," he genuinely said then wave to say goodbye.

I smile at him for the last time then slowly turn around.

I didn't notice how long was our ride back home. With the rapid beat of my heart, I wasn't able to appreciate the view to the way home.

My heart is beating too much that I can't think straight.

"Hey, Nali," my sister got my whole attention when she called me. She's sitting at the veranda. Ate Raine is wearing a yellow dress at white sneakers, her hair is tied into a bun, a messy one.

I smiled from ear to ear then approach her for a hug. I missed her.

"I missed you," I said, not letting her go.

"Missed you too, sis."

I told her that I will change clothes first. Wearing my sleeveless shirt and black shorts, I then wear my slippers and go downstairs.

When I reached the veranda, the sky is already dark, the sun has already set. My sister is eating her cookies while looking ahead.

I go near her and one cookie then bite it. I sit across her seat.

"Where'd you go this time, ate?" I asked.

She's not always at home. Most of the time she go outside the city, some other times, she's outside the country. It's her hobby. She likes to travel. Despite all that, she doesn't forget all her responsibilities to my family's company.

"Paxton City," she sparingly answered. Referring to the nearest city in Calais.

"You?" my sister glanced at me. "Where did you go?" she asked.

My body stopped because of her question. Should I tell her? Probably not a good idea.

"S-Somewhere..." I hesitantly said. "I'm with a friend," I added so she won't ask more questions.

The scene earlier flash into my mind. Again, my heart beats abnormally.

Do I like Kale? Maybe I'm just thinking too much. I mean, I don't really know things about him. Maybe the feeling I got whenever we are together is the one I like not him.

That's the case some times. People claim that they like someone when in fact, the thing they like is the idea of liking someone.

Same goes with love... We thought we love someone but the truth is we only love the feeling of being loved by that someone. We are in love with the idea of falling in love.

It's complicated. Love is...

And I don't like complicated things.

"Ate..." I tried to get her attention back at me. "How do you know if you like someone?"

Her lips parted with my question.

"It's about my friend, you know," my ghad! I sound like one of those female lead in k-dramas asking for love advice. Making an imaginary friend to cover-up my situation.

"Really?" her eyes getting smaller and observant.

"To be honest, I don't know, Nali." she crosses her arms above her chest. "You know, I never really like someone."

"Never mind—" I got cut-off when she spoke again.

"But, with all the love-shit movies and famous novel, I think you will know if you like someone if you are happy every time you are by that person's side."

My mind goes haywire with her statement. Am I happy when I'm with him?

"You can also feel your heart beating too fast like it's about to explode. But, your mind is at peace. Your soul feels secure. When you are with someone you like, you always fell safe," she added

I nodded.

Well, whenever I'm with Kale I always sense danger. My heart is not at peace every second he's near. Scratch the first sentence, I don't sense danger, KALE is the danger himself.

"That's my interpretation, okay? Tell that to your friend," she stressed the last words like she know that I am lying right now.

That night, after talking to ate about her trip in Paxton City, I go to my bed feeling tired. My body is tired with the running mania we had earlier, my mind is tired with the impossible ideas I can't accept, and my heart is exhausted with too much beating today.

After making me felt peace earlier, now, you're taking my whole sanity.

"Damn you, Kale Arche Lucine," I loudly said like the person I am cursing would hear it.

"Aw, that's mean, Inara Araceli."

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