Chapter3: My Pain

'Treat them with love, They will love you back'

"Never a believer is stricken with a discomfort, an illness, an anxiety, a grief or mental worry or even the pricking of a thorn but Allah will expiate his sins on account of his patience." [Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

Noor's POV

Ummmmm... I never noticed the bags of popcorn I was carrying earlier were no more in my hand, I looked down at my feet, popcorn dispersed out from the buckets on the ground.

I finally came back to my senses that it wasn't my fault only, yeah it was my fault but it was his fault too, He was the one standing in the center, he could have backed away when he saw me coming this way, If it weren't me then probably any other dork like me could have bumped into him.

And just like that angry young man walked away, without scorning at me.

'Wait what? What the hell just happened? His looks were so sure that I offended him then why didn't he scorn at me? This is the second time I crossed paths with him and... he gave me an odd, bizarre, weird, strange, mysterious, and blah impression of himself...Again!'

******

"HOME SWEET HOME" I mumbled as I enter my apartment. I quickly changed into something comfy and prayed my Isha Prayer. I crawled onto my bed as I was too tired, Tomorrow is going to be the first day of another new fifth job as a receptionist. "Allah save me this time, I don't wanna lose my fifth job of this year". I reached to my phone and noticed 15 missed calls from mom. "OH ALLAH, Now save me for real, mom will obviously spit some harsh comments first as I hadn't picked up her calls and after that, she will come to the point. It has to be something important otherwise she won't call me this much"

I quickly unlocked my phone and dialed her number. It was ringing... she quickly in less than five seconds picked up the phone.

"Assalam o Alikum Mom, how's everythin'? I asked her.

Without giving any response of Salam my mom whimpered "No..oor Ul A..Ain". She tried to hold her breath but she couldn't. "Momm!! What happened? You are worrying me!!" I hassled and sat up. Now as I had responded her back she started sobbing uncontrollably in distress. She never called me by my real name until something is worrying her or she is angry. I know who could be the reason behind her tears... My Dad!

I could feel my body boiled up as the thought of him ran through my mind.

"No..or, you..r D..ad" I could hear my mom sniffing loud.

"I was DAMN sure it was HIM WHO MADE YOU CRY!" I furiously yelled. I took a deep breath and calmed myself.

"He i..ss not what w..e thou..ght of him to b..e" She was weeping.

"Mom we already saw him being changed too much, we never in our life expected him to be this". I calmly spoke. "He is not that Dad who would do anything for his family, he wants someone who could do anything for him as he says." I let out a huge sigh

"I lost my Dad when I was ten mom he is dead to me as we are dead to him" It felt like someone had stabbed straight into my chest as I let out my words, my words sounded as I DON'T CARE but the reason is I don't want my mom know that his name still affects me thou.

"Noooo! You are n..not trying to und..erst.and" she whispered yelled holding her breath. "YOU DON'T KNOW HIS REALITY".

"Okay let me tell you then, He is Hammad Abbassi, who married a rich men's divorced daughter named Alina Hammad, Lived a luxurious New York life in her father's mansion, had a daughter named Noor ul Ain Hammad, he pretended to be loving and caring but was sick of the taunts he had to heard everywhere he goes of living a life under the roof of his father in law after, the ten years of marriage he became the CEO of the dumbass company which was left behind by his wife's father for HER!. He left nothing for her or his OWN FUCKING BLOOD and moved back to Pakistan as he was born there and become BAS**RD -a wife-beater an..." I started this as sarcasm but didn't heed that I was almost yelling at the end, Blood was boiling inside me. Even Thou all this was the truth of MY SAD LIFE so my mom didn't stop me and let me speak, she wanted me to let out all the anger burning inside me as she knew that no one knew anything about my past.

BUT as I started using extra abusive words for him, All of a sudden she yelled in anger "NOOR UL AIN!" without any break in her words. My body shivered, I always feared her when she blasts her sudden anger upon me.

"THE-PERSON- YOU- ARE –TALKING- ABOUT- IS -MY –DAMN- HUSBAND –AND- YOUR- FATHER... IT- DOESN'T- MATTER- EITHER –THE- WAY- -YOU -ACCEPT -THE -TRUTH- OR -RUN -FROM -THE -REALITY. HE -IS –YOUR- FATHER- AND- WILL- BE- YOUR- FATHER- TILL- HIS -DEATH -AND -AFTER–HIS-DEATH" She stretched every single word in anger.

Okay, I realized that what I had done was so wrong although she is just so right.

"ss..sorry" I realized and apologized to her, tears were starting to pop in my eyes.

She didn't speak anything in return till 15 seconds... she started to open her mouth "Noor i..." but something made her stop.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOIN' ALINA" I heard his voice after so long, I wanted to hear his voice desperately, there still was a soft corner inside my heart for him, A piece Of my heart still loves him. But I could feel he was so much angry. I wonder who made him angry at this time...

"WHO THE HELL WERE YOU TALKING?" he said roughly. Sweats started to drop from my forehead, I rubbed the sweat from already sweaty palms, My body started to tremble as I heard him scolding AGAIN... I was crying so badly as the memories from the past rewind in my head as I covered my mouth with my palms.

'ALINAA! My dad shouted. I was playing in our huge backyard with Amira and after hearing his voice I stiffed carrying a ball in my hand and saw mom running towards the study room. I quickly sent Amira back to her house 'cause I know the next turn would be mine...

After an hour went by, I saw my mom helping the maid cleaning dishes. I walked towards her, peeked through the side, and saw her cheek swollen... she tried to hide her cheek with her scarf so that I couldn't see but as she slides her scarf at the front I saw she had bruises on her neck which I think that her whole back was filled with bruises... In order to check, I patted her back. She squeezed it and patched her lips together in order to not let out any sound, I looked down at her hands they were all fine but she stopped chopping off the vegetables and was just moving the knife on the already chopped off piece.

In a second after this, I heard my dad yelling my name in anger. I walked towards his room. I knocked on the door and my dad said roughly to enter inside, My whole body was shivering and I felt that I peed my pants a little in fear.

"Where the hell have you been this late?" he asked resting his head over his palms onto the back of the bed.

"I..I was in the backyard a..." Words were not leaving from my mouth, suddenly as I was about to continue he spoke.

"Playing with Amira, Right?" he said looking onto the ceiling.

I shook my head "no..."

Again he cut me off and blasted on me after he stood up furiously from the bed. "You just shut your mouth little head! You are not a kid anymore you are 15 and playing with that poor rat?"

I finally for the first and second last time tried to spoke, " D... dad, Y..you can not c..call her a poor ...r...rat. She is just a k..id and..."

He said coming closer to me I tried to back away but he was fast and said standing in front of me " A FIVE-YEAR-OLD DAUGHTER OF A MAID AND-HOW-DARE-YOU?"

In a Flash, I was hit by his huge heavy palm on my cheek and the last thing I remembered was on the ground and everything fades away until it was all dark. After that, I woke up around the beeping sound of the ventilator...I still remember this was the day when I offered my first prayer in hospital. '