chapter 12

1. A very rich married man was having an affair with an Italian woman . One night , she confided in him that she was pregnant . The man not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage , told the Italian woman he would pay her a large sum of money if she would to Italy to secretly have the child . And If she stayed in Italy to raise the child , he would also provide child support until the child turned 18. The Italian woman was skeptical but she agreed , she then asked how he would know when the baby was born . To keep it discreet , he told her to simply mail him a post card , and write ' Spaghetti ' on the back . And once he got the postcard he would then arrange for the child support to begin . One day , about 9 months later , he came home to his confused wife . ' Sweetie , she said , you received a very strange post card today from Italy . ' Oh , just give it to me and I'll explain it later , ' he said . The wife said ok and then watched as her husband read the card , turned white , and fainted . On the card was written : Spaghetti , Spaghetti , Spaghetti . Two with meatballs , one without . Send extra sauce.

2. An elderly couple walk into a fast food restaurant , They order one hamburger , one order 3. fries ar one drink . The old man unwraps the plain hamburger and carefully cuts it in half . He places one half in front of his wife . He then carefully counts out the fries , dividing them into two piles and neatly placing one pile in front of his wife . He takes a sip of the drink , his wife takes a sip and then sets the cup down between them . As he begins to eat his few bites of hamburger , the people around them keep looking over and whispering " That poor old couple - all they can afford is one meal for the two of them . " As the man begins to eat his fries a young man comes to the table . He politely offers to buy another meal for the old couple . The old man replies that they're just fine - they're just used to sharing everything . The surrounding people noticed the little old lady hadn't eaten a bite . She sits there watching her husband eat and occasionally taking turns sipping the drink . Again the young man comes over and begs them to let him buy another meal for them . This time the old woman says " No , thank you , we are used to sharing everything . " As the old man finishes and was wipes his face neatly with the napkin , the young man again comes over to the little old lady who had yet to eat a single bite of food and asks " May I ask what is it you are waiting for ? " The old woman answers ... " THE TEETH . "

3. Here's a truly heartwarming story about the bond formed between a little 5 - year - old girl and some construction workers that will make you believe that we all can make a difference when we give a child the gift of our time . A young family moved into a house , next to a vacant lot . One day , a construction crew turned up to start building a house on the empty lot . The young family's 5 - year - old daughter naturally took an interest in all the activity going on next door and spent much of each day observing the workers . Eventually the construction crew , all of them " gems - in - the - rough , " more or less , adopted her as a kind of project mascot . They chatted with her , let her sit with them while they had coffee and lunch breaks , and gave her little jobs to here and there to make her feel important . At the end of the first week , they even presented her with a pay envelope containing ten dollars . The little girl took this home to her mother who suggested that she take her ten dollars " pay " she ' d received to the bank the next day to start a savings account . When the girl and her mom got to the bank , the teller was equally impressed and asked the little girl how she had come by her very own pay check at such a young age . The little girl proudly replied , " I worked last week with a real work crew building the new house next door to us . " " Oh my goodness gracious , " said the teller , " and will you be working on the house again this week , too ? " The little girl replied , " I will , if those assholes at Home Depot ever deliver the skin ' sheet rock ... " Kind of brings a tear to the eye - doesn't it ?

4. Here's a truly heartwarming story about the bond formed between a little 5 - year - old girl and some construction workers that will make you believe that we all can make a difference when we give a child the gift of our time . A young family moved into a house , next to a vacant lot . One day , a construction crew turned up to start building a house on the empty lot . The young family's 5 - year - old daughter naturally took an interest in all the activity going on next door and spent much of each day observing the workers . Eventually the construction crew , all of them " gems - in - the- rough , " more or less , adopted her as a kind of project mascot . They chatted with her , let her sit with them while they had coffee and lunch breaks , and gave her little jobs to do here and there to make her feel important . At the end of the first week , they even presented her with a pay envelope containing ten dollars . The little girl took this home to her mother who suggested that she take her ten dollars " pay " she ' d received to the bank the next day to start a savings account . When the girl and her mom got to the bank , the teller was equally impressed and asked the little girl how she had come by her very own pay check at such a young age . The little girl proudly replied , " I worked last week with a real work crew building the new house next door to us . " " Oh my goodness gracious , " said the teller , " and will you be working on the house again this week , too ? " The little girl replied , " I will , if those assholes at Home Depot ever deliver the mokin ' sheet rock ... " Kind of brings a tear to the eye - doesn't it ?