Jung Hoon

When I woke up the next morning he was long gone. I checked the time and it was almost 9 in the morning. I got up from the bed and had a shower and came downstairs. I saw breakfast on the table with a note.

Good morning. Have breakfast. And I won't be back today. I plan on going to my parents'

I read the note and a smile crept on my lips as soon as I saw a small heart at the bottom of the note. I was having coffee and breakfast that he left for me when I heard my phone ring. I got hold of it to see manager Hyung calling.

"Hyung" I said receiving the call.

"Check the news now" he said in a concern as well in an angry tone.

"What happened hyung?" I asked as I switched on the television. And what I saw after that was heart wrenching. It was news about me and him. There were pictures of me and him holding hands while we were at the submarine. I remembered kind of feeling a flash there but now It was all coming back to me. Paparazzi were following us all along.

"Come to the office now" Hyung said.

He disconnected the call. As soon as I put down my phone it hit me Josh. I dialed his number but he wasn't receiving my call. I got all tensed all sorts of thoughts flowing through me.

Is he alright? Why isn't he picking up his phone? Should I go check on him? Trains of thoughts running through me. I rushed back to my room and got dressed as fast as I could and drove over to the office.

Once at the entrance of the office I saw angry fans holding up post cards and banners. I somehow went past them and went straight to my manager's office.

"Hyung" I called out once I was in his cabin.

"Jung Hoon, don't worry our cyber team is working on it" he said assuring me.

"What about him?" I couldn't help myself but ask.

"Where is he now?" he asked.

"Hospital" I answered.

"Don't worry he will be fine" he said patting on my shoulders.

"Hyung what have I done? He must be terrified right now. He won't even pick up my calls?" I said sitting down on the couch.

"Don't worry Jung Hoon, he is a strong one. I am sure he is fine" he assured me.

"But still let me call him ok. Don't worry" he said.

He called him.

"Josh" manager hyung called out after a few rings.

"Yes Hyung" he answered.

"Are you ok?" he asked.

"Ya I am fine. Hyung is Jung Hoon fine" he asked in a concerned tone.

"He is here talk to him" manager hyung held out the phone to me.

"Hey" I said switching off the loud speaker and holding the phone against my ears.

"Hey, how are you doing?" he asked.

"I am doing alright. Are you fine?" I asked him.

"Don't worry about me." He said.

"I am sorry, it is all because of me" he said after a moment of silence. I was sure that tears were rolling down his cheeks. I wanted to run to him right at that moment but controlled myself from doing so.

"Sssshhhh" I shushed him. "No josh it's not your fault. I should have been more careful" I comforted him.

"If anything comes up call me ok. And pick up your damn phone when I call you. You wanna give me a heart attack or what" I raised my voice unknowingly.

"I am sorry for shouting" I said as soon as I realized what had I done.

"No, it is fine" he said. "Bye I gotta go" he added before disconnecting the call.

I gave the phone to manager hyung. I sat there not knowing what to do anymore. I could hear the fans shouting, saying me clarify the situations, demanding answers downstairs.

"Hyung what should I do?" I asked looking up to him.

"What do you wanna do?" he asked me back.

"I don't know" I said looking down holding my head in my hands.

"You do love him right?" he finally asked.

"More than I could've ever loved someone" I answered.

"I know Jung Hoon, you've been so happy this last few months" he said.

"Think through it. Whatever decision you make I'll go with it. You know that I am always with you" he said sitting down next to me.

I pulled him into a hug feeling really conflicted at what to do and comforted at the same time that I have my loved ones with me.

After spending the afternoon, the cyber team pulled down all the pictures of me and him from every site of the internet. But I thought what use would be as news channels already made a big deal out of it.

I went straight back to home. I wanted to go him. I needed him with me. But again he said he was going to his parents'. So, I thought against and decided to give him some space. I called him once in the evening to check how he was doing. I took a shower and lay down on my bed, staring at the ceiling. What my manager told me was ringing in my head. Whatever decision I make but what? And how? I kept thinking. I didn't care about anything but being with him. But I knew how aggressive the fans can be. What if they did something to him?

I scrolled all over my phone reading the comments below the news article about us. The comments were nasty but it somehow felt good that some of them understood and were willing to accept it. I looked through my gallery through the photos we took while we were there. He looked so damn happy in those photos. His smile wide and sparks n his eyes. I loved seeing him happy and now he must be all tensed up.

I couldn't sleep the whole night. I kept tossing myself side to side. Changing my sleeping position from time to time but no, the sleep was far-far away from me. I closed my eyes remembering him enjoying every bit of our weekend together and whenever I opened my eyes, reality hits me, him being not next to me on my bed.