Denial

Sandra falls deeper into her coma as everyone around her start moving forward with their lives. Endlessly sleeping as the world around her keeps on turning. Her body shrinks with every passing week and her mind shows no outward signs of improvement. Unbeknownst to even the doctors Sandra has taken in everything around her, and her subconscious begins to integrate her surroundings with her unconscious world that she's living in. In an attempt to protect itself her mind starts to connect information and project a normal life. In this life Del has become so important and familiar to Sandra that she has brought upon a sort of secondary consciousness. Del is real to her now, as real as anything else in her world. Every action Adelyn takes molds the Del in Sandra's reality. Not knowing the effect she has on her. They begin to have conversations Adelyn has never had with her on the outside. A small subconscious part of her mind knows something isn't right. Slowly it's been trying to understand what has happened to itself and come to terms with the trauma it has endured. Her mind is in constant battles with itself over what is reality and what is dream and shifts depending on what side is winning.

"We have been seeing each other for almost four months, now right?" Sandra questioned.

"Yes, four amazing months" Del replied awaiting the other shoe to drop.

"Then why haven't you kissed me yet?" exasperated and upset she stood right in front of Del urging her to do it.

"I ... I don't know. I guess I want your consent" she answered honestly and moved away. This action stems from Adelyn's real-life actions, Sandra knows she's holding back but cannot understand why or what is stopping her from showing her feelings openly.

"I don't understand what you mean, I'm asking for it right now." confused and hurt she relents. "Don't you want to kiss me?"

"Yes, I do but it's not the right time. I show you that I care in other ways." she reaches for her hand and places her cheek against it feeling her warmth rise to meet her. Sandra gazes into those piercing blue eyes wishing so badly for her lips to meet.

"I'm sorry, it's all my fault." Del feels her gaze intensify. The phone rings interrupting the argument. Sandra answers "Hello?"

"Yes, this is Pam from St. Louis hospital may I speak to Adelyn?"

"Who? Do you mean Del? Here" she hands the phone to Del.

"Adelyn Tracy speaking"

"We need you to come to floor three please" the voice quietly echo's.

"Alright I'm on my way" Del grabs her stuff, kisses Sandra on the forehead and walks out the door.

"Ugh why does she always do that; can't she see I'm talking here."

'ring ring' "Hey Clark can I talk to you for a bit? I feel like I'm going mad. There are so many odd things Del does that I can't figure it out. What if there's something wrong with her?"

"I'm sure it's not a big deal your happy, aren't you?"

"Well yes but I want more, and she says she can't give me more, that it's not the right time. What does that mean? You don't think she's already taken, do you?"

"Well that is a possibility, I wouldn't have pegged her a cheater, but I've been wrong before. Remember your last relationship, yeah I was very wrong." Clark winces at the memory of it.

"I hope that's not the case, because I'm falling for her and I can't stop." Sandra breaks into tears.

"Your usually so calm and collected this girl has got your emotions running all over the place." the concern prevalent in Clarks tone of voice.

"I just ...I don't know what to do. She's seems so caring the way she holds my hand and volunteers at the hospital. But she's holding back every time I bring up intimacy, she acts as if she didn't even hear."

"Think about what you want her to do then talk to her about it."

"That's actually decent advice Clark. I'll try it thank you for listening, bye." she hangs up the phone, sighing loudly. Sandra feels unsure if she should pursue this line of thinking or give up and move on with her life.

Sandra wakes up in her bed feeling something isn't right but can't put her finger on what it could be. Something's changed she lays in bed staring at the ceiling pondering all her interactions with Del.

"Maybe she is seeing someone else?" sighing loudly she decides to call in sick today, planning to consolidate her thoughts and maybe confront Del with her feelings. Opening a notebook, she jots down the main reasons for her thoughts:

1. Del is always running off in the middle of speaking with her, like she just doesn't care what I have to say.

2. Sometimes I don't see her for long periods of time and can never get a hold of her with the phone.

3. She won't kiss me.

Sandra looks at the last thing on her list and sighs loudly wondering what's wrong with her. "Why won't she kiss me if she agrees that we are together." frustrated she tosses her notebook to the floor. Laying back on her bed she thinks aloud "she's funny and sweet and always seems to be there for me" Sighing again she rolls over to pick up her notebook unable to just leave it on the floor. She heaves herself up from the bed and makes her way into the kitchen searching for some breakfast. She drops the notebook onto the counter and runs her slender fingers across her strong, yet feminine, jawline contemplating her next move.

'tap tap tap' a light knocking was heard from the front door before it was pushed open and Del walked in "Hey, I had the day off, so I figured I'd drop by and see you." Del grabbed her hand and smiled that sad smile she has always worn. She leads her into the kitchen to make them some coffee planning to pry information from her once they are settled in. "Here's your coffee sweetie" she places the cup in front of her and sits nearby hand in hand. "So, I was thinking we should do something together, all we do is hold hands and talk. Don't get me wrong I love talking with you but I'm not an old woman yet." she laughs as she searches Del's face.

"I've been working a lot and volunteering at the hospital with any free time I have. I know it can't make up for everything but I'm trying." Del replies.

"I know you're a busy woman and we only see each other a few times a week but maybe you could find one day, maybe today? You said it's your day off right, we could go to the movies?" Sandra pleas. Some time passes with no answer. She realizes she's been quiet for a few minutes and looked at Del "Um how's volunteering going? How's the boy um Tommy?"

"Bobby drew you another picture today, it's of you in Dreamland with cotton candy skies and chocolate dirt" her sad smile returned "he said that's what he dreams about, I told him he should dream up a boat cause that chocolate dirt is going to melt and become a river" Adelyn laughs at the thought of him floating down a chocolate river.

"I want to go boating down a river with you this afternoon." saying it just for the reaction but nothing happened. "Nothing? Seriously?" she exclaimed out loud on accident startling herself.

"I should go" Adelyn replies as she stands up and walks out the door. Sandra knows something's wrong but doesn't understand what it could be. Adelyn walks out without another word.

Sandra frustrated with the events decides to get dressed and takes her car on a drive to clear her head. She drives around just thinking, going nowhere in particular she sees a sign that she always passes on her way to work but she's never been down that road before. She figures it could help to have some new scenery, so she makes the turn down the road. After a few seconds she notices she's back on the road to work. "I know I took that turn" she sees the turn again attempting to take it again she pops back to the same road towards work. "What's going on?" she calls Clark "Hey do you know that road.. Haven street? Where does it lead?"

"I don't know, never been down it." he replies.

"What do you mean you've never been on it? I've seen you pull out of that road on your way to work. Don't you live down that road?"

"I really couldn't say, didn't you say you were sick today?" Clark's voice has a taunting undertone to it.

"Yeah uh I guess it's worse than I thought." she sighs before turning around to go home.

"Rest up I'll see you tomorrow" 'click' he hangs up the phone.

After tossing and turning for the past week pondering her situation she lays in bed staring at the ceiling "Maybe I'm stressed out. I just need to take charge of my life. Yeah, that's what I'm going to do." she jumps to her feet feeling reenergized and confident, slipping on the nicest clothes she has she heads for toward her car. She starts imagining what might be down that road.

"I think I heard somewhere there was a park down that road, I bet it's beautiful!" determined to prove herself wrong she takes the turn onto that road with the sign reading Haven street and low and behold there is a magnificent park. The trees are large and shady, the slight breeze tussles the leaves about. The playground is magnificent, large structures made from rope to climb on and soft rubberized ground. Slides and doodads all about surrounded by several teeter totters and those little bouncing spring mounted animals of different varieties, and a large merry-go-round right in the center of it all armed with belt straps to keep children from flying off. Satisfied she thinks to herself "That's exactly how I imagined it would be, and I wasn't disappointed" After a moment's gazing she feels accomplished and returns to the path to work.

Sitting down for the daily grind she thinks about how that grumpy Mr. Burtlet never did call to complain like she thought he might, she'd secretly hoped he would disappear and she would not have to deal with him anymore. "Who could imagine things would start going so well?" she thought to herself. Clark came by as expected to tell her good morning and even brought her a latte. The thought had just crossed her mind that she forgot to stop by her favorite coffee shop due to her delightful detour. "The only thing that could make this day any better was...Del!" she spotted Del mid-sentence and embraced her. Del smiled lovingly.

"Don't you have work today?" Sandra nuzzled into Del's warmth smiling happily.

"I have the day off so I wanted to come by and tell you how much I love you and bring you some lunch for later." squeezing Sandra affectionately before asking "Maybe you can take the rest of the day off and we can spend the day together?"

"Actually, I have a very important project that I'm finalizing today, guess which one." Sandra's excitement is hardly contained when she bursts out with "Your house! Your gorgeous dream home will finally start construction! " Sandra's joy is overflowing.

"Really? That's great! I'm so excited to see it built." Del's excitement matches Sandra's joy. "I will let you get back to work then" she leans in for a kiss. The embarrassment rushing to Sandra's face she decides to place a loving gentle kiss upon Adelyn's forehead instead of a steamy and passionate one, which would be extremely inappropriate in this public work environment. Adelyn left with a skip in her step while Sandra's face beamed so bright she thought she would burst. She sat down to look over her project and noticed the budget has increased allowing leeway for the balcony she had envisioned the first time she laid eyes on this project. She sketched out a rough draft and set it on top of the original piece as an overlay to get her angles just right. This addition will add a lot of esthetic to what is already an amazing design plan while adding a great place to enjoy a lazy day. "Yes, right there would be perfect! This position allows for just the right amount of sunlight while being shaded during the peak of day." She sketched it onto each view of the house for the engineers to work off of making sure the dimensions were precise to real life she used a known measurement of one meter per one inch on a ruler. This comparison is how Architectural designers and engineers a-like draw objects to scale. Taking one last look she scanned and printed out several copies to be used by the team of engineers to construct the plan from paper to real life.

Sandra took her lunch and headed for the site where the dream house shall be built. Looking around she notices dozens of workers already shipping materials over and creating the foundation filling wooden boxes with concrete. She wonders how long the concrete takes to set, hoping it's a quick drying substance, wanting to see the progress before her very eyes. Looking around the property her eyes are drawn to landscape, rolling hills in an ocean of green grass so vibrant it's as if it were a scene from a painting. Splaying out her body across the land she feels the soft blades of grass tickle her face. The aroma percolating the air was not grass but the smell of Hydrangea. The scene enraptured every one of Sandra's senses, bursting with pleasure as the sun's warmth wrapped her like a blanket. The blue sky filled with writhing winds dancing along the trees as a woman approaches from behind.

"Del lay with me, it's so beautiful." she reaches for her with a great smile. Del gracefully sits down next to her with a basket of goodies prepared for a picnic. Sandra eyes the basket as her stomach rumbles, she sits up and leans into Del "You are absolutely perfect" she whispers just before closing the gap with a loving kiss. Sandra then reaches into the well-made wicker basket and pulls out a small black box. "Adelyn Eve Tracy, will you marry me?" speaking slowly as she reveals the large diamond placed precariously atop a glistening gold ring.

Del gasps as tears form at the corners of her eyes "Yes, a thousand times yes!" they embrace each other tears of happiness falling silently around them.