8 - Excitement, adventures. Not so keen on them myself.
"What's a deer?"
"What's an antelope?"
Damn. So much for trying camp side songs to keep spirits up. Of course none of the ones admittedly fuzzy in my memory reference anything recognisable to anyone but me.
"Well, do any of you know any songs to sing round a fire?" I say.
Blank looks mostly. That could be because a few days ago they were looking forward to being hauled off to Hutt Space and an uncertain future as slaves. They're in shock. Also not helping is the Jedi who literally dropped out of the sky to rescue them insisting on a sing along. I can see how that would be weird to them. It certainly is to me.
Why am I here? Not just an ages old philosophical question but an extremely pertinent one. What actions, both my own and others have led me to here, in a swamp with a dozen or so rescues? Hmm.
-----
"Dee-Jay?" it's Anakin tugging at me to wake me up.
I awake to the dim lighting of the small cabin aboard the Oberus Star. "What is it Anakin?"
"I think something bad is going to happen." he says.
I wake up. Fast. This isn't a kid having a bad dream. This is Anakin bloody Skywalker. If he says 'something wicked this way comes' you better damn believe it. I scramble out of the bunk, dress and telekinetically summon my lightsabre from where it had rolled under the bunk. Half a minute and I'm good to go. Well, as good as I can be on no sleep and a lot of apprehension.
"Let's get going." I say.
Anakin nods and we walk quickly towards the bridge. As we do so I glance out the viewing windows at the swirls of hyperspace. Wow. I pause. I have been living on another planet, talk to aliens on a regular basis but sights like this reminding me I am on an actual spaceship really blows me away.
"Dee-Jay!" calls Anakin ahead, noticing I have stopped.
Yes. Right. Attend to the peril first. Afterwards you can gawk at the wonders and marvels. I get moving again.
"No passengers on, oh Master Jedi." says the duty officer, a Grey Alien. No really. Short, grey skin, big head and even bigger eyes. Only divergence from how they're traditionally depicted is the Merchant's Guild uniform it's wearing.
"My apprentice sensed we are in danger. We are here to assist." I say.
The Grey inspects a console and confers with another crew member before coming back to us.
"We are currently in hyperspace and not due to enter sublight for another three hours. I don't think..." begins the Grey but is cut off as the entire ship shakes and the view outside changes abruptly from blue and white swirls to mostly black, white pin-pricks and an evil looking spaceship pointing at us. It looks like a shark, if said shark had thrusters, guns, was several hundred metres long and had an honest to goodness skull emblazoned on the front. I know I'm in a universe that runs on pulp conventions, but seriously?
"Pirates! Send a transmission. Wide band, call for assistance. All crew, prepare for boarding. This is not a drill. All passengers, please stay in your quarters and remain calm." says the Grey over the ship comms.
I look at Anakin.
"So, where will they make the boarding attempt?" I say to Anakin.
He looks up at me, closes his eyes briefly and then opens them before turning for the door.
"Come on. This way." he says as he breaks into a run. I follow.
-----
Soon after we are waiting by the main airlock. Myself on the left, Anakin on the right. While in our hands our lightsabres are still inactive.
"Okay Anakin. Once they connect we open the door." I say.
"And then we get them." completes Anakin with a feral grin.
'Yes. An excellent idea. Listen to your apprentice.' comes the voice in my ear. I can feel hands snaking about me. Feel her breath. 'They're pirates. Designated bad guys. It is perfectly okay to slaughter them.'
I could just relax. Let the. No. It's the Avatar of Cosmic Evil.
"We will give them a chance to surrender first." I say. Because we're Jedi, the good guys. Not particularly exciting, but there you are.
"Why?" says Anakin clearly unimpressed and looking forwards to pirate murder.
'Yes why? These are not jolly scoundrels. All Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum. These are murderers, rapists, slavers. Would you like to see what they did to their last victim?'
A woman. Naked, bruised and bleeding, banging frantically on an airlock door. The other door opens and she is whisked off to die in the void of space.
The Dark Side is nothing if not persistent. It knows every single button to press.
'This is what they are. This is what they will continue to do if left alive. You can end it now. Let me help love.'
"Dee-Jay!" says Anakin, breaking the spell. "It's her, isn't it?"
I nod.
"She wants you to just kill them."
Another nod.
"So, we don't do that." concludes Anakin.
Am I getting help resisting the Dark Side from Anakin? That's enough to snap me out of it. Just in time too. I hear the soft thud as the ships connect. I open the door and activate my lightsabre.
On the other side of the door is a short tube, several nasty looking beings all paused in the act of psyching up to storm in.
Do Jedi get some training on clever things to say in moments like this? Alas, there is no line prompter to one side, because this is real. We stare at each other for a few seconds.
"What are you, waiting for? Get them!" yells a pirate. One of them fires and then it all becomes a blur.
'Do you mean it controls your actions?' I remember the line from the film as I twist, step, parry, slash and stab my way through the throng. The lightest touch severs fingers and destroys blasters, a 'graze' across a pirate's front leaves a massive burn and he drops in shock, a low cut to the thigh and they are amputated.
Then, it is over. The shuttle is a slaughterhouse, pirates lie everywhere, dead, dying or insensate. Several are screaming. The air is full of the smell of offal and burnt flesh. I stagger back into the liner and throw up. As I do so I become aware of someone tugging on my robes. Anakin.
"You okay?" he asks. He seems totally unbothered by all the carnage.
I finish emptying my stomach.
"No. We need to get moving. The pirates back on their ship are soon going to realise what's happened. We need to get over there." I say weakly and begin staggering in the direction of the liners shuttle bay.
"More pirates." says Anakin excitedly as he follows.
Of course he's enjoying this, what did I expect from Vader in training?
-----
Now we are doing the same thing the pirates attempted. This probably wouldn't work on any ship run by a military, but these are pirates. Some opportunist nicking back with a purloined shuttle and loot is probably normal. Probably. It's all a bit tense until Anakin bumps us up against the pirate and we connect. We're just about to cut our way in when the door opens.
"Alright, which one of..." begins the pirate's sole concession to security before reaching to draw his blaster.
Two steps and a quick swipe and he is on the ground clutching the stump of his arm. I step over the pirate and we continue into the ship.
Twenty minutes later it is done. Made easier by how most of the 'crew' were prisoners held at blaster point and many of the pirates decided on surrendering to the crazed Jedi in blood soaked robes. That's a little detail this place differs from PG movieland. Lightsabres cut through anything, Weapons, clothing, armour plate and body parts. Oh gods, the body parts. Cauterisation is neither instant, nor guaranteed, what with all the weird alien biologies involved. The Force also doesn't consider 'dodging arterial spray' a high priority. Anakin is relatively clean, since Chosen One, can't get him messed up.
Currently I am standing outside a door where the prisoners are while Anakin coms the liner. Specifically, I am guarding them from the crew. There's a small crowd in the hall with me. Understandably, they want revenge.
"Step aside Jedi." says their leader, a red hued man with horns. The spokesman is Satan. Figures.
"I cannot do that." I say. keeping my arms folded.
"Why not? They're animals." screams a Mon Cal shaking a fist. It occurs to me that they're quite big.
"Yeah. We'll take care of 'em for you." says a human.
"No. Vengeance is not the answer. Leave justice to the authorities. Piracy comes with stiff penalties." I say. This seems to mollify them. They back off a little. Everyone takes a breath.
The blast catches everyone by surprise. The bolt impacts the wall besides me. It's a yellow hued near human woman holding her left side with one hand and the blaster in the other.
"No! I don't care! You don't know, what they're like!" she says while the blaster waves erratically in front of her.
I unfold my arms and hold them out. "I am a Jedi. It is my job to protect..."
"You're protecting that filth!" she yells the blaster steadies and points at me.
I take a few steps toward her, no sudden moves.
"No. You. You are not a killer. Not yet. That's not something you can undo." I say
"But, but." she says.
"No. It never ends. You need healing, not vengeance." I say and take hold of the blaster. The woman lets go of it and collapses sobbing against me.
"Dee-Jay!" calls out Anakin. "I sent the message. They're sending the other shuttle over."
"Good. Good. Take these people back in our shuttle, get things moving." I say. Anakin nods and leads the crew away to the shuttle.
-----
It takes a few hours to get everyone transferred over and safely in medical or a now very packed brig. Anakin and I are returning to the Pirate Ship to leave a nav beacon so the Patrol can come scuttle it while the liner heads for the nearest system.
"Dee-Jay" starts my apprentice, "Why did you not use the Force on those people? It would of been easier."
"Yes. I suppose it would have. So. Wave my hand and make them all stand down and disperse?" I say. Anakin nods. "Why didn't I do that?"
Anakin gives this some thought and a few 'Ums' as we dock again up against the Pirate vessel. We make contact and board the vessel, walking towards the bridge.
"Any ideas?" I say as we step over some bodies.
Anakin shakes his head.
"Those people were desperate, fearful and angry. Using the Force to influence them could have been unpredictable." I say.
"Is that why?" asks Anakin.
"There's more. They were also slaves. It would of been cruel to free them and then command them against their will. Being a Jedi isn't just about using our powers but knowing when not to use them."
Anakin scrunches up his face. "That doesn't make sense." he says.
Sorry kid we're mystic pseudo eastern warriors, there's going to be some zen.
"Some things don't make sense Anakin." I say in what must be a total understatement for this universe.
Anakin looks doubtful. "Okay." he says indicating I need to work harder on this and walks into the bridge. He moves over to the nav computer and flicks switches and looks at a screen as prelude to plugging in the beacon.
"Um, Dee-Jay? These pirates have a base. We could go there and activate the beacon. Then the Patrol can go there." he says.
"Okay. Do you know how to jump there?" I say. I don't.
"Oh sure. Shall we go?"
On reflection, a sensible person, a real Jedi would of said something clever like.
'Just note down the coordinates, we can tell the authorities when they arrive,'
instead of;
"Sure, make the jump Anakin." which is what I did say.
-----
And so there we were. Landing at the base Anakin and I cautiously advance down the boarding ramp. There are several pirates with a coffle of slaves nearby. Prompted by the Force I activate my lightsabre as does Anakin.
"I don't suppose everyone would consider surrendering?" I try before one of them goes for his blaster and then it's all on.
Slide, jump, twist, strike.
"Arghhh!"
Duck, roll, throw.
"Aiieee! My leg!"
Spin, push, leap, slash. The decapitated corpse in front of me falls. Sensing no more danger I look about Anakin has seen to four of the others while the last runs away. Then it's a bit of delicate work cutting apart the coffle on the prisoners.
"Jedi, were saved!"
"Thank you Jedi."
Just before I can order everyone onto the ship I receive a prompting from the Force. Quite simple really.
"Run!" I yell echoing the prompt and herd everyone away from the ship. Just in time as iridescent bolts rain from the sky and a series of explosions marches across the landing area. It belatedly occurs to me that everyone was conveniently on hand for a reason. Also that the runner must of got a message off.
The other cruiser comes into view. It is large grey and bulbous. I spend little time contemplating it as I lead everyone to the base wall, cut a hole and direct everyone through. Just before Anakin is about to leave he looks at me.
"The beacon! We'll need it to get help! I'll just get it." he says, running back to the ship we came in.
"Anakin!"
"Don't worry Dee-Jay. I'll find you!" he calls back still running.
I can see the cruiser landing. Time to go. Escape and evade. I leap through the hole.
"This way!" I call to the people I am supposed to be rescuing and we run into the wilds of, where?
I have no idea where I am, what planet I am on and my charge is running in the opposite direction. Shmi is going to kill me.
Damn all exciting adventures.
-----
Okay, so yes, that is why I am stuck on Leviatha. It's been two days of being cold, wet and hungry. My charges look exhausted and I'm not much better. Behind us I can hear the search party getting closer.
'Give in to me and I will make this better.' cajoles the Dark Side.
No. Never. Keep going.
'If you die here Palpatine wins. I can stop that love. Give in I will give you the strength to survive.'
Damn. There is a kernel of wisdom though in the beguiling.
"That raised area there. Make for that." I say.
"Won't they see us?" asks Leah, some sort of humanoid mammal like reptile.
"I am hoping they will." I say as I turn and dive into the water.
Humans are a common sight in this universe, but how well does anyone really know them? After all, we're everywhere doing normal things while other species get noted for things we are not. Wookies strong, Nemoidians cunning, bald guys with big heads smart and so on. How many know that humans can swim? Really well? Or can hold their breath for some time and even longer if you're a stoic space knight with mystic powers.
It doesn't take long. The skimmer appears and heads straight for the quarry going right past me. I turn and launch myself out of the water like being shot from a cannon. Landing on the skimmer I activate the blade and swing twice, stab and send a wave of telekinesis to knock the two remaining goons into the water. Neither bug thing or leatherface are at all aquatic or maybe it's just that these two goons can't swim. After that it's a moment to work out the controls and pick up the others. A quick search turns up rat packs, dry clothing and blasters. Emboldened we set off across the swamp and away from the enemy.
-----
A couple of days later my com beeps. I activate it.
"Anakin! You're in range! Where are you?" I say.
"Right above you." comes the reply.
I look up and spy a small olive green ship descending. As it's ramp opens I guide my charges onboard and am greeted by Anakin.
"Anakin, thank you." I say and fall to the floor in the hold of our rescuer.
"Typical Coruscant. Always needing us to pull your asses out of where it doesn't belong." comes a new voice.
I look in the direction of the newcomer. Black boots. Green leggings and tunic. Lightsabre at her hip.
Great. Rescued by a Green Jedi. Was intending on meeting them, just in a state where I was able to make a better first impression.
"Thank you..." I begin, fishing for a name.
"I am Knight Captain Hera Koll. You can thank me by cleaning yourself up and then explaining what you are doing in our territory." she says abruptly before walking away.
I briefly consider falling asleep right there before getting Anakin to help me up and staggering off to do as the nice Knight Captain says. Is it too late to go back to exciting adventures?