20 - Shaping up and shipping out
"Didn't know they existed. I have been taking these tablets." I say, trying not to appear the complete lout.
"Tablets! Are you, no wait. My gods. Gods. Gods." says Shayla as she moves about, takes a quick blood sample from her arm, checks her pad and waits until the scanner beeps. She starts breathing in a regular manner once she has read the results. "Well, my implant is still working perfectly. Unlike your brain. What were you thinking?"
I was thinking 'Male Oral Contraceptive, damn cool'. Of course I had thought that years ago now. Considered reliable enough for an Order of mostly celibate mystics. However we might be out of date given the way Shayla's reacting as if I have just confessed to using hastily sewn sheep intestine.
"They seemed bleeding edge compared to my homeworld's tech base. Not Galactic standard?" I say.
"No! Why did I fall for a damn Neobarb? Anything else you don't know about?" says Shayla.
"Not sure. I don't know what I don't know." I confess.
"Can sing, can dance, can use a lightsabre. I can't say I wasn't warned. Very well, on the bed." orders my doctor.
I comply and then get a jab that quickly numbs my left side. Shayla then works a few more devices for a few minutes.
"You are lucky I like you. Pants." comes the next order. Shayla then removes a patch of skin, places the implant and then applies skinfoam and a bacta wrap. "Right, no pirates, assassins, falling off mountains, ill-advised Jedi Healing and whatever else you and your mad apprentice can dream up for a few days. Promise me."
I hold up my hand. "I promise." I say. This seems to satisfy her.
"So, how did you find out?" she asks after a while.
"Would you believe a school play?" I said.
-----
"Tell me more. Tell me more. Was it love at first sight?"
"Tell me more. Tell me more. Did she put up a fight?"
I have had many surreal experiences since waking up in a Galaxy Far Far Away. I've walked on other worlds, casually flipped off Newton and Einstien. Dealt with aliens, weird zen-like philosophies and confronted ancient evil. The sight of Anakin Skywalker, aka Darth Vader playing Danny in a production of Grease is definitely in the Top Ten. It's his last year at school.
Most, okay, all of it is my fault. Sacha is a local playwright who has access to an extra dimensional traveller who knows an awful lot of show tunes. Not the most useful ability, I must admit, but you work with the gifts you have. Grease has had a pretty good run and the local school in Theed is doing a production of it with advice from the 'creator'. It's has a few changes from the original, what with speeders instead of cars and the whole Rizzo subplot needing work because accidental pregnancy is really hard here. Both participants implants need to fail or be switched off. To say that's so improbable as to be impossible is understating their reliability. Eventually Sacha resorted to 'teenagers be idiots' with Rizzo and Kikenny not being unable to remember whether they had switched off or not and basically being, well, idiots. Sandy is from Alderaan by the way. Australia being a bit too far.
All that aside, the rather silly plot wends it way around the musical numbers. What's surprising is how much your average Galactic citizen likes theatre if the runs of this and Sacha's other creations are any judge. I guess they don't have Netflix or World of Warcraft to distract them. The other is who's attending.
"Ms Amidala. What a surprise to see you at a local production." I say to the elegantly dressed woman in front of me. Her companion looks kind of familiar. That's not surprising given every major character is a dead ringer for an Earth actor but I cant place him. Young chap, in their thirties perhaps?
"I'm here to support Ani. Oh, where are my manners. Allow me to introduce my companion. This is Commander Wilhuff Tarkin. He's here to aid in greater coordination to make the Rim free." says Padme.
I somehow manage to swallow the contents of my mouth rather than spray it all over what would suddenly become a diplomatic incident.
"I see my reputation precedes me." says Tarkin formally with a nod of his head.
Yeah. You could say that.
"Yes. Anti-Piracy Militia?" I say racking my brain, what did this guy do before becoming an absolute bastard?
"The Outland Regions Security Force. With it, we have brought security and order to Seswenna. With the Sky Marshall here I believe we can bring civilisation to the entire Rim." says Tarkin.
Okay, sounds like you're already at regular bastard and just need to put in the hours.
"Hey Dee-Jay, how do you think it's going?" says Anakin, all in black leather, greased hair and fake sideburns. He's no young Travolta but still getting the attention of almost every woman with a pulse. Think I can't tell? Telepath. Strong feelings, like the sort being broadcast here are kinda hard to ignore.
"Ani? Is that you?" says Padme.
"Yeah doll, that's my name. Who's the suit?" Anakin says performing a classic Zuko preen while staring defiantly at Tarkin. "Sacha says I got to stay in character." he adds as an aside.
Tarkin for his part is not fazed by some teen actors antics.
"Anakin Skywalker I believe. I am Commander Wilhuff Tarkin of the Outland Regions Security Force. Tonight of course I have the pleasure of escorting this young lady to your local entertainment. If you are interested in a commission in either of our forces I believe I could arrange something." says Tarkin.
"A G-man. Well, I shall give your offer, all due, consideration." says Anakin.
Since Naboo could well be in another glaciation event before Padme remembers how to speak I decide to help.
"You're doing great Anakin. Perhaps you have missed your true calling. Maybe a visit to the Plavalaguna Conservatory on Inva Mula should be part of our training." I say.
Padme finally manages to reconnect brain to mouth.
"Yes, you would make a fantastic singer Anakin." she says.
"Zuko! Where's Zuko." comes Sacha's voice across the auditorium.
"Well doll. I gotta go. Be seeing you. You too G-Man." says Anakin before sauntering off.
"You cannot seriously be entertaining such a notion. That young man is a natural pilot if his performance liberating this world is any judge. It would be criminal to have him follow a civilian career." says Tarkin.
"Anakin's future will be decided by Anakin. Excuse me, I must return to my seat. However, should he choose the military I am sure the Sky Marshal could find a position under her for him." I say and turn pretending to ignore the gasp behind me.
I reach my seat and hand Shayla her drink,
"What is it?" she asks.
"What is what?" I feign.
"You, are up to something." she accuses.
"Am not, well maybe composing a play, I'll call it 'When Anakin met Padme'. Catchy, no?"
"I think they have already met." points out my companion.
"Yes. As a kid, as a trainee monk, as a mechanic in need of a plasma arc over a shower. Not, like that." I say pointing to my charge strutting back onto the stage.
"Well, that is different." says Shayla laughing.
"Well, honky-tonk baby get on the floor."
"All the cats are yellin they're shoutin for more."
-----
"The Theatre! You're going to train the Chosen One in musical theatre!" screams Abby.
Having had the presence of an Eldritch Abomination visiting my head for the last eight years has given me a sort of insight into her character. Right now, she's upset. It's not the shouting, screaming and yelling. It's how she's forgotten to start in on the torture that's the clue.
"What's the matter? Indoor work, no heavy lifting, well the occasional Soprano, but still." I say.
"You would squander his gifts on learning insipid show tunes?" yells Abby.
"I would encourage his gifts, just not the ones you're interested in. What's wrong with making people happy? While I admit the body count will be less, that's not the only way of keeping score."
Abby takes some steps back, shaking her finger at me. What? Where's the lightning? Tearing off of limbs? Immersion in acid? While I have long since learned to ignore pain in this not quite dream state I have not let on to that. Theatre skills are not totally useless. Is this some new tactic? Abby is ancient and unbelievably powerful, but not particularly creative.
"Destiny will not be denied by the likes of you." she warns before fading away leaving me confused. What, is going on?
I am jolted awake. Opening my eyes, I look straight into Shayla's face.
"I have got some exciting news!" she says.
"You do?" I say, somewhat cautiously. Women waking you with exciting news runs the range from a new haircut, unlikely here, through to new family members incoming.
"I have quit my job and applied for a commission in the Outer Rim Squadron!"
Not my best in the mornings. I struggle to get my brain going at the best of times. It's absolute rubbish when Shayla is sitting on me. You try sentient thought with an excitable green space babe straddling you. Dare ya. Still, I manage to connect various bits and bobs. Outer Rim Squadron. Anti Slavery Fleet. Commander Sky Marshall Amidala, not a Senator.
"That is exciting news. This is what you want?"
"Yes."
"Great! Wait. You already quit your job?" I say, my brain somehow picking out pertinent details.
"Yes. Oh. That was a little premature." she says.
"A little. Who are you? Where's my Space Princess?"
Any reply there may have been quickly became irrelevant.
------
Later in the day Anakin eventually turns up.
"Long night?" I inquire.
Anakin reddens. "Um yeah. There were the presentations, and then speeches and then.."
"The party. How did that go?" asks Shayla besides me.
In reply we get a standard teenaged mumble and a deeper red colour.
"Not particularly informative." I say.
"No. If we commed Grete, we might get a better account." suggests Shayla.
Grete has known Anakin since he came here and has gone from best friend to carries a torch for our Chosen One. Not that Anakin noticed till we clubbed him over the head with the facts. He was then polite, but always 'sorry, Jedi in training'.
Not that that slows anyone down, but still.
"Nothing happened! Okay!" shouts Anakin.
"Sit down Anakin." I say. Anakin glowers, but does sit down. "Now, how much does this have to do with a Commander Tarkin?"
"Who's that?" asks Shayla.
"Padme's plus one two nights ago at the opening." I say.
"Yeah. Him." growls Anakin.
"I think you were focused on the wrong person that night Anakin. I suspect Tarkin's presence was an entirely professional affair." I say, noticing Anakin twitch at the last word.
"You can't know that for sure. I looked him up. Cultured, educated, wealthy, tough on pirates and slavers. He's got everything." says Anakin.
Everything you, an ex-slave and eschewer of worldly things doesn't have.
"There's something he didn't have. I was there Anakin. Padme couldn't take her eyes off you, she could barely speak." I say.
"Really?" says Anakin.
"Really. Barely needed my Jedi powers to see that." I say.
"How come I didn't?" says Anakin.
"Anakin. Your powers are incredible, stronger than any living, but you are still a person with feelings. In this case jealousy. It blinded you, showed you only what you thought was happening and kept you from the truth of things. That can happen to anyone. This is why we Jedi must be cautious and mindful of our feelings. Left unchecked it is a very small number of steps to embracing the Dark Side and losing everything." I say.
Anakin looks at me. Hopefully he's taking the words on board. He then looks at the table, away and back at me.
"There's something else, isn't there?" I say. I then wait while Anakin frets.
"Anakin, tell us, we are your friends." says Shayla.
"I was an idiot. I yelled at Grete, lost my temper." Anakin confesses.
"Is she alive?" I ask. Not a normal question but given who we are speaking to a pertinent one. Anakin nods.
"Yes, I just shouted at her." he says.
"It's good to see you retained some control. It remains that the wrong words can be just as painful as wounds, even more so."
"I told her I didn't love her. That I would never love her." Anakin confesses.
Somehow, I suspect there was more than that. Let's not press though.
"What do you do now?" I say.
"Me? I've done enough already." says Anakin.
You never grew out of this, did you? You never thought you could make things right and instead doubled down in pity and self loathing.
"No you have not. You may think the situation is beyond salvaging, but it's not the case. You can always seek forgiveness. No action, no matter how terrible, is beyond redemption. So you will go and apologise. Now."
Anakin stares back at me. "I, I can't." he says.
I stare back. "You will do this, young Jedi. Because it is what is right. It is what is needed for both of you to heal. To be able to move forward. I will go with you. I will help."
Anakin stares back for some time. "Okay. When."
I stand up. "Now seems a good time. Follow me." I say cheerily
Anakin doesn't move. "Now?" he says.
I have already reached the door. I turn round.
"Yes. Or do you somehow think some more angry brooding will make it easier?" I say.
Anakin ceases frowning and gets up. "I guess not. Okay."
I pause and reach out with the Force. This is getting easier.
"Care to accompany us?" I say to Shayla.
"Me? Wait? Why?" Shayla says.
"Because all things are connected. Trust me." I say.
"What are you planning Neobarb?" says Shayla, rising too.
As we leave I wonder why everyone is so suspicious of me.
-----
Now we are outside of Grete's house. With a little prodding I get Anakin to the door to knock. The door opens to reveal Carlo, Grete's father.
"You! Give me one reason I don't knock your block off." he says raising an arm.
"Because Anakin has come here to apologise." I say.
"Yes, I need to speak to Grete. I am so sorry about what I said to her. Please." says Anakin, head bowed.
"You broke my daughter's heart. Thought you Jedi were better than that." says Carlo.
"I know. I'm sorry. I can't take the words back, but I can apologise for saying them. I was an idiot. A fool. Please." says Anakin.
Carlo looks at Anakin for a while. "Guess I was an idiot at your age too. Still, you can't see her. She's not here." says Carlo.
"When will she be back?" says Anakin.
"Hmm, don't really know. A few years, maybe. Gre's gone and joined that new outfit, as a marine. Couldn't talk her out of it." says Carlo.
Since Anakin is just staring blankly I intervene.
"Thank you Carlo. We shall be going now. Come on Anakin." I say and walk away. Anakin mumbles a good bye and follows us. It quickly becomes apparent we are not going home.
"Dee-Jay. Where are we going." asks Anakin.
"To speak with Grete." I say.
"Oh dear. I know that tone." says Shayla.
"What tone?" I say.
"You know. Anakin. I'll hold him and you run." Shayla says laughing.
"I don't think I can run far enough." says Anakin finally smiling.
-----
A quick trek across town sees us approaching some new buildings. Like such collections everywhere there are people everywhere in uniforms doing things in an orderly manner. Like Naboo buildings everywhere there are lots of plants and trees, giving the whole place a 'one with nature look'. I ask about and find my way to the office in question. Sky Marshall. Outer Rim Squadron.
"Anakin! What brings you here?" says Padme, standing quickly as we enter.
Everyone outside looked pretty busy. Now is not the time for an extended staring contest.
"Anakin needs to speak with one of your recruits. A Ms Grete Hama. Marines, I believe." I say.
"We are preparing for departure, you know." says Padme towards me.
"I did notice. I am training a Jedi." I say.
"Why does Anakin need to speak with one of my marines?" asks Padme.
"Direct us to her and you too can find out." I say with a smile.
We stare at each other for a beat.
"Now I'm intrigued. Okay." says Padme and makes a few entries on her pad. "Just in time. Follow me."
We follow her as she departs. Out the base HQ. Across a landing field to where young people in uniform are getting ready to board a shuttle. Everyone comes to attention.
"Trooper Hama. Come forward." says Padme. Soon Grete is standing in front of everyone. I give my apprentice a nudge.
"You're on." I say.
"Here?" whispers Anakin.
"You think forgiveness is easy?" I say.
Anakin steps forwards. "Grete, I am so sorry. I shouldn't have said those things to you. I, I was an idiot. I didn't mean it." he says.
Grete regards Anakin for a moment. "Permission to express myself freely." she says.
The officer in charge of the company looks at Padme, who nods.
"Permission granted."
Bam! Grete's fist slams into Anakin's stomach. He contracts but then straightens, grimacing.
"Guess I deserved that." says Anakin.
"You did. I'll consider your apology." says Grete. She then returns to the rows of troopers.
"Far be it from me to intervene in military matters but you might want to promote her." I say in an aside to Padme.
"You think? Rather presumptuous Master Dee-Jay. Any other disruptions to my command planned?" says Padme.
"No?" I say.
"Good. Well you can kiss my CMO goodbye. Physician Commander, I take it you are ready to depart as well?" says Padme.
Shayla looks surprised. "What? Did you know about this?" she says looking at me.
"No. I just knew you had to come with us. Congratulations by the way." I say and kiss her. After a while we separate.
"Excellent. Physician Commander, if you would come this way we can get you settled in. We'll send someone to collect your things." says Padme.
"One more question Sky Marshall. What is the name of your command?" I say.
"The Liberator. Now, excuse us. We have work to do." says Padme before the women depart.
Liberator? Figures.