Chapter twenty one part two - Pure Depression

Chapter twenty one part two

Pure Depression :(

Pretty soon, I found myself falling into pure depression; I cried and self-harmed lots.

I even tried ending my life.

Earlier I did that playing The Sims 2 Castaway Nintendo Wii game was free, this is because I've never been able to play on it once and to this day I till don't know where it is.

I also spoke about my long dog walks, well I could no longer go on them alone without crying my eyes out, bringing flashback memories of me and SZ.

He promised that we would be friends no matter what. What happened to that?

I also tried attempting suicide lots.

I tried everything from strangling myself to consuming chemicals, they had to hide the chemicals from me in the end because they found a couple of empty bottles in my room.

They also had to take out all wires, tights and cords that I had in an attempt to keep me safe.

This is how depressed and hopeless I felt.

At one point CAMHS even considered sending me to a psychiatric ward because of this, this never happened but I can't help but think about how things could have been now if I had.