Chapter 11

The Destroyer

I stepped forward as did he, I flash back. I remembered our first date, drinking Heineken, watching Samuel Jackson movies, just being myself and enjoying the feeling of his company. I remembered the first time we made love, him making me smile and asking for permission to kiss me, looking into those deep green eyes, they looked so much like glass gems. Him kissing my neck to my shoulders, the touch, and me slowing him down. The slick to the side light brown hair, the jokes, the times he was there. A tear comes down my face, he stares at me with intensity, he puts his hands in my face and wipes my tears as I continue my flashback. The first day as I left, I just get in a cab he grabs me "what?" I responded, "I know you're not going to act like nothing just happened between us" I lean in and kiss him, "happy" I smile and get in the cab "yes" he says. I fast forward to not seeing him for a while and ending up in his bed once again. We walk outside in the rain, I hug him and walk away, he grabs me, pushes me close to him, looks me in the eyes as he leans in slowly and gives me the most romantic kiss I've ever had. "You missed me" I responded, "why wouldn't I?" He continued. All to the end when I let him go, sitting down with my brother drinking whiskey "you will regret this" my brother says as I take a shot, I put my glass down "I know". I'm back standing right in front of him "Abdima" I finally speak "my human name, yes I'm the destroyer" he responds.

My heart beats fast, "you knew this whole time". He pushes me close "I did, I wasn't expecting everything I got, you make me feel" I put my hands on his chest "I'm guessing you have plans for me" he puts my chin up close to his lips "you can say" I push back two demons pull out chairs. We sit "there's a lot at stake in this fight Ausra" my widened eyes "no shit sherlock" he laughs "there's the feisty girl I met" I get up and walk around him. "Tell me your plans" he gets up and looks me in the eyes "we fight, I win, I won't kill you but you will marry me" I laugh "you most love torture", he laughs "sweetheart I invited torture". I smile and for a moment I think of it, a bitter wife, who wants a bitter wife. "You are insane" I laugh "what's wrong scared?" He asked. "no" I responded, "just trying to figure out what your actual plan is". Abdima touches my face "what do you think I want?" I push away "you certainly cannot have me" he laughs "how has Fenox worked out for you?" A tear came down my eyes, "not going to work" I threw out my blade, "just making me angry", he waved his hands, demons appeared and tie me down to a chair. He kisses me in my forehead "I see you've learned to turn your pain into anger, not very angel of you". I try to break free, I give in "never been to good at listening" I respond, "well you will listen to me today". The flames go out, he sits on a chair "she's out, you can go" the demons leave, he sits on a chair in front of me looks at me "sorry, I need you to see".

Everything is dark, all of the sudden I'm in Abdima's home. "You've been avoiding me" I look at him "I did get into a relationship, not a safe one but neither less a relationship" he looks at me "what's your point?" I look down "here I am again where I promised to never come back". He sat next to me "what happened "I sighed "I couldn't bring myself to enjoy the sex or emotionally connect, he felt that, he didn't like that" I felt the need to cry. I changed subjects, put my legs over his lap, Abdima couldn't hold the temptation, he rolls his hands up my dress and works his lips to mine. He kisses me but this time gently as to let me know he knew I was broken and I just needed to feel ok. He moves his hands from my thighs to my sides, to my back up my shoulders and pushes me down so our parts can get closer. He teases me into I get inpatient, I flip him over so he sits on the couch as I'm sitting on top of him. He kisses my lips and my neck into he feels my body relax. He looks at me and smiles knowing I'm still his, he goes under my dress takes it off and throws it in ground. He picks me up and takes me to his room, he lays me down as we kiss. We go a couple of rounds, he gives me his shirt and boxers, he holds me for a while as if he missed me and never wants to lose me. "I'm not going home tonight am I" he smiled "no, want a beer, I got your favorite" I smile "that sounds nice, you actually did miss me". We get up go sit in the kitchen he opens a beer for me and a beer for him "I see you want to avoid this conversation but you can't" I look at him holding back tears, he touches my bruises gently "what happened". I feel the tears gently coming down I couldn't hold them no more, I try to take a deep breath and hold my composure "I broke up with him, he went off, he said if he can't have me no one can and the fight started". His face got red in rage "why didn't you call me, or your brother, even your sons dad". I let out truth "I could have but people would say they will be there and when shit hits the fan, everyone has an excuse to how is my problem". He shakes his head "and if he would have killed you", I respond "then I would have been dead and people could have come to my funeral and pretend they would have been there". It got quiet "I did call my sons dad eventually, I didn't want my son to see me like this" he responded "what was his response" I put my head down "he was both angry and disappointed, thinks I shouldn't date no more", Abdima continues "and your family" I let a couple more tears down "they are judging me, on how I couldn't see this coming". He hugs me "Ausra I'm so sorry this happened to you, promise me if you need me you will call, no matter how bad things get" I pulled away "I would never put you in the mess of my mistakes". He hugs me again I cry in his arms, all I wanted was comfort and everyone in my life was being so cold. I was being called crazy, a bad mom, and constantly being reminded of my bad choices, and here I am in front of my mess around, the man I left, he's more human than all my surroundings, just understanding I am human. My whole life I've been treated like I can't break, it felt good just being treated like what I am, a woman who couldn't see the evil in front of me. I started to remember why I loved him so much, not just the fact we could sit and watch television as we enjoy each other's company but also that I could I be myself, he was understanding and not judgmental. It hurt feeling myself love him, he wipes my tears and kissed me let's go watch some tv, he lays on my lap, I play with his hair, he feels me cold puts the blanket over us, I fell asleep, I wake up he is carrying me to the bed. He stares deep into my eyes, he kisses me and touches me gently, we make love once more, I fall asleep in his arms, I slept well for the first time in a long time, no nightmares.

I wake up I'm crying Abdima is holding me "I didn't let you down when humanity did" the scent of vanilla, came to mind. I used to always wear vanilla body spray, he missed me so much he bought vanilla scents for his home, relaxing the scent of vanilla. I grab him and move back "you are the Destroyer, I won't fall for this" he looked at me "you make me feel, I didn't feel anything into I met you, but that day, I felt anger and the need to hold and protect you". I stepped back I couldn't get my thoughts straight, it couldn't be that I made the Destroyer feel that's impossible, but thinking back to every moment, every touch, every time he wouldn't let me walk away. I thought of Alvis every time I pushed him back then I remember his coldness, and I remembered he didn't have feelings for me. I sit and think, Fenox, he is the deepest feeling I've ever had, the most peace and happiness I've ever felt but I didn't push it and neither did he, when the chemistry was there and we couldn't find a reason why not too, we just did. That's how it should be two people agreeing but life hurts so bad. Abdima looks at me "you know, Fenox is your weakness, it's what attaches you to the good in you, knowing one person did it right, this whole humanity thing you play in your head". I look blankly as he continues "how did it feel to walk dead while being alive, realizing the Creators creation isn't so perfect?" I took a deep breath "I didn't take it personal, all those things I've been through mentally change my view, I was no longer bias to the design. Nothing stains like pain, some pain is too great". He laughed "I'm sure glad he is with Ellie and I am impressed we feel the same" I smile and respond "because he did all the things you couldn't do? Does it make you angry" he replied "no, because for once you felt ok and meant it, you didn't know what to do, you had full trust in him, feeling peace you never thought you would feel, you wanted to keep him like that in your thoughts". I got up "enough games!!" he smiled "did I hit a nerve?" I sprout my blade "maybe, maybe not, you know me so well you figure it out". We walk in circles intensely staring each other down "your eyes get dark when you are angry, I am loving it, the daughter of arc angel Michael and Cybele. Let's make this fun I win, you marry me, you win I'll give up the throne" I gasp "you are on let's do this".

Chapter 11 Inspired By: The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus - Face Down

Seether - Fine Again