The Dreadful

The cry of alarm that left Jesse as well as the way he involuntarily squeezed Pablo in an effort not to drop him and simultaneously run to Pearl, jolted the little boy and he started crying again, this time confused.

Carefully, Jesse put the child down to assess Pearl's situation. It took all Jesse's training to calmly apologise to Pablo, ask him to quiet down while pulling out his phone to call an ambulance. Once he was off the phone and able to, he called Sam, asking him to come get Pablo as soon as possible because Pearl was going to hospital.

Jesse's reasoning was Pablo would relate best to the person who looked most like him. Someone he knew. And he had the presence of mind to ask him to call their mom, because Pearl was her god daughter and she also knew how to deal with Pablo.

The ambulance arrived as they were still on the phone, so Sam promised to meet them at the hospital. Jesse hadn't wanted to take Pablo there but now he had no choice. Pearl was barely breathing and the medics rushed in and put her on oxygen.

Sam met Jesse at the main entrance to the hospital. The former came out of his car at a half run and halted when he saw his brother holding a sleeping child. Pablo only whimpered as he was handed over but soon settled in Sam's arms. He'd fallen asleep on the way to the hospital and Jesse told him now that Pablo would probably be asleep for at least an hour.

"What happened?" Sam demanded to know, his voice low and urgent.

Jesse shook her head. "Her medication isn't working the way it's supposed to. I'll call Douglas but she's going to have to make some changes…"

"What do you mean?"

"This isn't the first time I've had to intervene as a doctor because she doesn't take the initial steps to ward off an attack. She's blacked out before and she's come near enough to having an attack more than once. This was no different. I asked her how she was feeling and she insisted she could make it home." Pause. "She terrified Pablo at the house. You might need to convince him she's not dead when he wakes up."

Sam frowned, hugging the boy closer to his chest. "How am I supposed to do that?"

"Bring him back here a little later, when Pearl is awake. Listen, I have to go inside now, but everything he needs is in the bags."

"Okay. Go take care of the pearl," Sam said, his concern clear on his face.

"She'll be okay," Jesse said assuredly.

Pearl woke up with a feeling of dread and pain in her chest. She had an oxygen mask on and an IV in her arm. Her chest hurt, her throat was dry and her mind was fuzzy. Looking around she saw it was now evening, street lights were on outside. Looking around stopped when she faced the door and saw a shadow on her other side.

Jesse was sitting by her bed.

Noticing she was awake, he came to stand beside her. "Hey, honey," he said softly. "Welcome back."

She tried for a smile but failed dismally.

"Do you want some water?"

Pearl nodded and Jesse moved around in her room, returning moments later with a paper cup, he helped her move her mask. Holding the cup to her lips, he let her take a sip.

"Thank you."

He nodded, placing the cup on the available table.

"I spoke to your doctor," he began calmly, a few minutes later. "She says you staying in overnight isn't a bad idea. That way you can start the battery of tests in the morning and you won't have to come back later." Pause. "I agree with that reasoning, don't you?"

She nodded again.

"I'm sorry I wasn't able to catch you when you collapsed at the house," he said next.

Hearing him apologise brought the guilt flooding over Pearl. Tears filled her eyes and she shook her head once, not wanting to hear that from him. Jesse didn't notice immediately. He was looking down at their intertwined fingers.

"It was very hard for me to experience that whole incident as it unfolded." He sounded slightly choked. "Pablo- hearing him cry was difficult. I can't stand it when he's hurting but seeing him terrified for you, was awful… and my heart literally stopped for a second watching you crumple to the floor. I almost dropped him."

His voice had acquired a tension Pearl had never heard before. It sounded like pain, but a little harsher. It didn't take her long to realise that he was tightly holding the rein on his emotions. And primarily he was furious. She opened her mouth to speak, but no sound came out.

"Don't say anything yet," he told her softly. The way his eyes flashed showed her what his voice had already told her but a tender look soon replaced whatever she had seen. "Just listen for a while."

Pearl nodded, swallowing with difficulty. As if he could read her mind, he lifted the mask and gave her more water. While he did this, he spoke.

"I am glad you agreed to re-do the battery tomorrow. It really wasn't up for debate, if my happiness matters to you at all. If you want me to have any level of peace. It's almost obvious that you care so little for yourself, I won't even make that my argument."

Jesse's jaw clenched momentarily. Her brown eyes widened.

"I've asked you to take care of yourself. For you to collapse, to me, was an indication that you haven't been feeling okay for a while or that you ignored the trigger that set off an extreme reaction." Pause. "It doesn't add up in my mind. You say you want to be with me and that you're even ready for life together with Pablo in the picture, but I-" he stopped and took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a moment. His fingers flexed over hers once and then he opened his eyes and looked at her.

His beautiful eyes were bright, burning right through Pearl. Opening his mouth again, he said, "I- care about you so much, my mind can't help but imagine all the worst scenarios of what could happen to you. What if you'd collapsed alone or watching Pablo by yourself? I can't do this if you're going to risk your life- or my son's." His voice shook on the last word. "He thought you died Pearl. He was so scared, he cried himself to sleep on the way here. And now he's going to wake up in a strange house without me. Can you imagine how terrified today might have made him?" His voice was a tortured whisper.

Pearl could imagine and she felt incredibly miserable. A tear rolled down her cheek.

"I don't know if I can handle you crying right now, to be honest, sweetheart. Hearing Pablo cry like that almost broke me today. And I feel so terribly useless because I couldn't even help you when you needed me."

"I'm sorry," she whispered.