Chapter 7

Mila's POV:

Okay... Okay... Keep calm, Mila. Oh, who the fuck am I kidding? SHE KISSED MY FOREHEAD! That was crazy. I can't believe it. She just walked out like it was completely ordinary. As if it was natural. I loved it. I loved that kiss. Her touch was slightly warmer than earlier, but still, her touch and that kiss sent a shiver through me. Maybe it's not her being cold; perhaps it's just the electrifying feeling she gives me. I started biting my bottom lip, envisioning her actually kissing me. Fuck I've gotta stop. I kissed my Mami goodnight and went up to my room. I took the bandage off my nose as I winced. I looked at myself in the mirror, noticing the black eyes forming.

To most people, when they see themselves like this, they have no idea who they are, but not me. I've seen this face looking back at me plenty of times. I started to feel the darkness pulling at me.. and I just tried to push through it. I got into the shower and made sure it was scolding hot. I wanted to be numb. I didn't want to feel the darkness... I knelt down, and I added another cut to my many other ones... I deserved this pain. This is what I needed. The only thing I wanted to feel. As I cut again in a different spot on my other ankle. I sat down as the hot water pelted my back, and I just watched as the blood pooled out. Finally, becoming numb. I'm sorry, Julian... I'm so sorry—the tears mixing with the water surrounding me.

I washed my wounds, and once the bleeding stopped, I got out of the shower. Once out, I started bandaging my cuts and my nose. I got dressed in underwear and threw on an oversized t-shirt. No bra, I left the babies be free! I made my way out to the balcony. The moon was out fully, and it was beautiful how it lit up the sky with the stars. My thoughts quickly drifted to Emma. She's so gorgeous, but she's so mysterious at the same time. A lot of weird things have happened today with her eyes, and saying stuff that only she could answer if she knew what was going through my head. But man, when I looked into her eyes, I was transfixed... mesmerized. Whatever I felt, I instantly felt calm, comforted, and safe. I don't know how to explain it. I.. Think... I really, really like her. I started to become sad... My mami would never approve. Only Julian knows. I hope he's okay... I bet Emma doesn't even like girls, but why would she kiss my forehead like that? Maybe she's just that type of friend.

Filled with so many thoughts, I just couldn't take it anymore. I had to drown it out. . I put my headphones in and let the world fade around me. I drifted off, feeling a cold chill around me, but it felt good.

I woke up once I heard the front door slam. I instantly heard him yelling and glass crashing. I hurriedly went to hide in my closet. Ironic, I know... I can hear the thuds as his fist meets the body. I was trembling and already feeling the tears make their way down my cheeks.

"I said drop your fucking pants, you whore." I heard a huge slap. I heard my mom crying. I need to do something. I can't stay here. I have to protect her. I grabbed my plastic bat and made my way into the living room. I saw him in between my mom violating her and choking her out. I ran up to him and swung as hard as I could, and hit him in the back of the head. He immediately fell off my mom.

"Stay away from her!" I screamed as I hit him in the face and saw his nose start gushing blood. I swung again, hitting him in the junk. He let out a sharp breath. I helped my mom into my room, and I locked my door, but it didn't stop him.

He busted down my door and grabbed me by the throat, screaming at me that I was going to die, as my mom was hysterically crying, begging him to stop. Then everything went black.

I woke up in a panic gasping for air as, just seconds ago, he was crushing my windpipe. I hurried and reached up to my throat to make sure there wasn't anything there... Sweat was drenching my body. "Fuck..." I just muttered softly... I can't ever escape him. He torments everywhere. I'll never be normal again...

I got up and walked to the bathroom. And I started splashing cold water on my face and the back of my neck... I looked at myself and just got disgusted. I looked away and went back to my bed.. my thoughts drifted back to Emma.. and wait.. how did I get to my bed... I... I must have practically been sleepwalking.. uhh I can't get her off my mind, and I can't get that piece of shit out of my mind either. I was so fucking depressed at this moment I could feel the darkness closing in on me, and all of a sudden, I heard a small voice in my head

"It's okay. You're safe. I won't let anyone hurt you. Mila.. you are so beautiful. Everything will be okay." The words kept replaying, and it felt nice I was no longer scared, frustrated, or confused. I just felt free; I felt like the darkness didn't have a hold on me anymore. I felt safe again.. just like when I look at Emma... I finally drifted off again, and when I started dreaming, I was happy to find that it wasn't a horrible flashback to my mom and me being beaten again. Instead, I was lying on the beach with Emma. She was so beautiful.. the way she looked at me.. made me feel beautiful too.

"Hey, beautiful." She said to me, "wanna go for a swim?" I stood up.

"Okay, I'll race you!" I said playfully.

"Okay, I'll count down then, Mila; you can say go." I nodded smiling

"1...2.." She counted down slowly. I cut her off.

"GO!!" I screamed, taking off running, hoping to catch her off guard, but as I looked behind me, she wasn't there. I stopped, and when I turned to look at the water, she was right in front of me. I just looked into her beautiful eyes...

"Your eyes are so mesmerizing.." she smiled, and I could feel myself start to blush, so I looked down. In response, she then grabbed my chin and made me look back at her...

"Hey, don't be embarrassed or scared to look at me. I'm not going to judge you. I'm not going anywhere, Mila. Besides, you are so adorable when you blush." I started to blush even more. Her words filled me with an unknown warm feeling; I don't really know a good word for how to describe it, though. I just looked at her, and I nodded, words completely lost to me at this point. She started bending down to kiss me, our lips barely apart.. oh god, how much I wanted to kiss her. Would you please close the distance? I don't think I dare to do it myself.

*Alarm playing September by Earth, Wind, and Fire*

My alarm brought me back to the real world. I quickly turned over and grabbed my phone, and shut it off. I collapsed back onto my bed with an annoyed huff escaping my lips. Why? Why do the best dreams always seem to get interrupted while the nightmares get to run their course?

"Hmmm..." that's so weird. I immediately snapped out of it.

"Mija, Get ready!! Breakfast is almost done. Also, your friend is here!" My friends. Wait...

"WHAT?!" I screamed... I instantly started freaking out... Who could possibly be down there? I scrambled out of bed. It probably only took me 5 minutes to get ready. I definitely set a new personal record. I rushed in hopes that it was Emma downstairs. I just kept begging that it was her. I don't know why I feel so drawn to her, but I am. I grabbed my bag and phone and bounced down the stairs.

As I walked into the kitchen, I looked to my left, and there she was. She. Looked. Gorgeous. Holy shit. When I think she can't look sexier, she wears that. Shorts that hug her curves and show off her long-toned legs. I realized how noticeably I must be checking her out. I feel my face furiously burn.. as I just try to brush it off... I looked up, and she was just smiling like crazy, looking at me like she knew my inner secrets...

"Good morning Mami," I say as I kiss her on the cheek. I then turned toward Emma. "Good morning Emma." God, the way her name felt on my tongue.. my thoughts started to slip dirty, and I quickly cut off my thoughts and composed myself. I am so glad she can't hear my thoughts... That would be so embarrassing. She started to chuckle to herself as if she was laughing at her own inside joke. She just looked up at me, still smiling, and as our eyes locked onto one another, the world around me slipped away. It was as if we were the only ones who existed. There is no one else I'd rather be left alone with, in this world, than her. I crave these moments with her; I crave everything about her.

"Good morning Mila! How are you feeling today?" Remembering that I probably looked like a fucking disaster, I looked down, feeling insecure. I knew that the dark circles and bags under my eyes were probably highly noticeable. I got ready in 5 minutes, so who knows if I look presentable. I most likely didn't. An overwhelming urge to look up at Emma brought me out of my negative thoughts. As soon as our eyes met every bit of insecurity, I was feeling immediately washed away.

"I'm fine. I'm sore, but I feel way better than yesterday. Besides gives me a good excuse to get out of exercising. Plus, I get to go around saying, 'You should see what the other guy looks like.'" We both chuckled along with my mom. I turned to my mom.

"Mami... did you move me from my balcony to my bed last night?" I questioned, wondering again how I got to my bed.

"No, Mija. Of course not. I don't think I could anyway," She said as she pointed to her flexed arm to show what little muscle she had. Emma and I both let out small laughs.

"I guess I must have just sleepwalked back to my bed.." I looked up to Emma, and I could tell she was a little tense.

"Are you okay, Emma?" Her facial expressions became void of any emotion.

"Yeah, of course, I am. Anyway, I already talked to your mom. I'm going to drive you to school today. You know, because of your injury and everything." She said this in a tone as if I had no choice. I saw my mom stiffen out of the corner of my eye.

"Mami... I can drive myself." I groaned out, sounding a bit like a 5-year-old on the verge of a tantrum.

"But Mija, she's already here." She gestured over to where Emma was.

"Mami, I'm fine." I looked from my mom over to Emma looking at me intently; she almost seemed to have a cocky smirk on her face. It's like she already knew that this was going to go her way. I glared at her a bit. Even though driving with Emma to school sounds like a dream come true, I don't particularly appreciate being told what to do or have no say in situations, especially when they directly involve me.

"Come on, Mila, just one day." She said this with a smile that made me absolutely melt. That smile is dangerous. I didn't care about why I was upset anymore.

"Okay, Emma, ONE day." I made sure to emphasize the one-day part. My entire body was elated to be riding with her to school, and I would be lying if I said I didn't want it to go past one day, but I didn't want to seem pathetic. I don't want to make it seem like I'm throwing myself at her. Whatever, I'm just not going to think about this right now; there are waffles in front of me that are begging to be eaten. We ate our breakfast and headed out the door. Emma opened the passenger side door for me. Then quickly slid into the driver's side.

"Thank you. You didn't have to open the door for me." My voice sounded so shy and small.

"I'll do anything for you, Mila." She said this, not taking her eyes off the road in front of her. We stopped and picked up Chloe; she was happy that I brought her bacon. We talked a bit as Emma stayed quiet. We arrived at school about ten minutes before the first bell.

As we got out of the car, of course, I dropped my books. I don't understand why I'm so clumsy. I bent down to pick up my books and saw Emma bend down to help me. Our hands touched, and even though her hand was cold, I felt this warmth spread like wildfire throughout my body. It felt like a shockwave went off inside me, causing electric shocks to ripple their way from the point of contact into tsunami-sized waves that flooded my senses. I pulled my hand back, taking in a sharp breath.

"Why are you so cold, and why do you always shock me?" She looked at Chloe. Why did she look to Chloe?!

"My body temperature has always been a little colder than others. It may change soon... Due to um, this new medicine I'm taking." What does she have a heart problem or like anemia?

"Well, I'm glad you're taking medicine for this because I honestly don't think it's healthy to be that cold. It's as if you have hypothermia." She shifted as if she was uncomfortable with our conversation. She didn't reply to me either; she just grabbed my last book off the ground. She looked at it intently before she handed it back to me.

"So, is this your diary?" She said with a smirking smile.

"No! It's a journal. Where I sketch and write about my day."

"Oh really? So, you can draw and do artistic things like that?" I shifted anxiously, breaking eye contact with her.

"Um, I guess... I don't know if I would really consider myself an artist. It is just something I do for fun and as a stress reliever." I immediately changed the subject and turned my attention to Chloe. "So, Chloe, how are you doing? Sorry again about yesterday! I'm so clumsy..." I could tell she caught on to the fact that I didn't want to talk about myself anymore and accepted the deflection onto her. She is seriously a blessing.

"I'm doing well today, and there is no need to apologize. You're my friend; I know you would do the same for me." I heard that correctly, right? Did she really just call me her friend? I could feel a smile make its way onto my face. That makes me so happy that I actually have a friend. A genuine one at that too. And to think I was so scared that I wouldn't have one here...

"Well, this is my locker. I'll catch up with you in first period!" As I stopped at my locker, I looked over and noticed Emma briefly pause next to me. She seemed very hesitant at first but continued walking with Chloe down the hallway. I felt the urge to look in their direction, and when I did, I noticed that Emma was looking back at me. You could see in her eyes that she was conflicted about something like she was fighting some internal battle that was completely unknown to everyone surrounding her. I wish I could hear what was going on insider her head, so I knew what was troubling her.