Chapter 1

"I love you" Claire says in front of me with full of love in her face. But instead of feeling a happiness in my chest part is I feel annoyed. I don't know why but I don't really like her to be my wife. But damn! I don't have any choices though. Because of this fvkvng so called arraged marriage that my parents did to me is like a misery of my life. I feel too much anger of this woman in front of me because if she didn't came into our life.. my life to be exact, I didn't feel this so miserable life.

"Babe? Are you ok?" she ask me when I still staring at her. She's beautiful but I can't feel any weird feelings in my heart. We're 5 years of marriage but still nothing change. We still argue like before. Yes. Even before,we argued. Since we're in secondary. She's my worst enemy ever. When she's near in me my blood is boiling. She's into my nerves. I felt too much annoyed and pissed when she starts to talked to me.

"Hey! Are you with me babe?"my mind go back to reality when she shouts and waving her hand in front of my face.

"I have to go." after saying those words I immediately walk away to her. I can't survive long when she's with me. I feel like I'm dying each and everyday we are together.

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"What the hell! What do you think you're doing huh!? Stupid!" I shout at the middle of the mall in front of my fvcking wife. I can't help myself but to shout her because she did such a stupid things in the grocery area. She holds my hand so I got pissed. Yeah! It's not a big deal but I don't like it specially when my mortal enemy is the one holding my hands.

"What's wrong with you?" she asked me with a teary eyes.

"What's wrong with me?huh? Seriously?"I asked her back without looking at her.

"What I have done to you Albert? We've been together for damn 5 years! But here we are! Nothing change." her voice is start breaking. She's sobbing so hard. Fvck this woman! She's not just a fvcking problem of my ass but she's also a catching attention to others.

"Stop Claire. We need to go now. Everybody's looking at us. It's embarrassing."I said and hold her hands and start walking.

We arrived and Claire is still crying.

"Stop crying. It won't change the situation and the fvcking reality. Just accept that you and I will no longer a chance to be ok." I said with a cold tone. I expect her reaction to cry louder. But I am shocked when she gives me a wide smile. A pure smile. A smile like everything is ok, like nothings happened between the two of us. I don't know why but I feel a little bit happiness and excitement. When I saw her beautiful and pure smile. I feel something weird in me. Shit! Because of that smile!? No! No! lt is not gonna happen!

"If crying out loud can't change something. I am hoping that smile can change everything." I was staring at her with an amazement in my face. She stand and walk out. And here I am still staring at her walking away from me.

Weeks passed. But the weird feelings I felt when Claire smiled at me is still there. I've noticed that Claire is having a distance in me. She don't talk to me like before. She only speak when I ask her or she wants to ask me something. And I don't understand what thought came up into my mind. 'A thought of missing her'. Shit! I need to control this fvcking feelings of mine! This is wrong! This is not me! Because the old me is don't fvcking miss her. Don't care of her. Don't think of her. Don't fvcking want her. And don't damn fvcking like her. But now? I am too different to the old me.

"Albert, Let's eat."I'm a little bit shocked and in the other side, happiness sucks in me. But I need to stop this bullshit feelings. I need to make myself hard as a wall just like before. I need to be strong to hide my vulnerability. Because it is too much embarrassed when I admit that I'm starting to fall my mortal enemy/wife.

"Eat by yourself. I don't want to eat with you."I tried by best just to sounds doesn't care and affected of what she offers in me. But deep inside my heart beats so fast. So fast, that even a horse can't defeat in terms of racing. I keep my voice cold.

"O-ok but if you feel starvation just go to the kitchen and eat. I will prepare a food for you."Sad and disappointment covers her voice. I feel little pain in my chest. Now, I'm damn affected into that woman that I treat as an enemy since we first knew each other. But now, it's kinda different. It's like the opposite of who I am right now.