Adoption

I hugged Lo and said "I'm going with you!"

Lo said "What about your job!"

I said "All schools have someone like me. Don't think about that ok."

Lo said "I don't want to go back with mom and dad!"

I said "I'm going to be with you the whole time."

Lo said "No you have to work."

I said "No I worked because I was the head of the school and wanted to work. Someone is in charge so don't worry."

Lo asked "Your going to jail again?"

I said "No I'm free but Jackie is going to jail for lying about me."

Lo said "I don't like her! Now were going back to mom and dad because of her."

Lo started to cry. I said "Listen to me Lo. You need to calm down before we all get separated or go to jail. Remember these police officers will be after us for the next several months."

Lo said "Ask Suga to help us!"

I said "Suga is already helping ok. Just calm down everything will be ok."

Lo said "What if they do go to jail and you."

I said "As long as they agree to sign the papers we'll be fine. They won't hold back they don't have any choice."

Lo said "I don't trust them. They don't like you and may try to put you in jail for revenge."

I said "There will be so much protection around us. It will be different this time. Just relax."

We went into our parents house again and Lo looked so sad.

My mother said "Because of you the police could deport us, put your sister in adoption and put you in jail!"

I said "They investigated but not completely everything. It's not like I went to go snitch on all of us."

My father said "You will be the cause if I don't get to see Lo again."

I said in my head "You would be happy if you went back to your country without all of us."

Lo said "Can you all just stop! You just have to sign the papers that Moni can be my mom."

My mother shouted "What?! Why?!"

I said "I just need permission to have her with me."

My mother said "I won't sign nothing. You can leave by yourself."

I said "I won't leave Lo here with you guys. The police will come and investigate you guys if you don't sign."

My father said "Oh! So, your threatening us?!"

I said "No. I'm telling you what will happen by the police if they find out you guys can't be here."

Lo said "Just sign. Anyways, after you sign we have to be here for four months."

My mother said "This is ridiculous! You know what? I'm not signing. If we get deported I'm taking Lo with me."

Lo gasped and said "I don't want to go!"

My mother said "To bad!"

I said "She can't. She needs a passport signed by you guys but you can't."

My father asked "Why can't we?"

I said "You need citizenship for that."

My mother said "She can't just stay here alone!"

I said "That's why she'll get adopted by me or some other person."

Lo said "Sign so the police won't investigate anything."

I said "I haven't taken Lo away from you guys. I bring her when I can and you guys know it. She'll always be my sister not my daughter. I don't gain anything by taking her away but you guys do. Both of you get to stay here and not have to leave. Just act normal when they come with the paper work."

My mother said "Wait. How has she traveled without a passport?"

I said "Minors can travel without the consent of the parents in South Korea. Anyways, Suga has his own jet we don't need any of that stuff."

My parents looked at eachother. I quickly put my index finger infront of my lips as I looked at Lo. Indicating her not to say she did have a passport.

A police officer came to the house and got the paper work ready.

He asked Lo a question which made us all nervous.

He asked "Why do you want Moni as your mother? You don't like your original parents?"

Lo said "I like my parents but Moni is my sister. I just want to live with her and Suga. They both care for me alot and I love them."

I said in my head "Oh no we're screwed."

The police officer said "You want guardianship over Lo but does Suga do? Is he your husband?"

I said "Oh no! He's not but I'm not-"

The police officer said "If both of you want guardianship over Lo you need to be married."

I said "Can't I just adopt her alone?"

The police officer said "You would have a better chance of adopting her."

I said "I won't marry him to get Lo. We will sign the papers like that. As long as I have a job and a home for her I believe I will get the guardianship."

The police officer said "It would fasten the pro-"

I said "I don't care. Where do I sign?"

My parents signed forcefully and I felt bad but it was that or get deported. I worked so hard to keep this lie going and wasn't going to let Jackie ruin everything.

The police officer said "I'll be back in about four months."

My heart cracked as I heard "four months."

He left and Lo went to her room. I walked into my old room and said "Just survive another four months."

Suga came through my window and said "How did things go?"

I said "We just signed. It should be done in about four months."

Suga said "What?! I'm going to have to move in here with you."

I said "Your crazy! Now more than ever we have to be in our best behavior. These cops will be here and there watching every move I make just so I won't get Lo."

Suga said "Isn't there another way to make the process faster. This is ridiculous."

I said "Parents that adopt are making me feel what they feel now."

Suga hugged me and said "I will go talk to the police officers and try to buy them out."

I pulled away as I said "Don't! I don't want you to get involved."

Suga looked at me confused and asked "Why?"

I said "Lo told the cop that she wanted you as her dad. Things got complicated. I don't want them to think anything about us. So, please stay out of it."

Suga said "Aw Lo said that. She's so sweet."

I said "I know right."

Suga said "Wait."

I looked at him confused and said "What?"

Suga said "I know I said something like this before but if we get married and adopt her. We would get guardianship over her real quick!"

I recalled how I had heard Jackie had done this for revenge. Apparently, Suga had broken up with her and she was pissed.

I said "Do you hear yourself? You just broke up with Jackie and your over here thinking about marriage?! Have you lost your mind?"

Suga said "I know you don't want to get married but think about it. I don't know if Lo would survive this hell. Are you really going to put her through this?"

I said "Are you blaming all of this on me?! Let me remind you that Jackie was the one who started this! Not me!"

Suga said "I wouldn't make Lo suffer through these four months!"

I said "I wouldn't force someone to get married to me to save someone else's life! It's only four months calm down!"

Suga said "Look I'm sorry I just really want to help you guys. I shouldn't had-"

I said "Suga leave. Go to your studio and do your work. This is my problem not yours. Remember you went with Jackie now go suppport her in jail and leave me alone."

Suga said "I went with her because you told me to go find someone else!"

I said "AND YOU DID! But once you saw me you came after me and left Jackie!"

Suga calmly said "That's what you do when you see the love of your life. That's how you react when that's the one."

I didn't say anything but just stare at him.

Suga kissed me on the cheek and whispered "I'm tired of all of this and I don't know if I'll come back. All of this is just killing me."

I nodded and said "Go ahead and leave. This isn't healthy for any of us. Once, the process is complete me and Lo will leave."

Suga nodded and asked "Do you even love me?"

I didn't say anything as I didn't want to hold him back in this toxic life.

Suga said "Answer me!"

I jumped a little as I heard his shout and said "No I don't love you. If I did I would stop you but I don't. We're not dating and you were with Jackie."

Suga nodded as he turned away and said "Sad eyes that still hide well lies."

I watched Suga leave and I threw myself on my bed.

"I'm back here again and thinking back to the way that I used too. How did I want marriage and kids not long ago. How did everything just go back so fast? What is wrong with me? I want to give up but I can't. Lo is the only one holding me back now." I said in my head as I broke down in tears.

*Next Early Morning*

"Let's go for a jog, Lo." I said with a smile.

Lo said "Is there a playground?"

I said "Yes."

Lo said with excitement "Let's go!"

My mother said "Where do you think your going?!"

I said "We're going out for a run."

My mother said "This early, alone!"

I said "Our bodyguards are outside."

Me and Lo quickly left the house before she stopped us.

Lo said "I'll run with you for a lap but then I'll play."

I said "Sounds like a plan."

Lo said "We should invite Suga! Wake him up early just to get him mad."

I laughed and said "Your mean but my doctor is coming later to talk to me."

Lo asked "Are you sick?"

I chuckled and said "No she's my friend and is a fan of what me and Suga do."

Lo said "That's so cool."

I laughed and looked out the window until we got to our destination.

"Keep an eye out." I said to the bodyguards before getting off the car.

Me and Lo began our jog but she stopped after the first lap like she said. I ran another four laps before Meri got there. I sat down on the bench and drinked some water. I looked ahead and Lo already had made friends on the playground.

Meri said "She's getting so big."

I looked at her as she took a seat next to me and said "Yeah she is."

Meri said "What's wrong? You were doing so well."

I catched my breath as I said "I think I lost the new me. I don't want to get married or have kids again."

Meri sighed and said "What made all of this change?"

I said "I'm living with my parents again for four months. I need to stay there in order to adopt Lo."

Meri said "I'm sure your stressed out and very nervous with everything going on. Moni you need to remember that you already are a parent and you have been ever since Lo was born."

I smiled as I nodded and looked at her.

Meri said "Your doing amazing! Suga has been with you through thick and thin. You both love each other and you both love Lo like a child. Think about it, you guys are practically living together and have been taking care of Lo this whole time."

I let out a tear and looked away. I said "I know but I don't know why this is so hard for me."

Meri said "Yes you do. Your scared and fear for everyone's future. Remember you have control over your life. Stop making everything more complicated with your thoughts."

I put my hands over my face and I said "I want to marry Suga and have kids but then everything just changes in seconds."

I put my hands down and looked at her.

Meri said "If you keep thinking like that everything will keep changing. How about you call him and just say yes? Maybe you won't back down and just tell him how you feel! I'm sure he will help you with his love."

I said in my head "I don't want to hurt him anymore."

I softly said to Meri "What if I just let him go instead?"